# Back to Me

Earl Sewell

This is not how Maya Rogers hoped to get famous.First her boyfriend, Misalo, dumps her, and then the revealing photos that she sent to him go viral. Maya's reputation is in shreds, and now she's getting all the wrong kind of attention from guys in her neighborhood. How did life get so out of control so fast? One answer: Viviana. Maya and her cousin were close once. But guilty secrets and long-buried resentments changed all that.Viviana wants to make Maya miserable by stealing away Misalo, but she may be stirring up more trouble than anyone can handle. At least Maya knows that her best friend Keysha always has her back. But with so much bad blood flowing, will these family ties be severed for good?

With family like this, who needs enemies?

This is not how Maya Rogers hoped to get famous. First her boyfriend, Misalo, dumps her, and then the revealing photos that she sent to him go viral. Maya’s reputation is in shreds, and now she’s getting all the wrong kind of attention from guys in her neighborhood. How did life get so out of control so fast?

One answer: Viviana. Maya and her cousin were close once. But guilty secrets and long-buried resentments changed all that. Viviana wants to make Maya miserable by stealing away Misalo, but she may be stirring up more trouble than anyone can handle. At least Maya knows that her best friend Keysha always has her back. But with so much bad blood flowing, will these family ties be severed for good?

Back to Me

Earl Sewell


www.millsandboon.co.uk

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Acknowledgments

I want to say thank you to the following people for all their help with my endless questions.

To my editor, Glenda Howard, who has stood with me and who has been a champion of my career and this new series from the beginning. Thank you so much for your belief in my work and talent.

I have to send out an extra-special thank-you to Dr. Marcia Brevard Wynn. Thank you for all the encouragement and guidance you’ve given me. Your philosophy and thought-provoking insights on life and happiness have inspired me beyond words. You’re truly one of a kind, but I’m certain you already know that.

To Lauren Wynn, for taking the time out of your busy social schedule to read every teen book I’ve written and provide me with your feedback, comments and suggestions. They were truly helpful.

To Taryn Kingery, librarian, the Ralph Ellison Library, Oklahoma City, Megan Murray Cusick, Nancy B. Jefferson Alternative School. Thank you both for sharing my work and for encouraging young people to read. The world truly needs more people like you.

To my daughter Candice, I love you more than words can express. And to Ms. Jan Washington, thanks for the great brownie recipe.

To all who have discovered my teen titles and have either shared them with or recommended them to young readers, thank you so much for helping me spread the word.

Please feel free to drop me a line at earl@earlsewell.com. Please put the title of my book in the subject line so that I know your message is not spam. Make sure you check out www.earlsewell.net and www.myspace.com/earlsewell. You can also hit me up on Facebook and Twitter. Just type in my name and you should be able to find me with little difficulty.

“Revenge only engenders violence, not clarity and true peace.

I think liberation must come from within.”

—Sandra Cisneros

Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

One

VIVIANA

My cousin Anna had the height and the natural stride of a model. She was slimmer than most girls, and if you asked me, she had the beauty and personality that could land her on the covers of magazines. Anna and I were goofing around. She was trying on various outfits and pretending to walk a runway like Tyra Banks and Adriana Lima. I was playing music for her as she strutted back and forth. Anna then asked me to join her private fashion show, but neither one of us could stop laughing long enough to walk from one end of the bedroom to the other. We decided to have more fun by dancing. Anna set up her webcam so we could post videos of our foolishness on YouTube and some popular social networks. What I didn’t realize was that in addition to being very pretty, Anna could dance. If I were her manager, I’d enter her in a reality television dance contest. Seriously, she had some moves that left my mouth wide open.

“Oh, girl. You are tripping. You should be getting paid for dancing the way you do,” I said, feeling envious of how well she moved.

“I’m just flexible, that’s all,” Anna said as she got up and moved toward her dresser drawer.

“Didn’t you used to take dance lessons when you were little?” I asked, vaguely recalling hearing Grandmother Esmeralda praising one of her performances.

“That was years ago, when I was a little girl. Mom had me in ballet class and modeling classes. I wasn’t very good at ballet, so I tried modern dance, which was more fun. All of the dancing made me look more muscular, which my modeling coach at the time said was unacceptable. I stopped doing that stuff when I was around eleven.”

“Why did you stop?” I was curious.

“I was forced to choose between dancing and modeling, and I couldn’t, because I enjoyed both equally,” said Anna as she removed a purple belly dancer’s hip scarf from the top dresser drawer.

“What the heck is this?” I said louder than I intended to as I reached out to touch the silky fabric.

“Mom and I took a beginner’s belly dance class last year,” Anna explained. “It was only four classes, but I learned a lot and it was fun.”

Anna tied the scarf around her hips. She looked very cute in it. She reset her webcam, put on song by Shakira called “Hips Don’t Lie,” and right before my eyes she began working her hips just like the singer. She rocked those bad boys like a belly dancer, and the movements she did with her torso were nothing short of mesmerizing. About the only thing I could really do well was make my booty bounce. When Anna was done, she posted her video for the world to see.

“You have to teach me how to dance like that.” I was practically begging her.

“Sure. It’s really easy, and I’m sure you can make it look far sexier than I can,” Anna said.

“You’re doing it in the sexy dancing department if you ask me.” I chuckled.

“Then why was Carlo more interested in Maya than me?” she asked.

“Because he was stupid, and the last thing you want is a stupid boyfriend,” I assured her.

Anna laughed. “You’re right. Come stand next to me and I’ll show you how to do some hip snaps.”

“Hip snaps?” I asked, because it sounded painful.

“Yes, like this.” Anna demonstrated the move, and the coins on her hip scarf shimmied and jingled.

“That move is so hot,” I said as I moved closer to her and tried. I knew I looked silly, because my hips wouldn’t snap the way Anna’s had.

“No. You have to bend your knees like this, tuck your pelvis forward, squeeze your butt and then shift from one hip to the other,” Anna instructed.

I did the move right twice but felt as if something got dislocated. “Oh, my God. I think I broke my hip,” I said.

“No, you didn’t. Your body is just not used to moving in that way,” she said and encouraged me to keep trying. Anna and I were having a blast dancing, posting videos and being obnoxious. We were in the middle of dancing when Anna’s older sister, Maya, entered the room unannounced.

“It’s one-thirty in the morning. Why are you guys up so late?” Maya asked.

“We’re having a party and you’re not invited,” Anna said.

“I wouldn’t party with your bony behind, anyway.” I could tell right away that Maya had caught an immediate attitude.

Anna shook her hips and rattled the coins in Maya’s direction as a sign of defiance.

“You know, Anna, for someone who almost died recently, don’t you think you’re overdoing it a bit?” Maya asked.

“No, she isn’t,” I said. “She is only showing me how to dance, Maya. Do you have a problem with that?” I asked.

“I have a problem with everything. Especially you, Viviana.” Maya was kick-starting some drama.

I was happy that Anna was back home from the hospital and doing well. I still couldn’t believe she’d accidentally ingested crystal meth. Seeing her lying in a hospital bed with tubes and needles connected to her arms wasn’t a nice experience. I thought for sure she was going to die and I’d get blamed for it. I was just so glad that didn’t happen. Besides, I didn’t know what I’d do if my favorite cousin wasn’t around. I loved my cousin Anna but totally hated her sister, Maya. Anna was so much easier to get along with. She didn’t judge me or treat me as if I was beneath her the way Maya did.

“Don’t come in here taking out your anger on us because Misalo has dumped you,” I snapped back at her. I wasn’t about to let her nasty comment go unanswered.

“I’m not taking anything out on you guys. All I’m asking is for you to be quieter. I’m trying to get some rest.” Maya tried to come off as if she wasn’t trying to be confrontational, but I knew better.

“Anna, you don’t have to listen to her. We are not being loud,” I said.

Maya decided to play dirty. “Do you guys want me to get Mom involved? Because I can.”

“Fine, Maya. We’ll keep it down.” Anna gave in to her sister.

