Knave of Hearts
Caroline Anderson

www.millsandboon.co.uk

MILLS & BOON

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Table of Contents

Cover

Title Page

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

AUTHOR’S NOTE

Copyright

CHAPTER ONE

WHAT a way to spend Valentine’s Day, Anne thought wearily as she stripped off her gloves. The most romantic day of the year, and what am I doing? Inserting perineal sutures!

‘Congratulations.’ Smiling tiredly at the happy parents of a brand-new baby boy, she left them in the care of the midwife, her suturing finished.

It had been a tricky labour and she’d had to use Keilland’s forceps to turn the baby before she could deliver him safely.

Theatre had been alerted, and the locum covering for Jo Carter, Anne’s senior registrar and boss, had been contacted in case he was required.

In the event Anne had managed without any problems, and she imagined the locum had gone home.

She was wrong.

The new guy’s waiting for you in Sister’s office,’ one of the junior midwives told her.

‘Lucky you,’ her colleague said with a laugh. ‘I wish he was waiting for me!’

Anne smiled wryly. ‘Not another Casanova,’ she sighed theatrically.

The nurses tittered.

‘He’s like a cross between Superman and Dirty Harry,’ the second girl told her. ‘Just point him in my direction if you’ve got no use for him!’

Just then Sister walked out of her office and the two trainee midwives snapped to attention and faded out of the corridor like magic.

‘Ah, Dr Gabriel,’ she said. ‘All finished? Come and meet Dr Carter’s locum. I have to go and see someone in the other delivery-room, but I think it’s straightforward. I’ll call you if I need you.’ She smiled conspiratorially and lowered her voice. ‘Take your time—I gather you’re old friends.’

Anne frowned in puzzlement after the woman as she walked briskly down the corridor.

‘Old friends?’

With a shake of her head, Anne walked through the door and stopped dead in her tracks.

It couldn’t be … could it?

‘Jake …?’

‘Hello, Annie. Happy Valentine’s Day.’

The man was lounging against the window, and as she stood there he shouldered himself away from the glass and moved towards her.

He was tallish, perhaps not quite six feet, but broad and well muscled, heavier than she remembered him but with the sleek heaviness of a big cat, all controlled power and rippling masculinity. His hair was dark, almost black, and fell forwards over his brow. It was shorter than it had been—it always used to fall over his eyes, but nearly eight years could bring a lot of changes.

There were other changes, too—lines around his eyes and mouth, not just the laughter lines that had always been there but the others that came with maturity, although in his case more likely just with age. His jaw was heavily shadowed but then it always was, even when he had just shaved. It was typical of his blatant sexuality that he had always needed to shave twice a day, she remembered with painful clarity.

He reached her then, his brooding, sensual face softened by a smile that cut deep grooves into his cheeks and set his eyes alight, those warm, deep brown eyes that could see right through you and could melt the deepest recesses of your heart—if you let them.

Annie had, once—long, long ago—but never again. She turned away.

‘What are you doing here?’ she asked, her voice rough with shock.

‘I thought you’d know all about it—Jo asked me.’

Jo—of course. Jo had a thing about old friends, especially the ones who’d all lived together in their student days. She was always trying to get them together again—and Annie was always trying to avoid it. Until now she’d succeeded, but now—well, now Jake was here, just inches away from her, churning up all the old, long-buried feelings that she’d hoped she’d forgotten. Oh, God, don’t let it be true, she prayed.

But it was true. She could feel him behind her, his body almost pulsating with life and vitality, coming off him like waves and lapping round her, unsettling all her carefully created status quo and seeping through the cracks in her defences. She almost laughed. Defences? Against Jake?

‘No hug for your old friend?’ he said softly, and suddenly there was a roaring in her ears as the waves came in over her head, swamping her.

The last thing she was aware of was the strength of his arms around her and the familiar scent of his aftershave, mingled with something elementally male and definitely Jake. With a soft sigh, she sagged against him and sank slowly into blackness.

His body was hard and strong and achingly familiar, and against her ear his heart beat steadily. Anne allowed herself a couple of seconds of self-indulgence before she opened her eyes and lifted her head from his chest.

That was a very flattering welcome,’ he said gently, his eyes smiling.

Annie struggled to sit up, but his arms were still holding her and he wouldn’t let her go.

Take it steady,’ he cautioned, and then, releasing her, he eased her from his arms and stood up, leaving her on the big, soft chair in the corner of Sister’s office.

‘I’m tired,’ she said defensively. ‘I was up most of the night.’

‘So I gather—you should have called for help.’

She laughed humourlessly. ‘I’m an SHO—they’re expendable. Anyway, I didn’t know it was you.’

He met her eyes, and all the laughter was gone from his. ‘Is seeing me again really such bad news?’

Annie looked down at her hands, then back at him, making herself meet those gentle, searching eyes. ‘I’m not the person I was, Jake,’ she said slowly. ‘It’s been nearly eight years—things are different now. We aren’t at college any more, and I—I have responsibilities.’

‘Your daughter—Jo tells me she’s delightful.’

Anne looked away, unable suddenly to meet his eyes. ‘Yes—yes, she’s a real joy to me.’

Jake shifted, moving to the window to stare out at the light scattering of snow that blanketed the countryside behind the hospital.

‘Why didn’t you marry Duncan?’ he asked, his voice carefully casual.

Her heart crashed against her ribs. ‘I decided it wasn’t fair,’ she said carefully. ‘I didn’t love him the way I——’ She stopped herself in the nick of time.

‘The way you should?’

‘Yes,’ she agreed readily. ‘And it seemed unfair to a baby to have such a shaky start. My parents were very supportive.’

‘I would have married you, Annie, even though she wasn’t mine.’

She drew in a sharp breath. I must tell him, but not now, she thought frantically. Not here, in the hospital in front of anybody who walks in, and not now, out of the blue after all these years.

Sister popped her head round the door.

‘Anne, I’m sorry to disturb you but we need your help for a forceps delivery. Would you mind?’

She stood up. ‘Not at all, Sister. I’ll come right away.’

She turned to Jake. ‘Are you around later? There’s a lot to tell you. How about this evening?’

