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First published by HarperCollinsPublishers 2020

FIRST EDITION

© Jack Edwards 2020

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Source ISBN: 9780008365646

Ebook Edition © August 2020 ISBN: 9780008365653

Version: 2020-06-30

Note to Readers

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Dedication

This book is dedicated to my A Level Biology teacher, who told me it was ‘time to start aiming lower’ – I’m glad I didn’t.

Contents

1  Cover

2  Title Page

3  Copyright

4  Note to Readers

5  Dedication

6  Contents

7  Introduction

8  CHAPTER 1: BEFORE YOU GO TO UNIVERSITY

9  How to pick your course

10  Open days and picking the perfect university

11  How to write a killer personal statement

12  10 tips to ace your A Levels

13  Preparing for results day

14  Dealing with rejection (spoiler alert: it’s going to be okay)

15  CHAPTER 2: SO YOU’RE OFF TO UNIVERSITY …

16  What to pack

17  How much should I read before term begins?

18  The university dictionary

19  Freshers’ Week

20  Settling in

21  How to make your room your own

22  Living in London

23  CHAPTER 3: WORK

24  Contact hours

25  How to wake up for your 9 a.m. lecture

26  Picking a dissertation topic

27  Reading smart and how to research

28  Understanding the university grading system

29  Alternative uses for your degree

30  CHAPTER 4: BASIC SURVIVAL

31  How to find a student house

32  How to avoid murdering your housemates

33  The en-suite life

34  How to do laundry

35  How to use an iron

36  How to recycle

37  How to budget

38  How to pay rent

39  How to pay bills

40  How to read meters

41  How to keep houseplants alive

42  How to cook

43  Recipes

44  Cheap and easy vegan cooking

45  CHAPTER 5: SOCIAL

46  Clubs and societies

47  Societies you didn’t know existed, but will now want to join …

48  How to get involved in clubs and societies

49  Surviving your first social

50  Social theme ideas

51  Costume ideas

52  Group games

53  CHAPTER 6: LIFE

54  How does student finance work?

55  Grants and scholarships

56  University summers and what to do with them

57  Should you get a job at university?

58  Studying abroad

59  Diversity at university

60  CHAPTER 7: WELLBEING

61  Let’s talk about mental health

62  Imposter syndrome at university

63  Where to find help if you need it

64  Conclusion

65  Some Recommendations

66  Acknowledgements

67  About the Publisher

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Introduction

Hey! My name is Jack Edwards and I’ve just finished my final year studying English Literature at Durham University. This is The Uni-Verse – my ultimate guide to university, sharing an actual student’s perspective. From dressing as a jellyfish using only bubble wrap and tape to setting my microwave on fire with a single piece of bread, I’ve really done it all, and with this book I hope to impart all the wisdom I’ve gained … conflagration not included.

So, whether you’re looking for housemates to live with or tips and tricks to help avoid murdering them, this is your complete, unadulterated, unfiltered survival guide with all the trimmings. Just think of me as the Bear Grylls of university. Except I’ve never been on a rugby club bar crawl, so I’ve never actually had to drink my own urine.

I was the first in my immediate family to go to university, so I had pretty much no idea what I was doing when I applied. There were so many questions bubbling away in my brain, and a dearth of useful information online. It’s safe to say that, when I first packed my bags and left for university, I was an incompetent monkey (my parents would almost too eagerly agree) … I truly put the ‘fun’ in fundamentally incapable. I’d like to think that I actually know what I’m doing now (my parents may not so eagerly agree on this one) and I’ve had the most incredible time working it all out. This is the book I would’ve wanted to read three years ago before I embarked on the academic heptathlon that is university, and that’s why I’m so passionate about writing it. Also, I’m an English Lit student, so this is pretty much a dream come true.

This book includes everything I think you need to know, including what to pack, what to expect from your first day/week/term, how to pay rent, and the all-important question: how the hell do you keep houseplants alive? Seriously, how do you expect to keep yourself alive if you have the carcass of a rotting succulent on your bookshelf? I’ve got you covered.

CHAPTER 1
BEFORE YOU GO TO UNIVERSITY

So, you want to go to university? Amazing! There are a few things you need to do before you find yourself in the lecture hall (or the nightclub) on day one of Freshers’ Week, so I’ve dedicated the first section of this book to the pre-uni hustle. After all, there’s a personal statement to write, the emotional roller coaster that is UCAS Track and the small matter of exams to get through first. And we all know the ‘h’ in exam season stands for ‘happiness’ …

How to pick your course

Of course, the first thing you should think about when applying to go to university is *drum roll please* the course you’ll be studying! It’s so crucial that you get this right and opt for something that you’re genuinely passionate about, because you’ve got to live, breathe and sleep it (or, indeed, get-no-sleep-and-pull-an-all-nighter it) for three, four or even more years.

