Table of Contents

Cover Page

Excerpt

About the Author

Title Page

Epigraph

Dedication

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Dear Reader

Copyright

“You’re the last person I expected to see at the door…”

Megan stared at him, dazed. “What are you doing here, Mitch?”

“I came to town on business. I thought I’d come by and see the kids…and you,” he added.

His dark brown hair was tousled as usual and a bit of gray showed around the edges. He was looking very fit and handsome. She gave up the pretense. She felt unhinged, and it showed.

“Maybe it would be better if you just left,” she said crisply.

“I just wanted to see all of you. I didn’t come to cause any trouble, Megan.”

Finally her eyes met his. He was intently watching her. In his eyes she saw a sadness that had never been there before.

“I couldn’t stay away any longer. It was time to come back,” he said softly.

MARTHA MASON

has spent the major portion of her adult life being a stay-at-home mom. Now that her children are grown, she has time to pursue things she has never done before—like writing. “I prayed, asking God what I could do with my time, and unexpectedly I was led to writing. This surprised me, because I never had any aptitude for writing. Composing a note to go on the refrigerator was a major task.”

Martha is delighted with writing Christian fiction. Knowing life isn’t always perfect, but that things always turn out right if she puts her trust in God. She feels this career change was “inspired.” Two Rings, One Heart is her first novel. She plans to keep writing, enjoying the new direction her life is taking.

Smith Mountain Lake is where she resides with her husband, Boonie, and her mother-in-law, Beverly. She has three children—Chris, Amy and Andy. With the lake in her backyard, there is always plenty of company. She is also looking forward to the construction of the church she attends. She says the Lord, her family and friends gave her the encouragement she needed to write this book.

Two Rings, One Heart
Martha Mason

www.millsandboon.co.uk

And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

—Ephesians 4:32

To “Boonie,” Chris, Amy, Andy, Beverly and all my family and friends who believed in me and encouraged me in untold ways. I love you all.

Chapter One

Memories. Old memories, always flooding up from the past Megan Whitney had built a new life, but the past was always coming to haunt her. Reminders of a life years ago and the husband she had loved and trusted.

Why couldn’t she just let it go? Maybe it was because of the kids. But they were a blessing. No, it was deeper than that It was the promises. The vows she had made to God and to Mitchell.

Megan realized she felt this way every time she had a confrontation challenging her moral values. This time not only had her integrity been questioned, but by the end of the encounter she was being accused of causing her husband’s departure. Was it true? Had she been the problem all along?

The day had started out as usual for Megan. She got her two children off to school. Afterwards she opened Meadow Flowers, a once-small florist’s shop that she had built into a flourishing nursery and landscape business.

In the morning, she made flower arrangements. After lunch, she delivered them and went to do a final inspection on a landscaping job. From there she went to the high school to pick up her sixteen-year-old son, Zack.

Zack drove his mother to the Division of Motor Vehicles. He was finally old enough to get his driver’s license. Coming out of the building, he proudly showed his mother the license. To him it meant freedom to come and go without his mother escorting him. “See Mom, it’s official. I can drive now. Aren’t you happy?”

“Overjoyed! Now you can do the evening deliveries.”

“Aw, Mom!” Zack groaned. “Can I have the truck after that?”

“We’ll see,” she said, smiling faintly.

The last stop was a meeting to complete a landscape proposal. Megan’s day had been hectic, but she didn’t complain. There had been lean years in the past, when it had been hard to make ends meet.

Faith in God was her foundation. She had learned to pray, work hard and hold on. Now she no longer had to scrape to make a living. God was faithful.

Zack parked the company van like a pro in front of the newly completed building. Megan grabbed the proposal. “I know you’re anxious to try out that new driver’s license, but try to wait for me.”

Zack grinned wickedly at his mother as he changed the radio station. “Don’t be too long or I’ll just have to leave you here!”

Inside the building Megan found the owner, Mr. Carlyle, and waited for him to finish a phone conversation. He was a nice-looking man in his mid-fifties. She knew he owned several large properties in the area and was quite wealthy.

Mr. Carlyle glanced over the proposal, wrote a deposit check and handed it to her. They had met on a previous occasion at the work site. She had been in coveralls and had had her hair up in a cap, he recalled.

“Thank you. We’ll start work on Monday,” she said, then turned to leave.

Mr. Carlyle followed her outside. “Why don’t you explain the layout to me one more time?” he said, halting her progress.

Megan pointed out where the trees, shrubs and grass would be planted. “It will be beautiful. I guarantee you’ll be satisfied. We also offer lawn care, snow removal and seasonal flower planting. If you’re interested, give us a call,” she said, handing him her business brochure.

“Ms. Whitney, I think it would be nice if we closed this deal by going out to dinner. To celebrate,” he suggested.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Carlyle, I can’t. My son is waiting for me,” she said politely.

He glanced at the van. “He’s a big boy. Drop him at home, change into something nice, and meet me later.”

“I also have a little daughter waiting for me to come home and spend some time with her,” she said, trying to gently refuse his offer.

“It might be fun,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

“Mr. Carlyle, I’m married,” she said, glancing at his left hand, seeing that he was wearing a wedding ring.

“So am I. What difference does that make? We’re just going out to have a little fun, not make a lifetime commitment,” he said laughing.

Megan didn’t like the way this conversation was going and she intended to close it. “My crew will start working on Monday, if that suits you?”

As he stared at her without answering, she realized that he was waiting for her to back away or show some sign of submission. When she didn’t, he verbally attacked her.

“The way I hear it, your husband hasn’t been around for years. And when he was, he was a no-good drunk! Why are you being faithful to him?”

Megan twirled her engagement ring around her finger—something she always did when she was unsettled. Mr. Carlyle was a prominent businessman. He could do her a lot of good, or a lot of harm. Lord, help me to gracefully extract myself from this situation. Don’t let him push it too far.

“I hear you’re an exceptional businesswoman, Ms. Whitney, or may I call you Megan? How are you at negotiations?” he asked, letting her know he was implying more than business.

Megan thought before she spoke. “I have a thriving business.”

“Why don’t you go out to dinner with me? Maybe we can negotiate another deal,” he said suggestively. “You must be lonely and need a little companionship.”

“Mr. Carlyle, I’m not sure what you’re suggesting, but I have a pretty good idea. I have two children and I believe I need to set an example for them. To go out with you would be inappropriate, since I’m married,” she stated.

“Ms. Whitney, there are ways around such concerns. I’m sure your children would understand you going out for a business dinner,” he said persuasively.

“Is that all it would be?” Megan asked boldly.

“It can be whatever you want it to be.” He grinned smugly. “No one will ever know, but us.”

Megan held out the check to him. “Maybe you’d better take this back.”

“What’s the problem?” He seemed baffled. “We go out and have a little fun. I give you a few good customers. Nobody gets hurt and we all get what we want”

“Doesn’t it bother you to break the promises you made to your wife before God?” she asked and waited for him to answer. She honestly wanted to know.

“All that happened a long time ago. We’ve both changed. And who knows if God is even there or cares?” he said carelessly.

“So you’re telling me that the vows you made to your wife and God no longer matter. You’re free to do whatever you wish. Who changed the rules?” she asked.

He glared at her angrily.

“You know, if you keep this up, one of these days you’re going to go home and she’s not going to be there. Maybe you should take your wife out to dinner. She may not wait forever,” Megan said evenly.

“I don’t want to hear this. Especially not from you,” he said hotly. “Who are you to preach to me, anyway? You probably ran the poor guy off, after you drove him to drink!”

Megan steadied herself after the assault of cruel words. Then she offered him the deposit check once again.

“No! Keep it. If you’re that straight, I know you’ll do the job right. Business, you understand,” he said sarcastically.

Megan strode to the van quickly, before some of the harsh words that were reeling through her head could come spewing out. “Let’s go home,” she said quietly. Zack started the van. He had watched enough to guess what had transpired. He drove away giving the guy a dirty look.

When they got back to the flower shop, Megan immediately began working. Ted Garrett, her assistant, looked at Zack concerned. He knew Megan always asked how things had been while she was out, or at least said “hi.”

“Mr. Carlyle wanted a date,” Zack explained, irritated.

“Oh! Did we lose the job?” he asked cheerfully, having worked with Mr. Carlyle types before.

“No! But I nearly lost my cool,” Megan said, turning crimson at the thought of the encounter. “He thought I was going to sleep with him!”

“You should have slugged him and told him to keep the job,” Ted said, chuckling. “We have enough business without him.”

“Don’t think that idea didn’t cross my mind,” she admitted. “We don’t get big jobs like that very often. We can’t afford to just throw them away. Besides, I know you’re looking forward to digging those holes for the trees he ordered,” she teased.

By the time they locked the shop, Megan was her usual self again. Zack playfully draped his arm around his mother’s shoulder as they walked across the yard to the old farmhouse. “I’m proud of you, Mom. You were something else.”