He shook his head. ‘I can’t—I’m going down to my parents’ to collect all my stuff. How about tomorrow evening?’

She thought quickly. ‘Eight?’ She could have Beth in bed by then. ‘I’m only on duty until five tomorrow, then I hand over to the other team.’

‘Fine. I’ll see you at your place—that way you won’t have to get a babysitter. What’s the address?’

‘Eight Bloomingdale Way,’ she told him.

A slow smile spread over his face. ‘Great. I’ll see you then, if not before.’

It was a long day, and an even longer night. She snatched a couple of hours to go and see Beth, who was with her childminder for the weekend as usual when Anne was on call, but for the most part her mind was on Jake and how she was going to break the news.

She didn’t see him again until Monday morning in the canteen, still in theatre greens and looking rumpled and deliciously sexy.

He came over and sat with her, and she noticed instantly that there were lines of strain around his eyes.

‘Problems?’ she asked quietly.

He shook his head. ‘Not really. I’ve just done three terminations on the trot—God, I hate it. I thought I was finished with all that.’

He must be referring to his posh New York clinic, Annie thought without compassion. She knew abortions were an unpleasant but sometimes necessary part of Obs and Gynae, but actively to seek to make money from it seemed the height of obscenity.

‘It keeps them away from the back streets,’ she said now, and he laughed without humour.

‘Oh, I know. There are pros and cons, and women in the middle fought over as if they were simply potting compost without any rights of their own, but I still hate doing it, and I hate myself for doing it, especially when it could so easily have been avoided by the simple expedient of birth control. God knows it’s readily enough available over here.’

And it wasn’t in the States? Annie stood up quickly before her tongue ran away with her. She really didn’t need to get into an argument with Jake of all people about the availability of birth control!

‘I have to go—don’t forget tonight.’

He tipped back his head, his eyes curiously intense. ‘When did I ever forget you, Annie?’ he asked softly.

Anne walked away, her legs shaking slightly. When did he forget? He’d totally ignored her for the last seven and a half years, and he didn’t even remember doing it!

It was a busy day, with several deliveries requiring her attention, but finally she got away and collected Beth from the childminder at five-thirty.

‘Can I play in the snow?’ she asked Anne.

‘Darling, it’s dark—and what about your homework?’

‘It’s only boring old reading, and I don’t want to do it—I’ll do it later.’

‘You’ll do it now,’ Anne corrected firmly.

‘No, I won’t! Jenny doesn’t make me! I hate you!’ she sobbed, and ran from the room, slamming the door behind her.

Anne took a deep breath. Of course Beth didn’t hate her, she was just crabby after the weekend. She hated her mother being on call, certainly, but she didn’t hate her mother.

Holding that thought, Anne picked up Beth’s rucksack of overnight clothes and teddies from the hall floor and followed the sound of her daughter’s sobbing up the stairs.

She found her, face down on the bed, her tear-stained face buried in the pillow.

‘Beth?’ She perched on the edge of the bed and stretched out her hand, ruffling her daughter’s thick, dark hair. ‘Baby? Talk to me.’

‘I hate you,’ came the mumbled response.

Anne sighed. ‘Did you miss me?’

‘No.’

‘I missed you. Did you play in the snow with Jenny’s children?’

A sniff was followed by a nod.

‘Did you build a snowman?’

Another nod.

She let her hand fall to Beth’s shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. ‘Why don’t you tell me all about him while we have our supper? And then we can sit in the sitting-room and read your book together before you have your bath. OK?’

Beth sniffed hard, and rolled over.

‘Can we have pizza?’

Anne groaned and rolled her eyes theatrically. ‘Again?’

Beth giggled, her tears forgotten. ‘Yes—I like pizza. Can I put the extra things on it?’

‘Oh, darling, I haven’t got any fresh vegetables and there’s nothing much in the freezer.’

‘Cheese?’ Beth suggested hopefully.

‘I think there might be some cheese. Shall we go and look?’

She stood up and held out her hand, and her daughter slid off the edge of the bed and slipped her little hand into Anne’s.

Strange, Anne thought, how comforting another person’s touch can be. They found cheese, and even a rather sorry tomato, and Beth decorated the frozen pizzas while Anne rummaged in the vegetable rack for edible potatoes. She had meant to go shopping, but Beth was so crabby and with Jake coming tonight …

She sighed and turned on the tap, and stood staring out over the little cul-de-sac. Light spilt brightly from the houses, and the street lights made gleaming pools of gold on the snow that had fallen on Saturday night. It looked enchanted, and a long way from reality, Anne thought drily.

She noticed that most of the drives were cleared, including hers—now which of her kind neighbours had done that for her? They’d even cleared the one next door, though that was pointless, because nobody lived there at the moment.

Several of the semi-detached houses, including Anne’s and its partner, belonged to the hospital and were used primarily as family accommodation for doctors moving to the area, to give them a stop-gap dwelling until they found somewhere permanent to live. The hospital had agreed to let Anne’s house to her for the duration of her SHO year in view of the fact that she had a child, and by an amazing stroke of luck the woman directly across the street from her, Jenny Harvey, was a registered childminder who had in the past looked after the children of hospital staff.

Not only was she very nice and extremely convenient, but she was also thoroughly familiar with hospital routine and quite happy to collect Beth from school with her own children and look after her at the weekend when necessary.

Anne would be lost without her, and she was well aware of that fact.

With another sigh, she picked up her vegetable knife and started peeling the rather ancient potatoes.

‘How are you doing?’ she asked Beth.

‘OK—shall I put them under the grill?’

Anne turned and looked over her shoulder. ‘Very pretty—put them on the grill pan, but let me light it.’

She dried her hands and struck a match, then fiddled with the temperamental grill until it lit with a great whoosh and settled down.

She put the pizzas under a low flame and turned back to the sink. She mustn’t complain about the cooker. Really, they were lucky to have a roof over their heads, even if they did have to pay for it. The house was functional rather than cosy, but she had done her best in her limited spare time to bring an air of homeliness to it for Beth’s sake, and they were very happy there.

It was their first home alone together, having lived previously with Anne’s parents, and she was determined to make the best of it. Her parents had offered to continue to support her, but, apart from the need to be independent, once Beth had started at school Anne knew she would find time hanging heavily on her hands.

