Чарльз Диккенс
Dombey and Son
‘Mr Toots,’ said Walter, ‘I am happy to be able to relieve your mind. Pray calm yourself. Miss Dombey is safe and well.’
‘Sir!’ cried Mr Toots, starting from his chair and shaking hands with him anew, ‘the relief is so excessive, and unspeakable, that if you were to tell me now that Miss Dombey was married even, I could smile. Yes, Captain Gills,’ said Mr Toots, appealing to him, ‘upon my soul and body, I really think, whatever I might do to myself immediately afterwards, that I could smile, I am so relieved.’
‘It will be a greater relief and delight still, to such a generous mind as yours,’ said Walter, not at all slow in returning his greeting, ‘to find that you can render service to Miss Dombey. Captain Cuttle, will you have the kindness to take Mr Toots upstairs?’
The Captain beckoned to Mr Toots, who followed him with a bewildered countenance, and, ascending to the top of the house, was introduced, without a word of preparation from his conductor, into Florence’s new retreat.
Poor Mr Toots’s amazement and pleasure at sight of her were such, that they could find a vent in nothing but extravagance. He ran up to her, seized her hand, kissed it, dropped it, seized it again, fell upon one knee, shed tears, chuckled, and was quite regardless of his danger of being pinned by Diogenes, who, inspired by the belief that there was something hostile to his mistress in these demonstrations, worked round and round him, as if only undecided at what particular point to go in for the assault, but quite resolved to do him a fearful mischief.
‘Oh Di, you bad, forgetful dog! Dear Mr Toots, I am so rejoiced to see you!’
‘Thankee,’ said Mr Toots, ‘I am pretty well, I’m much obliged to you, Miss Dombey. I hope all the family are the same.’
Mr Toots said this without the least notion of what he was talking about, and sat down on a chair, staring at Florence with the liveliest contention of delight and despair going on in his face that any face could exhibit.
‘Captain Gills and Lieutenant Walters have mentioned, Miss Dombey,’ gasped Mr Toots, ‘that I can do you some service. If I could by any means wash out the remembrance of that day at Brighton, when I conducted myself – much more like a Parricide than a person of independent property,’ said Mr Toots, with severe self-accusation, ‘I should sink into the silent tomb with a gleam of joy.’
‘Pray, Mr Toots,’ said Florence, ‘do not wish me to forget anything in our acquaintance. I never can, believe me. You have been far too kind and good to me always.’
‘Miss Dombey,’ returned Mr Toots, ‘your consideration for my feelings is a part of your angelic character. Thank you a thousand times. It’s of no consequence at all.’
‘What we thought of asking you,’ said Florence, ‘is, whether you remember where Susan, whom you were so kind as to accompany to the coach-office when she left me, is to be found.’
‘Why I do not certainly, Miss Dombey,’ said Mr Toots, after a little consideration, ‘remember the exact name of the place that was on the coach; and I do recollect that she said she was not going to stop there, but was going farther on. But, Miss Dombey, if your object is to find her, and to have her here, myself and the Chicken will produce her with every dispatch that devotion on my part, and great intelligence on the Chicken’s, can ensure.’
Mr Toots was so manifestly delighted and revived by the prospect of being useful, and the disinterested sincerity of his devotion was so unquestionable, that it would have been cruel to refuse him. Florence, with an instinctive delicacy, forbore to urge the least obstacle, though she did not forbear to overpower him with thanks; and Mr Toots proudly took the commission upon himself for immediate execution.
‘Miss Dombey,’ said Mr Toots, touching her proffered hand, with a pang of hopeless love visibly shooting through him, and flashing out in his face, ‘Good-bye! Allow me to take the liberty of saying, that your misfortunes make me perfectly wretched, and that you may trust me, next to Captain Gills himself. I am quite aware, Miss Dombey, of my own deficiencies – they’re not of the least consequence, thank you – but I am entirely to be relied upon, I do assure you, Miss Dombey.’
With that Mr Toots came out of the room, again accompanied by the Captain, who, standing at a little distance, holding his hat under his arm and arranging his scattered locks with his hook, had been a not uninterested witness of what passed. And when the door closed behind them, the light of Mr Toots’s life was darkly clouded again.
‘Captain Gills,’ said that gentleman, stopping near the bottom of the stairs, and turning round, ‘to tell you the truth, I am not in a frame of mind at the present moment, in which I could see Lieutenant Walters with that entirely friendly feeling towards him that I should wish to harbour in my breast. We cannot always command our feelings, Captain Gills, and I should take it as a particular favour if you’d let me out at the private door.’