“I’m proud of you, too. I suppose you’ll be wanting to take the truck out,” she said, pulling out a shiny new set of keys and dangling them before him.

Zack grinned. “How’d you guess?”

“Mothers just know these things,” she said, tossing him the keys.

Zack hugged her neck, then dashed inside ahead of her.

“Cool!” said Jess, looking at the picture on her brother’s license. “When are you going to take me out?”

When he didn’t answer, she turned to her mother. “Gran wants to know if she can pick me up after school tomorrow. We’re going shopping and to a movie. Can I spend the night with her?” Jess clamored.

Megan smiled at her daughter’s pretty face. To a ten-year-old girl, a trip to the mall with an overindulgent grandmother was heaven. “I guess so.”

Zack showed his grandmother his license. She squinted at the picture and smiled at him with approval. “Good job!”

“Thanks for coming over, Ruth,” Megan said to her mother-in-law, comforted that Jess hadn’t had to stay alone.

Ruth Whitney was in her sixties and retired. She seemed to be at loose ends most of the time. Her husband had died years before. Then Mitchell, her only child, had deserted her as well as his wife and children. Life had been far from perfect for her, but she didn’t dwell on that. Megan always included her in all the family activities.

“Mom, my camping trip is tomorrow too!” Zack said anxiously, realizing this would be the first time both he and his sister would be gone overnight at the same time. “I could cancel,” he offered, obviously trying not to sound disappointed.

“No way! You guys have been planning this trip for weeks. You’re going,” she said stubbornly.

Zack knew that was the end of the discussion. His mother had made up her mind. He was a little relieved. He really didn’t want to give up the camping trip. Then again he felt a little guilty leaving her alone.

Megan helped Zack load his gear into his friend’s father’s Jeep the next evening. It was a guys’ weekend. Zack didn’t get much of that being surrounded by women. “Have a good time!” Megan said, waving as she watched them drive away.

Zack was doing really well for a kid growing up without a father. She tried her best, but sometimes it wasn’t enough. There were some things a mother just couldn’t do.

With the kids out of the house, it was unusually quiet. Megan found herself at loose ends staring out the window. The farm was mostly gently rolling land, but at the back of the property were foothills into the nearby Blue Ridge Mountains.

She put on some old clothes and started walking down the dirt road that led to the river. She crossed the old wooden footbridge and started climbing the timeworn, rutted-out path. Out of breath when she reached the top, she turned to look back.

The view always made her heart swell, and at the same time humbled her. Below, like a picture, lay her farm. The farmhouse, barns and buildings that made up Meadow Flowers paved their way along the dirt road ending near the river. Each improvement looked as though it belonged, not as though it were an after-thought. Megan had planned it that way from this very spot. It was her favorite place. The kids called it “The Hill.”

Megan moved on to an ancient-looking rock and climbed onto it, thinking back to the circumstances that had brought her to this point in her life. The summer she was sixteen, Mrs. Thurlow opened a small flower shop to keep herself busy while her husband farmed. The shop was just a hobby but Mr. Thurlow hired Megan to keep his wife from overworking herself. Megan had just wanted to make a little spending money.

At first the shop had very few customers. Once in a while a friend of Mrs. Thurlow would stop by for fresh flowers to put on the table for dinner guests. Other than that, Megan spent her time pulling weeds, pruning shrubs or helping can vegetables.

Even though she was learning a lot about gardens and plants, she was bored stiff. With her quick mind and lots of time to think, she began coming up with ways to improve business. There was always an excess of fresh vegetables. With the Thurlows’ permission, she put a sign near the road advertising homegrown vegetables for sale.

Before long they had a number of regular customers and began getting orders for flowers to be delivered. Mrs. Thurlow had never learned to drive, but Megan had an old car. The two of them would arrange flowers, then set out to deliver them, carrying along a variety of vegetables just in case they could sell some along the way. Usually, they sold everything.

Mrs. Thurlow loved it. She would get to visit her friends, and make a few dollars to boot. Megan also loved it. She was no longer pulling weeds or canning vegetables.

When Megan graduated from high school, Mrs. Thurlow wanted her to work full time and offered her a percentage of what they made. Megan was planning to marry her high-school sweetheart, and needed the job.

By this time, Mrs. Thurlow just wanted to keep her around. Megan made her feel years younger, the older woman had told her. The delivery trips were like an adventure. Megan always seemed to think up something to keep things interesting. They would stop for ice cream or go by the pond with stale bread and feed the ducks, or ride up to the highest hill just for the view.

Megan had a way with Mr. Thurlow as well. She would bring him a box of jelly doughnuts or pick up the latest trade paper for him. It was his suggestion to give Megan a percentage. He knew she would earn it.

Years later, the Thurlows made the difficult decision to retire and move out west with one of their sons. He had a ranch, and told his dad that he needed help with the chores. They all knew it was because of the health problems that Mr. Thurlow was experiencing. Yet it was the best decision for the couple.

It was bad news for Megan. The young girl that the Thurlows had hired for a summer job was now the mother of two small children and raising them as a single parent. She had no training or experience outside the flower shop. The thought of trying to find a job to support her family was frightening.

The Thurlows were well aware of her situation. They offered to sell her the farm, knowing she loved Meadow Flowers and dreamed of owning it one day. Megan went to her bank and tried to secure a loan. The only collateral she had was her old car and the bedroom furniture Mitchell had given her for their first wedding anniversary. The bank had no interest in either, and turned her down flat. She went to several more banks and loan companies, receiving the same response at each.

With no place else to go, Megan finally turned to God. Dear God, I don’t know what to do. I know, with Your help, I can run this business and pay back the money I borrow. If there’s any way possible for me to buy this land and if it’s Your will, please show me the way. In Jesus’ name, amen.

When she got the last negative loan report, she figured it just wasn’t meant to be. She braced herself to tell the Thurlows. Parking near the kitchen door of the farmhouse, she knocked on the door.

Mrs. Thurlow answered, smiling. “Megan, this is a surprise!”

“Could I talk to both of you?” she asked seriously.

“Of course, come in,” Mrs. Thurlow said, leading her into the family room. “Please sit down.”

Mr. Thurlow was reading the paper. Megan nervously waited until she had their full attention. “What can we do for you?” Mr. Thurlow asked, putting the paper down.

Megan sighed. “I just came over to let you know I can’t get a loan.”

“We were afraid of that,” Mrs. Thurlow said sympathetically.

“I wanted to let you know as soon as possible,” Megan said, getting up to leave.

“Sit down! We’ve just been discussing a notion. See what you think of it,” Mr. Thurlow said, motioning for her to sit down.

The Thurlows had so many exciting plans. She was really pleased for them, but she wasn’t sure she could hear about their unfolding adventure today without crying. Yet out of love and respect for the pair, she put on a happy face and sat back down.

Mrs. Thurlow spoke up first. “You know I’ve spent all of my life here. Our children have lives of their own. They don’t plan to come back here. We hate the thought of developers dividing up the land into housing tracts, but it’s a small farm and no one else really wants it.”

Except me! thought Megan.

“You know we have a developer that wants to buy it, don’t you?” Mrs. Thurlow asked, then she continued

on before Megan could respond. “He wants to cut it up—”

Megan could see Mr. Thurlow was getting impatient with his wife’s lengthy story. “What would you think if we loaned you the money?” he blurted out.

Megan’s mouth fell open. “I don’t understand.”

“Well, we would act like the bank. Sell you the place at a decent interest rate. You would make the payments to us. If you can’t make a go of it, the farm would come back to us. We’ll get a lawyer and do it all legal and business-like,” he said, brushing it off and making it sound unimportant. “But we won’t need a down payment or any of that stuff. What d’ya think?” Both of the Thurlows were smiling proudly at their idea.

Megan looked from one to the other. She wasn’t sure how to take this new turn of events. She didn’t want to put Mr. and Mrs. Thurlow in any kind of financial jeopardy. “Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?” she asked, feeling overwhelmed.

“Positive! We checked with a lawyer. He said people do this all the time,” Mr. Thurlow said, grinning smugly.

“If this isn’t the answer to prayers, I don’t know what is,” Megan said, smiling bravely. Then she broke down and bawled.

“We know you’ll love this place as we have. This is the right thing for you and for us,” said Mrs. Thurlow, as Megan wiped her eyes.

Mr. Thurlow stuck out his hand to Megan. “Is it a deal?”

“You better believe it,” she replied, grabbing his hand and shaking it heartily.

This was one of Megan’s best memories. She thanked God every single day for being so good to her. Her little family thrived on the farm. Meeting the mortgage had been tight in the beginning, but she had found creative ways to meet her payments.

One year, she made pine wreaths and sold them to make the December payment. The next year she put in a pick-your-own pumpkin patch. She always had just enough to pay the bills and give to the Lord.