Her house year interrupted by her pregnancy, she had moved to Edinburgh to her parents’ home and with their help had completed the second half of her house year in a local hospital before settling down to raising Beth. Now, Beth was older, and Anne had to make a life for them without help from other people. It wasn’t just a case of pride, it was a fundamental need to survive out in the open away from the loving but often suffocating support of her parents.

They had moved from Edinburgh to Norwich a year ago, and when the job had come up only thirty miles from them, it had seemed too good to be true. She could have her independence, but she needn’t be too isolated from them and Beth wouldn’t lose touch with her grandparents. Sometimes, though, when the heating played up or the grill wouldn’t light or the curtain tracks fell down, Anne wondered if it was all worth it.

Turning the temperamental grill down, she sliced the potatoes and par-boiled them before frying them in a little olive oil, telling herself that they weren’t really chips and would be good for them, although God knew there couldn’t have been much vitamin C left in the withered little offerings.

She really must get to the shops tomorrow. No wonder she had fainted in Jake’s arms—it was just the combination of a hectic schedule and a lousy diet.

Beth had laid the table, the knives and forks the wrong way round, and Anne adjusted them quickly while she wasn’t looking.

‘Pizzas are done,’ Beth announced from her station by the cooker, peering under the grill.

They ate their meagre meal quickly, and then, while the dishes soaked in the sink, they curled up together on the sofa in the little sitting-room that ran the full width of the back of the house, and Beth read her book to Anne.

The homework done, the snowman described in great detail and the tears apparently forgotten, they went upstairs and ran a bath.

While Beth splashed happily with her empty bottles and plastic toys, Anne unpacked the rucksack, hung up Beth’s uniform and found her hot-water bottle.

The heating wasn’t very efficient in the bedrooms, and as Anne tucked her daughter into bed a short while later, she reflected that all they needed to stretch her meagre resources to breaking point was a long, cold winter.

She had to pay Jenny, the rent, all her bills and feed them on a houseman’s salary, and sometimes she wondered how they would get to the end of the month. At the beginning of the month she had bought an ancient and not very reliable little car, the best she could afford, so that they could go out on her few days off and have fun and to enable her to get to the hospital and back quickly to give her more time with Beth at the beginning and end of the day.

She would hate to sell it, but if it came to that she supposed she would have to. Such as it was, it was the only luxury she had left.

Kissing Beth goodnight, she made her way downstairs and quickly washed the dishes, then tidied up the sitting-room and ran upstairs again to change.

It was seven forty-five, so there was no time for a bath before Jake arrived. Knowing Jake, he wouldn’t be late, so she wanted to be ready on time.

She opened her wardrobe doors and sighed. What could she wear? Not that it mattered, but she did want—— Silly girl. Why should it matter what impression she created? She tutted at herself, pulled a clean pair of jeans and an oversized sweater out of the drawer, and then sat down at the dressing-table and cleansed her face before reapplying her make-up.

She wore only the minimum for work, but tonight she stroked a soft, smoky green on to her lids to bring out the hazel of her eyes, and a touch of mascara to lengthen her lashes—not that she could hope to compete with Jake when it came to eyelashes.

A sudden thump from next door made her start. She glared accusingly at the dividing wall, then wiped the mascara off her cheek and peered out of the window. There was light spilling out on to the front garden, and a car on the drive—a BMW by the look of it. Must be a new consultant moved in over the weekend, she mused, and, on the way out of the room, looked at herself critically in the mirror.

Too short, too slight, her figure such as it was shot to bits by childbirth, her hair mousy, her face about as arresting as a blank wall—she turned away from the mirror in resignation, not seeing the gracefulness in her slender body, the appeal of her figure softened by maturity to a gentle womanliness, or the wistful, expressive quality of her large, green-gold eyes above her neat, delicate features framed by soft glossy hair the colour of polished hazelnuts.

Instead, convinced of her bland lack of appeal, she moved quietly through life, content to take a back seat and allow others to enjoy the limelight.

Sometimes she wondered sadly if that was all there was to be to life, but usually she was too busy to consider herself.

Tonight, though—tonight, she had to deal with Jake, and she needed a coat of armour to hide behind, never mind a dash of lipstick!

It was a few minutes before eight, and as she straightened the cushions in the sitting-room and turned up the control on the gas fire in a last vain attempt to make the bleak surroundings homely, she heard little footsteps on the stairs.

Oh, no, not now, she thought desperately.

‘Mummy?’

‘In here, darling.’

Beth’s little face appeared round the door. ‘I don’t really hate you,’ she said seriously.

‘Oh, Beth, I know you don’t!’ Anne held out her arms to her small daughter, and hugged her tight.

‘I missed you, Mummy.’

‘I know—I missed you, too. Still, it won’t be long before I don’t have to work so many weekends, and then we can be together.’

‘If it snows this weekend, can we build a snowman for my birthday?’ Beth asked, her wide eyes doubtful.

‘If it snows, then yes, of course. Now come on, you’ve got school tomorrow—run along up to bed, there’s a good girl.’

Beth lifted up her face for a kiss, and blinked.

‘You’ve got make-up on!’

Anne laughed a little awkwardly. ‘I usually have make-up on.’

Beth shook her head. ‘This is different make-up. You look—prettier.’

Anne blushed slightly.

‘Thank you, darling.’

‘Are you going out?’

She shook her head. ‘No, I’ve got a friend coming to see me——’

‘Is it Auntie Jo?’

‘No, she’s——’

‘Auntie Maggie?’

‘No, I——’

They both started slightly as a door slammed next door, and then seconds later their front doorbell rang.

‘I’ll get it!’ Beth yelled.

‘Beth, no!’ Anne wailed, but the child was already down the hall, fumbling with the catch.

Perhaps it’s the new next-door neighbours, Anne thought hopefully, but as the door swung open her worst fears were realised.

‘Oh!’ Beth said with characteristic lack of diplomacy as she eyed the big man lounging in the porch. ‘Are you Mummy’s friend? I thought you’d be a lady—Mummy doesn’t have men friends.’

Jake grinned lazily and shouldered himself away from the wall, shooting Anne a teasing glance over the child’s head. ‘Doesn’t she, now?’

