# In God's Own Time

Ruth Scofield

DID SHE DARE SAY, "I DO"?Marry Kelsey Jamison–and take on his five rambunctious children? Meg Lawrence knew she was crazy to even consider it.Years ago, with his flashing eyes and sunny smile, Kelsey had shared his heartfelt hopes. But he'd chosen another to share his name, crushing Meg's secret dreams.Now Meg had come home, sophisticated and successful. And Kelsey was free, struggling to run a farm and care for his family. Could Meg accept Kelsey's offer of respect and affection? Meg prayed for an answer–wondering if, in God's own time, she'd finally win the love she patiently waited for…Welcome to Love Inspired™–stories about life, faith and love that will lift your spirits and gladden your heart!

## Table of Contents

Cover Page

Excerpt

About the Author

Title Page

Epigraph

Dedication

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Epilogue

Dear Reader

Copyright

## The children cried out for a mother. He wanted a wife…

The more Kelsey tried to shake the idea of asking Meg to marry him, to come and make harmony of his chaotic days, to share with him the raising of his children, the more the idea grew.

Meg. Pretty and sweet tempered in a way that was seldom seen in this day and age. Yet a nineties woman for all that, smartly intelligent, efficient and seemingly tireless.

How impossible was it? His kids needed a mother, all right, all five of them. Who better than Meg? Whom he knew and liked—even loved—as a friend?

And what would she get out of it? His affection? He wasn’t sure if he had any love left to offer a woman.

But Meg will know all that without any explanation, his heart murmured. Asking Meg to marry him would be like asking a part of himself to come home.

## RUTH SCOFIELD

became serious about writing after she’d raised her children. Until then she’d concentrated her life on being a June Cleaver-type wife and mother, spent years as a Bible student and teacher for teens and young adults, and led a weekly women’s prayer group. When she’d made a final wedding dress and her last child had left the nest, she declared to one and all that it was her turn to activate a dream. Thankfully, her husband applauded her decision.

Ruth began school in an old-fashioned rural two-room schoolhouse and grew up in the days before television, giving substance to her notion that she still has one foot in the last century. However, active involvement with six rambunctious grandchildren has her eagerly looking forward to the next millennium. After living on the East Coast for years, Ruth and her husband now live in Missouri.

## In God’s Own Time. Ruth Scofield


www.millsandboon.co.uk

Delight yourselves in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.

—Psalms 37:4

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in time of trouble.

—Psalms 46:1

I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.

—Philippians 4:13

For my daughter Karen, who gives all of her heart wherever it is needed—especially to children.

## Chapter One

Meg Lawrence almost tripped down the step when she glanced up and saw Kelsey Jamison pull his nine-year-old road-dirt blue car into the far side of the church parking lot. He shut off the motor and remained where he was, eyes to the front, obviously waiting for his children to emerge from the crowded church.

She stood for an instant, letting people stream around her, and ordered her heart to right itself. His profile showed her a familiar straight nose, both sunburned and tanned, and the edge of his mouth—a mouth she most often remembered in laughter—before he dipped his head and his straw cowboy hat hid her view.

Did his green eyes still dance with teasing humor when he told a funny story? Did he, she wondered, still have the knack of turning around an innocent comment someone offered to suit himself, and then laugh gently as if they shared an inside joke?

Those mossy colored eyes had made her feel those moments were ones of personal sharing when she was young; memories she’d held close.

Kelsey hadn’t seen her, and Meg perversely turned on her heel and reentered the church building. It wasn’t that she hadn’t expected to see him sometime or other. After all, their small town and surrounding countryside community left little room for anonymity, and really, she’d counted on seeing him and his children. But she’d planned—she’d hoped—it would be on her own terms, not in the middle of the church parking lot, with scores of onlookers. Five years was a long time not to have seen the man who’d owned her heart since she was fifteen.

And still did seventeen years later.

Meg drew a deep breath and let it go. The last five years had covered so much of life’s rocky bumps, his and her own. The main one being the death of her cousin Dee Dee…his wife.

“Meg Lawrence, you sure are a welcome sight.” Sandy Yoder, one of her mother’s buddies greeted her in the middle of the crowded church hall. “When did you get in? Yesterday, I suppose. I just know your mama was happier’n a June bug to see you. Is she any better?”

Meg hated to be rude, but she heartily wished she had entered the building from the opposite door. She’d already said hello and exchanged news with most of the three hundred or so of the church membership this morning, and Sandy would keep her talking about nothing and everything, making her late home.