And the key word there is you. Your subject has to be something you care about. Not what your parents think will lead to a successful career that they can brag about to strangers they meet on dog walks. Not what your teachers tell you you’re destined to study because you pretend you know what’s going on in class surprisingly convincingly. Not what your horoscope suggests you’d be good (or Sagit-terrible) at. You don’t want to be the one left picking up the Pisces.

It’s about what you know you enjoy. It’s about studying the thing that is going to wake you up in the morning and excite you.

The best way to get an insight into what a course entails is by checking different university department websites. Often they’ll have full breakdowns of what each year of the course expects of you and the content they cover.

If there are a few different subjects that you particularly enjoyed or excelled in during your GCSEs, A Levels, BTECs or IB years, and you can’t quite pick one, then investigate all of them. There’s no harm in not knowing just yet, and no shame in testing the water of a few different subjects at this initial stage. It can be hard narrowing down your options – it’s like picking your favourite Friends character. Although we all know no one’s favourite is Ross.*

Alternatively, there’s always the safety-net option of taking what’s known as ‘combined honours’, which means you study multiple subjects. If you opt for this, it’s probably a good idea to take two subjects that complement each other (like History and Politics, Maths and Physics, or English and Psychology), but that’s not to say that other combinations aren’t valid, too. In fact, the more obscure the combination you go for, the more nuanced and unique your research and dissertation could be – although that’s a pretty intense, long-term investment in a 12,000-word essay.

At open days, it’s definitely a good idea to go to subject talks, where a professor will give a presentation on the experience you can expect from a specific degree. If there are multiple subjects that you’re toying with then go to all the different subject presentations, and that should make it pretty clear to you which one excites you the most. I certainly found it useful for narrowing down my options.

Reading lists and lecture breakdowns† should be available online via faculty websites and will be invaluable in your decision-making. Also, every uni is different and creates their own unique modules, as well as a different way of studying (and examining) the subject, so it’s worth casting your net pretty wide at first.

Another thing to look out for is a subject that you’ve never had a chance to study before, especially those that link to the subjects you have taken previously. Not everyone will have had the opportunity to study things like Anthropology, Geology or Film before university, but one of them may actually be the course you’re best suited to. Often course documents/guides will suggest some traditional subjects that facilitate these more specific degrees – for example, a background in Biology or History would complement an Anthropology‡ degree perfectly. *Italian chef kiss*

I suppose the main point here is that picking the right course for you to study should be your number-one priority, because it’s the thing that will envelope your life for the foreseeable future. No subject is too niche, or too broad, or too hard, or too easy, regardless of what anyone tells you. Pursue what is going to intrigue and fascinate you, because it’s going to be an enormous part of your university experience.

* Disclaimer: I mean that no one’s favourite Friends character is the palaeontologist Ross, who has more divorces than cats have lives … not just any normal person called Ross. I’m sure other people called Ross are lovely.

† The idea of ‘lecture breakdowns’ is something you will become very familiar with over the course of your degree, in a very different context to the one I’m referring to here.

‡ Anthropology is the study of human cultures and societies and their development. I will confess, I had never even heard of this before going to uni and coming face to face with budding anthropologists. To be totally honest, I’m still not 100 per cent sure what it entails. However, it most definitely does exist and sounds fascinating! Just make sure you can spell it.

Open days and picking the perfect university

On open days, universities ‘open’ their doors to allow prospective students to have a mooch around and suss out their potential new home. I remember being very self-conscious on open days, because I felt like the bigwigs at the uni were watching my every move and waiting for me to give them a reason not to accept me. One thing I thought I’d tell you straight away is that nothing you do on the open day will have an impact on your chances of getting in … unless you kill someone.

Open days are for you. They’re for the university to show off their facilities and try to entice you into applying. This is their chance to win you over. That’s why they practically throw freebies at prospective pupils.

Things you should consider when picking a university

1 Location: How far away from home is it?* Is the commute to/from this location easy or complicated? What other cities are nearby?

2 Grade expectations: What grades do the universities expect from you? I’d recommend applying to at least one uni that is quite ambitious, and at least two that are safe bets (as in, you know you’re likely to get the grades they’d expect of you).

3 Accommodation: What are the different types of accommodation available? How close to the campus or university buildings are they? What’s the bathroom situation? What’s the kitchen/common area like?

4 Campus/city: Campus universities are very self-contained, and usually a bus ride away from the city. They’ll have accommodation, department buildings and probably a club all in one central hub. City universities have their academic facilities dotted around, so you get to actually live in the city centre.

5 Catered/self-catered: Lots of unis have the option to be catered in your first year (meaning your meals are cooked for you and served in a dining hall) – this can be very sociable and ameliorates one of those initial living-alone stresses of having to cook for yourself. Being self-catered, however, gives you lots more independence and flexibility, and is also cheaper. Pick whichever suits you best.

6 Facilities: If you’re training to play tennis at Wimbledon, it’s probably pretty crucial that your uni has a tennis court. Make sure the one you pick has the facilities you need: a gym; access to a swimming pool; study spaces etc.