“Thank you,” Maya said and paused briefly. “By the way, it is good to see you up and moving around again,” she said as she exited the room and shut the door.

“That girl needs to get a life,” I grumbled. “I don’t see how you can stand living with her.”

“Maya is just Maya. She always feels like she has to be the mature one,” Anna explained.

“Well, she should try being a kid sometimes. I mean, seriously. She could’ve come in here and asked if she could join us and had fun being silly,” I said.

“That’s not Maya,” Anna said as she selected another song for us to dance to. She turned down the volume and began shimmying her hips again when the music began. I watched as Anna lost herself in the rhythm of the music.

“Come on. Stop pouting and dance with me,” Anna said, snapping me out of my daydream.

I smiled, rose to my feet and joined her.

* * *

The following morning I was sitting at the kitchen table, eating breakfast with Aunt Raven, Maya and Anna. Uncle Herman was at a friend’s house, helping out with some type of home-improvement project. I was enjoying the buttermilk pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausage links and hash browns Aunt Raven had prepared. I really didn’t have anything exciting planned for my day, with the exception of just hanging out and doing whatever. Living in the suburbs was so much different than living in the city. The suburbs were totally boring. I just didn’t see how people functioned when there was absolutely nothing going on. At least in the city there was always something to enjoy—a block party, a festival or a barbecue—and if nothing like that was going on, you could always just hang out on the street, where it was guaranteed that something would come up. Heck, out here I couldn’t even get away and walk along the lakefront, something I enjoyed doing when I was staying with my mom and her trifling boyfriend.

“So, Viviana, how well were you doing in school?” asked Aunt Raven. The question came out of nowhere and caused me to stop chewing my food and glare at her.

“What do you mean?” I asked as I swallowed my food. I wasn’t sure what she wanted to know.

“Well, you and Maya are the same age. What high school were you attending?” she asked, rephrasing her question.

“Why?” I didn’t understand why she even cared to know that information.

“Well, you’ve been staying with us for a few weeks, and since it looks like you’ll be staying here for a while longer, I have to see what I can do about getting you registered at Thornwood. You may luck out and get to take some classes with Maya,” she said. Obviously, Maya and I were hiding our disdain for each other very well.

“Can we talk about this later? School is a rather touchy subject for me,” I said, wanting her to drop the conversation.

“No. I feel that this is an appropriate time to discuss this. You have nothing to be ashamed of,” she assured me.

At that moment, I wanted to push away from the table and storm out of the room, but I knew that wouldn’t go over very well with my aunt.

“Seriously, can’t we just talk about this issue later?” I tried pleading with her in hopes she’d catch my drift.

“What is wrong with you, Viviana? It’s just a simple question,” my aunt said, pressing the issue.

“Yeah, Viviana. I’d also like to know what school you went to,” Maya interjected. “Were you on the cheerleading squad? No. Scratch that question. You don’t look like the cheerleading type. Maybe you were on the school dance team? You seem to know how to dance like a—”

Aunt Raven cut her off before she finished. “Maya!”

“What? I was going to say like a trained professional,” Maya smirked. I could tell from her condescending grin that her comment was loaded with sarcasm.

“Now, Viviana, what’s the name of the school where you were last registered?” Aunt Raven wasn’t going to let our conversation rest. I really didn’t want to tell her, because I was carrying a secret I was certain she’d find inexcusable.

“Roberto Clemente,” I answered, not wanting to offer any more information than necessary.

“So, you should’ve finished your junior year, right?” My aunt had asked the question that I had hoped she wouldn’t. I stopped eating my food and exhaled loudly. I shot my eyes over at Maya, who was glaring at me as if she were trying to read my thoughts. When I didn’t answer, she made her own assumptions.

“OMG,” Maya blurted out.

Startled, Aunt Raven asked, “What?”

“Mom, isn’t it obvious? She didn’t finish her junior year.” Miss Know-It-All Maya Rogers pointed her shameful finger at me. I wanted to rip it off and shove it up her nose until it came out of her eye socket.

“You shouldn’t talk about things you don’t know about!” I snapped.

“Wait a minute. There is no need to argue or get nasty with each other. Viviana Anita Vargas, is what Maya said true?” My aunt had called me by my full name. I took my eyes off of Maya and cut them over to Aunt Raven.

“No,” I answered her.

“Good. I’ll look up the address of the school and request a copy of your transcript. I’ll have to figure out how I’ll explain to them that I’m your current guardian.”

“I haven’t been there in a long time. They probably don’t have it anymore,” I said, hoping that the administrators and teachers had completely forgotten about me.

“It’s because you’ve been on summer vacation, right?” asked Anna.

I glanced at her briefly before lowering my eyes with humility. Embarrassment began swelling in my heart like the sun rising in the morning. I felt as if I were being judged.

“Viviana, hold your head up and stop slouching. There is no need to look as if someone has beaten the life out of you,” said Aunt Raven.

“I didn’t attend school for most of my junior year. I haven’t earned the credits needed to pass, okay? Are you guys happy now? I said it!” It was very hard for me to admit that. It was an awful burden weighing on my heart.

“That explains a lot,” Maya remarked and snickered.

My humiliation immediately evaporated. I wanted to reach across the table and scratch up her face like a dog digging a hole in the backyard. I slammed my hand against the table and rose to my feet. I was ready to leap across the table and kick her butt for making me feel like crap. “I’ve got more smarts than you’ll ever know about, Maya!” I barked at her.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Aunt Raven wasn’t about to let my hostility go unchecked. “There is absolutely no need for that. Maya apologize to her.”

“What for?” she asked.

“For being so insensitive.”

“You’re kidding, right?” Maya looked as if she’d just been asked to pick up dog crap with her bare hands.

“No, I’m not.”

Reluctantly, Maya mumbled, “Sorry.”

Aunt Raven released a deep sigh as she pinched the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger. “Okay. So, you haven’t been in school for a while. How did that happen?” she asked.

Shrugging my shoulders, I said, “It just did. Mom was always moving. She’d pack our things at the drop of a dime and move on. It didn’t matter if I was in the middle of the school year or not.”

Aunt Raven focused on me and remained silent for a long moment. It was as if she wanted to say something but didn’t know exactly how to phrase her words.

“It’s not that serious,” I snapped. I wanted to disappear. I reasoned with myself that it would be best for me to go back to the city and do my own thing. I didn’t need or want their pity. I hustled toward the back door that led out to the driveway. I was more than willing to hitchhike all the way back to Chicago, to Grandmother Esmeralda’s house.

“Viviana!” I heard Aunt Raven call my name, but I ignored her.

Just as I was about to sprint down the driveway, I saw an old, brown, rusted-out Chevy pickup truck pulling in.

“Who in the hell is this?” I heard Aunt Raven ask from behind me.

“I have no idea,” I said, trying to make out the face of the driver. It was difficult to do because of the sun’s glare reflecting off the windshield.

“They must be lost or something,” said Aunt Raven as she walked toward the vehicle.

The car came to a halt, and the passenger door swung open. I was in total shock when I saw my mom step out of the truck. I rushed toward her, happy to see that she was okay. I wrapped my arms around her, not caring about the stench of cigar smoke that had saturated her clothing. I stepped out of our embrace to look at her once more. She was wearing a burgundy top with white capri pants that were see-through. I could see the pink-and-white-striped underwear she had on. It was without question a major fashion mistake, even I knew, but my mother probably thought it made her look sexy.

“It’s so good to see you, Mom. I’ve missed you,” I admitted, embracing her again and holding on to her even tighter.

“I’ve missed you, Vivi,” my mother said, calling me by the nickname she’d given me.

Not wanting to let go of her, I said, “I want to go with you.”

Ignoring my comment, she said, “Look at you, Viviana, living all fancy with your cousins.” She admired Aunt Raven’s house as if she were visiting for the first time.

“Will we ever get a house like this?” I asked, hoping she’d somehow been able to do better.