‘Not usually—come in, you’ll let all the heat out and we can’t afford to heat the garden,’ Beth told him solemnly, parroting Anne’s frequent plea.

He laughed, and Beth laughed too, her head tipped back, her face alive with humour, the thick black lashes framing the dark chocolate eyes that sparkled with mischief.

And then it happened.

Jake looked at Beth, then looked again, and emotions one after the other chased across his face. Disbelief, and incredulous joy, and a terrible, fierce anger.

‘What’s your name?’ Beth asked him, her head cocked slightly to one side in a mannerism so familiar that Anne knew he would see it.

He looked across the child at her, his face still wearing a smile for Beth, but his eyes like cold steel, slashing through her.

‘Yes, aren’t you going to introduce me to your daughter?’ he said pointedly, only the slightest hint of a tremor betraying the emotions she could feel ripping through him.

She closed her eyes and counted to five.

‘Darling, this is Mr Hunter. He’s doing Auntie Jo’s work while she’s on holiday. Jake, this is—Elizabeth. We call her Beth.’

He held out his hand.

‘How do you do, Beth?’ he said gently, and a spasm crossed his face as Beth placed her hand trustingly in his and smiled.

‘How do you do, Mr Hunter?’ she echoed, and then giggled.

He almost glared at Anne above the slightly fixed smile. ‘I think Mr Hunter’s going a bit far, don’t you? I tell you what, Beth.’ He dropped to one knee conspiratorially. ‘Why don’t we make it Jake for now, eh? Since we’re going to be neighbours as well?’

‘Neighbours?’ Anne croaked.

He straightened. ‘Oh, yes. I’m going to be living in the house next door—won’t that be cosy? We’ll be able to get to know each other really well.’

Anne fled, almost dragging Beth with her up the stairs, aware with every step of Jake’s eyes boring into her spine.

‘We’re going to make a snowman at the weekend—would you like to help?’ Beth said over her shoulder.

‘My pleasure.’

Anne tugged at the reluctant hand. ‘Come on, young lady, it’s way past your bedtime. Say goodnight.’

She spent as long as she dared tucking Beth up again, but finally she had no choice.

Her heart in her mouth, she made her way downstairs.

Jake was in the sitting-room on the sofa, Beth’s latest drawing in his hands, and as she watched he straightened up and glared at her accusingly, his eyes blazing with anger and recrimination.

His voice was deadly quiet in the stillness.

‘Why the hell didn’t you tell me?’

CHAPTER TWO

ANNE’S legs were trembling, her whole body starting to shake with reaction. This wasn’t the way she had wanted him to find out!

‘I was going to tell you—tonight. That’s why I asked you here, but——’

‘Just tell me something—if we hadn’t been thrown together like this, would you ever have told me?’

She looked away, unable to bear the anger and condemnation in his eyes.

‘It isn’t that simple, Jake——’

‘Of course it is!’ he growled. ‘How much more bloody simple can it get? “You have a daughter”. Four words. Is that really so hard?’

‘Yes!’ she cried. ‘Yes, it is that hard! And what would you have done about it anyway? We were friends, Jake, just simply friends. That night was a fluke, a one-off. How could I hold you responsible? You made your feelings pretty clear, anyway. Your last words to me were, “This needn’t make any difference to us, Annie. You’re going to marry Duncan and I’m going to finish sowing my wild oats and see the world——” ‘

‘But I said——’

‘I know what you said. I know exactly what you said. We were who we were, Jake. It would never have worked.’

‘You weren’t even prepared to give it a try! Damn it, Annie, if I’d known she was mine——’

‘What? What would you have done? For God’s sake, Hunter, you were a playboy, a womanising, hell-raising, over-sexed, overgrown adolescent! You weren’t ready for the responsibility of parenthood, and I wasn’t ready to risk my daughter’s happiness—or mine—on a feckless, footloose itinerant!’

He snorted in disgust. ‘Come on, Annie, that’s a gross exaggeration——’

‘No, it isn’t! You were appalling—you had the morals of an alley-cat, Jacob Hunter! Every night there was a different victim——’

‘Rubbish! You’ve forgotten——’

‘Bull! I’ve forgotten nothing, Jake. Not one single, solitary damn second of that last year have I forgotten, and I certainly haven’t forgotten the number of nights you never even made it home——!’

She broke off, appalled that she had revealed so much.

‘Did you lie awake and wait for me, Annie?’ he asked, and beneath the softly voiced sarcasm she thought she detected a certain wistfulness.

‘Of course not,’ she denied hotly. ‘Why should I have lost sleep over you?’

He stared at her in silence for a moment, then looked away, his breath leaving his body in a sharp sigh. ‘You think a lot of me, don’t you?’

She slumped into a chair. ‘I think a hell of a lot of you, Jake. I always have done, but that doesn’t mean I’ve ever let it cloud my judgement. You were a good friend, the best, but you would have made a rotten husband and father seven years ago.’

‘And now?’

‘Now what?’

‘What kind of a husband and father would I make now, Annie? Because you can be sure of one thing—I’m not letting her go. I don’t want carefully measured visitation rights, or joint custody or some other legal arrangement. I want to be her father, in every sense of the word. I want a say in her upbringing and education, and I’m not convinced I want you out at work leaving her with a stranger for the weekend while you’re on call!’

‘Huh! And how the hell am I supposed to provide for her if I don’t go out to work?’

‘I’ll provide for her—for both of you——’

‘Over my dead body! And anyway, Jenny’s a registered childminder, not a stranger——’

‘She is to me. How do I know if I can trust her with my daughter?’

Anne glared at him. ‘She’s not your daughter, she’s my daughter. I carried her, I gave birth to her, I’ve brought her up and cared for her and made all the decisions for her while you were off seeing the world and getting married——’

‘You could have married me.’

‘Oh, yes—we’ve been through all that. You weren’t ready, Jake. Look what happened when you did get married.’

‘There was no child involved.’

‘Would it have made any difference?’

He met her eyes briefly, then looked away. ‘Probably not.’