7 Opportunities: The student experience is obviously key. Make sure all your dreams for uni are going to be satisfied, for example by ski trips, volunteering projects and charity challenges like Jailbreak.

8 Careers: What links does the university have to your ideal career path? Will they set you up with the right contacts? For example, if you’re hoping to study media or film, a specialist university with connections to those industries is going to be more beneficial to you than, say, a Russell Group institution.

9 Culture: Edinburgh has the Fringe, Manchester and London are cultural capitals, Brighton and Newcastle have wild nights out. Do some research to see what life in the city is like, and what events they have going on.

Make sure you ask loads of questions. Remember all the students volunteering at open days have given up their time to be there, and want to help you. They also aren’t trying to sell the uni to you and so will be as brutally honest as they can be.

Also, take photos! There’s a big time gap between open days and results day when you find out if your place is confirmed, and you’ll appreciate the reminders of what the accommodation and facilities look like. Plus, all the universities you visit tend to kind of merge into one in your head, so photos are useful reminders of which is which.

Check if you need tickets to visit certain accommodation or university buildings, as some are so popular that the uni has to regulate how many people are inside at each time. All info will be on the university website.

My top tip would be to keep track of your opinions on each university by having a score sheet on your phone. Rate each one on the accommodation, the facilities and all the other aspects I spoke about above, and then you’ll have a quantitative way of comparing them. My parents also kept their own score sheets and we’d sit and compare them after each open day, as I appreciated having a second (or third) opinion.

An example score sheet would be:

| Uni 1 | Uni 2 | Uni 3 | Uni 4 | Uni 5
Accommodation |  |  |  |  |
Facilities |  |  |  |  |
Opportunities |  |  |  |  |
Location |  |  |  |  |
Course |  |  |  |  |

* I should add that distance is actually much less of a big deal than you may first think. I moved 350 miles away from home for university and was terrified, but actually, once you’re there, you totally forget about the distance. I didn’t apply to unis that were in Scotland because it felt too far from home, and I regretted it massively. It’s also great to experience a brand-new part of the country that isn’t anywhere near home.

How to write a killer personal statement

So, how do you write the perfect personal statement without, on the one hand, sounding arrogant and self-congratulatory or, on the other, underselling yourself and seeming a bit unimpressive. How do you prove your undying passion for a subject you most likely picked out of a process of elimination? How do you reference texts, and do you need to bother actually reading them? I’ve been to countless talks at top universities about how to concoct the perfect personal statement and so, with this guide, I’ve got you covered. Also, spoiler alert, YES, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY HAVE READ THE TEXTS YOU MENTION.

(Note: These are personal statements that are killer in the positive sense – they pack a punch; a knockout blow assured to secure your space at the uni of your dreams. They are not personal statements for killers. We’re not applying to be the next Ted Bundy. Even if the process of writing a personal statement can be Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile.)*

The essentials

Think of your personal statement as an essay, only it’s an essay on yourself. It’s a way of showing an admissions officer – who, by the way, just wants you to make their job easier – what you’re about and why you’re the best thing since someone had the ingenious idea of putting peanuts inside M&M’s. (Seriously, where’s their Nobel Prize?)

1 Remember what information has already been covered in the rest of your application. When you apply to a university, it’s not just your personal statement that is sent to them. There’s also the rest of your UCAS application, which includes a reference from your school or sixth form, and a full transcript of your academic record. It’ll tell the admissions officer about all the grades you have acquired over the years, and contextualise them with the school you went to and the area you grew up in. For this reason, you don’t need to flaunt your past grades (or your target grades for the future) in your personal statement. If you got an A in your Maths GCSE – or 7/8/9 for those studying under the new system – which will suggest your suitability for a Maths degree, then the admissions staff will already know. Don’t waste valuable space by inserting each grade you’re proud of one-by-one and the circumstances in which you achieved them. You’ll only be repeating yourself.

2 The ‘academic versus non-academic’ split … Remember that this is an essay proving your academic ability and aptness for a particular academic programme. I’m repeating the word academic here intentionally, because it truly is the most important thing to focus on. With this in mind, your personal statement should be at least 70 per cent focused on your scholarly ability, insights and flare. Basically, talk about your subject and why it fascinates you. What areas are you most intrigued by? How have you researched the subject outside of the standard curriculum? What are you hoping to investigate further? Remember that the people running your course care so much about the subject and will be salivating at the thought of someone excited to scuba-dive into it. For top universities, I’d recommend taking this one step further and making your statement at least 80 per cent academic, if not more. Also, if things haven’t gone to plan in the past – for example, if your GCSE results weren’t quite what you’d hoped for – this could be a great place to explain why this was the case, and, most importantly, how you’ve developed since.