“Someday, baby. You, me and Martin will be a happy family, living in a big, fancy house. One even better than this one,” she said, detaching herself from my embrace as she continued looking around the property.

“Well, for your sake, I would hope that someday is pretty soon.” Aunt Raven gave my mom a brief hug.

“Do you have anything to eat? Martin and I are starving,” my mother said.

“Martin? Who is Martin?” asked Aunt Raven.

“The love of my life.” My mom turned back to the truck and waved for Martin to step out.

“How is everybody doing?” Martin asked as he got out of the truck. As he walked around to where we were, he had to jack his pants up in order to cover his butt crack.

“Ew-wee,” I mumbled as he approached.

My mom introduced them. “Raven, this is Martin. Martin, this is my sister, Raven.”

“Nice to meet you.” Aunt Raven greeted him with a handshake.

I glanced at Martin, noticing his bad eye, and had to immediately look away out of fear I’d go cross-eyed if I stared at him too long.

“Is it all right if I leave the truck parked right here?” Martin asked.

“Sure. It’s not a problem,” Aunt Raven answered.

“So, are you going to invite us in?” my mom asked.

“Yeah, sure. We were just finishing breakfast,” Aunt Raven said. As we walked back toward the house, Martin noticed the gas barbecue grill.

“See, baby. That’s the kind of grill I want to get once we find a place to settle down. You know how important my food is to me, and I’ll barbecue at the drop of a hat,” Martin said jokingly.

“I can’t wait for that day, baby,” said my mom. The fact that she was still with Martin made my stomach flip.

When we walked back inside, Maya and Anna had cleared the table and placed the dishes in the dishwasher. I assumed they had gone back to their rooms and didn’t realize that my mom and Martin had arrived. We made our way to the family room.

“This is a real nice place you’ve got here,” Martin said, admiring the decor.

“Thank you. Why don’t you have a seat?” Aunt Raven said as she grabbed the remote control for the television. She turned it on for him and quickly showed him how to change the channels. “Would you like something to drink?” Aunt Raven offered.

“A beer would be great,” said Martin as he got immediately comfortable.

“It’s still very early in the morning, and you’re driving,” Aunt Raven pointed out. I guess she thought it would make a difference to Martin.

“Honey, I can drink tequila and ride a motorcycle backward with my eyes closed. A beer isn’t going to do much to me.”

I could tell by the way Aunt Raven threaded her eyebrows together that she didn’t like what he’d just said. “I’m sorry. I don’t have any beer or tequila.”

“Don’t worry about it, baby. I’m sure I’ll find something for you. My sister always keeps something around the house,” said my mom, who was once again bending over backward to accommodate this jerk’s every wish.

“Salena, we need to talk,” I heard Aunt Raven say.

“Yes, we do,” my mother agreed, as if nothing about the situation seemed awkward. We went back upstairs and into the kitchen. I sat back down at the table with my mother and Aunt Raven.

“Isn’t Martin wonderful?” my mom asked, glowing as if she were truly in love.

“I don’t know. I haven’t really gotten to know the man, but first impressions make me think he has an alcoholism issue.”

“There you go already, Raven. You’re about to start with the crap!” My mom had gotten offended.

“What? I’ve never been around the type of man who drinks tequila and rides a motorcycle backward. Is he a stuntman or something?” asked Aunt Raven.

“He’s a good man, and that’s all that matters,” my mother replied, defending her relationship with Martin.

“Mom, where have you been?” I asked.

“Yes. Why did you abandon your daughter?” Aunt Raven added.

“What the hell are you talking about, Raven? I didn’t abandon her. I left her with Mom.”

“You know our mother has health issues and can’t take care of Viviana.” I could tell by the pitch of Aunt Raven’s voice that she was getting irritated.

“Don’t let that old woman fool you. She’s not as sickly as she pretends to be. I know that for a fact,” said my mom. “Besides, I’m back for her now.”

“Really? Do you have a place for us to live?” I asked, even though the thought of Martin living with us was creepy.

“Well, not exactly. Martin wants to drive back to his hometown in Louisiana. He said that we can get a mobile home at a really reasonable price. Once he finds work, that’s where we’ll live,” she said.

“Where will you stay until he finds a job?” Aunt Raven asked.

“We’ll stay at a hotel or sleep in the truck.” My mom spoke as if nothing was abnormal about that.

My aunt raised her voice disapprovingly. “How are the three of you going to sleep in a pickup truck?”

“Oh, it’s not so bad. We’ll just treat it like we’re on a camping trip,” said my mom.

“Have you lost your mind?” Aunt Raven shrieked.

“Hey! I’m doing the best that I can, okay!” my mom yelled.

“Maybe it won’t be that bad,” I said, trying to show support for my mom, but in my heart I knew I could not make it sleeping in a pickup truck. I’m a tough Latina, but not that resilient.

“My God, Salena. I swear, sometimes I have a hard time believing you’re my sister,” said Aunt Raven as she combed her fingers through her hair.

“Everyone isn’t perfect like you, Raven. Mom and Dad loved you more. I never got all the things or the attention you got. You could never do wrong in their eyes!”

“Why are you bringing up something that doesn’t even matter in this situation? I’m talking about providing a stable home for your daughter, and you’re bringing up crap from thirty years ago,” Aunt Raven snapped.

“Because it is important, and you know it. Had I gotten just a little bit of the encouragement that you received, I’d be a better woman today.”

“No. You’re the woman you are today because of the choices you’ve made.” Aunt Raven’s words made perfect sense to me, but my mother just didn’t want to hear the naked truth. Instead she twisted it into something she could use.

“Choices,” said my mom and then paused. “You’re right. We all have choices to make. If you think I’m such a horrible mother, what choice are you going to make to fix or help me change my situation?”

Exhaling loudly, Aunt Raven said, “Look, maybe I can talk to Herman, and you and Viviana could stay with us until you’re able to find a job and get on your feet, but I know Herman isn’t going to let Martin live here. I wouldn’t dare ask him to agree to that.”

“Yeah, Mom, I like that idea,” I chimed in, agreeing with the solution Aunt Raven was offering.

“Hell no!” My mother flat out refused the offer. “I wouldn’t go back to living under the same roof with you if I were blind, crippled and crazy.”

“You can’t live out of a damn pickup truck, Salena!” Aunt Raven barked.

“You can’t tell me what I can and can’t do! See, that’s your freaking problem, Raven. You’re too damn bossy.”

Aunt Raven tossed her hands up. “I’m done. Talking common sense to you is pointless.”

“So, you don’t want me living in the pickup truck, right?” my mother asked.

“No,” answered Aunt Raven as she removed a glass from the cupboard. She filled it with crushed ice from the refrigerator, then with water. “Your lifestyle isn’t of concern to me. I am worried about Viviana, though.”

“Okay, then help me out, for Viviana’s sake,” my mom said.

“I’m trying to. Lord knows that I am,” answered Aunt Raven.

“Help me out by giving me a loan,” my mother said.

“You still owe me two thousand dollars, Salena. I’m not giving you any more money,” Aunt Raven said.

“That’s not a lot of money for you.” My mother didn’t give much weight to being in debt to her sister.

Aunt Raven took a drink of water and then just stared into her glass. There was a long moment of silence.

“Get your things, Viviana. We’re not welcome here,” said my mother.

“Viviana isn’t going anywhere. And for the record, I never said that she wasn’t welcome here,” Aunt Raven said.

“No. Viviana is coming with me and Martin to Louisiana,” my mother insisted.

“Viviana needs to go to school,” Aunt Raven said. “And she can’t do that with a registered address being a pickup truck.”

“She can worry about school later,” said my mom.

“Salena, do you even understand what you’re saying?” asked Aunt Raven.

“What? Are you trying to say that I don’t take good care of her?” My mother growled her words like a lion.

“No, you don’t. You’ve moved around so much that Viviana hasn’t earned enough credits to move into her senior year of high school. If you keep moving around like this, she’s going to end up being kicked out of high school because she’ll age out of the system. A seventeen-year-old sophomore isn’t acceptable. She needs stability. She needs a place to call home.”