Megan knew these “patch jobs” weren’t going to work forever. She started reading everything she could get her hands on about growing plants. Before long she built a small greenhouse and started her own bedding plants for the coming spring. She planted Christmas trees as part of a long-range plan.

She continued to educate herself. Eventually she offered tree service, snow removal, lawn care and landscaping, along with her florist’s service. She even planted bedding flowers in the spring for those who wanted a pretty yard with no bother. She especially enjoyed doing this for older people who really weren’t up to digging.

When the time came to hire someone, she prayed, asking God to help her find the right person for the job. Soon she ran into an old high-school friend, Ted Garrett. He was out of work and desperate. He had been a business manager and the store had gone out of business. He had a wife and three little kids.

Ted happened to see Megan at the local building supply store, while picking up a washer for a leaky faucet. “Hi, Megan. How are you doing?” he asked.

“I don’t have enough time to do all the jobs that need doing. I’m getting ready to build a retaining wall,” she answered distractedly.

“Need help?” he offered.

“I sure do, but everyone’s looking for a suit job. They want an office and easy work,” she said, thinking he was just making conversation.

That statement hit Ted where he lived. Not knowing he was out of work, she continued on, “I need someone who’s willing to put in a hard day’s work.”

“About what would the job pay?” Ted asked curiously.

“If someone did a good job, more than they would make in an office. For a real hustler, I would be willing to work out a salary-plus-commission job,” she said, trying to figure out why he was asking her all these questions.

“What does the job entail?” he asked.

“Being able to keep up with me,” she said kidding.

“I can do that,” he said cockily. “Consider me.”

Megan was surprised. “Why? Are you tired of the retail scene? Or do you want to see what the other half does?” she teased.

Ted looked embarrassed. “No. I lost my job months ago. I haven’t been able to find steady work since. All I’ve looked for is white-collar work, but I need a job and I need it now,” he said seriously.

Megan looked away, thinking. Lord, is this the employee I’ve been praying for? Show me! She turned back to Ted. “If you’re serious, be at Meadow Flowers tomorrow morning at eight o’clock sharp,” she said briskly, and left.

Ted showed up before she got to work the next morning. It had been a hard day, she recalled. She nearly worked him into the ground. He had been working for her ever since. She kept her word; when business grew, so did his paycheck. Ted had definitely been the employee she’d prayed for.

Now Megan had two more full-time employees, and Zack worked part time. Looking back, overall, life had been pretty good. She had few complaints. Though she could use a little more free time…and do without people like Mr. Carlyle.

It always did Megan good to remember her humble beginnings. Her life was in God’s hands. She needed to please Him. That was the most important thing.

As the sun began to drop behind the mountains, Megan trekked back down the hill to the farmhouse. It was so empty without the children. She had thought a night by herself might be fun. It wasn’t! She found herself wandering from one room to the next as though looking for someone. Finally she went to bed.

Unable to sleep, other memories came into play. Megan began to hear Mr. Carlyle’s accusing words. “You probably ran him off…ran him off…ran him off…” She looked at the empty place beside her as the words echoed.

She’d gone over this so many times, but she’d never come to a conclusion. Maybe because she’d never heard Mitchell’s side of the story.

She’d been pregnant with Jess. The pregnancy was difficult from the start, kind of like Jess. She had gone to see Doc Crawford for a routine checkup. Her blood pressure had been excessively high. Doc slapped her in the hospital before she had time to argue with him about it.

Once in the hospital, all Megan wanted was to see Mitchell. Ruth had an awful time finding him. He had been fired from his job and hadn’t bothered to tell his family. Ruth finally tracked him down at a local bar and drove him straight to the hospital, hoping he would sober up before Megan saw him.

One look at her bleary-eyed husband made her face things she had been refusing to see. He confessed that he had lost his job, blaming it on everyone but himself. Doc pulled him aside and tried to talk some sense into him. Then Ruth drove him home to let him sober up, while she picked up Zack from school.

Later, Mitchell came back to the hospital. He was still in a self-inflicted alcoholic fog. Megan reached for him. “Mitch, what’s wrong?”

He came closer and gave her his hand. She took it in both of hers and kissed the palm, then pulled him closer. He looked away, unable to face her.

“Mitchell, I love you,” she whispered. She ran her hand through his dirty, tousled hair and down the side of his face, cupping his chin. She waited for their eyes to meet. His were bloodshot and seemed vacant “We can’t go on like this,” she said gently. “You need help. Don’t you understand? I need help, too,” she pleaded, hoping to see some understanding in his eyes.

He shrugged as if it were of little importance. He seemed to want to get away.

His careless attitude caused something in Megan to snap. All the things she had been thinking, but never daring to say, came shooting out “Mitchell, something is going to change. I will not lose this baby worrying about you. It’s time for you to get straight, grow up and accept some responsibility. I need a husband I can depend on. Zack needs a father, not a playmate. When are you going to be there for us, instead of off somewhere with your buddies or lost in a bottle?” Megan began to tear up. “We love you. Why can’t you see that?”

She steadied herself. “I know everything seems awful right now, but it will all work out if we just hold on together and trust God to help us.”

“When are you coming home?” Mitchell had slurred, ignoring her words.

“In a day or two,” said Megan wearily.

“Meg, I never meant for things to get like this,” Mitchell finally admitted.

Tears began to run down Megan’s face. “I know, but they have.”

Mitchell put his head on her chest and let her comfort him. But when Mitchell left, she knew that they hadn’t made any progress.

The next evening Mitchell came to visit again. He was on edge and couldn’t seem to sit still.

“Mitch, I’ve made a decision,” Megan said evenly. “I’m not sharing you anymore. You have to make a choice which you want more—me and Zack, or drinking. You can’t have it both ways. I love you with all my heart, but you’re heading down the wrong road and I’m not going with you. I’ll help you with anything, but things can’t go on the way they are,” she said.

She waited for some kind of response. When she got none, she continued. “If you choose the path you’re on, we’ll have some decisions to make, because one of us is leaving. And know this Mitchell, if you’re ever unfaithful to me, it’s over. I’ll never want to see you again. I want us together as a family. I hope you want that, too.” She had stayed strong until she said this. Then she broke down and cried.

Mitchell carefully took her in his arms and held her. “You know I love you, Meg. There’s never been anyone else, never will be. I love you and Zack. We’ll be okay.”

His words had comforted her for the moment, but the problem had never been other women. It had been alcohol, and nights out with his “ol’ buddies.”

The next day Megan was released from the hospital. Instead of Mitchell picking her up, Doc drove her home. As soon as she came into the apartment, she knew something was wrong. Zack was there with his grandmother and he rushed into her arms.

Megan turned to Ruth for an explanation and her mother-in-law handed her a note.

Dear Meg,

You’re all better off without me. I’m sorry.

I love you,

Mitch

Shattered under the weight of these few words, Megan had collapsed to the floor.

Remembering that day still hurt physically and emotionally. Mitch hadn’t even tried to work things out. He’d just packed up and left town. Megan hadn’t heard from him since.

Occasionally, Mitchell sent his mother money for the children. Otherwise Megan wouldn’t have been sure he was still alive. He never let her know where he was staying or what he was doing. He had cut them all out of his life.

The kids came home after their night away, and life was back to normal.

One afternoon Zack came rushing into the shop after school. “Mom, can I borrow the truck? There’s a young adult conference being held at the civic center in Roanoke tonight. Some of my friends and I thought we’d go.”

“Why is it in Roanoke?” she asked, disturbed by the distance.

“There’s no place here big enough. It’s for all the area high-school students. My teachers recommended that we go. They’re even offering extra credit to the students who attend. The only catch is that we have to write a one-page report on the conference.”

Megan frowned skeptically. She didn’t like the idea of Zack driving late at night.

“Come on, Mom, I know it’s a forty-five minute drive, but I need the extra credit. It’s Friday night, so it won’t matter if I’m a little late, will it?”

“What’s it all about?” his mother asked grudgingly.

“You should like this! They are supposed to help us understand taking responsibility for ourselves as young adults. They’re going to cover a range of subjects like how to handle finances, how to get college aide money, being responsible for moral behavior and substance abuse. It’s being sponsored by the area churches,” Zack told her.

It sounded pretty good, but Megan was still undecided. “I’m sure they mentioned it before today. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“My calculus teacher pulled me aside today and asked me if I was going tonight I told her no. She said if I would go, she would take my last quiz score off my grade. That would really help me in that class,” he admitted.

She knew he was struggling with calculus. “I guess it will be okay,” she said reluctantly, wanting to protect him like a mother hen, yet knowing he had to grow up.

“Thanks, Mom!” He gave her a kiss on the cheek and dashed off. Having permission to drive to Roanoke meant more to him than any lectures he and his friends would hear. It made the new driver feel like a big shot.