3 How to talk about extra-curricular activities: Okay, so you play for a hockey team, have a bronze Duke of Edinburgh Award and used to babysit your neighbour’s cat once a month, but does that really make a university want you? The answer isn’t actually a straightforward no. You can use all of these things to your advantage by linking them back to your degree. As an example, I used the final paragraph of my personal statement to share some extra-curricular activities I’d partaken in, which could be utilised to prove my interest in the subject and assimilated with the rest of the essay, rather than being slapped on at the end. This section should be like the air freshener placed in your vehicle after a car wash, tying the whole thing together and packing that final citrusy punch. For example, when applying for an English Literature degree, I chose to focus on the use of language in novels, particularly psychoanalytical and feminist ones. Then, when I spoke about my extra-curriculars, I continued to discuss language, explaining how I had to alter my word choices, tone and sentence structure when addressing the children in the library I volunteered at, my peers in my role as Head Boy of my school and the audience of my online blog. When I played for a football team for ten years, I communicated with my teammates in a very different way to how I addressed customers in my part-time retail job. This was essentially a bedazzled list of my interests and achievements outside of the education system, adorned with references back to my interest in the subject I wished to study. Always, always, always link it back to the degree!

4 Referencing texts: Your personal statement should absolutely, definitely reference several texts outside of the standard curriculum, which prove that you are an active student. What I mean by the word active is that you are engaged, astute and interested in that area of study: if you’re hungry to learn more, then you’re the perfect university candidate, right? Making reference to texts you have explored in your own time is absolutely vital – it’s called a personal statement because it’s about your personal passion for the subject. Also, texts don’t have to be books; they can be podcasts, TED talks, films, articles, blog posts or even songs. The more unique, the better. Also, don’t assume that academics are snobby about what texts you reference – as long as they’re utilised in the correct context, and balanced by scholarly material, they’re valid and relevant. Be careful not to simply reel off texts, though. You’re better off writing about a limited number of texts than sending off a shopping list disguised as a bibliography. Maybe focus on one or two primary texts, then refer to critical material surrounding it, and discuss your opinions and thoughts, as well as what you’d be interested to investigate further if given the opportunity. Hey – that opportunity could be going to the university! What a startling coincidence! Cut to the admissions officer rubbing their hands together in glee.

5 Actually read the texts you reference: You’d have thought this would be obvious, right? Still, it definitely needs saying. Don’t mention anything you haven’t genuinely listened to, watched or read, because you’ll only make yourself look more foolish than if you’d referenced nothing at all. It’ll shine like a strobe light in a nightclub if you haven’t actually done the work you’re claiming. Allow me to share a personal, rather traumatic, anecdote that should hammer this into your head. So, in my personal statement, I mentioned Nabokov’s novel Lolita. When I had an interview at Oxford University, the professor conducting the interview said to me that he had noticed this in my personal statement, since Lolita was a novel he had dedicated his life’s research to, and Nabokov was an author he specialised in and lectured on as a scholar. He proceeded to open the (conveniently placed) drawer of his desk and pull out his very own copy, which had – I am absolutely certain – been placed there specifically in anticipation of my interview for dramatic effect. He looked me in the eye and, with a smirk, asked ‘How does it begin?’ My heart racing like Mo Farah and my mind frantically rummaging through the filing cabinets of memories in my brain, I desperately tried to recall the opening scene of a novel I’d read years ago by the pool on holiday in Majorca. Thankfully, I had read the novel and did manage to recall the first scene, but if I had only read a SparkNotes overview, I would’ve been well and truly screwed. That was nearly a horror story the Saw franchise would’ve been proud of and was only narrowly averted. YOU HAVE TO READ THE BOOKS YOU REFERENCE.

6 This is a No-B.S. zone: Avoid exaggeration and hyperbole, and be realistic. So many people naturally feel the urge to open their personal statements by suggesting that the genesis of their interest in Biology was the moment they were plucked from the womb, screaming and crying only because they were so ecstatic to be entering a world where they would eventually have the opportunity to study this subject at university. By saying, ‘I’ve always had an interest in biology,’ you’re not really saying anything at all. It’s also just not true. I’m sure you didn’t give a toss about the structure of a leaf or the process of osmosis when you were three years old and needed assistance zipping up your own raincoat. Instead of declaring that you’ve always possessed a passion for fashion Biology, talk about why you’re fascinated by it now.

7 Link your degree to the other subjects you studied: Just because you aren’t taking your other A Level subjects further, it doesn’t mean the insight they gave you won’t be valuable to your degree. So, if you’re applying to a Geography degree but also took Politics at A Level, you could make your personal statement more interesting by focusing on a geopolitical discussion – a perfect fusion of the two. If you also took psychology, you could go on to discuss this in relation to the other two subjects as well, but always link back to the course you’re actually applying to study as the main emphasis. You don’t have to do this, but it might be a good starting point when you embark on the odyssey that is writing a personal statement.

8 How do you begin a personal statement? Unfortunately, I don’t have a straightforward answer to this question, because the personal statement is unique to every single person. The opening line should definitely be eye-catching, to make the admissions officer – who, by the way, is probably on personal statement 104 of the day – immediately want you. Some people opt for a quote, while others pose a question, but the important thing is to then expand on this and keep drawing back to it. Don’t just chuck it in for the sake of it, because it’ll be startlingly obvious if that’s what you’ve done.