“If she gets kicked out, she can take the GED test. It’s not a big deal.” My mother pointed her index finger at Aunt Raven.

“Don’t put your finger in my face,” Aunt Raven warned her.

There was another moment of silence. Finally, Aunt Raven spoke. “Viviana, you should go upstairs.”

“Why?” I asked, not wanting to leave. I looked at my mother to see if I should excuse myself or stay put.

“Run along, Viviana,” my mom said. “Raven and I need to work this out.”

“You’re not going to get into a fistfight, are you?” I asked.

“No,” they both said simultaneously.

“Okay, I just wanted to make sure,” I said, getting up from the table. As I made my way back upstairs, I saw Aunt Raven pick up her cell phone. I paused for a moment to see who she was calling. I eavesdropped on the conversation.

“Hello, Mom. It’s me, Raven. Salena has surfaced,” I heard her say.

Two

MAYA

After watching Viviana rush out of the house like a two-year-old having a temper tantrum, I went up to my bedroom. I couldn’t believe she had missed most of her junior year of high school and had to repeat it. I know it wasn’t totally her fault, but it still didn’t stop me from thinking she wasn’t all that bright of a student. I also wasn’t feeling the idea of my mom wanting to let her stay. I wanted Viviana to leave. The longer she stayed around, the more I got a bad feeling something crazy was going to jump off.

I closed my door and grabbed my cell phone from the nightstand, where it was recharging. I saw that I’d received several text messages, and hoped at least one of them was from Misalo. When I checked, I found that there were several photos of shirtless male friends I knew. I shouldn’t really call them friends, since they were just guys from the neighborhood that both Misalo and I hung out with. One shirtless photo had a message that read, Maya, I didn’t know you were so freaky. Heard you broke up with Misalo. Hit me back, Bobby.

There was also a photo of Hector, wearing only his boxer shorts. In the photo he was trying to flex his scrawny biceps muscle, which had a tattoo of a skull. His message read, I can give you all of this and a lot more. Misalo was stupid for letting a super freak like you go. Come see what it feels like to be with a real man, baby. The final one was from a boy named Bailey, who was on the soccer team with Misalo. He forwarded a photo of his pierced tongue. His message read, I have front row tickets to the Lil Wayne concert. What are you willing to do for them? Frustrated and ticked off that they were doing this, I shot them all text messages back that read, Oh, hell to the no! I wouldn’t date you if you were the last idiot on the planet! Now leave me alone!

I heard a knock at my door. “Go away!” I said. Whoever was there clearly didn’t understand English, because I saw the door creep open. “Hey, I said get the hell—” I didn’t finish, because I saw that it was my best friend, Keysha. She was wearing blue jean shorts, a white tank top and some cute sandals. She also had a cute pink scarf covering her damp hair. Keysha worked part-time as a lifeguard at the pool, and liked to cover her hair at the end of her shift.

“I didn’t tell you to enter,” I said condescendingly.

“Whoa, where is this hostility coming from? I came over here to see how you were doing,” Keysha said defensively.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized. “I’m just in a really funky mood.”

Keysha came in and closed the door. “I think your mom is talking to her sister. And did you know that Viviana is blocking the steps, looking like she has to send a late text to her boyfriend?” she asked.

“Huh?” I was completely confused by what Keysha was saying.

Chuckling, Keysha said, “It’s something I overheard. Some guys were at the pool, boasting about how many girls they’d slept with. One of them said, ‘I love having sex, so I use latex so that my girl won’t send me a late text.’ It was the dumbest thing I’d ever heard, but Viviana has a look on her face like she needs to send a late text.”

“Please! That chick couldn’t get the ugliest boy on the planet to even look in her direction. Her attitude is nastier than a baboon’s behind.”

“Wow,” Keysha said, surprised by my total dislike of Viviana.

“I’ll run down and see my aunt Salena later,” I said as I sat down at the foot of my bed. I released a long, depressing sigh. Keysha came and sat next to me. She draped her arm around me and gave me a big hug. I leaned forward and placed my face in the palms of my hands. I gave myself permission to cry while Keysha rocked me.

“Come on, girl. If you start crying, then I’ll start, too,” Keysha said.

I got a lasso around my emotions before getting up to pull a few Kleenex tissues from a box on top of my dresser.

“Have you heard from him?” Keysha asked.

“No. He won’t return my phone calls,” I said.

“Maybe he’ll answer if I call,” Keysha said.

“Would you?” I asked, feeling as if Misalo might answer her phone call.

“Yeah,” Keysha said. She removed her cell phone from her pocket and called him. She then handed me the phone. After several rings, Misalo answered the phone.

“Hey, honey,” I said as sweetly as I could.

“Keysha? I know you’re not trying to hook up with me,” Misalo said.

“This isn’t Keysha,” I said innocently. “It’s me, Maya. Can we talk?” I asked.

“Maya, I’m not going to play these games with you. Obviously you’ve been secretly dealing with Carlo behind my back. I just wish you could have owned up to the fact that you wanted someone else. You didn’t have to string me along, as if we had something special that couldn’t be broken.”

“We do have something special. This is all just a big misunderstanding, baby,” I said, hoping my honey-coated words would reach his heart.

“Maya, you were slow dancing with another guy at a party. I’m done with you,” he said with absolute certainty.

“But I’m not ready for you to be done with me,” I said, feeling my tears swell.

“You should’ve thought about that before you started creeping with Carlo,” Misalo replied, raising his voice at me.

Raising my voice back, I asked, “Will you at least give me a chance to explain my side of the story?”

“Maya, I don’t…” He paused. “You know what? You’re not the woman I thought you were. Just stop bothering me,” he said and hung up. I felt as numb as a rock as I sat there with the phone to my ear, as if he would return and say he was sorry. I felt as if the world had stopped time. I couldn’t bring myself to believe that it was over between Misalo and me.

“What did he say?” asked Keysha.

“He hates me,” I whispered as more tears fell from my eyes.

Keysha attempted to make me feel better. “He doesn’t hate you. Misalo loves you.”

“I have to do something. I’m not going to let this happen,” I said, suddenly feeling angry.

“What are you going to do?” Keysha asked.

“I don’t know, but I’m not giving up. I’ll fight for him if I have to,” I said with absolute resolve.

“Well, you know I’m here for you,” Keysha said, offering her support.

Smearing away my tears of sadness, I turned to her and said, “I love him, Keysha. If his heart is broken, then so is mine. If he feels sad, then so do I. When his soul is wounded, so is mine. He knows in his heart that I wasn’t trying to hurt him.”

“Okay, let’s go back a little. Tell me again what happened,” Keysha said.

“I’m telling you, it was nothing. I snuck out of the house,” I explained.

“I still can’t believe you did that,” Keysha remarked.

“I know. I’m so perfect, right? I never do anything wild or crazy. I’m always the responsible one,” I said mockingly.

“But that’s who you are. As long as I’ve known you, you’ve never pulled the sneak-out-of-the-house stunt.” Keysha reminded me of my untarnished record.

“Have you forgotten about the party I went to where I got my leg broken?” I reminded her.

“No, but that was different,” Keysha said.

“How? It was a party that I wasn’t supposed to be at,” I said, stating the facts.

“Okay, fair enough. So maybe you’re not as perfect as I’m making you out to be, but you’re certainly not a wild child.” Keysha moved over to my bedroom window and glanced out of it. “Looks like your aunt is leaving,” she said.

“Really! Is she taking Viviana with her?” I asked as I sprang to my feet to glance out the window. I saw my aunt and this hulking guy get into a hideous pickup truck. “Eww! What a crappy-looking car,” I said.

“I know. As I came up the driveway, I peeked inside, and, man, was it junky in there. Dude seriously needs to clean out his ride,” Keysha mentioned.

I grumbled as I saw the pickup truck back out of the driveway. “They didn’t take Viviana.”

“Wow. How much longer is she going to be here?” Keysha asked.