‘You see? Just one more example of your feckless attitude to life, but Beth’s one toy you’re not going to pick up and drop—damn it, Jake, I nearly died giving birth to her! She’s mine, and I’m not going to let you have her!’

Her emotions strung to fever pitch, she turned away to hide the sudden rush of tears that cascaded down her flushed cheeks.

Jake’s hand, gentle on her shoulder, was nearly her undoing.

‘I don’t want to take her from you, Annie. I want to share her, get to know her. I want to love her, Annie, and I want her to love me, too. Don’t shut me out. I’ve lost so much of her life already—let me share her with you. Please? Marry me now, Annie—make me part of your lives.’

Her breath caught in her throat. His touch was warm, undemanding, but she knew it could change like quicksilver to become sensual and erotic, giving and yet taking, demanding, searching … Dear God, what was she thinking? She was letting herself be swayed by the soft pleading in his voice, but she could never feel like that for Jake again, could never trust him——

‘Marry you? Jake, are you mad? I wouldn’t marry you if you Were the last man on earth!’

He recoiled as if she’d struck him, walking swiftly away from her to stand broodingly at the patio doors, staring out at the dark, snow-covered garden. His hands were rammed in his pockets, his shoulder hunched defensively.

Immediately Anne regretted her impulsive outburst, but not the emotion that had triggered it. Yes, Jake was Beth’s father, but that gave him no rights over her.

‘You didn’t feel that way about me once,’ he reminded her.

‘Yes, once and only once, and look where it got me!’

He turned and met her eyes challengingly. ‘You could have had an abortion.’

‘No!’ She felt the heat drain out of her at his words. ‘Oh, no. Jake, I loved you. You were the best friend I’d ever had. How could I have killed your child?’

As she watched, the challenging anger faded from his eyes and they glazed with tears. ‘Why didn’t you tell me, Annie? I’ve missed so much …’

He bowed his head, and she watched in horror as a heavy tear slid down his cheek and splashed on to his sweatshirt, all the more shocking for being so unexpected.

She didn’t even stop to think. Her arms were round him, his head against hers, offering him wordless comfort while he struggled against the roiling tumult of his emotions.

After a while he lifted his head and tilted her chin, staring down searchingly into her eyes. His lashes, impossibly long, were spiked with tears, but his eyes were clear now, his emotions firmly back in control although his voice was gruff.

Thank you—for having her, for taking care of her, for not taking the easy way out.’

She shook her head. This was the easy way out—but not only that, for me it was the only way. Don’t thank me. I didn’t do it for you.’

‘I’m thanking you for my daughter,’ he reminded her softly, and then with a sigh he pulled her close again. ‘You said you nearly died …’

She nodded. ‘It was awful. Really she’s lucky to be alive. She was an awkward presentation, and I just didn’t have the pelvic capacity to cope with it.’

Jake led her to the sofa and sat, his arm still round her, while she told him about the fight to bring his daughter into the world.

‘Why didn’t they do a section?’ he asked in bewilderment. ‘Surely they could see you’re too tiny to deliver anything but a straightforward presentation?’

She shrugged. ‘It was a young doctor, and he kept saying she’d turn any minute. I knew he was wrong, I’d done my obstetrics, but you’re very vulnerable lying there, and you don’t feel like arguing. In the end I was too weak to argue, and then he called the consultant and they got her out in the nick of time. It’s a miracle she isn’t brain-damaged.’

‘Don’t,’ he groaned, and hugged her hard against his side. ‘Oh, Annie, love, I’m sorry. I should have been there.’

She laughed, a little shakily. ‘I’m glad you weren’t—you would have killed him!’

Jake chuckled. ‘Probably.’ He tipped her chin up with his fingers, and looked searchingly into her eyes. ‘Poor darling,’ he murmured, and then his mouth found hers, his lips soft and undemanding, his kiss a gift of devastating tenderness that brought a sigh to her lips.

Her body felt like liquid, melting against him as he deepened the kiss. She had missed him—oh, how she had missed him, but it had never been like this. Apart from that one wild, unforgettable night there had been only hugs and kisses of friendship, but this—there was something so right about it that it didn’t occur to Anne to stop him.

Gradually the pressure increased as the kiss became more demanding, and Jake eased her down until she was stretched out on the sofa, his body pressing against hers so she could feel the hard imprint of his desire.

With a moan of frustration she arched against him, and he lifted his head and stared down at her, his eyes almost black with passion.

‘What about Beth?’ he asked, his voice roughened with need.

‘What about her?’ Annie asked absently, her eyes locked with his, drowning in the deep, peaty pools that mirrored her own desire.

He laughed softly. ‘I’d hate her to come down and catch us—is there a lock on your bedroom door?’

‘Bedroom?’ she echoed stupidly, then suddenly reality came crashing back and she pushed ineffectually at Jake’s solid chest.

‘Dear God, what are we doing? Jake, let me up.’

He stared at her in disbelief for a second, and then with an untidy sigh he eased away from her and let her go.

She sprang off the sofa, her arms hugged around her waist, her whole body trembling. Dear heaven, what on earth was she thinking about to let things get so out of hand? And it wasn’t as if she could avoid him—he’d made it perfectly clear he was going to be part of her life as long as Beth was at home. That meant ten or fifteen years of his constant presence, countless hours of discussion over Beth’s upbringing and the direction of her life, and there was no way she could cope with that and an affair with Jake into the bargain.

Because that was all it would be. She knew him well enough to know that he was never satisfied for long with a woman, and that as soon as one had succumbed to his undoubted charm another would take her place.

No, life would be untidy enough without her own emotions torn to shreds by his devil-may-care attitude to sexual relationships.

‘Come and sit down, Annie. I won’t bite you.’

She laughed shakily. “It’s not your teeth I’m afraid of, Jake.’

‘What is it, then? I won’t hurt you, darling. Come here—I only want to talk.’

She hugged herself tighter and stared out of the window. ‘You weren’t talking just now.’

She could see him reflected in the glass, stretched out full length on the sofa, one arm bent, propping his head. He looked lazy and relaxed, like a big cat, and like a cat he was watching her steadily.

He came to his feet in one easy, graceful movement and came to stand behind her, his eyes never leaving the reflection of hers.

‘What’s the matter, Annie?’