Megan prayed. It was the only thing she could do. Lord, I put Zack and his friends in Your hands and ask You to watch over and protect them. In Jesus’ name, amen.

It was after one o’clock before Zack came in that night. Megan was still up reading her Bible, waiting for him. Zack came to the opened door of his mother’s bedroom. “I’m home safe and sound,” he announced.

“Good, I was about to send out a search party,” she teased. “So how was it?”

Zack stared at his mother for a few seconds, then he went to her dresser and fiddled with the things on top. “It really wasn’t what I expected at all,” he admitted. “They had food and music and all kinds of stuff.”

“Well, did you learn anything?” Megan asked, trying to get a little information.

“Yeah, actually I got more than I expected out of going,” he said quietly.

Megan frowned. Usually he wanted to tell her everything, word for word. “Were the speakers interesting?” she asked, hoping to draw him out a little.

“It’s late. I’ll tell you about it another time. Okay?” he said, turning to face her.

“Sure, you can tell me about it tomorrow. I’m glad you’re home,” she said, but she knew something wasn’t right.

Zack walked out mumbling good-night.

“Sleep well!” Megan called, wondering if he and his friends had even gone to the conference. The way he was acting, she suspected they may have gone joy-riding instead!

Chapter Two

It was one of those rare afternoons when things were slow at Meadow Flowers. “Why don’t you let me close up today?” Ted offered.

“You know, that sounds kind of nice,” Megan agreed, knowing Ted was eager for more responsibility. She went home and put a roast in the oven for dinner. Zack was picking up Jess after school.

Megan turned on her “old music,” as the kids called it, and stretched out on the sofa. Closing her eyes, she tried to relax.

She was just beginning to unwind when someone knocked on the front door. No one ever came to the front door, except salesmen and uninvited guests. Reluctantly, she got up. Before she could reach the door, another sequence of hard knocks erupted. Somewhat irritated by the visitor’s impatience, Megan yanked open the door.

Her uninvited guest watched as the color drained from her face. He threw open the screen when she began to sway, and caught her just before she fell.

The man’s touch affected her like a lightning bolt. Megan jerked free, glared at him for a moment, then bolted into the depths of the house. Warily, he followed, and found her draped over the kitchen sink, heaving. Grabbing a towel, he wet it, then put it against her forehead.

Megan shoved him away and buried her face in the wet towel. As she regained a little of her composure, she straightened up.

“Well, you’re the last person I expected to see at the door. So…how are you, Mitchell?” Megan said, staring at him with enough anger in her eyes to sear him.

Mitchell looked away, disarmed by her fury. “I’ve been worse.”

“What are you doing here?” she asked, dazed.

“I was in town on business. I thought I’d come by and see the kids…and you,” he said hesitantly.

“Well, the children aren’t here and you can see I’m not doing too well,” she said crisply, as she wiped her face again. “Maybe it would be better if you left.”

“I just wanted to see all of you. I didn’t come to cause any trouble.”

“Just like that, Mitchell! You decide to drop by after ten years! Excuse me for not expecting you!” Her temper flared.

“I was afraid to call. I figured you’d refuse to see me,” he admitted.

Megan surveyed the visitor. His dark brown hair was tousled, as usual, with a bit of gray around the edges. He was wearing gray slacks, a white shirt and a red print tie. Not even close to the former dress of this man. He looked very fit and handsome. Her eyes met his. She looked for signs of alcohol, but saw only sadness. “Why are you back?”

“I couldn’t stay away any longer. It was time to come back,” he said softly.

“As always, you’ve only thought of yourself,” she snapped. “You come and go when it suits you. You don’t give a thought to how it will affect anyone else.”

“Is that what you think?” he asked, looking disappointed.

“What else should I think?”

“That maybe I’ve changed. That I love all of you. That I need to see my family.”

“Maybe we don’t need to see you. All you’ll do at this point is disrupt the children’s lives and upset them. We’ve gotten along fine without you so far.”

“I know it seems selfish, but I need to see them,” Mitchell said quietly.

“They aren’t here. You could stop by again in ten years or so.” She lashed out like a whip, and saw him flinch.

Before he could recover, the kitchen door flew open. Zack and Jess came hurrying in. Both stopped short at the sight of the man in the kitchen. Momentarily, Zack stared, then he rushed into his arms. “Dad!” The two held each other tightly, and time seemed to stop.

Jess stood back watching, obviously horrified.

After a long moment, father and son relinquished the hold they had on one another. Mitchell took his son’s face in his hands. “I missed you so much!”

“I missed you, too!” Zack exclaimed, tears rising in his eyes.

Mitchell turned to his daughter. “Jessica, I’m your daddy,” he said gently.

“Don’t you touch me!” Jess said distastefully, giving him a cold stare.

Zack nudged her. “Jess, it’s Dad!”

She shook her head, her eyes daring him to come near her.

“Maybe I should go,” Mitchell said.

“Why don’t you stay for dinner?” Zack asked suddenly.

Now it was Megan’s turn to look astonished.

Everyone was unsure how to proceed. Then Jess brought things to a complete standstill. “You’re not my father and you never will be.” She sneered. Her words had the same effect as a slap across the face. She looked at the hurt expression on Mitchell’s face, then ran to her room.

“She didn’t mean it, Dad,” Zack said, trying to salvage the moment.

“She meant it. I don’t blame her for feeling that way. I’m a lousy father,” Mitchell admitted, discouraged. He turned to leave.

Zack looked to his mother for help. “Mom!”

Megan couldn’t imagine how it would feel to have your child completely reject you. For a moment she felt sorry for Mitchell. Zack was giving her a pleading look. “We have plenty,” was all she could think to say. Not exactly an invitation, just a statement of fact.

Mitchell glanced at her. Then he looked at his son.

“Please, Dad. Don’t go,” Zack begged, flinging himself against his father in a crushing hold.

Megan watched the tender scene, heard them both sniffing. It was too much for her. She slipped out the back door and sat on the steps, trying to grasp the implications of this unannounced visit.

Before long Zack came out and sat beside her. “Mom, please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad at you,” she said calmly.

“Can Dad stay for dinner?” he asked.

Megan put herself in Mitchell’s place. It was a very grim picture. Zack wanted his father to stay so badly. She touched her son’s cheek. “Dinner will be ready soon.”

“Thanks, Mom,” he said, hugging her and dashing back inside.

A few minutes before Megan put dinner on the table, she went to get Jess from her room. “Dinner is almost ready,” she said, entering the bedroom.

“Is he staying?” Jess asked from her prone position across the bed.

“Yes. Zack wanted him to stay,” her mother admitted.

“Then I’m not coming down,” Jess said defiantly.

“Dinner will be on the table in five minutes. Be there!” Megan ordered, leaving no room for compromise.

She put everything on the table before she called everyone, thinking the less time spent with Mitchell, the better.

Zack came into the kitchen with Mitchell close behind. They sat down in silence. A few minutes passed. Mitchell dared to speak. “Isn’t Jessica joining us?”

“She’ll be here,” Megan stated confidently.

Within seconds Jess came in and took her place. Megan bowed her head and blessed the food. Then they proceeded with the meal without a word.

To break the hush, Mitchell asked Zack, “What subjects are you taking in school?”

Zack seemed relieved to have something to talk about. “English, Spanish, biology and calculus. I’m doing pretty good, but I’m having a little trouble with calculus,” he said, and went on describing his activities.

Jess occasionally peeked at Mitchell, while Megan seemed to be involved in creative food arranging. Time dragged as they waited for a reasonable amount of time to pass. At last the ordeal was over. The dishes were collected and put in the sink.

“May I be excused?” Jess asked, then escaped to her room.

Megan began washing the dishes, glad for something to do.

“Could I give you a hand?” Mitchell offered.

“No. I can do it by myself,” she told him quietly.

“Let me show you the farm,” Zack said, leading his father outside.

Megan tried to get a grip on herself while they were gone.

When the guys came back twenty minutes later, Mitchell tried to ease the tension. “That was a delicious dinner,” he complimented Megan. “You’ve really got the farm looking great.”

“Thank you,” Megan said, wiping the counter for the ninth time.

Behind Megan’s back, a look passed between the two males. “I have a lot of homework. I guess I better go do it. I’ll see you soon, Dad,” Zack said, giving his father a hug, then hurrying to his room.

Suddenly Megan found herself alone with Mitchell in a silence that was deafening. She went over to the kitchen door and stood beside it.

Taking the hint, Mitchell started for the door, then stopped before her. “You look wonderful,” he said casually.

“Thanks. Well, I guess we’ll see you in another decade or so,” she said curtly, letting him know it was past time to go.

“Megan, I’m moving back to Bedford,” he divulged.

She stared at him in disbelief. She felt like someone had knocked the air out of her.

“Could I ask you a question?” he asked humbly.