“I have no clue,” I said. “One thing is for sure. I’m never going to trust her again.”

“I wouldn’t, either, especially after she left you stranded the way she did.” Keysha pointed out the fact that Viviana had attended the party with me and then had left me stranded.

“Anyway, if I hadn’t run into Carlo at the party, I don’t know how I would’ve gotten back home.”

Keysha cleared her throat and said, “Excuse me. I was on the phone with you that night, offering to pay for your cab fare home.”

“I know, Keysha. Thank you for being there for me,” I said earnestly.

“You’re lucky you’re my BFF, because I wouldn’t shell out money like that for anyone else,” she said.

“I can’t wait to get my driver’s license,” I said.

Keysha snapped her fingers. “I forgot to tell you,” she said excitedly.

“Tell me what?” I asked.

Keysha stood in the center of my bedroom and started doing her happy dance. “My dad has signed me up for private driving lessons. I’m going to be getting my permit and then my driver’s license. Then bam! He’s going to buy me a car. And when that happens, girl, we are going to be driving all over town.”

“Why didn’t you remind me to ask my dad so that we could take the class together?”

“Because on the day I was going to tell you, all of the drama with Misalo happened.” Keysha stopped dancing around.

I sighed. “Do you think I should buy him something? It would be my way of asking for a truce.”

Keysha shrugged her shoulders. “It couldn’t hurt. Maybe if he sees how sorry you truly are, he’ll give you another chance. Still, in my honest opinion, I think Misalo is overreacting to this entire situation.”

“I think so, too.” I felt a swell of sadness rising in my heart once again. “Keysha, I want you to be totally honest with me,” I said.

“I always am,” Keysha reminded me.

“If Wesley, Antonio or Jerry were to come back, saying they were sorry for what they did, which one would you give another chance to?” I asked.

“Wow,” Keysha said as she pondered that one. “In all honesty, the only one I’d truly believe was sorry would be Wesley.”

“So, you’re saying you’d give him another chance?” I asked, just to be extra sure.

Keysha banged the heel of her hand against the side of her head a few times.

“Why are you hitting yourself like that?” I asked, completely confused.

“My scalp itches. The water at the pool has really made my hair dry. Plus, it’s about time for these braids to come out.”

“Okay. You need to warn me before you do that again. I thought you were freaking out or something.” I chuckled.

“Ha-ha,” she said.

“So, answer my question,” I insisted.

“If the circumstances were right, I’d go back to Wesley,” Keysha said.

“Wow! Really?” I asked, thinking for sure she’d give Jerry another shot.

“Yeah. There is just something about Wesley that is kind of pure and innocent,” Keysha explained. “So, what are we going to do? I have the day off.”

“I don’t know. Maybe you should just go and do your own thing today. I’m sort of in a really jacked-up mood,” I said truthfully.

“Well, that’s what best friends are for. We pull each other out of the dumps. You know the Heritage Summer Festival is going on today at the park. We could put on some cute outfits and go see if some hot guys will be there.”

“I don’t feel like changing clothes. I just want to sit around and mope.”

“You could go there and shop for a nice, unique gift for Misalo. Besides, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was there. I overheard lots of people at the pool talking about going.” Keysha knew exactly what to say to get me motivated.

Perking up, I said, “Yeah, you’re probably right.” I moved over to my closet and opened it. “Come on, Keysha. Help me find something to wear.”

“That’s the spirit, girl! Sitting in a room, all gloomy, thinking about what happened will drive you crazy. On top of that, crazy doesn’t look good on you.”

“I agree, but it’s not easy getting over a broken heart,” I admitted as another wave of depression wrapped around me like a warm blanket.

Three

VIVIANA

I didn’t go up to Anna’s room as Aunt Raven had asked me to. Instead, I walked up a few steps, situated myself so I couldn’t be seen, then leaned over the banister, eavesdropping on the conversation my mother and aunt were having with Grandmother Esmeralda. I was able to hear my mother say, “What do you want from me? You want me to admit that I’m not as good as Raven?” I could tell by her tone of voice that my mother was on the brink of having another one of her classic “Get off my back” episodes. I was trying to listen in so hard that I got startled when I saw Maya’s friend Keysha coming up the stairs.

“Excuse me,” she said as if she was royalty and I was some annoying peasant.

“Do you have a problem with saying hello first?” I asked.

Keysha snickered at me. “I am not the one,” she said, stepping past me.

I flipped up my middle finger behind her back before leaning back over the banister to eavesdrop again. I couldn’t hear very much, so I just stood there, wondering what would happen next.

Eventually, my mom came looking for me. When she saw me standing on the stairs, she asked me to come take a walk with her. We went out into the backyard and stood under the shade of a tree.

“Look, you’re going to have to stay with your aunt Raven a little while longer,” she began explaining.

“Are you leaving me again?” My voice was edgy.

“It’s not so bad here,” my mother said defensively.

“I don’t want to live here. I want to live with you in our own house. I want to sleep in my own bedroom.”

“And you will someday,” she said.

“Someday? What do you mean, someday? Are you about to run off with that jerk and just leave me here?” My emotions were swaying between anger and disbelief.

“Look, do you think this is easy for me? Everything changed after your father died. It’s hard for me to find another man like him. I am the most honest, caring and loving woman in the world, but sometimes I feel like I will never find another man like your father. I’m getting old, Viviana, and it’s not easy for a woman like me. Martin is the best I can do right now, and I’m not about to give him up. Not for you, not for Raven, no one. Do you understand me?”

“So, you’re choosing him over me?” I asked as I smeared away an angry tear that was dripping from my left eye.

“I didn’t say that. I said you have to stay here a little longer so that Martin and I can build a life for ourselves. Don’t you want to see me happy again? It’s not like I’m not including you. I’m just telling you that you have to wait.”

“I feel like I’ve been waiting all of my life, Mom,” I said as more tears began flowing.

“Oh, stop being such a crybaby. You’re not a sappy girl. You’re tough, and you need to stop acting like you’re a victim. I’ve never once left you in a bad place. I’ve never left you in a shelter or homeless on the street. I’ve always made sure that you were staying in places much nicer than I could provide for you, and you want to try and make me feel bad because it? What the hell, Viviana?” My mother was now yelling at me.

Feeling the need to match her anger, I said, “You’re my mother! You’re supposed to take care of me.”

“Excuse me.” Aunt Raven came outside. “Why don’t you two come in here and have that discussion? I don’t want you to disturb my neighbors.”

“What? Are you embarrassed by me, Raven?” my mother snapped at her. A few minutes ago my mom seemed reasonable, but now it was as if no matter how polite Aunt Raven was to her, she saw everything she said as a personal attack on her.

“No, but you do need to lower your voice,” said Aunt Raven. My mother gave her sister a nasty look before turning her attention back to me.

“Look. It is what it is, okay? You just have to do what you’ve got to do until Martin and I get settled in.” She wasn’t about to alter her decision.

“Hey, darling, are you about set to hit the road?” asked Martin, who’d walked outside.

Aunt Raven cut her eyes at him before stepping back inside.

“Yeah. She didn’t give me any money, so we’ll have to think of something else,” said my mom as he moved toward the vehicle. She turned to me again. “Like I said, it is what it is. I’m practically leaving you at a vacation hot spot. You have food, a roof over your head, and you’re not with strangers. I’ll call when I get a chance.”

My mother kissed me on the forehead and walked toward Martin, who was standing next to his pickup truck, waiting for her. Once my mother was in the truck, he fired up the motor, which roared louder than the horn of a freight train. A cloud of blue smoke exited the exhaust pipe and billowed through the air. Martin backed the truck out of the driveway and into the street. Before long, he and my mother were gone. Even though I’d stopped crying and gotten my emotions in check, I felt very numb.

My mother didn’t know or seem to care about how hard it was for me. It wasn’t easy to be around Maya and wish that I was her. I wanted a mother and father. I wanted to live in a nice house and have friends to hang out with. I wanted to wear expensive clothes, have a cute boyfriend and not have to worry about anything. She just didn’t seem to understand that although I was staying with family, it was by no means easy.