She closed her eyes as he laid his hands on her shoulders and eased her back against him. ‘Jake, we mustn’t …’

‘Why?’ His voice was softly persuasive, his breath warm against her cheek. ‘What harm can it do? I meant what I said, Annie. I want to marry you, and adopt my daughter, and look after you both.’

‘No!’ She pulled away from the warm haven of his arms and crossed the room, turning to face him like a cornered animal at bay. ‘Jake, I meant what I said, too. I won’t marry you——’

‘You said you love me.’

‘Loved—a long time ago, when I was just a foolish girl, but that girl’s long gone, Jake. I’m a woman now, and I know what I want and need, and it isn’t you.’

His brows quirked. ‘Are you sure? That’s not the message I was getting a few minutes ago.’

‘Well, it’s the message you’re getting now, and that’s the message you’re going to continue to get.’

He laughed softly. ‘Is that a challenge?’

‘Challenge?’ she scoffed. ‘Jake, I live a celibate life. I wouldn’t be much of a challenge to a man of your undoubted sexual prowess——’

‘You’re exaggerating again—flattering though it is, I ought to draw your attention to the fact that there have been precious few women in my life in recent years.’

She laughed. ‘I’m sure it’s like riding a bicycle, Jake, and let’s face it, you devoted the majority of your youth to honing your skills in that department.’

‘You’re wrong, Annie, but I can’t be bothered to argue.’

‘Well, there’s a relief!’ She sat down in a chair and curled her feet defensively under her bottom. ‘Look, I don’t want to fight with you. We have to find some way of being together peaceably so that you can get to know Beth——’

‘So you at least agree I should?’

She was shocked. ‘Of course! I’d always intended to tell you about her, but somehow it never seemed the right time.’

He gave a soft grunt of laughter, and dropped back on to the sofa, sprawling out across it with one leg flung up on the cushions, one arm bent, head propped on his fist. His jeans, as always almost indecently tight, were stretched lovingly over his thighs, accentuating the power of his legs and blatantly outlining his masculinity.

She looked away.

‘So where do we go from here, Annie?’ he asked quietly. ‘You seem to want to make the rules. What do you suggest?’

She shrugged, unsure of how to proceed. ‘Play it by ear? You’ll be living next door, so you should be able to have lots of casual chats with her and gradually make friends. Drop in for tea, invite us round for coffee, perhaps the odd walk at the weekend? She wants you to help her build the snowman, too.’

He was watching her again with that curiously intense look that was so unnerving.

‘You are, I take it, including yourself in these arangements?’

‘Of course—I have to, Jake! I can’t just suddenly encourage her to spend hours with you without any reason. Normally I try and stop her from wearing out her welcome with friends, because she’s very open and natural and can’t imagine that anybody wouldn’t want her.’

‘I want her. Make no mistake about that, Annie.’

Her shoulders sagged. ‘Just one thing, because remember I know you, Jacob Hunter. Don’t encourage her affections and friendship and then decide paternity is too boring and fly off into the sunset. Do you understand? I don’t care how you behave with your women, this is a different relationship, and, like it or not, it’s for life. If you don’t think you can hack it, then get out of our lives now. I won’t have her hurt—is that clear?’

‘As crystal.’ He came fluidly to his feet and stood over her menacingly, his voice deathly quiet. ‘There’s one thing you should understand. I intend to be an active parent, Anne. She’s my daughter and before long she’s going to know she’s my daughter——’

‘No!’

‘Yes. Oh, yes. I’m not having her calling me Mr Hunter or Uncle Jake. I want her to know who I am, and that I love her.’

‘But you don’t!’

‘Because I’ve never had the chance, but that’s all changed now, because you’re going to give me that chance. I want to know everything—when she cut her first tooth, took her first step, said her first word—all of it, down to the last sleepless night, and you’re going to tell me if I have to wring it out of you!’

‘That won’t be necessary. I have a book,’ she told him quietly. ‘I knew you would want to know one day, so I recorded everything meticulously. I’ll get it for you. There are also videos of her as a toddler, and in the playgroup Christmas concert, and later in school plays and up at my parents’ during holidays. Do you have a video player?’

He nodded. ‘Yes, I brought it up last night.’

She rummaged in the cabinet under the television and brought out three video tapes, and then from the bookcase she produced a baby album and six other photo albums.

‘One for every year,’ she told him. The last one has a few more to go in it.’

‘It must be her birthday soon, I suppose—God, I don’t even know the date of my own daughter’s birthday!’ he said heavily.

‘Sunday,’ she told him, ignoring the anguish in his voice. ‘The twenty-first of February.’

She produced a carrier bag from the kitchen and put all the tapes and albums in it.

‘What have you told her about me?’ he asked.

‘I told her you’d gone away to America. By the time she was old enough to ask, you were married and in private practice, so we could hardly write to you and say, “There’s something you ought to know”.’

‘And when you heard I was divorced?’

She shrugged. ‘It just proved everything I’d always known about you and your relationships with women. I decided then that I didn’t need the aggravation of telling you about Beth and having to deal with transatlantic flights and custody and access battles and all the other trauma. Frankly, Jake, we were better off without you.’

He glanced around at the meagre surroundings, and she felt his disdain for the marked walls, the threadbare carpet, the tatty old furniture.

‘Pretty spartan, Annie. I wouldn’t say you’d done that well.’

She was stung, her pride hurt. ‘I’ve done my best, and there’s more to life than money, Jake, odd though you may find that coming hot-foot from the Big Apple—or should I call it the Golden Nugget?’

He opened his mouth to argue, and then shut it with a snap. Taking the carrier bag from her, he strode down the hall and flung open the front door.

‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’

He stepped out into the night, and as she moved to push the door to behind him, he slapped it back against the wall and spun to face her.

‘Incidentally, about that piece of scrap iron on the drive …’he gritted furiously.

She frowned in confusion. ‘Scrap iron? You mean my car——?’

‘Car?’ he snorted. ‘It’s a wreck! The first thing I’m doing is buying you a decent one, because there’s no way my daughter’s riding round in that ancient death-trap!’

Anne was furious. First the house, now the car! ‘How dare you? Just where the hell do you get off calling my car a death-trap?’