She didn’t answer, still stunned by his news.

“Are we still married?” he asked pointedly. When Megan didn’t answer, he picked up her left hand. She was wearing the two rings he’d given her years before.

Megan came to herself and jerked her hand free.

“Are we?” he asked gently, insisting on an answer.

“Yes!” Megan shrieked and pushed the screen door open.

“Could we possibly talk sometime?”

“I don’t see the purpose. We have nothing to talk about.” As soon as he stepped out, she closed and locked the door.

Why did he want to know if they were still married? What was he planning? Why didn’t he just stay gone? It would have been easier that way. “Lord, help me,” Megan said aloud.

After a restless sleep, Megan woke, hoping the night before had only been a nightmare. But the bad dream had been real.

“Dad looked great, didn’t he?” Zack asked cheerfully at breakfast.

Megan studied her son without comment. He’d always dreamed of his dad coming home—his hero.

“Didn’t you think he looked good?” Zack pushed for validation.

“He looked fine,” Megan admitted.

“He looked like you,” Jess said, gawking at Zack. “He’s not coming back is he?”

“Who knows?” Megan said with a shrug, trying to dismiss the matter.

“Of course he’s coming back,” Zack said.

“Don’t get your hopes up,” Megan warned, clearing the table. All kinds of thoughts started hitting her like arrows from an attacker. Then a missile. What if he were coming back to get a divorce so he could remarry? Maybe after that he would try to get custody of the children! Her head began spinning.

After work, Megan was at the kitchen table mulling over the Mitchell dilemma, when Ruth came in. “Want a cup of coffee?” she asked.

“Thanks. From the way you look, I guess he paid you a visit,” Ruth said.

“Yep. Is he staying with you?”

“No! I was shocked to see him. I can’t imagine how you feel,” Ruth added compassionately.

“Frightened,” Megan answered.

“I expected anger or disbelief.”

“Oh, they came first. Didn’t he tell you?”

“No. He came by my house first. We talked for a while. Then he wanted to know his marital status. I told him he should ask you. Soon after, he left.”

Megan’s eyes met her mother-in-law’s. “He asked me the same question. That’s why I’m frightened.” Ruth looked puzzled. “What if he came back to get a divorce? Then to get married again. Next he’ll want custody of my children!”

“Megan, that’s ridiculous. He wouldn’t do that,” Ruth said calmly.

“How do you know? He’s been gone ten years. We don’t know what he’s like anymore!” She knew she was beginning to sound hysterical.

“He just wants to see his family,” Ruth said soothingly.

“You’re his mother. A mother never gives up.”

“Have you given up? Has he been gone too long?”

“I don’t know,” she said thoughtfully. “I opened the front door and it was like looking at a ghost. I’ve never felt so unhinged. He just stood there staring at me. I thought maybe he wasn’t real. I’m not ready for this.”

“When do you think you will be?” Ruth looked at her hopefully.

“I don’t know. Maybe never,” Megan said angrily.

Ruth sipped her coffee. “How did last night go?”

“Well, I almost fainted. Then I threw up. After that the kids came home. Zack was thrilled and invited him to stay for dinner. Jess glared at him like he was an ax murderer. And I was…brittle.”

“Sounds like a fun evening.” Ruth chuckled. “When’s he coming back?”

“I have no idea.” Megan stared into her coffee cup.

“You know he’s going to want to see the kids.”

“I don’t have to let him. He has no part in their lives!” she said defensively.

“No, you don’t. But if he really wants to see them, he can go to court,” she replied realistically. “Why don’t you consider letting him see-them for a couple of hours at a time. Zack’s a big boy, he’ll watch out for Jess.”

“Did he ask you to come over here?” Megan asked suspiciously.

“No, but I’m caught in the middle anyway. It’s not like they’re babies and he could run off with them. If he tried that with Jess, you know he’d be bringing her back in short order when she got through with him.”

Megan laughed at the thought. Then the kids came in and the entire conversation was about Mitchell.

Megan went out to the porch swing. She hadn’t thought of anything else all day. She couldn’t take any more.

Later, Ruth came out to tell her goodbye. “Are you all right?” she asked. Megan shrugged. “You know, you’ll never find out if he’s changed if you don’t give him a chance,” Ruth said.

“I’ll pray about it,” Megan replied.

Ruth sat down beside her and gave her a long, soothing hug. “I can’t help it, Megan. He’s my son. I love him.”

“I know,” Megan said.

Ruth left, pondering all the problems. She had grown up in hard times. Her parents had worked themselves into early graves. Her siblings were spread over the country and she seldom saw them. The mainstays in her life were God and her family. When her husband died and her son disappeared, she didn’t know where to turn. God was her answer. She could do little now for her loved ones, other than to pray for them.

Thursday night after dinner, the children went to their monthly school skate. Megan was looking forward to the time alone. Before she could settle down, there was a knock on the front door. Once again she found Mitchell standing outside.

“You’re not going to faint this time are you?” he teased.

“No,” Megan snapped. “The children are out.” She started closing the door.

“I know. That’s why I came by. We need to talk about them,” he said.

Megan stopped short, knowing Ruth—her friend, his mother—had told him she would be alone.

“May I come in? Please?”

He didn’t sound demanding, only hopeful. Something in his humble attitude caused her to relent She opened the door and led him to the formal dining room, deciding the tone of this meeting would be business-like. As they sat down across the table from one another, their eyes met. Megan raised her head and stuck out her chin.

“You don’t want me to see them at all, do you?” Mitchell asked patiently.

“Not really,” she replied with cold, hard honesty.

“Would you rather we go through the courts?” he asked.

“No!” Megan had been to that madhouse with business problems. She wasn’t about to trust them with her children.

“Can we come to an agreement?” he asked, never taking his eyes off her.

“I’ll consider letting you see them, as long as you follow certain conditions,” she said in a strained voice.

“Such as?”

“There will be absolutely no drinking. If there is, don’t ever ask to see them again,” she ordered staunchly.

“I don’t drink anymore,” he said, without looking away.

Megan was taken aback, but she continued on. “No overnight visits. If you take them out, both go. I’ll want to know where you’re going, what you’ll be doing…and no one else goes along,” she ordered.

He frowned at the last one. “What do you mean, no one goes along?”

“I don’t want girlfriends or ‘ol’ buddies’ or whatever going along. If you can’t spend time with the children alone, then don’t bother,” she said emphatically.

“No problem,” he responded seriously. Then his tone softened. “Could I ask one favor?” Megan waited without responding; she wasn’t going to give him any help. Mitchell took a deep breath. “Would you give me a little help with Jessica?”

Megan rubbed her temples, considering his request. Jess was ready to reject him and forget it. Megan almost welcomed the idea. She knew it wasn’t right to turn Jess against her father. She’d never done it before. Was she going to start now? She looked across the table at Mitch. “All right, but don’t expect too much from her.” She sighed.

“I understand. Could I possibly take the kids out this weekend?” he asked.

“I’ll have to think about it. Call me on Saturday,” she said, and stood up. The meeting was over.

Mitchell followed her to the door and stopped. “You’ve been more generous than I deserve. Thank you,” he said gratefully.

“Don’t disappoint my children!” she warned, holding the screen door open.

Megan immediately closed the door and leaned against it. Why did his visits rattle her so? And how was she going to be able to let him see her kids?

She was the one who had always been there for them. The one who had spent sleepless nights taking care of them. The one who was there for the plays and programs, who bandaged the cuts and scrapes. The one with them when they were sad or lonely or scared or just out of sorts. The one who helped them with their homework, buried their pets, and saw them through disappointments. Now, ten years later, Mitchell wanted to reappear and be their daddy. Where was he when they needed him? Where was he when she needed him?

Unsettled after Mitchell’s visit, Megan needed to get out of the house. She wandered down the road to the river. On her way, she had visions of Zack and Jess, at earlier ages, scampering ahead of her. They had traveled this way together often.

It was wonderful watching her children romp and play as they were growing up. In the winter they would sleigh ride on the hills and build snowmen. In the spring they would pick wild flowers and watch the land come to life. In the summer they would swim in the river and go fishing. In the fall they would climb the foothills into the mountains and camp out once in a while.

Megan sat down on the riverbank. She would never forget those times, but it would never be like that again. In a couple of years, Zack would be leaving for college. Jess was already getting involved in school and spending time with her friends. Now they’d be fitting “daddy” in their time, too. She imagined herself last on the list—lonely and forgotten.

Megan felt tears as she thought of what the future might hold. Why did he have to come back? Why, God? We’ve made it this far without him. Why is he back?

Megan looked around at her farm. Why did Mitchell make her feel so insecure? She had two wonderful children and a successful business. She had no right to complain. She could kick herself for giving in to self-pity.