9 Don’t expect it to be perfect straight away. Just like any essay, the personal statement takes time. Except, in this case, you’ve never written a personal statement before, or been able to practise and hone your craft. Draft and re-draft … then re-draft again. Get feedback from subject-specific teachers. Ask your parents to read it to make sure it’s coherent and makes sense on a fundamental level. Get your peers to read it, too. And, most importantly, don’t be too protective over it. The first draft won’t be perfect, and all the feedback you receive will be completely invaluable. Don’t be offended if someone says they don’t understand, or if a teacher tells you that what you’re saying isn’t accurate – take it on the chin and see how you can improve what you’ve written. It’ll come together eventually, but don’t expect to master it straight away.

The extras

Not sure how to prove that you’re the perfect candidate? I get it; it’s difficult to prove your interest in a subject, and most of us are unlikely to have dedicated much time to it outside of school, because we’re too busy focusing on – well – school. Here are some ideas on how to improve your application right now:

 Look for articles online (for example on JSTOR and Google Scholar). To go deeper, or find something more appropriate, check the bibliography of an article as these can be gold mines for more refined essays that you didn’t spot on first inspection.

 Start a blog/podcast that discusses the subject. You don’t have to share this with anyone you know and can keep it totally anonymous. It just proves you have an organic interest in the subject, which you want to discuss and share. The easiest way to start a blog is by using WordPress.com.

 Search for some TED talks on the subject area. They’re short and concise but also investigate a complex idea in some depth. They’re also usually pretty easy to understand so (hopefully) won’t take too much deciphering!

 Ask your teachers for recommendations. They’ll be able to guide you towards something they know you’ll find interesting that isn’t on the curriculum – remember, they’ve probably got a degree in the subject themselves!

 Prove your interest in the subject by doing an EPQ (Extended Project Qualification)! Some universities will lower your grade entry requirements if you do well in your EPQ, but others will just take it as confirmation that you are an active researcher of the subject you have chosen. This could also be a great opportunity to combine your interest in your different A Level subjects, by writing an essay that incorporates all of them to some degree.

* This might be the first (and last) time someone brings up a Zac Efron film in a guide to personal statements, but I’m delighted that my book will have this accolade. Zac and I actually share a birthday – sadly the only thing we have in common …

10 tips to ace your A Levels

Before you go to university, you’ve got to earn your place there, and it’ll probably be one of the most intense periods of study you’ll ever have to endure. However, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and that light looks like a three-month summer and a whole lot of celebrating, so hang on in there. With a bit of determination and dedication, there’s nothing stopping you from achieving those grades, so put in the work today and you’ll be thanking yourself when you arrive at your dream uni in Freshers’ Week. Here are 10 things you can start doing right now to boost your grades …

1 Plan Your Revision: I used to make a timetable at the start of each day, which broke the time down into 15-minute slots. That way, I knew exactly what I needed to be doing and when – the more specific, the better. Examples would be spending 45 minutes making flash cards about DNA for Biology, then an hour making mind maps about each character in a book you’re studying for English, then 15 minutes spent going back over the flash cards you made on DNA. That’s two hours of focused work with specific goals that you can tick off. My plans always had columns for the time and the activity, and then a tick box. Ticking things off makes me feel so much more productive somewhere in my brain and motivates me to keep working and ticking away like a clock. Make sure you also tick off things like breaks, having breakfast or even just dragging yourself out of bed, because those are vital as well. Being productive doesn’t always mean working yourself to exhaustion – it means working yourself efficiently and effectively. With this in mind, also be realistic. For instance, if you get home from school at 4 p.m., you’re not very likely to want to start studying straight away, so give yourself some time to just chill.

2 Plan Your Answers: For written answers, which occur in pretty much every subject in some capacity (including more sciencey subjects), planning your essay or answer in advance will make it so much more concise, accurate and coherent. Before exam season rears its ugly head, make essay plans or check past papers to see what wording is always referenced, and mirror it in your answers. Mark schemes for subjects like Biology, Chemistry and Physics are usually looking for you to reference very specific words and specialist vocabulary, so practise using them and plan your potential answers. For humanities subjects, making practice essay plans for potential questions makes you realise where the gaps in your knowledge are, and can help perfect the structure of your arguments. Also, write out a basic version of the plan on your exam paper and keep referring back to it as you answer the question. I remember my history teacher (who was an exam marker) saying that whenever she opened the exam paper of a random candidate and saw a plan, it made her instantly think that person was organised, well prepared and focused. So psychologically she was already expecting the answer to be good. This could really work in your favour and wow the examiner straight off the bat. Honestly, just trick them into thinking you’re clever.

