When I was 18, like all guys my age, they tried to conscript me. As a teenager, I dreamed of being a military man, I wanted to be a movie hero, participate in special operations, and if I died, then in battle, as a warrior. But over the years, I realized that something had taken me in the wrong direction, and I began to live my life to the fullest.. I evaded service in every way I knew how. But then, at the age of 22, I was still drafted into the army, an engineering regiment. I heard that lawlessness and harsh hazing were going on in the army, and I really thought that either they would kill me there, or I would go to prison because I myself would have to kill someone to save my life. I decided that I would write a diary every day and when I returned home, I would publish it. Each of you will be able to find out what the life of a conscript soldier is in Russia and in the post-Soviet space as a whole.