Daring Devotion
Elaine Overton

www.millsandboon.co.uk

To George,

The strength of a Grizzly,

and the heart of a Teddy.

Never change

Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Epilogue

Chapter 1

Firehouse Fifteen

Detroit, Michigan

“Hail to the Chief!”

Andrea Chenault sat quietly with a smile frozen on her face. She sat beside her fiancé, Calvin Brown, more lovingly known by his friends as Big Cal, and listened in wooden silence as he was saluted and cheered on his recent promotion to Firehouse Chief.

In the midst of the lively celebration, Andrea’s mind was swirling with doubt and turmoil regarding the future of her engagement.

Feeling Cal’s eyes dart across her face, she took a sip of soda, studying the pretty design on the side of the Dixie paper cup to avoid making eye contact as Dwight Johnston, their friend and Cal’s fellow fireman, continued his toast.

What Cal’s engine team members saw as nothing more than the culmination of a lifetime of hard work and commitment, Andrea saw as an omen of bad things to come.

Dwight lifted his paper cup in salute. “It couldn’t have happened to a better man. Here’s to Big Cal!”

Cheerful affirmatives came from the men and women crowded around the table in the small firehouse kitchen. Andrea could only hope that no one noticed that the one person who should’ve been happiest for Cal was unable to muster even a fraction of enthusiasm.

Others rose and offered their own congratulations, many recounting events in which Cal had proven his heroism, and there was also the occasional funny story until eventually their celebration dinner evolved into an impromptu roast.

Andrea tried not to watch the clock, but she was really uncertain as to how much more of the incessant merriment she could take. Consciously, she toyed with the engagement ring on her finger, twisting it back and forth as her mind ran away with the possibilities. A large, warm hand covered hers and stopped the motion of the ring. She looked up into Cal’s concerned brown eyes.

What’s wrong? he silently pleaded, and Andrea just shook her head in answer, hoping he would not push.

“Speech! Speech!” the crowd cried for some words from their new leader.

With one more look in Andrea’s general direction, Cal slowly unbent his large frame from the table, and Andrea felt the same tinkling sensation in the pit of her stomach that she felt every time she took in his exceptional form.

At six feet, four inches, Calvin Brown was a three hundred-pound slab of solid granite, covered in a top layer of milk chocolate skin. Although he’d been a fireman his entire adult life, he was often mistaken as a professional body builder by strangers. His perfectly sculpted body was the product of years of weight lifting and various training programs. He took great pride in his ability to lift twice his own weight.

Although Cal was a large man, his size was not what made him unique. It was the strength and brawn that could be felt in the slightest handshake, and yet, despite his size, he moved with the agility of a dancer. And had an innately gentle nature that told you that his strength would never be misused.

He tapped the side of his paper cup with a plastic spoon in a dramatic gesture to gain everyone’s attention, and the room quieted down.

“I know many of you may be wondering if this promotion will change me in any way,” he began with a solemn expression. “I would just like to state for the record that now that I am your chief, I am still the Big Cal you’ve always known and loved.”

Cal continued his speech, despite the laughter in the background. “Now, I know some of you may be bitter…” the group laughed again, “but believe me, the forces that be picked the best man or woman for the job and you’ll just have to get over it.”

Ignoring the playful hoots and boos, Cal smiled graciously, exposing one his few physical imperfections, the two front teeth that slightly overlapped his bottom ones.

Instead of finding it unattractive, Andrea had loved his bucktoothed smile from the moment she saw it. She always thought it gave his face a boyish appeal.

He cleared his throat loudly to be heard over the laughter and noise. “As I was saying, this promotion will not change the man I am.” He paused thoughtfully. “But, in regards to work assignments, I would like to add that I am open to flattery, and not above bribery.”

The group roared in laughter.

Andrea’s eyes scanned the room seeing nothing but smiling faces filled with genuine admiration and respect. She knew in their own way, these people loved him as much as she did. And yet, collectively, she couldn’t help but see them as the enemy. Her primary point of contention as far as she could see was that the thing they loved and admired most about him was the one thing Andrea wished she could change.

Unable to stand it any longer, Andrea whispered in Cal’s ear that she was going to the bathroom. She quickly hurried out of the room, never knowing Cal’s eyes followed her until she disappeared through the doorway.

Once outside in the hallway, she leaned her back against the wall and took a deep breath. She never realized how exhausting holding a fake smile for hours could be. She heard someone ask Cal if she was okay, but she could not make out Cal’s murmured response through the thick wall. Taking another deep breath, she started down the hall, hoping that a splash of water on her face would help hold back the tears that now seemed to threaten her constantly.

A few minutes later, as she stood at the sink patting her face dry, she silently scolded the woman in the mirror. This is the happiest day of his life and you are going to ruin it for him. Pull yourself together!

She glanced down at the small diamond ring on her finger, and her hand went to it instinctively as she remembered just how many times over the past week she’d taken it off and put it back on.

She pulled it off once more, enclosed it in her small fisted hand. “I’m not this strong,” she whispered, imagining the day her telephone would ring and there would be a composed, very professional voice at the other end informing her of their regret…

She turned and leaned her back against the sink. As a nurse, Andrea had seen more death than most people saw in a lifetime, and many of those were lives that seemed to be snuffed out before their time.

She’d stood over the body of more than one firefighter as the line on the ventilator went flat, and found it far too easy to imagine Cal as the firefighter on the table.

“I’m not strong enough to be a fireman’s wife.” But despite her words, she found herself sliding the little ring back onto her finger. She only hoped she could hide her dismay long enough to get through the afternoon.

She checked her appearance in the mirror before she opened the door and found herself facing an expanse of black T-shirt stretched across a wide, muscular chest.

Closing her eyes, Andrea breathed in his familiar scent of soap and Speed Stick deodorant. Cal almost never wore cologne, and Andrea found that she preferred it that way. His own natural scent was enough of an aphrodisiac by itself.

“What’s wrong?” Cal’s deep baritone voice was softened by his concern.

Her eyes went up and up until they settled on soft brown eyes filled with concern. She tried to force a smile, but when she felt the tears welling up, she quickly looked away.

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“Don’t lie to me.” His tone never changed, but there was something very threatening in the words themselves. “You look like you’re about to cry.”

She shook her head fervently. “No, I’m okay. We better get back to the group—they’re going to wonder where the guest of honor disappeared to.” She moved to go around him, and he easily blocked her path.

“They can wait.” Using his index finger, he lifted her chin, and although she managed to keep her eyes downcast, the tiny drop of water that fell on her cheek betrayed her.

She heard his sharp gasp right before he pulled her into a rough embrace. “Baby, why are you crying? Tell me.”

She eagerly wrapped her arms around his rock-hard midsection and held on with all her might. Not yet ready to share the truth…that she was seriously considering giving him back his ring because she could not bear to be his widow.

Holding him in her arms proved to be too much. Faced with the possibility of having to let him go, the water began coursing down her face.