‘Look at it! The thing’s lethal—if it has an MOT certificate I’d stake my life it’s cooked. You’ve got no business taking a child in a vehicle like that——’

‘How dare you? It’s none of your business what I do with Beth——’

‘Rubbish!’ he roared. ‘Of course it’s my business! She’s my daughter, damn it!’

‘No, she isn’t!’ Anne screamed, almost beyond endurance. ‘She’s my daughter, and I won’t have you interfering—what are you doing?’

She ran after him, holding his arm as he wrenched open the driver’s door and pulled the bonnet catch.

‘Jake, what the bloody hell do you think you’re playing at?’

‘Disabling it is what I’m playing at. If you won’t be responsible, then I’ll have to be responsible for you.’ He opened the bonnet, undipped the distributor cap and pocketed the rotor arm.

‘Damn you, give that back!’ she shouted.

‘No.’ He slammed the bonnet, and lights came on all round the quiet little street.

‘What’s going on out there?’ someone called.

‘Damn it, Jake, give it back!’ she pleaded.

‘Anne, are you all right?’

That was Jenny’s husband, out in the snow in dressing-gown and slippers with a torch in his hand.

‘I’m fine, Phil. Just a silly joke. Sorry to disturb you,’ and then in an undertone, ‘Jake, please, be reasonable!’

‘No. Evening!’ he called to Phil, then, turning on his heel, he scrunched over the snow to his front door.

‘Goodnight, you little hell-cat. I’ll give you a lift to work in the morning. Be ready at eight.’

The door banged behind him, and Anne was left standing foolishly in the front garden in bare feet, suddenly desperately conscious of all the hidden eyes watching her from round the street.

‘Sure you’re OK?’ Phil asked from the safety of his front door.

She nodded. ‘I’m fine. Sorry!’

She closed the door behind her and sagged against the wall.

What a scene! How was she going to face all those people the next day? It was all right for Jake, he never had cared what people thought of him, but she had to live here and the way he was carrying on she wouldn’t be able to!

Oh, damn you, Hunter, she thought bitterly. Why did you have to turn up and throw everything into confusion?

She went into the sitting-room and warmed her feet in front of the fire, then straightened the cushions, made herself a cup of tea and took it up to bed, realising as she did so that she hadn’t offered him so much as a glass of cold water in the three hours or so he had been there.

Sighing heavily, she prepared for bed, checked Beth and slipped between the cold sheets with a shudder.

She could have been warm, of course, if she’d let Jake stay—but what kind of an option was that? She punched the pillows into shape and sat up, cradling her tea in her hands and wondering how she was going to cope with having Jake as a next-door neighbour.

Not well, was the answer.

She could hear him moving about in the house, and after she had drunk her tea she lay down and tried to sleep, but her ears were straining for the sound of his movements on the other side of the wall.

After an age he came to bed, in the room that adjoined hers, his headboard against hers so that if she could have put her hand through the wall she could have touched him.

The thought unsettled her, and she turned over, punching her pillow viciously.

‘Having trouble sleeping, Annie?’ he asked mockingly. That’s what comes of having secrets.’

Damn you, she thought heatedly, but her soft heart went out to him. He might be the most awful rake God ever frowned on, but she loved him, and just now he must be hurting.

‘Goodnight, Jake,’ she said quietly.

‘Goodnight, Annie. See you in the morning. Oh, and Annie? Don’t think you’re going to win. I get what I want in the end, and make no mistake, I want you.’

‘I want you’. Three simple words, yet they had the power to ruin her entire night’s sleep!

It seemed she had hardly dozed off before she heard a knocking on the wall.

‘Rise and shine, sweetheart—seven-thirty!’

‘Go away,’ she mumbled, and through the wall she heard his soft laughter.

‘Not a morning person, are you, my darling?’

‘I’m not your darling!’ she said clearly, and, throwing back the bedclothes, she stumbled out into the frigid air.

Beth was still fast asleep, her dark lashes heavy on her softly flushed cheeks. Anne reached out a hand and stroked her hair back tenderly.

‘Beth? Wake up, sleepyhead.’

The impossible lashes fluttered and lifted, and Beth smiled and stretched sleepily.

‘Hello,’ she said through a yawn, and Anne hugged her.

‘Hello, darling. Time to get up now.’

She rummaged in the drawers for some clean underwear, and laid it on the bed with Beth’s uniform. ‘Here you are, darling. Get dressed quickly, there’s a good girl, and I’ll see what I can find for breakfast.’

Anne washed hastily in the chilly bathroom, scrubbed her teeth, and then rummaged for her own clothes.

It was time to get out the ancient twin-tub again and battle with the laundry, she thought with a sigh. There was no chance it would dry outside with the weather as cold as it was, which meant either a trip to the launderette or having everything hanging around the house on airers for days on end.

And there was no food in the house.

She went down to the kitchen and looked in the cupboards, like old Mother Hubbard.

Cereal, but not enough milk to go on it. Sunflower spread, but no bread. Porridge oats, but Beth wouldn’t eat porridge without syrup, and guess what?

The doorbell pealed, shockingly loud in the stillness.

She heard Beth throw herself down the stairs.

‘I’ll get it!’

Anne shook her head and went out into the hall.

‘Hi, Jake!’ Beth said with a grin. ‘Come in!’

He ruffled her hair, and looked over her head to Anne.

‘Morning, ladies. I brought some hot doughnuts—I’m sure you hate them and would much rather have toast, but perhaps you’ll help me eat them up?’

‘Ye-es!’ Beth positively bounced on the spot, her eyes alight.

Anne was irritated. ‘I know I said invite yourself round,’ she hissed while Beth was preoccupied with the baker’s bag, ‘but I never mentioned breakfast!’

‘Seven,’ Beth said, and then screwed up her face. ‘Two each—who gets three?’

‘I do,’ Jake told her, and poked his tongue out.

‘Don’t teach her things like that,’ Anne snapped.

Beth giggled. ‘That’s very rude, you shouldn’t do it!’

He pretended to look chastened while Anne found three plates and set them down at the rickety table.

‘Coffee?’ he suggested.

‘It’ll have to be black. Beth, do you mind squash?’