Her thoughts turned to Mitchell. Visions of homeless men, drunks staggering around in a stupor, living in alleys and digging through Dumpsters for food, flashed through her mind. She shuddered.

Over the years, she had wondered how Mitchell looked. Now she knew. The straight nose was somewhat crooked. The unruly hair hadn’t changed much. The strong jaw seemed as determined as ever. The eyes were where she saw a change. They were no longer blank and empty, but peaceful—yet sad. He used to be unable to look her in the eye. Now he stared without flinching. That flustered her and put her on the defensive.

She thought back over her conversation with him. If she’d told him he could only see the children for five minutes once a year, he probably would have accepted. It made her so sad to think of the scraps he’d settle for, when he could have had it all.

All the land before her eyes could have been theirs. I’ll never understand how he just gave up his family. I’m tired of being haunted by regrets and guilt. I was the best wife I knew how to be. If that wasn’t enough, I’m sorry.

Early Saturday morning the phone rang. Megan let it ring a few times before answering it, afraid it was Mitchell.

“What did you decide?” he asked as soon as he heard her voice.

“You can pick them up at one today and take them out for a couple of hours,” she said reluctantly. “We’ll see how it goes. Where do you plan to take them?”

“To play putt-putt golf, or we’ll go roller skating if that suits you,” he said eagerly.

“Either is fine. Things better go right,” she warned and hung up.

When she told the kids, Zack was ready to go. Jess was infuriated. “I don’t want to go out with him! I don’t know him. I won’t go!” she insisted and started to stomp out.

“Both of you will go out with your father this afternoon,” Megan said firmly.

“Mom!” Jess pleaded. “I don’t want to go.”

“Jess, he’s your father. You should at least give him a chance,” she reasoned.

“Why? He never bothered to notice I was alive. He’s not my father. He’s just some guy that showed up the other night that I don’t know!” Jess shouted.

Megan stared at her calmly. She had expected this. “This will give you a chance to get to know him. He’s picking both of you up at one. Be ready.”

“Thanks a lot, Mom!” Jess shouted and ran to her room.

“Well, that went better than I expected,” Zack commented sarcastically.

Megan flashed him an unsteady smile. He had always been the easy child. Jessica had fought from the day she was born. She never went along with the plan. Megan had learned simply to put her foot down and to end the discussion.

This time, Jess was right. Her father was a stranger. Megan had given Mitchell her word to give Jess a little push in his direction. If this visit didn’t go well, she would push no more.

Megan left Jess in her room, sulking, and went to work feeling guilty.

At twelve o’clock she locked the shop and walked home with Zack. He was also feeling unsettled. “Mom, nothing will ever come between us. But sometimes…I need Dad.” He almost sounded as though he was apologizing.

“I told him I would let him see you, but if anything isn’t right, I expect you to tell me. If anything happens that shouldn’t, I’ll come and get you,” she said firmly.

“Mom, nothing will happen,” he assured her.

“Zack, the last time you saw your father, you were a little boy. He wasn’t like he seemed to you. He had problems, big problems. He may still have them. If he does, I don’t want either one of you with him. Do you understand?”

Zack nodded, but she could tell he was itching to argue on his father’s behalf.

Just before one, Megan went to see if Jess was ready. She felt like she was pushing her daughter into the lion’s den, but she found Jess sitting on her bed, waiting patiently, with her frilliest dress on. Megan reconsidered. Maybe it was Mitchell she should be feeling sorry for.

It was exactly one when Mitchell pulled in the driveway. Megan watched from the door as Zack and Jess climbed into the strange car. It drove away. But somewhere in her heart, she knew they would be back by three safe and sound.

Actually, they were back five minutes early. Mitchell evidently wasn’t taking any chances on getting on Megan’s wrong side again.

Jess came flying in the door and headed straight for her room. “Is everything all right?” Megan asked as Zack came in.

“Yeah. Great! We went to play putt-putt golf. Jess seemed to have a good time, but she’d never admit it. Dad’s out on the porch. He wants to talk to you,” he said, looking hopeful.

Megan went charging out the door, then stopped short when she found Mitchell perched on the porch railing in a familiar pose.

Memories seemed to have overcome Mitchell as he looked off into the distance. He appeared to snap back to reality at the irritated edge to Megan’s voice. “Zack said you wanted to talk to me.”

“I thought I’d let you know today went pretty well, thanks to you,” he admitted.

Megan didn’t know what to say. “Did Jess give you a hard time?”

“She was a little icy.” He grimaced.

“Then you fared well. I had to force her to go. By the way, she picked the outfit.”

He laughed. “I wondered about that.” Another uncomfortable silence followed. “Look, I just wanted to tell you, I didn’t come back to cause trouble or hurt anyone. I just want to get to know my kids. I’ve missed enough already.”

Why? Megan wondered. After all this time, why did you bother to come back? Instead she said, “I hope life is better for you now than it was when you left.”

“Much better. Thank God,” he said easily.

“I’m glad,” she said, turning to go into the house.

“Could I possibly take them out again tomorrow?” he asked quickly.

“We go to church.” It was the only thing she could think of to say.

“Later in the afternoon maybe?”

“Two, back by five,” Megan ordered officially.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, teasingly.

She glared at him. “Where do you plan on going?”

“To a movie or roller skating—depending on how Jess dresses.”

“Fine,” she said, turning to go in. He was learning fast. He already had it covered no matter how Jess dressed.

“See ya,” Mitchell called after her. Like old times.

Megan heard him, but she chose not to respond. Feeling in her heart that old empty ache of love gone wrong. “’Bye, Mitch,” she whispered to herself.

Inside Zack was waiting to ambush her, wanting to tell her all about the afternoon. “Mom, it was so great! Dad said…Dad did…Dad likes…” He went on and on as Megan listened patiently.

“He asked if he could see you both again tomorrow,” she added, when he took a breath.

“You told him yes, didn’t you?”

“He’s picking you up at two.”

Jess was coming down the stairs and overheard them talking. She rushed into the room. “Oh no, not again. I’m not going out with him!” she roared.

“Ah, Jess, you know you had a good time today,” Zack said. “Stop acting like such a baby!”

“What’s the problem, Jess?” Megan asked, feeling guilty for forcing her.

Her daughter shrugged and made a face. “I don’t know.”

“So, nothing’s really wrong. You just don’t want to go. Right?”

“Mom,” she began to whine, but the look on her mother’s face told her it was a waste of time.

“I believe you need to at least give him a chance. Don’t you?” Megan asked.

Jess nodded slightly.

The next morning at church, Megan heard little of the service. She was too busy asking God why, then not listening for His reply.

That afternoon Mitchell took the children roller skating. He felt that was safe, since Jess came out in jeans that looked well worn. Unbeknownst to him, skating was one of her favorite pastimes.

Jess had decided ahead of time that this wasn’t going to be any fun. When there was a couples skate, she refused to skate with Mitchell. Zack went off with a girl he knew from school.

Later, she fell skating. When Mitchell rushed to help her, she shrieked, “Leave me alone!” loud enough to turn a few heads in their direction. From then on, she made him as miserable as possible. He ended up bringing them home early.

“Come on in, I want you to see my science project,” Zack said, dragging his reluctant father inside.

Megan was nowhere in sight, so Jess began searching for her. She found her on the swing on the back porch. “Mom, I fell and hurt my leg really bad,” Jess moaned as she limped over.

“Let me see,” Megan said, making room beside her.

Jess sat down and pulled up the leg of her pants. Then she stuck her leg in her mother’s face for her to examine closely.

“Oh! You really bruised that, didn’t you,” Megan said, knowing Jess wanted sympathy, even though there was hardly a mark.

“It hurts a lot. I wanted to come home, but he made me stay,” she said pitifully.

Megan grabbed Jess and hugged her firmly. “You know something?”

“What?” Jess growled.

“I love you,” Megan giggled and gave Jess a kiss.

Jess wasn’t giving up yet. “I missed you. I kept thinking about you here all alone. Maybe next time Zack could go and I could keep you company.”

“I was fine. I.got some reading done.” Megan held up her book.

Jess was trying to figure out her next maneuver, when Mitchell came out the door. “I just wanted to tell you goodbye,” he said quietly.

“I was showing Mommy my leg,” she said, glaring at him accusingly.

“I’m sorry you got hurt,” he said.

Jess was having none of it. She got out of the swing and started to march inside, then remembered to limp.

Megan saw Mitchell’s bewildered expression. “Hold it, young lady! Don’t you have something to say?”

Jess swallowed her arrogant attitude. “Thank you for taking us skating,” she said, then quickly escaped.

Mitchell watched until she was inside. Then he turned his attention to Megan, who had a frown on her face. “What?” he asked, confused.

“She really has you hopping,” Megan commented.

“She hates me. She as much as told me so.”

“She still might. She’s no angel. She may look like one, but inside beats the heart of a true cynic, or so she’d like us to believe,” Megan said knowingly.