“Andrea, you’re going to have to tell me, I can’t read your mind. What’s got you so upset?”

She pressed her face against his shirt and tried to stifle the flood of tears. She wasn’t ready to say the words. Not yet…not yet.

The loud, buzzing sound that signaled an emergency call reverberated throughout the firehouse, and without hesitation Cal set Andrea away from him. With one quick peck on her forehead, he whispered the words “You know what to do.” And then he was gone.

Andrea stood in the deserted hallway, listening to the quiet firehouse come to life around her. Cal was right. After a year of being his girlfriend and fiancée, Andrea did know what to do.

He’d trained her in civilian procedure and protocol during an emergency as well as he trained his engine team to respond. They even ran through the occasional drill.

Andrea knew everything she needed to know to be a fireman’s wife…except how to stop the uncontrollable shaking she felt take over her body every time the firehouse alarm rang. She turned and hurried back along the hall, trying to focus on the task assigned to her, and not the danger Cal was rushing into.

Once the corridor was quiet, the man crouching in the shadows stepped out from his hiding place. Jeff Collins looked in both directions before heading down the back stairway toward the soon departing engine truck.

Nothing would appear more suspicious than for him to not be on the truck when it pulled away from the firehouse. For a moment, he’d been extremely worried, wondering if the woman would stand there until it was too late, but finally she’d moved off down the hall.

When Cal got up and left the table, Jeff Collins had followed, curious to see what would transpire between the couple. His lips tightened as he remembered the sadness in Andrea’s eyes as Cal was praised and toasted. Jeff was no happier to see Cal get the promotion than Andrea.

His fist balled at his side as he remembered how close he’d come to being the one toasted and praised. It just wasn’t fair. He and Cal had been equals since entering the firefighter academy fifteen years ago, both at the tender age of nineteen. They’d both had distinguished careers. So, why, when it came time to pass out the promotions, was Cal the only man to get one?

Over the past five years, Jeff Collins had maneuvered his way through the ranks, manipulating and cajoling his way up the professional ladder, only to have the prize stolen out from under him in the eleventh hour. Calvin Brown had stolen his promotion.

A promotion, a beautiful fiancée…it just wasn’t fair. He slipped on his turn-out gear and swung up into the truck just as the garage door began lifting.

“Where the hell have you been?” Cal’s voice boomed, drowning out even the sound of the horn warning.

Jeff fought to hide his anger, and swallowed hard. “Sorry, got hung up.”

“Don’t let it happen again.” Cal slammed the front wall to signal the driver that everyone was aboard. “Let’s go.”

Without further warning, the truck began to pull forward, maneuvering its way through the traffic that had come to a complete halt.

Jeff focused on the view of the city flying by, while Cal conversed with Dwight. At times like this, it took everything in him to hide the growing hatred he felt for the man he’d once considered a friend.

Chapter 2

The heat was suffocating. Flames of orange, red and gold danced around him in menacing cadence, teasing and taunting mercilessly. But nothing could sway Cal’s attention from the small figure clutching the wall on the other side of the room.

When he’d first spotted the child, he could not believe his eyes. It was Marco, one of the many neighborhood children who hung around the firehouse with hero worship in their young eyes. Cal hadn’t seen him in several days, but now here he was in the midst of an out-of-control blaze in the abandoned Hadley Building, a condemned former office complex in the heart of downtown.

Cal took in the gaping hole in the center of the floor as his mind constructed a way around it. “Hang on, Marco, I’m coming!” He slid slowly to the right, trying not to disturb the fragile, burnt wood surrounding the hole. If it got any bigger, he would never reach the other side.

“Cal? Cal is that you?” Marco lifted his head from his crouched position, recognizing the voice of the firefighter. “Help me, Cal!”

“I’m coming, little man, just hang on!”

He moved with care and precision, his eyes darting between the opening in the floor and the small, terrified creature on the other side.

By the time he was twelve years old, Cal was as tall and broad as an average sized adult male. An anomaly that had been both a blessing and curse. His size had kept the bullies at bay—after all, no one challenged a six foot seventh grader—but he also realized that he did not fit in the usual places that kids his age did, and soon became the butt of jokes and teasing.

To counter what he felt was his own clumsiness, he became very conscious of his movements. Even now, he could almost move with the stealth of a ninja. This skill had served him well in his line of work, especially at times like this when a lack of movement was critical to success.

Moving along the wall, he came to a corner and edged around it until there was only a small space that he had to cross in order to reach Marco. He shifted on the ball of his left foot to leap across the gaping abyss. He made the leap and landed only inches from Marco, but behind him the floor disappeared, burning away until only six inches of floor remained behind him.

He scooped the feather-light child up in his arms, and turned to put his back against the wall. He surveyed his options, and realized there were none. He could not go back the way he’d come because the cavity in the floor had widened so that it was almost impossible to cross. Even if they made it, the surrounding wood was so fragile it probably would not support their weight.

On his other side, the fire was eating its way through anything in its path and heading straight for them. Cal knew then that he had no choice but to try to leap across the opening, and hope that they made it. The only other option would be wait for the fire to consume them.

He shifted the boy around so he could look at his face. “Marco, I’m going to put you on my back. I need to have my hands free to hang on once we make the jump.”

“Jump?”

Hearing the panic in his voice, Cal knew he had to act quickly, before the boy had a chance to scare himself into refusing to cooperate. He pushed his small body around and over his shoulder, didn’t have to tell him to hang on. Marco was already clinging to him like a spider monkey.

“No matter what, don’t let go!” Cal said, taking the fateful leap just seconds before the flames covered the wall they’d been leaning against.

The next few seconds happened so slowly, Cal felt as if he were experiencing some kind of a weird dream. He could see the ledge on the other side, and then suddenly it was no longer there and they were free falling through space.

Down into the abyss of a swirling river of flames that covered the lower levels of the building. Suddenly, Cal felt something clamp down hard on the collar of his rubber jacket, and he realized he was suspended in midair.

“Hang on, Cal! I’ve got you!” Even muffled by her oxygen mask, Cal recognized the voice of Marty, the only female member of the team.

He felt himself being towed upward, one inch—stop. The movement started again, another half inch—then, one hard yank. She relaxed her stance to catch her breath, and her heavy burden slipped back down three inches.

“Get the boy!” Cal called, his voice infused with fear as he felt the boy’s tight little clawlike nails losing their hold. “He’s slipping! Get the boy first!”

Marty reached over his shoulder and lifted the small burden. The child went willingly as Marty sat him behind her. Then she went back to trying to lift the much heavier man.

Cal felt his spirit plummet. Marty was more than capable of pulling her weight—but not his. Cal could feel himself slipping even more, slowly and steadily out of her sweaty grip. He knew that as sure as the sun rose in the morning, Marty would never let go of him, which meant she would go over the side with him. He couldn’t let that happen.

“Let me go, Marty!” he shouted through his fogged mask. “Let me go!”