She shook her head. ‘Are we going shopping today? There’s never any food here.’

Anne could have ground her teeth with annoyance.

‘That’s not strictly true,’ she said defensively, but Jake leant back in his chair, sank his teeth right into the jammy middle of his doughnut and smiled with evident delight.

‘I’ll take you shopping,’ he offered, and before she could stop herself Anne told him not to talk with his mouth full.

He choked with laughter, and Beth banged him on the back until he got his breath back and caught her wrists, tugging her on to his lap.

‘Enough already!’ he said, still laughing. ‘You’ll break my ribs!’

She giggled, reached across the table and picked up her doughnut, quite content to stay on his lap.

Over her head, Anne met his eyes, and the depth of emotion in them brought a lump to her throat.

She sipped her coffee and stole another glance. They were so alike! Not just in looks, although to see them together there was no mistaking their relationship, but in personality too. Fun-loving, with an overdeveloped sense of the ridiculous, always quick to laugh and ready to forgive—without Beth to take his place, Anne wondered how much more she would have missed him in the last seven years.

She stood up and cleared her throat. ‘We ought to get on,’ she said. ‘It’s almost time to drop Beth at Jenny’s, and we have to be at the hospital soon.’

He left them then, and they had a last mad scramble round for satchel and reading book and gloves before they were ready to walk out of the door.

He was waiting for them, his breath misting on the cold air, lounging against his car in a thick leather jacket. Anne tugged her coat closer round her and forced a smile.

‘I’ll just drop Beth off with Jenny, and I’ll be with you.’

‘Hurry up, then, you’re on the drag,’ he pointed out needlessly.

She stifled her retort until she had delivered Beth safely across the road, fielded Jenny’s intense curiosity and installed herself in the front of Jake’s car beside him. Then she turned on him and pointed out with icy calm that it was he who had delayed them at breakfast, and if he hadn’t stolen a piece of her car he wouldn’t be obliged to give her a lift anyway!

He didn’t bother to reply, concentrating instead on guiding the car over the icy roads.

It was only when he had parked and she got out rather too fast that she realised the road was just a sheet of ice.

‘Are you all right?’ he asked as she picked herself up.

‘Fine. Do you mind if I don’t thank you for the lift?’

He stifled the grin hastily. ‘My pleasure,’ he replied easily, and, taking her arm, he led her to the gritted path.

Once there and safe, she snatched her arm away ungraciously and, head up, marched to the entrance without looking back.

He followed her, his footsteps scrunching on the grit. They parted company at the entrance to the wards, he to Gynae, she to Obstetrics.

‘Coffee later?’

‘I should be so lucky,’ she muttered.

He shrugged. ‘OK. I’ll see you.’

As it happened she did manage a coffee break, but, as luck would have it, so did Jake and they arrived together at the canteen.

‘Wonders will never cease,’ he said teasingly as he joined her in the queue. ‘Two coffees, please.’

He paid for hers, dismissing her protest, and picked up both cups, scanning the room.

‘Ah, there’s Maggie—let’s go and say hello.’

Anne was startled. ‘How do you know Maggie?’

‘Met her at Jo’s.’

Did everybody but her know about Jake coming? She looked across the room at her friend, and then blinked. She was sitting on an armless easy chair, but not alone. A tall, blond man with drop-dead good looks was sharing it with her, his arm possessively round her shoulders, and they both looked like they’d won the pools.

‘Hello, Maggie, nice to see you again,’ Jake was saying, and pulled up two chairs. ‘Is there a reason for the overcrowding?’ he asked mildly, his eyes twinkling.

Maggie laughed, her soft pansy-blue eyes filled with happiness.

‘We happen to like it,’ her companion said with a wicked grin, and stuck out his hand. ‘Ben Bradshaw, A and E.’

‘Jake Hunter … I’m covering for Jo Harding—sorry, Carter. I’ve known her a long time; it’ll take me a while to get used to the change. Jo and Annie and I go back—oh, eleven years?’

Annie nodded. ‘Something like that.’ She eyed Maggie and Ben suspiciously, but she had no intention of asking what she wanted to ask in public. The last time she’d seen Maggie, she’d been breaking her heart because Ben was getting married—in fact, he should have done so last Saturday, so why was Maggie sitting so close to him now that she was getting pressure sores?

Then she saw the ring.

‘Catching flies?’ Jake murmured, but she ignored him.

‘Would someone care to tell me what’s going on?’ she asked.

Maggie tried to hide her smile. ‘Fancy coming to a wedding on Saturday week?’

‘But I thought …’

The smile broke out regardless. ‘So did I, but I was wrong.’

Annie shook her head. ‘Would you run that by me again?’ she said plaintively.

Maggie laughed delightedly. ‘You know I overheard Ben and Jan planning a wedding?’

‘Yes?’

‘Jan’s his stepsister. She got married on Saturday.’

‘But not to Ben?’

Maggie shook her head.

‘So the ship’s rat’s not a rat at all?’

‘Ship’s rat?’ Ben said indignantly.

Anne blushed. ‘Sorry, just a figure of speech—Jo’s, actually.’

Jake laughed. ‘I’m not sure I quite understand what’s going on, but do I take it that congratulations are in order?’

Ben chuckled. ‘Yes, thank God. I never want to go through a time like that again. It took me five minutes to fall for her, and then another five weeks to persuade her to marry me—that’s when I could finally get her to listen.’

Jake gave a wry snort of amusement. ‘Is that all? You want to try courting Annie—after eleven years she still won’t marry me, even though she knows how wonderfully easy I am to live with,’ he said mournfully.

‘You jest!’ Anne retorted.

Maggie was wide-eyed. ‘You lived with him?’ she said incredulously.

‘Not precisely,’ Anne mumbled.

‘Yes, you did—precisely. You just wouldn’t marry me.’

She glared at Jake, and he shrugged and smiled.

Ben shook his head. ‘Must be something wrong with your technique, old man.’

‘After all the practice he got in? No chance,’ Anne said drily, and then blushed furiously at the others’ laughter.

She was rescued by the sudden bleeping of her pager.

‘Saved by the bell,’ Jake said with another chuckle, and, with a mumbled excuse, she fled.

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