3 Set Short-term Goals: Having the goal of ‘revise for this exam’ is great, but you can break that down much, much further. Grab an A4 sheet of paper and bullet point a list of all the things you want to do before that exam to revise for it, being as specific as possible (make mind maps on the process of mitosis; create flash cards to make sure I remember the names of each step; draw a big diagram so I can visually remember it, etc.). Instead of saying ‘make notes from the textbook’, divide up the book into blocks of 10 pages, so every time you make notes on a set of 10 pages you feel like you’ve actually achieved something. It’s like building a skyscraper and feeling a sense of accomplishment for each new floor that is built, rather than only celebrating once it’s 500 metres tall. I also find it useful to focus on individual topics for a week at a time, so that I really focus on them, instead of having my finger in more pies than Paul Hollywood.

4 Block Your Distractions: You’re not a revision robot who can just turn on ‘focus mode’ like Buzz Lightyear’s Spanish setting – you’re a human being. So, realistically, distractions will arise. However, there are ways of preventing this. There’s a phone app called Forest, which grows a tree for the amount of time you’re aiming to study for, and if you use your phone during that time then it kills off the tree. This sounds silly, but, trust me, it’s tree-mendous. Alternatively, there’s an application you can download to your computer called Self Control, which blacklists websites for a set time period – meaning you won’t even be able to load up social-media sites. If you can’t stop playing your Xbox, give your parents the remote and tell them you’re going to revise – because the pain of having to admit that you’ve been defeated by temptation and want the controller back will be far worse than just doing the revision. I definitely believe in the maxim ‘Out of sight, out of mind’, so if my phone is physically far away from me (my most common hiding spot is inside a box of cereal) then the effort of going all the way downstairs to retrieve it just to check my Instagram feed (which always turns into at least half an hour of mindless scrolling) just isn’t worth it.

5 Condense and Condense Again: Create your own revision resource by condensing down all your research and notes into your own folders or notepads, and then condense that down again into just the vital information you need to memorise. One thing I did that really helped me out was to make an ‘information bank’ – and this can be used for most subjects. This breaks down a whole textbook into just the vital bits you need to lodge into your brain and makes it all feel a lot more manageable. This technique is particularly good for exams that require you to learn quotes or case studies, such as Law, Politics, Psychology or English. I’d create a table on a Word document, which has different columns with the headings: Source/Person, Quote/Idea, Theme and Analysis. Always make sure you add in that section at the end for analysis, so you’re constantly encouraging yourself to think critically, as this is what will boost you into the top tier of grades. Then, turn these crucial bits of info into flash cards, index cards and mind maps to help you remember them.

6 Efficient Revision Is More Important than Time Spent Revising: Why spend two hours reading from a textbook, when you could spend 30 minutes making, and then revising from, flash cards? The latter will be so much more productive and time efficient, and your brain will be much more active – and therefore more likely to absorb the information rather than merely skimming over a black hole of words. One way to use flash cards effectively is to sort them out into different piles, depending on how well you know them. Initially all of them start in a ‘revise every day’ pile. If there are flash cards that you’re consistently answering correctly, they move up into a ‘revise every other day’ pile. If you’re getting them right every other day, they move up into ‘revise once a week’, and then eventually ‘revise the night before the exam’. If you get a flash card wrong – even once – move it all the way back to the beginning, so you’re revising it every day again. This means you’re spending more time focusing on the things that aren’t quite sticking, rather than wasting time going over flash cards you know like the back of your hand. Work smarter, not harder.

7 Not Everything Has to Be Neat: As a self-confessed ‘neat freak’, I know full well how many of us like to have our revision notes looking tidy. However, let that go for a minute, because it could be tripping you up and causing you to land with your face in the dirt. And that dirt looks very much like ‘not knowing the answers in the exam’. Get a blank scrap of paper, make a mind map, pick a subject, and then just scrawl everything you know about that topic. Draw arrows, make connections, make it scruffy, and give yourself time to just think. Eventually, everything will click into your brain. In your exam you need to be critical and analytical, identifying connections and contrasts between ideas – so practise it now! Once you’ve had this initial brain dump, make a neat version where you consolidate everything. Just call yourself Hannah Montana, because you’ve got the best of both worlds, my friend.

8 Find Your Study Space: I know for a fact that I can’t work in my room because I’m just not as efficient or productive there. Instead, I use local libraries because I like to work in silence to really focus, but a lot of my friends find the buzz of a café a healthy working environment, too. Working in a location where lots of other people are studying is incredibly conducive, because the general atmosphere of hard work all around you encourages you to do the same. Even the act of leaving the house and going somewhere to revise gives you purpose, and once you’ve put in that amount of effort, you might as well put in the work to make it worthwhile.