‘Brother,’ returned the Captain, ‘you shall shape your own course. Wotever course you take, is plain and seamanlike, I’m wery sure.’
‘Captain Gills,’ said Mr Toots, ‘you’re extremely kind. Your good opinion is a consolation to me. There is one thing,’ said Mr Toots, standing in the passage, behind the half-opened door, ‘that I hope you’ll bear in mind, Captain Gills, and that I should wish Lieutenant Walters to be made acquainted with. I have quite come into my property now, you know, and – and I don’t know what to do with it. If I could be at all useful in a pecuniary point of view, I should glide into the silent tomb with ease and smoothness.’
Mr Toots said no more, but slipped out quietly and shut the door upon himself, to cut the Captain off from any reply.
Florence thought of this good creature, long after he had left her, with mingled emotions of pain and pleasure. He was so honest and warm-hearted, that to see him again and be assured of his truth to her in her distress, was a joy and comfort beyond all price; but for that very reason, it was so affecting to think that she caused him a moment’s unhappiness, or ruffled, by a breath, the harmless current of his life, that her eyes filled with tears, and her bosom overflowed with pity. Captain Cuttle, in his different way, thought much of Mr Toots too; and so did Walter; and when the evening came, and they were all sitting together in Florence’s new room, Walter praised him in a most impassioned manner, and told Florence what he had said on leaving the house, with every graceful setting-off in the way of comment and appreciation that his own honesty and sympathy could surround it with.
Mr Toots did not return upon the next day, or the next, or for several days; and in the meanwhile Florence, without any new alarm, lived like a quiet bird in a cage, at the top of the old Instrument-maker’s house. But Florence drooped and hung her head more and more plainly, as the days went on; and the expression that had been seen in the face of the dead child, was often turned to the sky from her high window, as if it sought his angel out, on the bright shore of which he had spoken: lying on his little bed.
Florence had been weak and delicate of late, and the agitation she had undergone was not without its influences on her health. But it was no bodily illness that affected her now. She was distressed in mind; and the cause of her distress was Walter.
Interested in her, anxious for her, proud and glad to serve her, and showing all this with the enthusiasm and ardour of his character, Florence saw that he avoided her. All the long day through, he seldom approached her room. If she asked for him, he came, again for the moment as earnest and as bright as she remembered him when she was a lost child in the staring streets; but he soon became constrained – her quick affection was too watchful not to know it – and uneasy, and soon left her. Unsought, he never came, all day, between the morning and the night. When the evening closed in, he was always there, and that was her happiest time, for then she half believed that the old Walter of her childhood was not changed. But, even then, some trivial word, look, or circumstance would show her that there was an indefinable division between them which could not be passed.
And she could not but see that these revealings of a great alteration in Walter manifested themselves in despite of his utmost efforts to hide them. In his consideration for her, she thought, and in the earnestness of his desire to spare her any wound from his kind hand, he resorted to innumerable little artifices and disguises. So much the more did Florence feel the greatness of the alteration in him; so much the oftener did she weep at this estrangement of her brother.
The good Captain – her untiring, tender, ever zealous friend – saw it, too, Florence thought, and it pained him. He was less cheerful and hopeful than he had been at first, and would steal looks at her and Walter, by turns, when they were all three together of an evening, with quite a sad face.
Florence resolved, at last, to speak to Walter. She believed she knew now what the cause of his estrangement was, and she thought it would be a relief to her full heart, and would set him more at ease, if she told him she had found it out, and quite submitted to it, and did not reproach him.
It was on a certain Sunday afternoon, that Florence took this resolution. The faithful Captain, in an amazing shirt-collar, was sitting by her, reading with his spectacles on, and she asked him where Walter was.
‘I think he’s down below, my lady lass,’ returned the Captain.
‘I should like to speak to him,’ said Florence, rising hurriedly as if to go downstairs.
‘I’ll rouse him up here, Beauty,’ said the Captain, ‘in a trice.’
Thereupon the Captain, with much alacrity, shouldered his book – for he made it a point of duty to read none but very large books on a Sunday, as having a more staid appearance: and had bargained, years ago, for a prodigious volume at a book-stall, five lines of which utterly confounded him at any time, insomuch that he had not yet ascertained of what subject it treated – and withdrew. Walter soon appeared.