I went back inside the house and headed toward Anna’s room. As I walked through the kitchen, Aunt Raven stopped me.

“Viviana, honey. Do you want to talk about it?” she asked.

I swallowed down my feelings and held my chin up. “No. I’m cool.”

Seemingly satisfied with my brief answer, Aunt Raven said, “Okay.”

When I entered Anna’s room, she was sitting on the floor, painting her toenails green.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Nothing. Just waiting for the results of a lie detector test,” Anna said.

“Lie detector test?” The words rushed out of my mouth.

“Yeah, I’m not sure which show it is, but this guy who is nineteen has been cheating on his girlfriend who is seventeen,” Anna said as she focused on painting her pinkie toe. “Can you turn up the volume? The television remote is right there.” Anna pointed to the floor beside her. I picked up the remote and turned up the sound when the show came back on.

“What’s going on with this chick?” I asked, noticing this girl who was wearing an incredibly ugly dress and a bad wig.

“She’s pregnant for a second time by her boyfriend. She already has a six-month-old son,” Anna explained.

“Why would anyone want to date her? She isn’t even cute,” I said.

“I don’t know, but her boyfriend is hot. Anyway, she says that she loves him and wants him to be a father to their children,” Anna said.

“Oh, he is cute,” I said when I saw the ugly girl’s boyfriend come onto the stage. “Hopefully the babies will turn out looking like him,” I said, laughing. Anna found my comment just as humorous. The talk show host asked the boyfriend if he’d ever beaten up his girlfriend. He answered, “Yeah. She tries to put her hands on me, and I have to defend myself.” The boyfriend was making gestures with his hands.

“What a jerk,” Anna said, looking up at the screen.

“Yeah, but he is a fine one,” I said, checking him out more. “Do you know who he reminds me of?”

“No. Who?” Anna asked.

“Misalo. Maya’s ex-boyfriend,” I said.

“Oh, God, please don’t say that too loudly. She’s all whacked-out now that he’s dumped her,” Anna said.

“Well, that relationship wasn’t as ideal as she claimed it was,” I said, feeling absolutely no remorse for the role I’d played in ruining Maya’s perfect world.

“Hand me the remote. This guy is irritating me, trying to justify beating up his baby mama,” said Anna

“Don’t worry. I’ll switch the channel for you,” I said, aiming the remote at the television.

“Hey, I wanted to tell you that the thing with you not earning enough credits at school… Don’t sweat it. If you stay here and enroll in school with me, I’ll help you, okay?” Anna said.

I sighed. “Thank you. It looks like I’ll be here for a while. My mom just left and basically orphaned me,” I reluctantly admitted.

“She was here? Why didn’t you come get me? I would have loved to have talked to her,” Anna complained.

“Uh, it wasn’t the type of visit that was a pleasant one. She and your mom pretty much got into a nasty spat.”

“Really?” Anna asked, surprised.

“Yeah, really. Anyway, I don’t want to talk about that right now,” I said, pausing on the show called That’s So Raven.

“I think it would be so cool to be clairvoyant like Raven. Then I’d be able to see into the future,” Anna said.

“Yeah, I’d love to have that ability, as well,” I said as Anna screwed the cap back onto her nail polish.

“Why are you painting your toes that color?” I asked. “It doesn’t really work for your skin tone.”

“Because I like it,” Anna simply said.

“Speaking of liking things, do you still like Carlo as much as you did before?” I asked.

“I told you. I’m done with that. I don’t want anything to do with him,” Anna said convincingly.

“Can I ask a personal question?”

“Sure,” she said.

“What was it like? I mean, being sick from the crystal meth.”

“It was horrible. I just remember feeling very disoriented. The room started spinning around, and my body just did whatever it wanted to without my permission.”

“That’s when you had the seizure,” I said.

“I wouldn’t wish that feeling on my worst enemy,” Anna said.

“Well, I’m just happy that you’re okay,” I said.

“So am I.”

“So, what are you going to do with the rest of your day?” I asked.

“I was thinking about going to the Heritage Festival and hanging out. Other than that, I have no real plans,” Anna said.

“Will there be any guys there?” I asked.

“Yeah, there will be plenty. People from all around come to it. There are even a lot of local bands, singers and all types of artists who perform. I think you’d like it,” Anna said.

“I am so stressed-out right now. Seriously, I would enjoy going there just to help me forget about everything that’s been bothering me,” I said, moving across the room to glance out of Anna’s window. I saw Maya and Keysha walking away from the house.

“Okay, we could go together,” Anna suggested.

“Are you sure you want to go with me and not with one of your girlfriends?” I asked. After seeing Maya and Keysha together, I thought that I was becoming a nuisance and preventing Anna from hanging out with her friends.

“If we go, I plan on calling two of my girlfriends. We could meet them there, and I could introduce you to them,” Anna said.

“I’d like that a lot,” I said as I moved away from the window.

Four

MAYA

Keysha and I walked from my house toward Veterans Park, where the festival was being held. As we got closer, we saw throngs of people walking rhythmically into the park, many of them carrying lawn chairs and ice coolers, in search of the perfect spot to set up. There were little kids with painted butterflies on their faces and balloons tied to their wrists. I noticed several teen couples holding hands and kissing each other. That saddened me because it reminded me of how I felt when I was with Misalo. As Keysha and I made our way past a gathering of girls, we both noticed how they looked at us and started laughing for no apparent reason.

“What was that about?” Keysha asked.

“I have no idea,” I said as I kept moving forward.

“I heard that there is supposed to be a fireworks show tonight,” Keysha mentioned.

“I don’t know if I want to be out here that late. I didn’t bring any bug spray, and you know that we have mosquitoes the size of airplanes around here.”

“Oh, girl, the mosquitoes aren’t thinking about you. They have way too many people to chew on,” Keysha said jokingly.

I would’ve laughed, but I honestly just wasn’t in the mood.

“Do you want to grab something from the concession stand?” Keysha asked.

“I guess,” I said nonchalantly.

Keysha ordered cheese nachos and a Coke. I ordered a pretzel and a drink. Once we had our food, we located an empty picnic table and sat down to eat. As Keysha enjoyed her nachos, I casually glanced around to see who I knew. It didn’t take me long to spot Priscilla. She’d just stepped away from the concession stand with a hot dog. Our eyes made contact, and she walked toward me.

“Is it okay if I sit here with you guys for a minute?” she asked.

“Hey, Priscilla,” Keysha greeted her. It was cool to see that they’d let all the bad blood between them disappear. However, if Priscilla had ruined my prom dress and my evening the way she’d messed up Keysha’s, I’d still be ticked off. I guess Keysha was more forgiving than I was when it came to stuff like that.

“How’s the baby doing?” Keysha asked.

“Please! I don’t want to talk about that right now,” Priscilla said.

“Girl, isn’t it about time to get your perm touched up?” Keysha asked, glancing at Priscilla’s hair, which was looking like a bird’s nest.

“Yes, it is, but every dime I have needs to be saved to buy things for the baby. So, right now I can’t afford to see a beautician.”

“Hasn’t Antonio stepped up and started being a real man yet? I mean, if you had a little help, perhaps things would be different,” I said.

“No. He still doesn’t believe it’s his. He is going to deny it until the baby arrives and he can have a blood test done. I can’t believe how I fell for his bull,” Priscilla said, taking a bite out of her hot dog.

“Are you craving anything yet?” Keysha asked.

“Girl, Chinese food. I swear, the owners at Ming Chow know me by name,” Priscilla said with a chuckle.

“Is your stomach showing yet?” I asked.

“Thank God, no. I would hate to be all big and pregnant over the summer,” Priscilla admitted.

“But that means that during the school year you’ll start showing,” Keysha pointed out.