“You’re very smug,” he said.

“Well, if she keeps this up, you’ll be dancing to her tune. That will suit her fine.”

“I’ll call about the next time,” he said, flustered, and started off the porch.

“After two visits are you running scared?” she asked haughtily.

He turned back to face her. “You know, I never remember you being spiteful!”

“I never remember you being a coward!”

“A coward!” he said, amazed by the accusation.

“You’re having second thoughts because a child you neglected for ten years hasn’t taken to you right away! If you’re truly interested in a relationship with your daughter, it will take more than two afternoons of fun and games. You’re the one who came back and started this. So don’t blame Jess! Make up your mind if you really want to be a father, because neither one of them needs to be hurt again,” she said bitterly.

Megan’s words stung. Jess wasn’t like Zack, who was ready to welcome him home. Jess wanted nothing to do with him. His shoulders sagged as he thought of what he would have to face to build a relationship with her.

Megan noted his defeated look. “Look, she doesn’t want a father or a mother or a grandmother or anyone else telling her what to do or how to do it. It’s not just you.”

Mitchell looked perplexed. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I know Jess. She’s a pro, you’re not. She’s made teachers cry. She has this knack for making people feel guilty and unworthy, and she does it well. Most of it’s a facade—she’s really a sweetheart underneath. Don’t give up on her too easily. She’s worth the effort.” Megan’s expression softened.

Mitchell leaned against the porch railing. “I apologize for calling you spiteful.”

“Don’t make any rash decisions,” she warned.

“Do you still consider me a coward?”

She raised her eyebrows. “We’ll see.”

“I’ll be out of town on business for the next week. That’s why I said I’d call about the next visit,” he explained. “If you should need to get in touch with me for any reason, call See Life. They’ll know how to locate me.”

“Lucky them. We’ll manage,” she added dryly.

“How well I know you can manage alone. I’m reminded of that fact every time I come out here. Regardless, if an emergency comes up, call me. Please.”

Megan shrugged. “If that’s what you want. Who should I call, Sea Fish?”

“See Life,” he repeated. “It should be a new listing.” He started to leave, then he turned back to enlighten her a bit. “You know Jess gets it from you.”

“Not all of it,” Megan said, giving him a look that made him realize he was on shaky ground. She picked up her book, letting him know he could leave now.

“I’ll call while I’m gone,” he repeated.

“Suit yourself,” Megan answered without looking up. Thank goodness she wouldn’t have to deal with him for a few days. Maybe he wouldn’t bother to come back.

“See ya,” Mitchell said quietly, and left.

Chapter Three

Megan relaxed a little with Mitchell out of town. Then she began thinking. Maybe he had left again for good. She decided to call Sea Weed, or whatever, to see if he had been telling her the truth.

She dialed information. “I’d like a new listing, Sea something-or-other.”

The operator gave her the information and she punched in the numbers. “See Life. May I help you?” a friendly female voice asked.

“Yes. Do you have a Mitchell Whitney employed there?” she asked.

“Oh, yes. But Mr. Whitney is out of town. Could I take a message?”

“Could you possibly tell me Mr. Whitney’s position?”

“Well, Mr. Whitney handles everything. Could I tell him who’s calling?” she asked.

“No, thank you,” Megan said, hanging up. So he had a job. Big deal.

On Monday morning, Megan cheerfully answered the phone. “Meadow Flowers. How can I help you?”

“You could tell me you missed me,” Mitchell said timidly.

“I didn’t know you’d be back so soon,” she replied indifferently.

“I missed you guys,” he admitted anyway. “Would it be possible for me to see the kids tonight?”

“It’s not a good idea for them to be out late on school nights,” she said, trying to put him off. Just hearing his voice, she was tensing up again.

“We’ll go out for pizza and a quick trip to the mall, and be home by seven,” he persisted.

Megan thought of Zack. He’d been waiting all week to see his father. “They get home around 3:45. I’ll leave a note saying you’ll pick them up at four.”

“Would you care to join us?” he asked, then waited through a long silence.

“I have to work late,” she said, and hung up.

With the kids out of the house, Megan again began thinking of the past. Everything had been wonderful the first few years. She and Mitchell had gotten married right out of high school. A couple of years later, Zack had been born. Mitchell was beside her through everything. Mitch would get up with her to feed Zack. Then they would stand by his crib and watch him sleep. If something had been wrong with the relationship, she hadn’t seen it.

Later Mitch wasn’t happy with his job. They saved for him to go to night school, but as soon as he started, one thing or another went wrong. Mitch started going out with some of the guys after work to commiserate over a few beers.

It wasn’t long before Mitchell was missing some of his classes and neglecting to study. He began making careless mistakes at work, then not showing up for work. He didn’t show up for work one time too many. They fired him.

His father put the pressure on him and told him to shape up. Everything was fine for a while. Things were going well, except that he was still meeting the “ol’ buddies” every now and then.

Then without warning, Mitchell’s father died. The two of them had been really close, and Mitchell took his father’s death hard. No longer was the man he loved and respected there to jerk him up short when he needed it.

It was about that time that Mitchell began spending his weekends drinking with “the guys.” Everything started to add up again. Only this time he began pulling into himself and away from his family. But all that was the past. Megan didn’t want to think about it anymore. She went to wash clothes to keep occupied.

She was in her room, reading, when the kids came home. Jess dashed in with a shopping bag in hand and flopped down beside her. “Look what I got!” she exclaimed excitedly, pulling out a pair of dress boots.

Megan had seen them before, when she told Jess they were too expensive and looked too old for her. “You talked your dad into buying them?”

“He thought they were pretty and he didn’t mind getting them for me,” Jess jabbered.

Then Zack came in carrying a shopping bag. He showed his mother two pairs of jeans and a nice sweatshirt. “Dad got some jeans and a shirt. He wanted to buy us something,” he explained in an apologetic tone.

“That was nice of him,” Megan said.

“Mom, he asks about you every time we go out,” Zack said.

“I’ve got homework,” Jess said, obviously bored. She seemed disappointed that her mother hadn’t gotten mad at her dad for buying the boots. Hadn’t made him take them back.

“Mom, you could be a little nicer to him,” Zack pushed.

“Zack, go do your homework!”

“Mom, we used to be so happy. It could be that way again.”

Megan got up. “I need to see if the doors are locked.”

“I locked them when we came in,” said Zack, and continued to badger her. “You always told us everyone deserves a second chance. Why doesn’t that pertain to Dad?”

She stopped short. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. I gave him chance after chance after chance. Face it, Zack, he chose alcohol over us.”

“He was drinking then. He’s not now. He’s changed.”

Megan stared at her son, unmoved.

“Give him another chance. You’d do that for a stranger,” he pointed out.

It was ironic that Zack was defending his father to her. “You just don’t understand, Zack. He broke my trust in him. He just walked away and never even got in touch with me. He broke my heart,” she added.

“But he came back!” he argued.

“Too late.”

“Only because you won’t give him a chance.”

Megan’s mouth gaped opened. It took her a few seconds to pull herself together. “I didn’t leave. He did,” she said quietly.

The next morning Megan was sipping a cup of coffee, when Zack came downstairs.

“I’m sorry about last night,” Zack admitted stiffly.

“I’m glad your dad is back for you. Can’t you accept that and be happy?”

“I still think you two should at least try to be friends. If for no other reason than for Jess and me. We need parents who aren’t at each other’s throats,” he said dryly.

“I’ll think about what you said,” Megan conceded.

“Dad wants us to go out with him for dinner Wednesday night.”

Megan nodded that she heard him, but said nothing.

Wednesday night Megan fixed a snack, turned on the radio to her favorite oldies station, and sat at the kitchen table to do some book work. Right at seven, the children came in.

“Mom, do you mind if Dad and I watch the game here?” Zack asked, his displeasure with her still showing. “If you do, we can go to his place.”

“Here is fine,” Megan answered quickly, knowing Zack was testing her. The last thing she wanted was her son hanging out at Mitchell’s place.

Mitchell had refused to come in until Zack got permission. As they came through the kitchen, Mitchell spoke, Megan nodded.

Later, Megan heard Jess in the family room with them. She shook her head in amazement. Jess put up such a front that she hated Mitchell.

When the game was over, Zack made his exit before Mitchell reached the kitchen. “’Night, Dad,” he said, and dashed up the stairs.

“We’ll do something this weekend,” Mitchell called after him.

Megan grumbled and started erasing frantically.

“Problems?” Mitchell asked.

Megan dropped the pencil and began to rub her temples. “I’ve been at it too long. All the numbers keep coming up wrong,” she confessed.

He peeped over her shoulder. “Maybe I could help?”

Megan knew he was good in math, and she was’ tired. She slid the adding machine over to the next chair.

Mitch ran up the figures twice. Then he rechecked his numbers against hers. “You transposed some numbers,” he said, showing her.