‘Captain Cuttle tells me, Miss Dombey,’ he eagerly began on coming in – but stopped when he saw her face.
‘You are not so well to-day. You look distressed. You have been weeping.’
He spoke so kindly, and with such a fervent tremor in his voice, that the tears gushed into her eyes at the sound of his words.
‘Walter,’ said Florence, gently, ‘I am not quite well, and I have been weeping. I want to speak to you.’
He sat down opposite to her, looking at her beautiful and innocent face; and his own turned pale, and his lips trembled.
‘You said, upon the night when I knew that you were saved – and oh! dear Walter, what I felt that night, and what I hoped! – ’
He put his trembling hand upon the table between them, and sat looking at her.
‘ – that I was changed. I was surprised to hear you say so, but I understand, now, that I am. Don’t be angry with me, Walter. I was too much overjoyed to think of it, then.’
She seemed a child to him again. It was the ingenuous, confiding, loving child he saw and heard. Not the dear woman, at whose feet he would have laid the riches of the earth.
‘You remember the last time I saw you, Walter, before you went away?’
He put his hand into his breast, and took out a little purse.
‘I have always worn it round my neck! If I had gone down in the deep, it would have been with me at the bottom of the sea.’
‘And you will wear it still, Walter, for my old sake?’
‘Until I die!’
She laid her hand on his, as fearlessly and simply, as if not a day had intervened since she gave him the little token of remembrance.
‘I am glad of that. I shall be always glad to think so, Walter. Do you recollect that a thought of this change seemed to come into our minds at the same time that evening, when we were talking together?’
‘No!’ he answered, in a wondering tone.
‘Yes, Walter. I had been the means of injuring your hopes and prospects even then. I feared to think so, then, but I know it now. If you were able, then, in your generosity, to hide from me that you knew it too, you cannot do so now, although you try as generously as before. You do. I thank you for it, Walter, deeply, truly; but you cannot succeed. You have suffered too much in your own hardships, and in those of your dearest relation, quite to overlook the innocent cause of all the peril and affliction that has befallen you. You cannot quite forget me in that character, and we can be brother and sister no longer. But, dear Walter, do not think that I complain of you in this. I might have known it – ought to have known it – but forgot it in my joy. All I hope is that you may think of me less irksomely when this feeling is no more a secret one; and all I ask is, Walter, in the name of the poor child who was your sister once, that you will not struggle with yourself, and pain yourself, for my sake, now that I know all!’
Walter had looked upon her while she said this, with a face so full of wonder and amazement, that it had room for nothing else. Now he caught up the hand that touched his, so entreatingly, and held it between his own.
‘Oh, Miss Dombey,’ he said, ‘is it possible that while I have been suffering so much, in striving with my sense of what is due to you, and must be rendered to you, I have made you suffer what your words disclose to me? Never, never, before Heaven, have I thought of you but as the single, bright, pure, blessed recollection of my boyhood and my youth. Never have I from the first, and never shall I to the last, regard your part in my life, but as something sacred, never to be lightly thought of, never to be esteemed enough, never, until death, to be forgotten. Again to see you look, and hear you speak, as you did on that night when we parted, is happiness to me that there are no words to utter; and to be loved and trusted as your brother, is the next gift I could receive and prize!’
‘Walter,’ said Florence, looking at him earnestly, but with a changing face, ‘what is that which is due to me, and must be rendered to me, at the sacrifice of all this?’
‘Respect,’ said Walter, in a low tone. ‘Reverence.’
The colour dawned in her face, and she timidly and thoughtfully withdrew her hand; still looking at him with unabated earnestness.
‘I have not a brother’s right,’ said Walter. ‘I have not a brother’s claim. I left a child. I find a woman.’
The colour overspread her face. She made a gesture as if of entreaty that he would say no more, and her face dropped upon her hands.
They were both silent for a time; she weeping.
‘I owe it to a heart so trusting, pure, and good,’ said Walter, ‘even to tear myself from it, though I rend my own. How dare I say it is my sister’s!’
She was weeping still.
‘If you had been happy; surrounded as you should be by loving and admiring friends, and by all that makes the station you were born to enviable,’ said Walter; ‘and if you had called me brother, then, in your affectionate remembrance of the past, I could have answered to the name from my distant place, with no inward assurance that I wronged your spotless truth by doing so. But here – and now!’