9 Teach Yourself as You Go: The main difference between my first and second year of sixth form – aside from slightly more facial hair and a lot less sleep – was that I did a lot more independent learning and research in my second year. Your school will probably have ample resources both in their library and online, but I’d particularly recommend the ‘review’ journals (Geography Review, Physics Review, Politics Review, etc.), which are specifically targeted at an A Level-student audience. Check out local libraries, or request that your school subscribes to these magazines, as they’ll be super useful. Also, when you do this work, make notes on it for future reference. Even though you think you will, you won’t remember everything you read, so make bullet-pointed lists to refer back to. Not only will this improve your time in lessons because you’ll have interesting thoughts or opinions to share, but it’ll also be incredibly helpful and time efficient when exam season comes over the hill.

10 Look After Yourself: You need to make sure that you’re doing okay before you even think about pushing yourself to work for another hour. Your life doesn’t have to stop just because of exam season, so take time out for yourself and continue doing the things you love. Running, climbing or swimming are great because time spent doing those activities is time where your brain is completely focused on something outside of revision. Take days off, and don’t push yourself to the point of burnout – because that’s actually less productive, even if you are spending hours slaving over your laptop. Work hard, yes, but look after yourself, too. You’ve got this and it’ll all be over soon, I promise. Good luck!

Preparing for results day

Judgment Day is here, and it’s time to face the music. Lots of people will tell you to bubble-wrap yourself in positive energy and soak yourself in good vibes because ‘don’t worry, there’s nothing you can do about it now’ – like, yes, Karen, I know that … and the fact that I can’t do anything about it is what’s freaking me out.

If you, like me, find results day very daunting and intimidating, then you’ve probably got your excuses in early: I accidentally wrote my paper in blue ink so they refused to mark it; oops, I wrote someone else’s name and candidate number; maybe someone copied my correct answers and we both got disqualified …? Either that, or you’re going to attempt to convince your parents that D stands for ‘Definitely have a bright future ahead of you’, F stands for ‘Future looks bright’ and U stands for ‘University is your next step’.

So here, I want to give you some more practical tips about preparing for results day, and to have a proper, honest chat about it.

First and foremost, it’s important to remember that no matter what happens or what numbers are printed on that sheet of A4 paper, you have achieved something. You have survived a really difficult, mentally taxing year and made it to this point. You have achieved your grades and the qualifications they provide you with. Don’t you dare forget that.

The thing about results day is that it’s really just results morning – or results five minutes if all goes to plan. However, there’s a lot of horrible anticipation in the build-up, so I think it’s important to make sure you have a good plan for the day. Organise to meet with friends in the evening or do something with your family, so you have plans you can actually look forward to. Also, don’t cut out your normal habits just because results day is happening – give yourself a sense of normality by keeping your routine as ordinary as you can. Have the same breakfast you’d normally eat, go to bed at your usual time the night before. Give yourself some sense of normality among the chaos.

Think about what grades you will be satisfied with, because ultimately this day is about you and no one else. Social media will always be saturated with success stories, and there’s always that one pair of gleaming twins on BBC Breakfast who have somehow done seven A Levels each and got A*s in all of them. Make sure you know what you’re hoping for, and what you’ll be pleased with before celebratory Instagram posts start to litter your timeline. It’s not about what your best friend got, or what your older siblings got, or what your mum’s cousin’s hamster’s previous owner’s son-in-law got. It’s about you.

Also, be mindful. What you might consider a ‘fail’ or a bad mark could be someone else’s dream grade. Everyone is on their own path and striving for their own goals, so there’s no need for comparison. Focus on yourself, and let others do the same.

One thing I would recommend is conjuring up a contingency plan. I know it sounds a bit like tempting fate, but I’d really recommend making an account on the UCAS Clearing page, downloading the Clearing app and writing down the phone numbers for your prospective university’s admissions office. You don’t want to be frantically googling alternatives at 9.05 a.m. after the results come out, so make sure you know who you need to contact if anything goes slightly awry.

Equally, make sure you know what your alternatives are. Could you retake your exams and defer your application? Would you be interested in taking a gap year and reapplying next year once you know what grades you’re working with? Would your skills be best utilised in a more practical environment? Now is the time to think about it!

Maybe you’ll find that you actually did really well in a subject you weren’t expecting. Know that results day isn’t too late to have a change of heart and change universities or even courses. One of my friends decided to change what degree she was going to study, from economics to fashion, and has been thriving on her course ever since. You’ve got to make sure you’re doing what makes you happy and utilising your unique skillset.

When it comes to opening the envelope of terror, make sure you open it in an environment you feel comfortable in, among people you feel comfortable with. Have a good support system around you, where there’s no sense of competition, guilt or unwarranted stress.

Above all, good luck! I hope results day goes exactly the way you’re hoping it will, and if not, then I promise everything will fall into place for you eventually. I’ve got everything crossed for you.

Dealing with rejection (spoiler alert: it’s going to be okay)

One of life’s cruellest lessons is that sometimes not everything works out in the picture-perfect way you planned in your head. Not everyone will recognise the potential you know you have, the commitment and dedication you know you can provide, or the gift you know you possess. And that’s tough, even heartbreaking, so let’s not pretend for another second that it isn’t.

