# The Barry Loser Series

Jim Smith

Barry Loser and the Curse of Terry Claus is a hilarious Christmas ebook from the Roald Dahl Funny Prize award-winning Barry Loser series. Perfect for young fans of Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Mr Gum and Tom Gates!When Barry discovers that his mum and dad have failed to get him a superhero Future Ratboy costume (the keelest superhero in the WORLD) he is com-per-lee-ter-ly unimpressed to say the least. In fact, Barry has had enough of Christmas – and he's not the only one. Terry Claus, Father Christmas's smelly and disgusting younger brother is out to ruin Christmas for everyone – and he's taking Barry with him!Don't miss the other books in the series: I am not a Loser, I am still not a Loser, I am so over being a Loser, I am sort of a Loser, Barry Loser and the Holiday of Doom and Barry Loser and the case of the crumpled carton Jim Smith is the keelest kids’ book spellchecker in the whole wide world amen. He is also the bestselling and Roald Dahl Funny Prize-winning author of the Barry Loser series and Future Ratboy which published in 2015. He graduated from art school with first class honours (the best you can get) and went on to create the branding for a sweet little chain of coffee shops. He also designs cards and gifts under the name Waldo Pancake. He lives in London.

# Jim Smith. Barry Loser and the Curse of Terry Claus


First published in Great Britain 2014

by Jelly Pie, an imprint of Egmont UK Ltd

The Yellow Building, 1 Nicholas Road, London W11 4AN

Text and illustration copyright © Jim Smith 2014

The moral rights of the author-illustrator have been asserted.

First e-book edition 2014

eISBN 978 1 7803 17045

barryloser.com

www.jellypiecentral.co.uk

www.egmont.co.uk

A CIP catalogue record for this title is available from the British Library

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

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## Satsuma Fronkle

It was the night before Christmas and I was standing in my sitting room, chomping on a mince pie while watching the Satsuma Fronkle advert on TV.


In the advert, Santa is going round delivering pressies to all the kiddywinkles. The only problem is, his evil brother, Terry Claus, is creeping in right after him and nicking them.

‘BOO, HOO, HOO!’ roars Terry, snatching a kiddywinkle’s stocking and climbing out the window. Except this time Santa spots him.


‘OH, HO, NO you don’t!’ cries Santa, and he wraps up his little brother like a naughty pressie and chucks him in the bin. Then Santa pulls a can of Satsuma Fronkle out of his pocket and takes a sip.


‘Mmm, nothing like an ice-cold can of Satsuma Fronkle on Christmas Eve!’ he says, and the Fronkle logo comes up.

‘Best. Fronkle. Advert. Ever,’ I said to myself, walking into the kitchen to answer the phone, which had been ringing ever since the start of the advert. ‘Hello?’ I burped down the little holes in the phone.

‘Poo, your breath stinks!’ crackled my best friend Bunky’s voice, and I imagined how keel it’d be if we all had smellyphones like they do in Future Ratboy.


Future Ratboy is mine and Bunky’s favourite TV show. It’s all about Future Ratboy and his annoying sidekick Not Bird.


‘I can’t believe it’s only one more day until I get my Future Ratboy costume!’ I shouted down the phone to Bunky.