“No!”

He came up an inch.

“No!”

He came up another inch. Trembling with the effort, she relaxed her exhausted muscles just a fraction, and he slipped back down a half inch.

She can’t do it, Cal thought, and somehow, someway, he had to make her let him go.

He looked down into the nothingness beneath him. The wide opening of burnt wood that spiraled down at least twenty feet left him feeling as if he were staring into hell. Instantly he realized he’d made a critical mistake.

A swirling hell…vertigo.

“Take the boy and get out of here!” he shouted, but when he felt her continuing to pull, he knew he was being ignored.

His head felt light, as beads of sweat popped out on his face beneath his oxygen mask. Without thought, his large feet began swinging back and forth trying to find purchase on one of the many, jagged levels that had not burned completely away. He knew he should’ve just held still, but panic had taken hold of his brain.

“Cal, stop! I’m losing you!”

The fire burned below, the orange and red flames dancing in anticipation of the feast of flesh it was about to devour. The heat surrounding him, inside and outside of his suit had him near fainting, something he’d never done in his entire life.

The tip of one foot reached a small, solid foundation just another inch below him. He experimented with putting pressure on the surface. Cal was certain if he could just get his foot firmly on the small, unburned portion of the next level, he could get clear of the opening.

He pushed his body in the direction he wanted to go. His only consolation was that if this did not work, the fall would kill him before the fire ever reached him. Even in death, he refused to give the monster its due.

Cal’s foot touched on the landing just as the wood surrendered to the inferno. His body slid and scraped along the jagged edge until his fingers hooked onto something that felt like a handle and he broke the fall. Using both hands to hold, he tried to lift his heavy form up and over the ledge. Even though the edge had broken away, most of the charred landing was still in place.

As Cal hung dangling from the edge, he realized it was times like this when a man would be tempted to question God. Death at the hands of the very monster he’d spent his life working to defeat just didn’t seem right.

And what about Andrea? He could clearly see her beautiful face. Big brown eyes filled with more compassion than he’d ever imagined existed. Her golden-brown skin. Her cute little upturned nose and full lips. He’d waited his whole life for a woman like her and now he would lose her, as well. He should’ve married her a year ago, when he first proposed. Why had he waited so long?

“Cal! You down there?” He heard a man’s muffled voice coming from somewhere above. It was Dwight. Marty had gone for help. Cal could sense more than see the group of firefighters peering over the edge a few feet above. He was too exhausted to speak, but he had to find the strength, otherwise his team would believe him dead.

“Yeah, I’m still here,” he called back and tried to lift his weight over the edge.

“Hang on! We’re coming!” Dwight called down into the opening.

Cal tried to lift his body again, and managed to get his left shoulder up over the edge. He hung, listening to the crackling wood and running feet. The feeling of helplessness was a new sensation. And not a pleasant one, Cal thought.

This blaze was probably the worst they’d seen in some time, and the closest he’d ever come to meeting the Grim Reaper. Cal felt large, strong arms clamp around his torso and start to pull him up. Then other hands grabbed the back of his jacket and hauled him over the edge. Tommy took him under the arms while Jeff grabbed his legs and pulled up and over. The pair quickly rolled his large body back away from the edge.

“We’ve got him!”

From somewhere in the distance, he heard Dwight calling. “Let’s go! I can’t hold it much longer. Let’s go!” Dwight had been busy trying to secure an exit route for his team.

“Where’s Marco?” He looked in every direction, before noticing the small bundle tucked in Marty’s arms.

Braced between Jeff and Tommy, Cal used his own legs to run out of the building, despite his dizziness and nausea. A rhythmic bumping noise behind them signaled the others had caught up.

Following the path made by Dwight, the group quickly found the back entrance and exited into the empty alley. In the distance Cal could see the lights of an ambulance flashing, as well as the firemen’s ladder truck, and a couple of police vehicles. He found himself being twisted this way and that as Marty satisfied herself that her friend was still in one piece. The sound of scanners and radios were emanating from every direction.

Jeff tried to help guide him to the paramedics, who were now coming down the long alley to meet them halfway. Cal allowed the man to brace him as he watched the world spinning around him.

Cal took off his helmet and mask and shook his head hard, trying to dispel the feeling of vertigo that seemed to be lingering. He felt more than a little nauseous, and pushed Jeff away as he felt himself becoming sick.

Before the paramedics reached them, Cal turned toward the brick wall, and shielded himself as best as he could while emptying his stomach, his head spinning, his stomach churning. His friends closed in with worried expressions.

Unable to stand any longer, Cal leaned his back against the wall and hung his head in complete exhaustion.

He heard the paramedics quietly discussing the best way to transport their large victim. Then the stretcher appeared and Cal was laid out across it. He closed his eyes to stop the white clouds from spinning overhead.

“We’ll meet you at the hospital.” He heard Dwight in the distance. With his other team members wishing him well, the paramedics rolled Cal back to the ambulance and loaded him.

As the doors on the vehicle closed and Cal heard the siren sound, he silently wondered what was wrong with him. He’d been prone long enough to have regained some sense of equilibrium. But still he felt as if the world was spinning around him and he had no gravity.

He watched the technicians go about their routine, inserting the IV and dispensing the necessary medications. He answered their questions as best he could with head shakes and nods. He took a deep breath and decided that whatever was wrong would soon correct itself. He was Big Cal, nothing kept him down for long, not even a near-death experience.

He closed his eyes and thanked God for another miracle, the latest in a long line. His mind went to Andrea. He desperately needed to see her, to hold her, to know that she was real because that would mean that he was real. That he was still alive in all the ways that mattered.

Chapter 3

“Cal.” Andrea scooted up on her knees to use her full strength to rock the man beside her as he thrashed about wildly on the bed. “Cal!” She ducked, barely missing a swinging arm. “Cal! Wake up!” She pushed hard against his tense form. “Wake up!”

Large eyes opened in bewilderment. “What?” Cold brown eyes turned to her and the lack of recognition sent a chill down her spine.

“It was a nightmare.” She rubbed her hand along his jawbone. “You were having another nightmare.”

He looked in every direction seemingly surprised to find himself in her bed. Finally his troubled eyes settled on her again just before he ran his large hand over his face.

It had been almost a month since the fire in the Hadley building, and something deep inside of Cal had changed. Andrea sensed it and saw it in his behavior. In the past few days, Andrea had seen something she thought she would never see. Her fearless man had become hesitant.

Andrea had met Cal over a year ago, although she remembered it like yesterday. He’d come to visit Marty in the hospital where she was recovering from smoke inhalation. From the moment Andrea saw him, Cal had exuded a kind of larger-than-life confidence, and being the self-doubting person that she was, Andrea had been drawn to that self-assuredness. She’d known instinctively that he was everything she’d never known she needed, water to her parched soul.

Over the past year, they’d struggled to find their way through the complex maze of contemporary relationships and had seemingly come to the inevitable conclusion that they belonged together.