When I was rejected by my dream university, I collapsed into myself, like a wilting flower or an expectant hand recoiling after someone aired my high-five. I felt like a failure, like I’d let everyone around me down, that I’d embarrassed myself for even trying. That I deserved rejection, or that karma was finally coming to bite me in the arse for not forwarding on that chainmail in 2011. I had it coming, right? I needed a reason, or an excuse, and couldn’t find one that existed outside of the four walls of my own capabilities. So I just deflated like a balloon and wallowed in a swamp of self-pity and introspection, feeling stupid, hopeless and just a bit silly, really. But then I decided that I had to be okay. Because there was no other option.

Before you do that, however, allow yourself to feel the pain – and really feel it. Experience it. Understand it. Don’t blame yourself for being susceptible to human emotions, and give yourself time to come to terms with it. Rejection can feel like a loss in some ways, because it’s a specific door closing, and probably one you’d hoped would be held open for you. Just think of the phrases we use to describe rejection: a kick in the teeth; a slap in the face; a serious blow; a punch in the gut. All these idioms and platitudes liken the sensation of rejection to physical pain, because that is how humans respond to it. It’s normal, and it’s okay.

In fact, Guy Winch’s book Emotional First Aid reports that rejection is such a strong emotion that the body registers the sensation as if it were physical pain. Brain scans have revealed that the two sensations even manifest themselves in identical regions of the brain, and so rejection rears its ugly head in both a visceral and physical way. In a ball-tossing experiment depicted in Winch’s study, three strangers in a waiting room start throwing a ball among themselves, until one is deliberately excluded from the game by the other players, who were really just (evil) scientists in disguise. The person who found themselves in an unwitting game of piggy-in-the-middle reported feeling deep pain at the moment of recognition that they had been rejected by the others. Those given Tylenol (a pain-relief drug) experienced this feeling to a lesser extent, and yet the drug was ineffective at relieving other emotions like embarrassment. Rejection is like a physical pain, and if there are people in lab coats backing up that claim then I’m not here to question it.

The point is this: rejection appears to be the most ostensible manifestation of failure in our lives, and it really doesn’t discriminate. No one gets a get-out-of-jail-free card, and yet there’s no way of preparing for it or softening the blow. But rejection isn’t the end of the road, and it’s certainly not one big epic fail. Rejection is redirection, and a route to different opportunities. It’s a chance to have a fresh start, to re-evaluate and come back stronger. Learn from it, take it on the chin and improve. Know more next time.

Also, don’t take rejection too personally. Remember that what one person perceives as your ‘weakness’, another person will deem to be your greatest strength. When Anna Wintour was fired from a magazine job because the editor at the time thought her shoots were too edgy, that editor didn’t know that she’d later be crossing her fingers for Wintour, now editor-in-chief of American Vogue, to bless her with a Met Gala invite. When Oprah Winfrey was fired from a Baltimore broadcaster for being too empathetic and emotionally involved with her interviewees, she didn’t know that this perceived ‘weakness’ would later make her a billionaire. When U2 were declined by RSO Records, they never would’ve believed they could go on to sell 170 million records worldwide, or have the heaviest mantelpiece ever, since it’s decorated with 22 Grammys.

For most of us, minor rejections probably won’t lead to 14 studio albums, but that’s beside the point. The true tragedy would be to give up trying, or to crumble entirely and let the rejection overwhelm us or make us settle for less. Being rejected from my ‘dream’ university led me down a different path, to a different university and a different experience. To a place which has allowed me to thrive. To a university I now adore. In fact, this book wouldn’t exist without that rejection, and I can honestly say that if Doctor Who appeared in the TARDIS right now with the offer to go back in time and change it all, I’d let time play out in exactly the way it did. Because I’m better for it. Because I needed rejection to be where I am now. (Although I would still take up the opportunity to have a ride in the TARDIS and maybe give Henry VIII’s wives the heads-up.*)

Rejection will happen in our lives, and that’s okay. In fact, in a weird, twisted, messed-up kind of way, it’s necessary.

That said, in the context of applying to university (that’s what this book is all about, after all), don’t let fear of rejection stop you from applying to the places you dream of. They may feel unattainable or impossible, but if you never try, you’ll never know. It’s important to remember that there are always options, be it Clearing,† Adjustment,‡ a gap year or second choices, so you’ll be all right. Keep pushing and remember who you are. You’ll thank yourself in six months’ time.

Now you’ve accepted and embraced it, it’s time to dust yourself off, reset and come back stronger. Time to prove ’em wrong and become one of those success stories we spoke about earlier.

* Giving Henry VIII’s wives the heads-up is probably the most insensitive use of the English language ever, since two of them were literally beheaded. Sorry about that, Anne and Cath.

† Clearing is the process by which you can still go to university, even if you didn’t meet the offer your firm-choice university gave you.

‡ Adjustment is essentially the opposite of Clearing: when you do better than you expected to, and move to a university with higher entry requirements.

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