“I know,” Priscilla murmured. I could tell she wasn’t very proud of that. “You know, when my dad found out I’d gotten pregnant, he cried.” Priscilla took a deep breath, exhaled and then stopped eating. “That was the first time I’d ever seen my dad cry,” she added, getting emotional.

Keysha and I looked at each other and then at her. Neither one of us knew what to do, so we didn’t say a word.

“I’m sorry,” Priscilla took a napkin and dabbed at the tears in her eyes. “I didn’t plan on breaking down.”

“It’s okay,” I said, giving her a hug.

“Thanks,” she said, holding back more tears of regret. After getting her emotions under control, she said, “By the way, I wanted to tell you that you need to be careful about who you send photos to.”

“What are you talking about?” I asked as a feeling of dread filled my heart.

“Everyone knows about the photos of you posing in your underwear. I’ve also overheard girls saying mean things about you.”

“Mean things like what?” Keysha asked.

“Yeah, like what?” I chimed in.

“Well, this one girl got upset because her boyfriend showed her the photos and he wanted her to do the same thing for him and she got really mad at him,” Priscilla said.

“I could just choke Misalo!” I hissed.

“There’s more,” Priscilla continued. “I want you to be careful because people can be very mean.”

“I’m not worried about what people say,” I said.

“But you should be. Look at me. Before I got pregnant, I used to have friends. Now those friends have told me that their parents don’t want them hanging around me. They think I might be a bad influence. It sucks how some people can treat a pregnancy as if it’s the plague.” Priscilla started getting emotional once again.

Both Keysha and I remained silent. I didn’t think we’d given much thought to how a pregnancy or even texting could ruin your reputation. Neither Keysha nor I knew what to make of Priscilla sharing so much of herself.

“Just don’t let people label you as some kind of sex-crazed girl. Ever since people found out I’m pregnant, boys have been trying to have sex with me. They say stupid stuff like, ‘I can’t get you pregnant twice.’ It’s so annoying and humiliating. One jackass even took a photo of his privates with his cell phone and came up and showed it to me. I told him if he ever did it again, I’d call the cops.”

“OMG. I’ve gotten text messages from shirtless guys trying to hook up with me,” I confessed.

“For real?” Keysha asked.

“Yeah,” I said.

“Who? Do you still have the pictures?” Keysha wanted to know.

“No. I deleted them. They were gross,” I said.

“See, that’s what happens when you get a bad reputation. Other girls are the worst. One crazy girl wanted to fight me because her boyfriend was pressuring her. I don’t know how or why, but somehow she got it in her head that when I announced that I was pregnant at the prom, her boyfriend suddenly wanted her to be more like me.”

“How does that happen?” Keysha asked.

Priscilla rolled her eyes. “For the life of me, I just don’t understand how people get stuff twisted. I swear, sometimes I know exactly how President Obama feels. If they could blame natural disasters on him, they would.”

“Wow,” I said. I had never thought about what she was going through. Priscilla finished her hot dog, and the three of us sat around and chatted for about twenty minutes.

Then, all of a sudden, Priscilla said, “My stomach feels horrible.”

“Are you okay?” Keysha asked.

“I just feel like I want to vomit…” A sour expression formed on Priscilla’s face.

“Maybe you ate a bad hot dog,” I said.

“No, it’s not that. It’s morning sickness,” Priscilla explained. “Look, my house is just across the street. My mom is there. I’ll see you guys around.”

“Do you want us to walk you back?” I asked.

“No,” Priscilla said, rising up. She took a hard swallow, looked both of us in the eyes and said, “I’ll see you guys around.” I watched as Priscilla walked toward the edge of the park.

Keysha and I finished eating our food and decided to walk around and explore everything at the festival. We looked at clothing, trinkets and other merchandise. We came across a vendor who sold all types of hats. Keysha decided that she wanted to check it out. She and I both tried on several summer hats that we thought were cute.

“Ooh, that one makes you look grown and sexy, Maya,” she said as I tugged at the brim of a hat I’d tried on. Keysha picked up one just like it and tried it on.

“Now, you know that’s against the rules, right?” I asked.

“I know. I don’t want to walk around looking like your twin,” she said jokingly. Keysha looked at herself in the mirror. “Oh, God, I look like my mother wearing this thing.” She immediately took it off and put it back.

We moved along to another vendor, who was selling sunglasses. Keysha picked up a pair, tried them on, turned and looked at me for approval.

“Oh, you look like such a diva in those,” I said, complimenting her.

“Really?” she asked, searching for a mirror.

“Yeah. You look like a woman who has it all together. Especially with the head scarf you have on.”

Keysha found a mirror, glanced at herself and began making kissy face gestures.

“I do look kind of cute,” she said, removing the sunglasses to check the price. “I think I’m going to get them. Do you see anything that you want?” she asked.

“No. I’m not really shopping for myself. I want to find something for Misalo,” I said, looking around at the other vendors to see where I could go. I spotted a guy who was spray painting T-shirts. “Keysha, I’ll be over there.” I pointed to where I’d be.

“Okay. I’ll catch up with you,” she said as I stepped away.

I made my way over to the artist merchant. There were a number of people looking over his shoulder at what he was creating. When I got a chance to take a peek, I realized that he was finishing up a T-shirt with a caricature drawing of Sabrina and Keysha’s brother, Mike. Mike and Sabrina were sitting on a stool. Sabrina was sitting on his lap with her cheek pressed to his face and her arm draped over his shoulder.

“You guys are going to love the way this has turned out,” I said, admiring how well the designer had captured their features.

When the designer finished, Mike paid him while Sabrina and I stood off to the side.

“Hey, Maya. How are you?” Sabrina asked.

“I’m hanging,” I said, trying not to sound depressed.

“I’m sorry about you and Misalo. I heard about what happened,” she said.

“Thanks, but it’s not over just yet.” I didn’t want her sympathy.

“Even after what he did to you? I mean breaking up is one thing, but doing what he did was just wack.” Sabrina looked at me as if I were dumb for even wanting him back.

“I love Misalo, okay? I’ve been with him for a long time, and you just don’t walk away when things get tough,” I told her, pleading my case.

“What’s up?” Mike asked as he walked up and handed Sabrina the T-shirt. While Sabrina was focused on the

T-shirt, I noticed Mike glancing at me with lust in his eyes.

“Oh, God! Not you, too!” I said with disgust.

Shrugging his shoulders, Mike said, “What?”

“You were just undressing me with your eyes, Mike. You saw the photos, didn’t you?” I asked.

Mike nervously glanced at Sabrina and then back at me.

“Come on. Be honest,” I said, urging him to tell me the truth.

Choosing his words carefully, Mike said, “One of the guys on the football team showed them to me. I told him he should delete them.” I knew Mike was lying through his teeth, but there wasn’t a thing I could do about it.

“Well, I got the text photos, too. As soon as I saw the first picture, I started hitting the delete button,” said Sabrina. “Me, personally, I think you’re very brave for even coming out in public. You know how rumors spread around this town. People can take something as innocent as the sun shining and twist it into a story about a giant meteorite on a collision course with Earth. But I understand why you took the pictures. I know exactly what true love feels like. I took some sexy photos for Mike. I’m just so glad he kept his promise and didn’t forward them to all of his immature friends.”

“Well, Misalo said the same thing. I still haven’t found out why he did it,” I said.

“When I saw him earlier, I was going to ask him the same thing, but the moment I mentioned your name, he cut me off. He said that he didn’t want to talk about you at all,” Mike informed me.

“Wait, what do you mean, when you saw him earlier?” I asked.

“He’s here walking around somewhere,” Mike replied, confirming what I was thinking.

“Seriously?” I asked, glancing around the crowd and searching for him.

“Hey, guys. What’s up?” asked Keysha, who’d come over after paying for her sunglasses.

“Damn! Those big-ass glasses make you look like a fly.” Mike insulted Keysha and then started laughing.

“That’s not funny, Mike,” Sabrina said, elbowing him in the ribs.

“Forget you, Mike.” Keysha punched his shoulder several times.

“I was just joking. Jeez! Calm down,” Mike said as he moved away from Keysha.