When Cal had proposed almost six months ago, her instant answer had been yes. And on that day something strange had happened to Andrea. Something that she was finding harder and harder to deal with. For the first time, she began to contemplate what it meant to be the wife of a firefighter. What she’d discovered was not good.

The never-ending sense of dread. The empty feeling that settled in the pit of her stomach every time he began a seventy-two-hour rotation. The feeling would not go away until he returned to her after a call, safe and sound. And the apprehension had not stopped there. It followed her to work where, as a nurse in the emergency ward, she became more aware of the number of firefighters that came through the E.R.

And on one horrible day, less than a month ago, she’d had her worst fears confirmed when she looked down at the gurney and saw that Cal was the patient. But something strange and wonderful had come out of the experience, something Andrea could not share with anyone, not even Cal. Something she was ashamed to admit gave her such pleasure. Cal had lost his sense of invincibility.

She could remember any number of times she’d been in the firehouse when the emergency call came in and Cal would take off with a sexy grin and the wink of an eye, excited and pumped for the challenge. It was all she could do to wait for him to leave before she dropped to her knees and began to pray. Cal absolutely loved fighting fire.

It was the greatest obstacle in their path and the one thing Andrea thought was unchangeable.

But since the Hadley building fire, that wickedly playful gleam had left his eyes. He’d doubled the drills for his team. He’d become careful, and Andrea knew there was nothing as dangerous as an overly cautious firefighter. Which meant…he’d have to give it up. Now, all she had to do was wait for him to realize it.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked quietly, already knowing the answer before he shook his head and rolled over.

Almost every night he’d spent with her since the accident had been the same. She’d wake him in the middle of a nightmare, and he’d shrug it off as nothing, roll over and go back to sleep.

“Why won’t you talk to me?”

“About what?” he mumbled into the pillow.

“About the fire. About what really happened.”

“I told you a thousand times, baby, nothing happened.”

“Is this…” She hesitated. More than once he’d snapped at her when she attempted to ask questions regarding exactly what happened. “Because of Marco?”

Marco had recently been released from the hospital. He’d had to stay longer than Cal to have a skin graft covering a six-inch patch of burnt skin on his arm. But given what could’ve happened, Andrea thought, the boy had been incredibly blessed.

Of course, Cal had taken full responsibility for that, as well. “You saved his life, Cal, the skin graft was a small price compared to—”

“I don’t want to hear it, Andrea! You weren’t there—you don’t know what you’re talking about!”

A cold silence settled over the dark room.

Sometimes Andrea felt as if she was trying to cuddle up to a wounded bear. She sighed in defeat and turned back over to her side of the bed and snuggled under the covers.

She stared at the wall seeing right through the darkness. She studied the outline of the soft pink watercolor painting of a vase of peonies. Once again, her mind was swirling with conflicting emotions, many of which she knew she shouldn’t feel. Even in the midst of Cal’s crisis some part of her was blossoming with hope. There was no way he could go back to being a firefighter, not in his current state of mind.

And as much as Andrea hurt for him, as much as it pained her to see him in such turmoil, some part of her still preferred it to the who-gives-a-damn way of looking at the world he had before. That attitude was dangerous, reckless, and…ultimately fatal.

After several minutes, Cal turned over to spoon her. His large hand came over her hipbone and settled in the crook of her body. Although Andrea sensed the movement wasn’t meant to be arousing, she had no control over the tinkling sensation that started in her toes and worked its way up her body. It had been that way from the beginning. The most casual skim of his hand, an accidental brush of bodies and she was wired for action.

Cal was the first man she’d ever known who had that kind of effect on her senses, and in her heart she knew he would always be the only one who could.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered in the dark. “I didn’t mean to snap at you like that.”

She sighed. “No, it’s my own fault. As many times as you’ve told me to leave it alone, you think I’d give up.”

He snuggled in closer, wrapping his large body around hers. “Don’t ever give up on me, baby. No matter how much like a jackass I behave.” He squeezed her against him so quickly and so tight Andrea could barely breath, and just as quickly he released his viselike hold. “Don’t ever give up on me.”

Andrea said nothing. His words were too close to her fretful contemplations.

Cal propped himself up on one elbow. “Look, what happened to me is nothing new, it comes with the job. The bad dreams—all that will stop eventually. It’s just that it is still fresh in my mind. I’ll be fine.”

She turned to face him. “So, it has nothing to do with feeling like you failed Marco?”

“Maybe a little. But I’ll get over that, too. I just need some time and your understanding.”

The patient look in his soft brown eyes and his gently spoken words made her brave, and Andrea decided to voice her one hope. “Cal, maybe you should give up firefigh—”

He quickly covered her lips with two fingers. “Shh, don’t even think it.” He chuckled. “Really, I’m going to be okay. Like I said before, it’s just part of the job.”

“But, Cal, if you can’t—”

Suddenly, he reached up and pulled her head down to his, covering her mouth with his own. He quickly kissed her once, just a soft peck as if exploring for her response, and it came quickly when she returned the kiss, but with more conviction.

Looking into her eyes, his full lips spread in a slow smile before his eyes closed and he kissed her again, this time with all the precision and finesse that Andrea had come to expect. Slowly, he shifted their bodies, bearing her back down into the bedding.

Andrea felt his warm, calloused hands on each of her thighs as he worked his way beneath the thin silk teddy she wore. She gave a sharp gasp, feeling his rising bulge against her thigh.

She moaned softly, feeling his hot breath on her neck and then his warm tongue as he nibbled and licked his way down her neck headed straight for her exposed cleavage.

Unable to hold back any longer, Andrea reached out, taking his head between her hands, needing to kiss him again. She needed the familiar taste of his tongue in her mouth and of their own will, her legs fell open.

Cal knew an invitation when one was extended. He lifted himself up to remove his pajama pants and Andrea immediately sat up to help work them down his hips. He chuckled at her anxiousness, and placed his hands over her trembling ones. Leaning forward, he whispered in her ear.

“If you don’t slow down, this is going to be over before it begins.”

Ignoring his words, Andrea pressed her hungry mouth against his rock hard midsection, working her way up his warm, muscular chest and continued pushing the offensive pants down his legs. She desperately needed to get them off of him.

Lifting her arms, she waited impatiently for him to unsnap the teddy and pull it over her head. And then her hands were all over him again.

“You’re so beautiful,” she whined, feeling the ripple of muscles under almost every inch of skin she touched.

Cal gently pushed her back down onto the bed. “No, baby, you are the beautiful one.” Coming over her, Cal braced himself on his elbows, as his penis sought her entrance. He struggled to control his breathing, to slow himself down, but it was hard when her warm, wet opening was reaching for him, trying desperately to draw him inside her body.

Andrea felt her heart beating like crazy when the tip of his penis entered her. She parted her legs as wide as possible, wanting nothing more than for him to drive deep inside of her…when the telephone rang making both of them jump in surprise.