“Hi, Sandy. Yes, Mother’s very glad I’m home. Excuse me, but I just want to, um, ask for this morning’s sermon on tape for her.” She moved to edge past her, but a bump from behind shoved her into two teenage girls trying to get through the crush going the opposite way.

“Oh, sorry, honey, I—Lissa?” The young girl stood only a few inches short of her own five foot nine inches, surprising Meg as she glanced into the girl’s face.

“And Aimee.” She confirmed the younger girl’s identity and broke into a broad smile.

Her thoughts scrambled to remember how old they were now.

Yet with one breath, she recalled How could she not, when she’d been around their mother so much during their births and after. Lissa had to be fourteen now and Aimee twelve.

“Hi, Aunt Meg,” Lissa said eagerly. She glanced at Mrs. Yoder for a moment before meeting Meg’s gaze. There was hope and hesitancy in the girl’s green eyes, so like Kelsey’s. “We thought we’d missed you.”

“Yeah, we wanted to see you right away before you—” Aimee, dark-eyed, with her expression eager for adventure like her mother, was effectively cut off by her sister’s elbow. “Um, I mean, before you go back to England. Last time you were home, we got to see you only for a few minutes.”

“Oh, girls…” Meg’s heart warmed immediately even though she felt a tug of guilt for neglecting them so long. She drew them into a hug. Lissa returned the embrace shyly while Aimee’s was unequivocally enthusiastic. “I’m sorry about last time. But we’ll definitely make time together this visit. Days and days of it, if we’re lucky.”

Mrs. Yoder placed a hand on her shoulder with a look of mild reproof at being ignored. “I must go. Happy you’re home, Meg, dear, and I’ll be by to see your mother in a day or so.” The woman added portentously, “She does need you, you know.”

“Yes, Mrs. Yoder,” she answered soberly. “I’ll look forward to seeing you then.”

Meg waited until the older woman had turned away before she grinned at the two young girls. She felt suddenly happy and younger, as though the three of them shared a special understanding. They grinned back. She took their elbows and started for the door. “I hate to pull that old saw on you girls, but—”

“My goodness, how you’ve grown,” Aimee said, laughing, her voice joining Meg’s.

Lissa rolled her eyes as Meg groaned.

“Terrible, isn’t it?” Meg confided with a grimace. “I used to hate it when people said that to me. Especially since I kept growing and growing, both up and out.”

She’d been a large child for her age, and a big girl. The comments about her size hadn’t always been kind, and Meg had had to work hard to cover her sensitive feelings. Even now she filled a size sixteen admirably, but she no longer cared that she wasn’t a sprite. She exercised, ate a balanced diet and accepted herself the way she was.

Meg looked at the two girls, noting Aimee’s slender resemblance to Dee Dee, and the shape of Lissa’s mouth, so much like her father’s.

Nostalgia turned her heart over. She and her cousin Dee Dee had met Kelsey together at a baseball game the summer she turned fifteen and Dee Dee seventeen. Both girls fell hard for the laughing young man who already studied agriculture in a leading state college; they became a threesome that summer. But two years later, Dee Dee was the girl Kelsey had married.

“I guess I haven’t been a very good adopted aunt,” she said with regret. “I haven’t seen you for so long.”

“Oh, but you send us cool Christmas presents every year,” Aimee reminded. “And birthday checks.”

Meg chuckled. True, she’d scoured the shops every December for just the right gifts. She’d loved these little girls of Kelsey’s and her cousin’s, and the boys, too. She’d indeed felt like a favorite aunt before she moved to New York, and then eventually to England. Suddenly, she realized she’d missed them more than she’d thought.

“I’d planned on coming out to see you one day this week,” she assured them.

Aimee jumped on it. “When?”

“As soon as I make sure my mother is truly all right after her heart attack scare. Kathy,” she said, mentioning her sister-in-law, “is sitting with her this morning. Which reminds me. I’d better go.”

As they swung through the door, a young, dark-eyed boy broke from a knot of youngsters milling on the sidewalk, tugging a little girl behind him.

“There you are, Lissa. Where’ve you been?” he demanded, scarcely giving Meg a glance.

Meg stopped, a tiny disappointment running through her. Eleven-year-old Thad hadn’t recognized her.