Megan leaned back in the chair. “Numbers never were my thing.”

“I remember.”

She got up. “Want some coffee?”

“Would you mind?” he asked.

“No. I wanted to ask how things were going.” She poured him a cup and added one sugar. When she realized what she had done, she glanced at him, hoping he hadn’t noticed. He was grinning at her. She dumped in another sugar. “So, how are things?” she asked casually, handing him the cup.

“I’m not sure,” he admitted.

Megan propped her head on her hands. “You’re doing okay.”

“How do you know?” he asked, frowning.

She smiled. “Because Jess doesn’t like to watch sports on TV.”

Mitchell looked surprised. “Thanks. I needed to hear that.”

Their eyes caught in uncertainty. Megan felt her expression turn from smiling and happy to clouded and sad. Then her eyes became watery and she dropped her head between her arms for a moment.

“Thanks for the help,” she said, lifting her head, her composure regained.

Mitchell got to his feet. “I better get going. Thanks for the coffee.” Neither had touched it.

Walking back to his car, Mitchell wondered what was going through Megan’s mind. So many times she had been willing to help him. And instead of accepting, what had he done? Thrown all of her caring and love back in her face by leaving her. He had been such a fool. He had made a lot of mistakes. He couldn’t just forget them. He had to try to right them. And it might take him a long time. He needed to find a place where they could begin again.

As the longer days of spring arrived, Megan’s busy season began, and working late became the norm.

The kids barely noticed. Zack gave up time with his friends to be with his father. Jess was enjoying all the benefits, but still being a brat.

Ruth saw her son on a regular basis. Most of the time he came over to cut the grass or take care of some other job that needed doing. She figured that he was trying to make up for the past.

When Megan’s sister, Cass, heard Mitchell was back, she wasted no time before calling. Cass never had anything good to say about Mitchell. She felt her sister had married the wrong man. She always held up her extravagant life to Megan as an example to strive for. As soon as Megan answered the phone, Cass started right in.

“Megan, I heard Mitchell’s back in town. I certainly hope you’re keeping Jessica and Zachary away from him!”

“Hi, Cass. How are you?” Megan asked, ignoring her sister’s comment.

“Why didn’t you tell me? You’re letting him see them, aren’t you!” she accused. “You know you really have no sense at all when it comes to that man. He has no right to see them. He deserted you! Tell him he can do you a favor and get lost for the rest of your life. Then maybe you can start living again!”

“Cass, Mitchell is and always will be the children’s father. That’s all there is to it.”

“From my standpoint, he has no rights at all. He gave them up when he walked out on you.” Then a new thought came to Cass. “You’ll be the one he wants to see next. Then what?” She waited only a second before she started in again. “I’ll tell you what will happen. He’ll move in with you. Then he’ll take over your business and ruin that for you. Then you and the children can be penniless again when he takes off to who-knows-where. Megan, wake up! The man’s no good. You were just too young and naive to see it before. Surely you’ve smartened up a little over the years.”

“I’ve got to go, Cass. Talk to you soon,” Megan said, and hung up.

But Cass just couldn’t leave it alone. She called their parents and got them all stirred up. Before the night was over, they called Megan.

“Megan, what on earth is going on there? Cass is frantic. She says Mitch is back and up to his old tricks again!” her father bellowed as soon as she answered the phone.

“Dad, he moved back to Bedford. I had nothing to do with it.”

“I can’t believe you’re letting him see the children. What right does he have? He could get Zack involved in the wrong things. And how is poor Jess? I’m sure she’s horrified by all this. How could you, Megan?” he raged.

Then her mother got on the phone. “Megan, why are you letting him see the children?” she asked a little more gently.

“Mom, Zack is sixteen and he wants to see his father. If I forbid him, I’ll be forcing him to go behind my back. He loves his father. Jess is another matter. I’m doing the best I know, and that’s all I can do.”

“Megan, it’s your job to protect them. They’re only children. Zack is still impressionable. Mitchell could sway him the wrong way. And it’s not fair to force Jess to get to know a man who never cared for her.”

“Mom, I know this is a very emotional issue for both of you, it is for me too. But I have to do what I think is best.”

“Well, you’ve taken a big risk with your children’s futures. I hope you know that. Use your head instead of your heart,” her mother advised.

When she got a chance, she told them goodbye and hung up.

The entire week had gone like that. Everyone was so good at giving her advice. But no one had been there to help after Mitchell left, except Ruth and Doc. Cass had been too busy with her social life. Her parents had been in the process of retiring and moving to Florida. Her friends had had their own problems.

It was the same all over again. Everyone had something to say and they expected Megan to take their advice. She was weary from defending herself. Zack was encouraging her to spend time with Mitchell and give him a chance to prove himself.

Jess was in a class all by herself. She managed to find ways to make her mother feel guilty about making her see her father. That was Jess.

One evening, Megan came dragging home from work. Mitchell was planning to take the kids out to dinner. She figured she would stay in her room until they left. She was halfway up the stairs when someone knocked on the front door. It was too early for Mitchell, and besides, he had finally learned to use the kitchen door. Who on earth could it be? She retraced her steps and opened the door. Mitchell was standing there, looking nervous.

“The kids aren’t quite ready yet,” she said, motioning for him to come in.

“Good. I wanted to talk to you first,” he said, looking anywhere but at her.

“Is anything wrong?” she asked concerned.

“No. I just wanted to ask you something without them around,” he said, shuffling from one foot to the other.

Before he could get to the point, the kids came rushing down the stairs. Zack came to a halt when he saw a wrapped box in his father’s hand.

“Would both of you wait for me in the other room?” Mitchell requested.

“Sure,” Zack answered, hauling Jess along with him.

“Why? What’s going on?” Jess’s radar was up, then she saw the box. She let Zack lead her to just inside the kitchen. Then she abruptly stopped, and shushed her brother so she could listen.

Megan stood before Mitchell with her shoulders slumped and her head down, waiting for bad news. She hadn’t even noticed the box. He handed it to her. “For me?” she asked stunned and gingerly took it.

He smiled weakly. “It’s candy. I figure you have enough flowers.”

“Why are you giving me a gift?” she asked, suddenly feeling like crying.

“Meg…will you go out with me?” he pleaded.

Her head snapped up. “Wh-what?”

“I’m asking you to go out with me—on a date,” he admitted tensely.

Her eyes searched his. Was this some sort of joke? The look on his face told her it wasn’t. She was about to refuse, when Jess came bolting into the foyer.

“A date!” she screeched, fighting Zack off as she made her way to her mother. “Mom, you can’t go on a date!” she ordered, pulling her mother to face her. “You’re too old. I won’t let you go out with him!” she shrieked.

That did it. Megan had absolutely had enough of everyone telling her what to do. She glared at Jessica, who had just reminded her that she was almost as old as she felt. She turned back to Mitchell. “Exactly what did you have in mind?” she snapped.

“Dinner and a movie,” he said quickly, knowing she was about to explode. “A nice restaurant with real menus and tablecloths. No fast food. Then a buy-a-ticket, fresh-popcorn-type movie.”

“When?”

“Saturday night?” he sputtered.

“Fine,” Megan said, taking the box of candy and marching up the stairs without another word. Hot with anger she reached her room and flung the box of candy on the bed. She’d really sunk to a new low when a ten-year-old thought she could tell her what she could and couldn’t do. She was tired of everyone telling her how to run her life. She stomped around her room several times muttering to herself. “I don’t need Jess or Zack or anyone else telling me what to do.” It was then she realized that she had just told Mitchell she would go out with him! How could she be so stupid?

She spun around and dashed out of her room and back down the stairs. She ripped opened the front door, just in time to see the taillights disappear down the road.

Wearily she climbed the stairs. Maybe if she took a hot bath, it would stop her head from throbbing.

She stayed in the tub until she was wrinkled like a prune, but it didn’t help much. Wrapped in her robe, she flopped across the bed, noticing a card attached to the box. She slowly opened it. Meg, please give me a chance. Mitch.

Exasperated, she tore open the candy and stuffed a piece in her mouth. How did he manage to ask her out when her guard was down? If Jess hadn’t come rushing in giving her orders, she would have said no!

She got up, popping another piece of candy in her mouth. She went over to the dresser and opened the drawer that held her special treasures. She dug around until she found a box with pictures, then began sifting through them.

Megan found the picture of her first date with Mitchell. They had been on their way to a school dance. She touched his face in the picture.

She sat on the bed, remembering that night. Mitch had been so sweet. He had brought her a single, red rose. When he looked in her eyes, she had gone weak in the knees. When they slow danced, he sang to her.

After the dance, he drove her straight home. At the door, he asked if he could kiss her good-night. She sighed as she remembered. He had gently taken her face in his hands and, looking in her eyes, he had kissed her ever so softly.

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