Ignoring it, she reached up and grabbed his hips, trying to pull him inside her before it was too late. She had a pretty good idea of who was calling. Whenever his cell phone was turned off, they called her house. Just one more reason to despise the Detroit Fire Department.

“Hurry, baby, I need you so bad,” she cried, feeling Cal hesitate.

He looked down into her needy eyes, farther down to where their bodies were almost joined, his erection standing at full tilt, then, cursing under his breath, he rolled away from her to answer the phone.

Andrea reacted without thought, slamming her fist against the pillow. “But you’re off duty!” She knew she sounded like a spoiled child, but she couldn’t help it.

“I’m the chief now, Andrea. I have to be available at all times.” He picked up the cordless phone from its base. “Hello?”

His eyes widened and his head swung around to Andrea. Sensing something was terribly wrong, Andrea sat up in the bed as Cal continued the conversation.

“Hello, Mrs. Chenault. Uh, yes, she’s here. Um, just one moment.” He covered the mouthpiece on the receiver. “I’m sorry, baby. What the hell is your mother doing calling here at two in the morning?” he whispered nervously.

Andrea subconsciously glanced at the clock as if to mentally confirm the time. There was only one reason her mother would be calling at that hour.

Taking a deep, fortifying breath, she accepted the phone. “Hi, Mom.”

“Andrea, I’m down at Detroit Receiving Hospital.” Margaret Chenault’s naturally soft voice was fainter than usual, and Andrea struggled to hear her. “I’m sorry to bother you like this, but do you think you can come get me?”

She was already scooting to the edge of the bed. There was no reason to ask why her mother was in the emergency room at two o’clock in the morning, she already knew.

“I’ll be right there.” A few seconds later, she hung up the phone and studiously avoided Cal’s eyes. She went to the dresser and pulled out a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt.

Cal sat on the side of the bed watching her in silence. The amorous mood had completely dissipated.

Finally, when it became obvious Andrea was not going to volunteer any information, he asked the question, already knowing the answer. “He hit her again, didn’t he?”

Andrea was fully dressed and slipping her feet into a pair of sandals. “Yes.” She spoke barely above a whisper.

Instantly Cal was behind her protectively wrapping her in his arms, as if he could physically shield her from the pain. He asked another question that he already knew the answer to. “Can I come with you?”

Andrea dropped her head, and whispered, “No.”

“Why won’t you let me take care of him? Trust me, after I got through with him, he wouldn’t be hitting anybody.” He spoke with complete conviction, and Andrea believed him, which was why she refused his help.

“He’s still my father, Cal.”

Cal rested his chin on the top of her head. “Why you feel any loyalty to him is beyond me. But just so we understand each other, Andrea. If he ever lays a finger on you…all bets are off.”

She reached up and covered the strong arms that circled her body, savoring the feeling of warmth and love she knew she would need to get through the night. “Like I told you before, he’s never hit me. Just her…always her.”

“Why won’t she leave him?” he whispered in frustration.

Andrea’s mind was racing with images from her childhood and well into her adult years. So many memories, most of them not good. “When I have an answer to that question, I’ll tell you.”

Chapter 4

Three women filed into the spa for their monthly standing reservation. Even in the blue funk that Andrea had been experiencing lately, she couldn’t help but get excited about Spa Day.

As soon as they were through the door, the young lady at the counter smiled and greeted them. “Hello, ladies, your suite is ready. Just go on in and Zack will be right with you.”

Andrea followed Marty, who followed Dina through the frosted glass doors and into the long corridor that led to the client’s suites, ignoring the menacing stares of the walk-in clients who’d been waiting hours to get an appointment with the best masseur in Detroit.

The three were settled quickly into their suite by the spa staff. Their clothes had been traded for incredible soft terry robes. Each pair of tired, aching feet was luxuriating in a small whirlpool tub. They sat sipping on the fruity flavored protein drinks they’d been given to pass the time.

Although they had an appointment, they already knew they would be forced to wait, as well, but it was by choice. The spa employed eight masseurs, but unfortunately there was only one Zack, and everyone wanted him.

Spa Day usually took up all of Andrea’s monthly splurge money, but by the time Zack got through kneading and pounding her overworked muscles, somehow she just didn’t care.

Once they were well relaxed, and halfway through their protein shakes, they picked up the conversation that had started in the car.

“It’s perfectly normal to be nervous, Andrea,” Marty said. “You are about to get married—that’s a huge commitment.”

Andrea shook her head in confusion. “It’s more than just that.”

Marty just quirked an eyebrow at her friend. “You love him, right? Nothing else should matter.”

“You don’t understand, Marty,” Dina said. “You’re one of them—when the bell rings you’re on the truck, adrenaline pumping and ready for action. But those of us left behind just waiting and praying, it’s different for us. I bet Cavanaugh understands.”

“Cavanaugh is completely supportive of my career,” she lied, and the other two women just stared at her. Marty stared back, but was unable to keep a straight face. Soon all three women were laughing so loudly the receptionist in the lobby turned her head at the curious noise.

“Okay, okay, maybe he’s not completely supportive, but he understands this is something I have to do.” She pointed a thin finger at Andrea. “And this is something Cal has to do. If you love him, you have to support him.”

Andrea had only recently expressed her concerns to her girlfriends, so torn as to what course of action she should take, she felt she could use some unbiased advice. The problem was that neither of her two closest friends was unbiased.

Marty, who was herself a firefighter, saw things only from the point of view of a firefighter, and Dina, Dwight’s wife of eight years, a seasoned firefighter’s spouse, had nothing but dire warnings regarding the years ahead and often came just short of saying get-out-while-you-can.

It may all be a moot point anyway, Andrea thought, but kept her mouth sealed. These women were like the sisters she never had, but she couldn’t even confide in them about the nightmares Cal had been having. She knew if Cal found out she was spreading his business around, he would see it as nothing less than a betrayal. And of course, he would find out, considering Dina couldn’t keep a secret if you gave it to her under lock and key.

“I don’t know. It’s just some days, I don’t know if I’m cut out to be a fireman’s wife.”

“So, what are you saying? You’re going to call off the wedding?”

Andrea toyed with her ring. “I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“Well, you better be sure before you go breaking Cal’s heart!” Marty snapped defensively.

“Marty!” Dina scowled. “It’s not like the girl don’t have enough guilt without your two cents. Look, Andrea, I understand what you are going through. I went through something similar back when Dwight and I first got married.”

“How did you get through it?”

“What are you talking about—get through? I’m still going through!” Dina half chuckled. “And I will be until he retires.” Dina reached across and touched Andrea’s hand. “Andrea…any sane woman is going to have doubts about marrying a man who wants to run into burning buildings. But despite all my fears and woes, I understood then and now that there is no one I want to grow old with more than Dwight.”

Andrea turned and looked at her. “And what if you never get a chance to grow old together?”

“That is the chance you take. If you can’t handle that you need to let him go now.”