“Where are you guys headed?” Keysha asked Sabrina and Mike.

“We’re going to the concession stand to get some food. Do you guys want to come with us?” Sabrina asked.

“No, we just came from there,” Keysha informed them. “I actually just saw Wesley, and he wanted me to head over to the main stage to watch some type of performance,” she announced.

“We were over there earlier, when a local dance school was performing. It was mostly little kids, though,” Mike said.

“Do you think Misalo is over there?” I asked.

“He might be. He was walking in that direction when I last saw him,” Mike said.

“Well, that’s where Keysha and I are headed,” I said.

“Cool. We’ll see you guys later,” said Sabrina as she looped her arm around Mike’s waist and began tugging him along.

“Peace.” Mike held up his first and second fingers as he and Sabrina backed away.

* * *

Keysha and I made our way over to the main stage. There were large banners with the logos of the corporate sponsors, speakers, microphones and an assortment of musical equipment. Tan metal foldaway chairs were neatly organized in rows, ten seats across and ten seats deep. All the seats were nearly filled.

“Look. Two people are getting up from those front-row seats,” Keysha pointed out.

We picked up our pace to ensure that we got the prime spot. Once we got situated, I took a glance around in search of Misalo, but I did not see him.

“So, what’s this all about, Keysha?” I asked as we watched a musician sit down and begin slapping his palms against bongos.

“I have no idea. In fact, I was very surprised to see that Wesley was out of rehab,” Keysha confessed.

“How did he look?” I asked.

“Really good,” she answered.

“So, like, where is Lori? Why wasn’t she attached to him?” I asked.

Keysha chuckled. “I asked the same question. I was, like, ‘So, where is your shadow?’ Wesley grimaced when I mentioned Lori. He said that she went back to Indianapolis to visit her family.”

“So, he’s still dating her?” I asked.

“According to him, he dumped her,” Keysha said.

Before long, a man appeared onstage. He walked up to a microphone that was positioned center stage. He adjusted the height of the stand and gave the microphone a few taps with the pads of his fingers to make sure it was on.

“Thank you for coming out and spending your afternoon with us here at today’s festival. My name is Omar, and I’m one of the many organizers of this event. This year I wanted to do something different. I wanted to showcase some local spoken word artists. I hope you enjoy their work and what they have to say. First up is Candice. She’s a freshman at Illinois State University.”

“I used to see her around Thornwood when she was a senior. I never knew she was a poet, though,” said Keysha.

“Hello, everyone,” Candice said, greeting the audience. She was wearing a cute blue and white top with a matching miniskirt. She looked as if she was about to say something really interesting. “This piece is called ‘Standing There.’”


He’s standing with her now.

And I’m remembering the way he used to be when he was with me.

Tell me. While you’re standing there with her, are you thinking about me?

Do you remember slow dancing with me? Do you remember what you said to me?

You used to kiss the crevices of my tortured heart. You used to look into my eyes and tell me all the things I needed to hear but didn’t care to listen to.

Do you ever think about me when you’re with her?

Because I think about you. I think about you the way moonlight thinks about stars. I think about you the way hearts think about love. I think about you the way a soul thinks about finding a mate.

I’m going to tell you what I really think about her.

She’s the knockoff of Chanel.

The prototype for everything I was to you.

She is a copycat.

She will never fill the void in your soul the way that I did.

Neither of you will ever know the pain I felt as I listened to you tell her

“I Do.”


The audience clapped for her because it truly was a very good poem.

Keysha leaned in close to me and whispered, “She was all up on your street with that line about ‘I think about you the way a soul thinks about finding a mate.’”

“Well, it’s true. I can’t help the way my heart feels,” I stated.

Omar came back on the stage. “Okay, moving right along. Next, we have Wesley.”

“OMG,” Keysha said as a smile spread across her face.

Wesley walked up to the microphone.

“I’m a little nervous,” he said as he scanned the crowd. The moment his eyes found Keysha, he smiled. “The poem I’m about to read is called ‘Keysha’s Heart,’ and I’d like to dedicate it to a very special friend.” He nodded in Keysha’s direction to let her know that he was referring to her.

Keysha got all giddy. She sat upright and listened attentively. Omar sat down at the bongos and began playing, making light background sounds for Wesley’s piece.

“This is something I wrote the very first time that I saw you, but I only recently finished it,” Wesley said before he began.


I am fascinated and captivated by your mystery and secrets.

I want to know who you are and what part of heaven you come from.

I want the combination to your heart so that I can make your emotions my own.

Whenever I think about you, my heart and soul soar like an eagle.

Your smile is like warm sunshine on my face.

Whenever it rains, it reminds me of all the tears I’ve caused you to shed.

Your teardrops burst inside my soul and remind me of how much we’ve been through.

My heart wants to dance with your heart and tell it how sorry I am.

My soul sings for you and my mind is consumed with thoughts of us

being together as one once again.

I once read that the first step toward healing is learning to forgive.

I hope you can forgive me so that I can walk one more step closer to you.


I glanced at Keysha and noticed her eyes brimming with moisture. I opened my purse and handed her a tissue.

“That was so beautiful.” Keysha wiped away a teardrop. “Wasn’t that sweet?” she asked, glancing back at me.

“Yes, it was nice,” I acknowledged as the next poet came onto the stage. In the back of my mind, I was wishing Wesley was Misalo, apologizing to me. Keysha and I sat and listened to several more spoken word artists.

When that segment of the program concluded, Keysha said, “Come on. I want to go talk to Wesley about his performance.”

“You go ahead. I’m going to run to the bathroom. I’ll come back,” I said.

“Okay.” Keysha was on such an emotional high that she damn near levitated toward the rear of the stage, where the performers were.

“Oh, God,” I mumbled to myself. “I hope she isn’t planning on trying to hook back up with him. That would just be too crazy.” I asked one of the security guards where the portable bathroom was, and she pointed me in the right direction. As I walked across the field and maneuvered my way through the crowd, I thought I saw Misalo off in a distance, talking to someone. It was difficult to confirm whether or not it was him because of my position and the size of the crowd.

“Misalo,” I called, hoping he’d turn in the direction of my voice, but he couldn’t hear me over the noisy crowd. I was finally able to move to a better position and confirm that it was him. He was hugging some girl.

“Who in the hell is that?” I asked myself as I rushed toward them. As I got closer and saw who he was with, I blurted out, “Oh, hell no!” and quickened my pace.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” I asked, tugging on his arm.

“Uh, excuse you. I do believe you’re being very rude,” said Viviana.

“You need to stay away from him. You two don’t have a thing to talk about,” I snapped at her.

“Look, Maya. Why don’t you go hang out with Carlo? That’s who you really want,” said Misalo.

I tried to get him to look into my eyes so that he could see the truth. He turned his cheek to me. He couldn’t even bring himself to meet my gaze.

“Is that what you think?” I asked.

“Please. You want Carlo more than a bee wants a pot of honey,” Viviana said, as if she were a credible authority on what I wanted.

I stepped in front of Misalo, raised my voice and pointed my finger in Viviana’s face. “You know what? You need to stay out of my business, trick!”

“Get your finger out of my face, Maya!” Viviana snarled, issuing a threat.

“And if I don’t?” I encouraged her to make a move on me. I was all set to beat her down for even talking to Misalo.

“You know what? I’m going to be the bigger person today. Besides, it’s obvious that Misalo wants nothing to do with you. He didn’t even hang around to listen to your annoying voice.” Viviana laughed at me condescendingly.

I looked over my shoulder, and sure enough, Misalo had walked away. I scanned the crowd but could not locate him.

“Obviously, you don’t have a clue as to what it takes to keep a man,” Viviana remarked as she turned and began walking away.

“Go to hell, Viviana!”

“I’ve already been there. It’s your turn now, honey,” she said, flipping up her middle finger at me.

I was literally about to rush up to her and beat her down, but I saw my little sister, Anna, approaching her and decided against it, at least for right now.