But then, why should he? He and his brother, Phillip, nine, had been left home with Kelsey when Dee Dee came with the girls to visit her the last time she was home. Dee Dee had invited her out to the farm to see Kelsey and the boys, but her time had been so short, she hadn’t been able to. She hadn’t seen either of the boys for five years. Or their father.

“Thad,” Lissa complained, “I told you I’d be a little late getting out today.”

“Well, I got Heather like you told me. Now take her.” He shoved the child forward. “She’s yammering for you, anyway.”

“Couldn’t you have waited with her over by the spot where Dad usually parks? I just wanted—”

“Dad’s already here.”

“Already?” Lissa scanned the parking lot, spotted the old truck and groaned. “I wanted to talk with Aunt Meg for a little longer.”

“Well, take Heather, will ya? I have ta see Cort before—” He dashed away.

“Thad!” Lissa protested. “Come back here.”

“Dad’ll wait for a little bit,” insisted Aimee. “We don’t have to go just yet.”

“Where’s Phillip?” Lissa wondered out loud as Thad disappeared around a corner.

“Lissa, I’m hungry,” Heather complained, tugging at her sister’s hand.

“In a little while, Heather,” Lissa said. “We have to find Phillip.”

“I’ll go find him,” Aimee offered on a long-suffering note.

“Can we have McDonald’s today?” Heather asked.

“We might if you ask Dad. But don’t count on it,” Aimee said. “We’re s’posed to go to Linda’s house to eat dinner.”

Meg caught a quick look of disgust pass between the two older girls as Aimee took off after Thad.

“Linda?” she asked Lissa.

“You know. Linda Burroughs.”

Ah, yes. Another of the old crowd, another woman who had once vied for Kelsey’s attention. Now widowed, Linda would be a natural choice for another mate, she supposed, from Kelsey’s viewpoint.

Lissa pulled her little sister forward. “Heather, this is Aunt Meg. Say hello.”

Meg dropped to her haunches. Heather was Dee Dee’s last child, with the same gamin face and great dark eyes as Aimee. As Dee Dee.

Heather was only a toddler the last time Meg had seen her…the last time she’d seen Dee Dee.

“Hello, Heather. I’m Meg, your mother’s cousin.”

“I thought you’re an aunt”

“Not really. Your sisters just call me aunt because I’m so much older than they. But I am family, you know, and I’ve known your sisters and brothers ever since they were babies.”

“Did you know me when I was a baby?”

“No, I’m sorry to say.”

“Why not?”

“I’ve been living over in England for a long time.”

“Oh. Why didn’t you come to see me?” The little girl’s gaze was puzzled and a bit plaintive.

Why hadn’t she returned more than once in five years?

She hadn’t come home for the very reason she hadn’t been ready to see Kelsey again three years before and just moments ago. Not even when Dee Dee died.

She’d been so in love with Kelsey that she’d been on the verge of declaring herself; instead she’d chosen to put half a country and an ocean between them rather than to either embarrass Kelsey and Dee Dee or make a fool of herself. She’d taken a new job with a leading New York investment firm, and from there, to England. She’d hoped to get over him with time.

“Well…I’m here now,” she answered the little girl.

“Hello, Meg,” Kelsey’s deep voice interrupted, sending waves of remembered yearning through her, bridging the years as though they were mere minutes.

Time hadn’t been her friend.

Slowly, Meg stood, noting once again that he topped her by several inches even when she wore heels. Staring up at him, she felt the impact of his gaze like a brick had socked her in the middle. Yet she couldn’t help but notice that the gentle, laughing face she remembered had taken on worry lines and those wonderful mossy eyes appeared tired.

He smiled warmly, showing even white teeth. As always, her heart jumped as though ready to turn somersaults.

“Kelsey…” Her mouth went dry. She tried not to gape at him, tried to return the smile, knew it was tremulous. She was thirty-two, and yet this man could still reduce her to a giddy sixteen-year-old.

“Expected you home when I heard your mother was ill.”

“Yes, I came as quickly as possible.”

“How is she?”

“Much better, thank you.”

“She’s home from the hospital, now, isn’t she?”

“Yes.”

Her mind had taken a coffee break, she supposed, because she could think of little more to say. All the sophistication she’d gained over the years dealing with wealthy investment clients, with dating a variety of men, all her business and social poise, waved bye-bye as it winged past his head.

“Daddy, I’m hungry,” Heather said, wedging herself against her father’s legs. “Can we go for hamburgers?”

“We’ll go in a minute, honey. But we’re due at Mrs. Burroughs’s house at one. Lissa, go round up your brothers.”