“Look, you could marry a businessman and he gets hit crossing the street one day. Nothing in life is guaranteed.” Marty leaned forward to stress her point. “Andrea, I don’t think you realize that what we do is not just a job, it’s a calling. Honestly, I don’t know if I could do anything else, and I think I can say the same for Cal. This is in our blood—it’s a part of who we are. Can you understand that?”

“Yes, this is why I haven’t asked him to give it up for me.” Andrea, could not resist the urge to offer up a bread crumb of information, to feel them out about the fire that Cal wouldn’t talk about. “But what if…there were circumstances beyond his control? Something that forced him to give it up?”

Dina and Marty gave each other a knowing glance. “Are we talking about what happened in the Hadley building downtown about a month ago?” Dina asked.

Andrea struggled to close her mouth which had fallen open at how quickly they’d figured out her small clue.

What Andrea had not realized yet was that the members of Firehouse Fifteen were as close as a real family. And like any loving family, they tended to stay in each other’s business.

Everyone had noticed the subtle changes in Cal since the fall. It had been the talk in every home over the past few weeks. Primarily, because it was the closest that their team had come to losing one of their own in almost twenty years.

“No, no, nothing specific.” She shuddered nervously and Dina and Marty exchanged another glance.

“I was just saying, if there was some—oh, never mind!” Andrea slammed her head back against the leather chair and let out a large frustrated breath.

Marty studied her troubled face. She’d met Andrea the previous year when she’d been brought in for smoke inhalation and placed on Andrea’s ward. She’d liked the nurse right off and as they became friends, Marty soon discovered Andrea was not only kind and fun to be with, she was a lousy liar. In Marty’s estimation, those were all the traits of a good friend.

“By the way, I forgot to mention this earlier,” Dina started in an attempt to change the subject. “Did you ladies know that Dwight is supposedly planning a surprise bachelor party for Cal?”

Marty quirked an eyebrow. “So what?”

Dina’s eyes widened in amazement. “So what? Do you know what they do at those parties? Bring in a bunch of booty-shaking hoochies and get all liquored up!”

Marty settled back in her chair. “Come on, Dina, lighten up. It’s just the last hurrah before he gives up the bachelor life forever. Cut the guys some slack.” She glanced at Andrea. “Unless, you have a problem with it?”

Andrea, who’d been lost in thought, realized they were both staring at her. “What? Oh, doesn’t make me any difference,” she said with the shrug of her shoulders.

“Fine, suit yourself.” Dina twisted her mouth, realizing she would get no support for her moral outrage. “I’m just glad Dwight didn’t feel the need for such low, debasing entertainment.”

Marty snickered. “At least, none that he let you know about.”

“What are you saying—Dwight had a bachelor party without my knowledge?”

Before Marty could respond, an energetic man bounced into the room. “Hello, ladies!”

Andrea smiled in greeting, remembering the first time she’d seen Zack Aquinas, one of the most sought-after men in Detroit. Spa Day had originally been Dina’s idea, and from the way she had described the masseur, Andrea had expected him to look like something off the cover of a romance novel: tall, lean and beyond-belief gorgeous, when in truth he was a small, round man with a cherubic face. Not physically unpleasant, but certainly nothing worth throwing your panties at.

Andrea had almost laughed out loud at the comical image, until she stretched out on his table and experienced the magic for herself. The man’s hand were like living silk, and as if guided by some inner knowledge he had worked her taut shoulders and lower back until she felt like a ball of pliable rubber. After that first session, Andrea slept better than she had in years. It only took one more session to turn her into a Zack groupie.

As they followed him to the tables, Andrea found that she was relieved that Zack had arrived when he did. She was starting to regret consulting her opinionated friends; with their conflicting opinions, they’d only left her more confused than she already was. Not that any of it mattered anyway. In the end the decision would have to be hers.

Across town at the firehouse, Cal was finishing up his daily sixty-minute workout by adding another twenty-pound weight to each end of the pole and securing it in place with the locks. He glanced back at the doorway beside one of the gym equipment cabinets.

“Something on your mind, Jeff?” he asked, before shaking the light sprinkling of dust from his hands and positioning himself on the bench to lift the one hundred and fifty pounds over his chest.

Jeff Collins froze in his hiding place behind the large metal cabinet. He glanced at the opposite wall, noticing for the first time the large mirror that revealed his presence. He’d assumed Cal was too involved in his workout routine to notice anything.

Assuming what he hoped was a casual posture, he stepped out into the open. “No, not really.”

Cal shrugged and lifted the bar. Pushing up with fairly little exertion, he completed ten repetitions before replacing the bar. Cal glanced at his friend. “Hey, man, I know that the promotion thing—I mean, I don’t want there to be any hard feelings.”

Jeff stood over the bench. “No hard feelings.”

Cal glanced at him. Something in Jeff’s voice said otherwise.

“I’m just here to do a job.”

Cal sat up, and grabbing a towel off a nearby bench, he wiped his face. “Glad to hear that.” Cal still felt the need to give a warning. He slung the towel around his neck and stood. “After all, a firehouse is no place for a hot dog.”

“What are you trying to say to me, Cal?”

Cal shrugged. “Nothing a veteran like you doesn’t already know.” With that statement, he turned and walked out of the gym.

Jeff’s head swung around and his eyes followed Cal until he disappeared around the corner. Only then did he allow his face to relax. The ugly sneer that seemed to be a part of his permanent expression reappeared, along with the cool, dead look in his hard, dark eyes.

Cal walked along the hall toward his office, mentally replaying the conversation. There was something not quite right about Jeff Collins since he’d been promoted. It was obvious the man was feeling the sting of being overlooked for a promotion he thought was guaranteed.

It made no sense, considering Cal was the one to recommend him for the promotion. But ultimately, the decision had been in the hands of the council and they had chosen Cal. But there was something in Jeff’s eyes…the intense hatred he’d seen in the man’s eyes seemed excessive for such a minor offense. Maybe the guy had mental problems that were not listed in his departmental record.

Cal rubbed his chin thoughtfully—wouldn’t be the first time an unstable person had gotten by the shrink at the academy. But with something like that only time could tell. For now, Cal thought, he would just keep an eye on Jeff, just in case.

He was almost back to his office when he was approached by Noel, their district chief fire marshal. “Hey, Cal, got a minute?”

Cal opened the door and motioned his friend inside. “Sure, what’ cha need?”

Noel handed him a folder. “Need you to sign off on the Hadley building.”

As the fire team responding to the call, Cal was obligated to verify the information in the report for any potential lawsuits. “Did anything seem strange about that fire?” Cal asked Noel as he scribbled his name across the forms, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

“Do you mean about the fire or finding the kid inside?”

Cal frowned. “When I think about it, finding Marco there should not have been that much of a surprise. I’ve been aware for some time that kids like to hang out in there. Everyone from the little bitty ones to the teens seems to be able to find a use for that building. But, no, I was asking about the cause of the fire itself.”