‘Oh thank you, thank you, Walter! Forgive my having wronged you so much. I had no one to advise me. I am quite alone.’
‘Florence!’ said Walter, passionately. ‘I am hurried on to say, what I thought, but a few moments ago, nothing could have forced from my lips. If I had been prosperous; if I had any means or hope of being one day able to restore you to a station near your own; I would have told you that there was one name you might bestow upon – me – a right above all others, to protect and cherish you – that I was worthy of in nothing but the love and honour that I bore you, and in my whole heart being yours. I would have told you that it was the only claim that you could give me to defend and guard you, which I dare accept and dare assert; but that if I had that right, I would regard it as a trust so precious and so priceless, that the undivided truth and fervour of my life would poorly acknowledge its worth.’
The head was still bent down, the tears still falling, and the bosom swelling with its sobs.
‘Dear Florence! Dearest Florence! whom I called so in my thoughts before I could consider how presumptuous and wild it was. One last time let me call you by your own dear name, and touch this gentle hand in token of your sisterly forgetfulness of what I have said.’
She raised her head, and spoke to him with such a solemn sweetness in her eyes; with such a calm, bright, placid smile shining on him through her tears; with such a low, soft tremble in her frame and voice; that the innermost chords of his heart were touched, and his sight was dim as he listened.
‘No, Walter, I cannot forget it. I would not forget it, for the world. Are you – are you very poor?’
‘I am but a wanderer,’ said Walter, ‘making voyages to live, across the sea. That is my calling now.’
‘Are you soon going away again, Walter?’
‘Very soon.’
She sat looking at him for a moment; then timidly put her trembling hand in his.
‘If you will take me for your wife, Walter, I will love you dearly. If you will let me go with you, Walter, I will go to the world’s end without fear. I can give up nothing for you – I have nothing to resign, and no one to forsake; but all my love and life shall be devoted to you, and with my last breath I will breathe your name to God if I have sense and memory left.’
He caught her to his heart, and laid her cheek against his own, and now, no more repulsed, no more forlorn, she wept indeed, upon the breast of her dear lover.
Blessed Sunday Bells, ringing so tranquilly in their entranced and happy ears! Blessed Sunday peace and quiet, harmonising with the calmness in their souls, and making holy air around them! Blessed twilight stealing on, and shading her so soothingly and gravely, as she falls asleep, like a hushed child, upon the bosom she has clung to!
Oh load of love and trustfulness that lies to lightly there! Ay, look down on the closed eyes, Walter, with a proudly tender gaze; for in all the wide wide world they seek but thee now – only thee!
The Captain remained in the little parlour until it was quite dark. He took the chair on which Walter had been sitting, and looked up at the skylight, until the day, by little and little, faded away, and the stars peeped down. He lighted a candle, lighted a pipe, smoked it out, and wondered what on earth was going on upstairs, and why they didn’t call him to tea.
Florence came to his side while he was in the height of his wonderment.
‘Ay! lady lass!’ cried the Captain. ‘Why, you and Wal’r have had a long spell o’ talk, my beauty.’
Florence put her little hand round one of the great buttons of his coat, and said, looking down into his face:
‘Dear Captain, I want to tell you something, if you please.
The Captain raised his head pretty smartly, to hear what it was. Catching by this means a more distinct view of Florence, he pushed back his chair, and himself with it, as far as they could go.
‘What! Heart’s Delight!’ cried the Captain, suddenly elated, ‘Is it that?’
‘Yes!’ said Florence, eagerly.
‘Wal’r! Husband! THAT?’ roared the Captain, tossing up his glazed hat into the skylight.
‘Yes!’ cried Florence, laughing and crying together.
The Captain immediately hugged her; and then, picking up the glazed hat and putting it on, drew her arm through his, and conducted her upstairs again; where he felt that the great joke of his life was now to be made.
‘What, Wal’r my lad!’ said the Captain, looking in at the door, with his face like an amiable warming-pan. ‘So there ain’t NO other character, ain’t there?’
He had like to have suffocated himself with this pleasantry, which he repeated at least forty times during tea; polishing his radiant face with the sleeve of his coat, and dabbing his head all over with his pocket-handkerchief, in the intervals. But he was not without a graver source of enjoyment to fall back upon, when so disposed, for he was repeatedly heard to say in an undertone, as he looked with ineffable delight at Walter and Florence:
‘Ed’ard Cuttle, my lad, you never shaped a better course in your life, than when you made that there little property over, jintly!’