“Dad…” Lissa protested.

“Lissa,” he responded in a firm voice.

“Okay.” Lissa threw her a pleading look. “Don’t go away before we can make a plan, will you Aunt Meg?”

“No, honey, I promise,” she told the girl, regaining some of her usual easiness. “Perhaps I can take you girls out to lunch one day next week. Even some shopping.”

“Oh, that would be super. I’ll be right back, okay?”

“I’ll stay right here till we have a day fixed.” She turned back to find that Kelsey was studying her face.

“Been a long time.”

“Yes, it has.”

“You didn’t marry that Frenchman, after all.”

“No. Our lives were too…dissimilar.” Her mother had kept the rumor circuit busy, as always, no matter how tenuous. Henri had been history almost before the proposal.

“What about that English fellow your mom was all excited about a few months back?”

His question was asked seriously, but a glint of amusement made his eyes dance. Her nerves settled down; this was the Kelsey she treasured.

“Clive Mmm, yeah.” She chuckled and shrugged, jiggling her keys. “Actually, I still like Clive quite a lot. Mother certainly wouldn’t mind him for a son-in-law at all, but…”

Aimee and Phillip rounded a corner of the rapidly clearing parking lot, noisily arguing with Thad. Lissa trailed behind.

“Why didn’t you come home for Dee Dee’s funeral, Meg?” Kelsey asked out of the blue, snapping her attention back to his face.

His gaze had grown still.

Why? She’d been vacationing in Italy, thinking about marrying Clive when she’d heard of Dee Dee’s death. Being thousands of miles away, she could never have reached home in time for the funeral.

She hadn’t tried, sent condolences and white roses, Dee Dee’s favorites, and simply grieved on her own for the cousin she’d counted more like a sister.

But she’d said no to Clive, too.

Now she swallowed hard against the lump in her throat, offering simply, “I…couldn’t. I’m sorry, Kels. I loved Dee Dee quite a lot, you know.”

His voice deepened with emotion. “Yeah, I know…”

“Can’t we have hamburgers today, Daddy?” Heather begged again as the other children arrived.

“Not today, Heather,” he replied staunchly, finally dropping his gaze. “Maybe next week.”

“Hi, Thad,” Meg greeted. “Hi, Phillip. Remember me?”

Phillip shook his head, looking curiously puzzled from one to the other as Aimee cozied up to her. Thad simply gave her a suspicious stare.

“It’s Aunt Meg,” Lissa told the boys. “Say hello.”

Thad’s frown deepened. Phillip continued to stare.

“Boys,” Kelsey said in an uncompromising tone. “It’s polite to answer when someone says hello.”

“Hi,” Phillip answered directly while Thad dutifully mumbled a greeting “You’re the lady that likes us. Lissa says—”

“We should go, Dad,” Lissa cut in hurriedly. “You know Mrs. Burroughs wants us to be on time.”

“True enough. Okay, elbows and knees, pile in.”

“Da-a-ad,” Lissa protested his teasing description.

Meg fixed it with the girls to pick them up on Thursday for their outing if her mother’s health continued to improve, and with quick goodbyes, turned to go.

Kelsey’s voice stopped her. “Glad you’re home, Meg,” he said softly, his gaze intently speculative. “Missed you.”

“I missed you…all of you…too.” She stumbled through her reply as her stomach turned to jelly.

Had he missed her? Really as much as all that?

## Chapter Two

“Meg, don’t use that Spode bowl for the corn. Take down the ironstone, the green ivy leaf pattern,” Meg’s mother, Audrey, directed from the living room the following Wednesday night. “Kathy’s kids are just too rambunctious when they help clean up.”

Meg ignored the way her mother always referred to her brother’s children as “Kathy’s kids” instead of her own grandchildren. Audrey Lawrence didn’t quite approve of the girl her son, Jack, had married, even after nearly ten years of marriage, and some of that distaste fell on the children.

Privately, Meg sometimes wondered if her mother would’ve quite approved of anyone her brother might have chosen With Meg, Audrey seemed content enough with the men she dated and was even hopeful over Clive. But then, she’d never really come close to actually marrying one of them, she reminded herself

“At least they help, Mom, and don’t grumble when they do,” Meg remarked as she dutifully took down the ivy leaf bowl and set it on the kitchen counter before taking the stainless flatware into the dining room to finish the table setting. The good silver only came out for special occasions, preferably without children.