“Completely accidental.” He motioned to the folder. “Read for yourself.”

“Yeah, I did. Just was wondering if there was anything outside of the report.”

Noel tilted his head to study his friend. “What’s this all about, Cal?”

Cal quickly shook his head trying to deflect his friend’s suspicions. He was hoping he would feel the man out subtly, but Noel was no fool. “Nothing, just wondering. Here you go.” He smiled and handed back the folder.

“Sure?”

Cal stood and patted him on the back. “You know how I am, man.”

Noel smiled. “I forgot how anal you get about stuff. But don’t worry, this was classic by-the-book accidental burning. It seemed to be started by some kind of small explosive, like a firecracker. Probably kids, but since I can’t prove it there is nothing that can be done about it.”

Cal saw his friend out before returning to the work on his desk, but unable to concentrate he soon found himself standing at the window looking out over the busy avenue below.

When the dizziness and nightmares had started Cal had brushed them off as being the aftereffects of the fire. But now, several weeks later, he was still experiencing all the same symptoms, but with even more frequency.

He’d hoped there would be some explanation for all of it when he saw Noel’s write-ups, but he’d known almost the instant he looked at it that it was just a standard investigation report.

No insidious chemicals were used, no mind-altering drugs were released in the atmosphere. And Cal was forced to accept that whatever was going on with him…was just him.

Chapter 5

Two hours after her massage, Andrea pulled into her parents’ driveway. She could feel the effects of Zack’s hard work beginning to wear off. The tension was already returning to her neck and shoulders.

She glanced at her watch to check the time, and nodded in satisfaction. Her father would not be home from work for another two hours. She planned to be long gone before then.

She grabbed the bag from the local pharmacy off the passenger seat, hopped out of her little Mercury Mariner and headed for the side door. She walked along the red brick path that led a windy trail through the beautifully manicured garden.

She looked over the fence that ran the length of the house at the neatly cut lawn and tried to ignore the empty doghouse that sat against the back gate. Her eyes flashed to it anyway. No dog had lived in it for almost twelve years, but Andrea knew her father left it there as a reminder to her, a silent warning not to interfere in his business.

When Andrea was preparing to leave home for college, she found her days and nights plagued with concern for her mother. Not that her presence in the house had ever hindered Andrew Chenault in any way, but she felt that she’d always served as some kind of buffer.

She kept having daydreams of coming home for a holiday break and discovering her mother’s lifeless body. A month before she was to leave for school, an idea came to her, and the fact that it was right before Mother’s Day made it perfect. Andrea had asked her father if it would be all right to give her mother a dog for Mother’s Day.

The fact that they both knew what an animal lover her mother was, her father had agreed. Andrea knew her father expected her to bring home a five-pound purse dog that would bounce and yelp and do little else. She would never forget the way his eyes narrowed on her face when she came through the door with a fully grown, two-hundred-pound female rottweiler.

Even though she had not openly defied him—after all, there had been no agreement on what type of dog she would buy—she knew he felt deceived. As far as Andrea could remember, that was the day he let down the pretense he’d maintained throughout her youth of being a loving father and husband. After that, they became unspoken adversaries.

Of course, the dog had taken to her gentle-natured mother right off, just as Andrea knew she would. Her mother had laughingly named her Buttercup. Andrea had few memories of her mother ever being happier than the day she received her. The dog followed Margaret everywhere, and although she never growled at him, Buttercup watched Andrew with an instinctive wariness.

That last month before she left for school, Andrea believed their home was the most at peace it had ever been and she left with a clear conscience. However, less than two weeks later, her distraught mother called her dormitory, and through the tears and slurred speech conveyed the tale that Buttercup had run away. Andrea never knew if the slurred speech was due to alcohol or a busted lip.

When she came home for the holidays five months later, the doghouse was still sitting against the fence in the backyard.

Andrea confronted her father as to why he hadn’t gotten rid of the painful reminder. He’d smiled and said, “Who knows, maybe one day Buttercup will come home.”

Despite all the things she’d seen her father do over the course of a lifetime, it wasn’t until that moment that she’d begun to hate him.

She knocked lightly on the side door to get her mother’s attention. Margaret, standing at the sink, looked up at the noise and smiled. She quickly wiped her hands on her apron and opened the screen door.

“Hi, sweetheart.” She swung the door open and stepped back out of the way. Andrea entered and hugged her mother. She handed off the bag, and began with her usual statement. “I can’t stay long.”

“I know,” Margaret muttered, “but hopefully long enough to share a cup of coffee.”

Andrea smiled. “Sure, why not?” She glanced at the table and saw brochures spread out and neatly arranged. “What’s this?”

Margaret smiled with a genuine twinkle in her brown eyes. “Your father’s taking me on vacation for our anniversary. He told me to pick any place in the world I want to go.” She gestured to the pamphlets. “There are so many wonderful places, I can’t decide.”

Andrea smiled and took an empty seat. Payoff time, she thought. Trying to wrap her mind around something she’d accepted years ago.

Her mother at fifty-two was still an incredibly beautiful woman, and always had been. She’d married her college sweetheart thirty years ago, and after two miscarriages, gave birth to their one and only surviving child, a healthy baby girl.

Andrew Chenault had been born into a savings and loan conglomerate, and at the tender age of twenty-five, he’d been given the reins of his family’s largest mortgage firm which he’d doubled in size over the past twenty years.

On paper, her parents had the ideal marriage. A beautiful home in an affluent neighborhood; Margaret was active in several different charitable causes, and Andrew was a doting husband in public. They took several vacations a year and their friends envied them.

But then again, Andrea thought, their friends did not live in the house with them. So many times, Andrea had tried to convince her mother to leave her father, but all she ever succeeded in doing was driving a wedge between herself and her mother.

So she stopped trying, and now they both pretended like theirs was a normal family. After being an E.R. nurse for ten years, Andrea had come to realize that in many respects they were a normal family. And crazy as it seemed, despite the occasional late-night trip to the emergency room, her mother seemed satisfied with her life.

“How about a cruise to the Bahamas?” Andrea asked, trying to be supportive.

Margaret laughed. “You do realize it’s hurricane season.” She shook her head. “No, I was thinking something more exotic.” She held up a leaflet with a picture of an ancient ruin on the cover, grinning with all the enthusiasm of a small child, and Andrea found herself unable to help smiling in return.

She took the brochure and read. “A Mayan village in South America?”

“Just think, a civilization older than most of the world, and parts of it are still standing.”

Andrea put down the pamphlet. “Whatever makes you happy.”

Margaret sat at the table and her eyes flashed slyly over Andrea’s face. “Speaking of what makes us happy, would you care to explain why Cal was answering your phone at two o’clock in the morning?”

Andrea quirked her mouth. “Are you looking for a reason other than the obvious?”

“Andrea, I’m surprised at you. I would’ve thought you’d save yourself for your wedding night.”

Andrea’s eyes widened at the genuine shock in her mother’s voice. You have got to be kidding me. “Uh, yeah, well, we decided we didn’t want to buy the car without giving it a little test drive.”

Margaret’s mouth fell open and Andrea couldn’t help laughing. It seems she’d offended her mother’s delicate senses. “Just how many men have…test driven you?”

“Mom! I’m not going to answer that! Geez, what a question!”

“I raised you to be a lady.”

“I am a lady!” A sexually satisfied lady. “Can we talk about something else?” Andrea could feel herself beginning to blush. She shook her head—thirty-four and still unable to discuss sex with her mother.

Margaret pursed her lips thoughtfully, and Andrea knew she wanted to continue the interrogation, but instead she hopped up from the table and went to prepare two cups of coffee. “Two sugars and three creams, right?” she called over her shoulder, and Andrea confirmed it.

“Andrea…” Margaret began hesitantly, still facing the coffeepot. “Do you feel…safe with Cal?”

Andrea had been looking through the brochures, but her head came up. “Yes, very safe.”

“Are you sure?”

Andrea studied her mother’s ramrod straight back and realized that in her entire life, she could not ever remember seeing her mother slouch. “Yes, Mom, I feel safe and protected with Cal.”

Andrea had never told her mother about her concerns regarding Cal’s line of work. Andrea loved her mother, but there was something in knowing that her mother wanted to stay with her father, despite what he did to her, that made it impossible to completely trust her.

Margaret nodded vigorously. “Good, good. It’s important to feel safe.”

And what about you, Mom? Who’s going to make you feel safe? In past conversations, this was where Andrea would’ve questioned her mother regarding her reasons for staying. This was where she would’ve begged and pleaded with her to leave. She’d stopped doing that a long time ago.

No more was said about feeling safe. And although Margaret tried to steer the conversation back that way more than once, Andrea kept the line of conversation away from her sex life. The ladies spent the next hour looking through brochures and laughing at the possibilities of visiting each locale.

She was so enjoying herself, Andrea lost track of the time and did not realize how late it was until she heard the sound of her father’s Cadillac pulling into the driveway.

She froze in place and gently set the brochure for Bora Bora back on the table. “I’d really better be going.” She stood and quickly placed her coffee cup in the sink, then checked the table to make sure she had put nothing else out of place and watched as her mother did the same. Her heart sank. A lifetime of conditioning, she thought.

She kissed her mother’s cheek, but before she could slip out the side door, her father appeared in the entryway to the kitchen.

He smiled, seeming genuinely pleased to see his daughter. “Well, if it isn’t the prodigal daughter.” He held his arms opened for a hug, and Andrea resisted, but in the end she went into them, knowing somewhere in the back of her brain, the little girl in her was still looking for the daddy who would push her swing all the way to the top. The daddy who would bring home gifts from every business trip. The daddy who gave the very best belly tickles. Some part of her would always remember him that way.

She hugged him briefly. “Hi, Daddy.”

Andrew Chenault took in the kitchen with one sweeping glance, and seemed satisfied with what he found. He glanced at the brochures neatly stacked on the table. “Your mother tell you about our vacation?”

Andrea nodded.

“You know you’re welcome to come along.”

Andrea forced a smile. “No, thanks, with the wedding less than four months away, I’ve got a lot of work to do.” Andrea knew she could’ve given a million excuses for not wanting to travel with them, but she always, always chose the one that involved Cal.

Shameful as it was, she knew she used her fiancé like a battle shield. The two men, Cal and her father, had only met once, and had almost come to blows. Andrea knew her father was intimidated by a man that towered over him. Some dark part of her reveled in it.

“I’ve got to be going.”

“Sure you can’t stay for dinner? I’ve missed you.” Andrew tilted his head to look at her where she was still cradled in his arm.

Andrea glanced at his face and was surprised to see sincerity in his eyes. “No, I’ve got to get going.” She broke free of his loose hold, hugged her mother, and headed out the back door.

She hurried down the path, hopped in her car and pulled out of the driveway as quickly as possible. Andrea quickly let down her car windows and took in a big gulp of fresh air as the suffocating feeling began to subside.

She picked up her cell phone, and pressed the speed dial button for Cal.

“Hey, baby,” Cal answered on the first ring.

“How much longer?” she asked, knowing that he was ending a rotation this evening. She was anxious to see him.

“Not long, just finishing up some paperwork.”

“What did you want to do tonight?” she asked, hoping he would not say crash at her place. Andrea was feeling the need to get out and do something.

As if sensing the need, he asked, “How do you feel about carnivals?”

“Carnivals?”

“Yeah, there is one down the street from the firehouse. Wanna go? Maybe I can win you one of those giant pink elephants.”

“Ooohh, a giant pink elephant,” Andrea purred. “You spoil me.”

“I know. Wanna go?”

“Sure, why not?” she said, while trying to stifle a yawn.

“See, that’s what I love about you, your enthusiasm.”

A few minutes later, when Andrea hung up the phone she was still smiling. In a matter of minutes, Cal had managed to lift the dark cloud that always followed her away from her childhood home.

Sometimes, Andrea felt as if she were a prisoner who’d been forced to spend an eternity in the darkness, never knowing what it felt like to have the sun on her face. Until Cal came into her life throwing open the shutters, and guiding her into the light of love and laughter. Despite whatever doubts she had about their relationship, Andrea knew that life with Cal meant never having to live in the darkness again.

Chapter 6

“Step right up, folks and try your luck!” The heckler moved back and forth across the grassy area before his exhibit, trying desperately to coerce patrons. It was already past 8:00 p.m. and he’d only had about thirty percent of his typical turnout. The light drizzle of rain that had been falling all day kept a large number of carnival attendees away and in a few very short hours he would have to pack up for the night.

Just then, his eyes fell on the large man and petite woman moving in his direction. He saw his opportunity. So desperate for this score, he stepped outside of his safety zone to cross into the man’s path. “How about you, sir? You look like a veritable Hercules. Surely, a mammoth of a man such as yourself can quickly win a prize for your lady.”

Cal looked down into the greedy little face of the man who’d practically jumped into his path, and then looked at Andrea, who was presently cradling the four stuffed animals he’d won for her already. “No, thanks.” He went to step around the man.

The man gasped in false alarm. “Afraid of a challenge, my good man?” The heckler turned to the crowd of people beginning to gather. “What do you say, folks? Do you think our little exhibit can present a challenge to this friendly giant?”

Cal looked around at the curious faces, and felt his jaw flex. The little man was becoming a nuisance, not to mention drawing unwanted attention. He could’ve easily swatted him out of his way and kept walking. But now, Andrea was looking up at him with that pleading expression that always got to him.

“What?”

Her eyes twinkled as she gingerly pointed to something on the wall of the booth.

Cal’s eyes followed her finger. “Aww, hell,” Cal sighed in defeat when his eyes fell on the big, pink elephant tacked against the back booth wall.

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