“I’d think you’d just be happy to see Andy and Sara at all, since you usually complain Jack and the family don’t come to see you very often.”

“Jack could manage more than he does,” Audrey said with a sniff. “St. Louis isn’t that far ”

“Jack has a busy schedule, Mom,” she said, refraining from mentioning that her brother might come more frequently if their mother were more gracious toward his wife. “He came as fast as he could when you needed him, didn’t he? And Kathy has been wonderful to park Andy and Sara with her mother this last week to come and help take care of you.”

At the moment, Kathy was out getting milk.

“Yes, but it took a heart attack for Jack to make the first trip in three months.”

Meg closed her mouth on the suggestion that her mother could’ve made the three-hour trip to St. Louis just as easily. The truth was, before the heart attack scare, Audrey was so busy with church activities, her women’s clubs and social engagements, she’d scarcely had time for her children They’d teasingly called her the “merry widow” more than once.

“It wasn’t a full-blown heart attack, Mom. You’re lucky that way, because now maybe you’ll pay more attention to taking care of yourself properly.”

“It was real enough!”

Meg hid a sigh. Her mother had always been a hard woman to please, but since her illness, she was more disgruntled than usual.

Even though the doctor had assured Audrey that her attack had been slight, and she was recovering nicely, her mother hadn’t regained her self-confidence in the things she could do.

Meg decided to turn the subject.

“Why don’t you come into the kitchen and supervise icing the cake. Jack and the kids will be here any min—”

Andy and Sara swung through the back screen at that moment, and the phone rang Meg picked up the kitchen extension just as Jack, following the children in, called, “We’re here. Hi, sis.”

She glanced up to smile a welcome at her brother and nearly dropped the phone when she heard Kelsey’s deep voice.

“Sounds like I called at a busy time. Am I interrupting dinner?”

“Oh, Kels.”

Jack looked up, raising his brows. She turned her back on him. He knew her too well, and she didn’t want to risk his reading anything into her expression while her heart pounded into her throat at the very sound of Kelsey’s voice. Her face had always given her away where Kelsey was concerned, anyway.

“No, we haven’t begun yet,” she said.

“Good.” He paused. “About tomorrow…”

Kathy came in with the milk, and joyous shrieks followed when Andy and Sara threw themselves at their mother.

“Hi, munchkins.” Kathy laughed, hugging them close.

“Hmm…a few days absence makes Mommy popular, huh?”

“Definitely does with Daddy,” Jack replied with a wicked grin over his children’s heads, then leaned to kiss his wife.

Meg’s heart always warmed at the love she saw between her brother and his wife, and she even owned up to a bit of envy of it. But now she plugged her ear with a finger against the happy noise.

“I hope my plans with Lissa and Aimee are still on,” she said into the phone.

“Jack,” her mother called from the other room.

“No problem there, Meg,” Kelsey assured. “The girls are so excited, they’ve talked about it all week. They’re trying to make up their minds what to wear.”

“Oh, tell them nothing formal,” she said as Jack landed a kiss on her forehead, leaned into the phone to give a “Hi, Kelsey” before going on his way into the living room. “Shorts, T-shirts and sandals are fine.”

“Okay.” Another pause ensued from his end while a brief knock sounded on the back door.

“May I pop in for just a minute?” Sandy Yoder called through the screen. “I’m not here to stay.”

“Sounds like you’re really busy,” Kelsey said, turning her attention. “Tell old Jack and all hello, and my best to your mother. I’ll, uh…I’ll see you tomorrow, Meg. Bye.”

“Yeah, Kels.” She hung up the phone feeling like Kelsey hadn’t given her the real reason for his call.

The plump woman set a huge cherry pie on the kitchen table. “I just knew you’d have need of a little extra something with Jack and the children in the house for a few days.”

“That’s really nice of you, Mrs. Yoder.” Meg picked up the big ivy leaf platter and dished up the pot roast, her mind only half engaged in what she was doing. What had Kelsey really wanted? “Shall we set a plate for you at the dinner table?”

“Oh, no, dear. I’ve had my supper. Don’t like to eat so late, y’know, and I’m on my way to meet with the church building committee.”

“Why don’t you go on in and say hello to Mom, then,” Meg suggested. The next few minutes bustled by as she made gravy from the pan drippings while Kathy finished getting the other food on the table.

“Well, I’ve got to go,” her mother’s friend said, walking back through the kitchen a few minutes later as Meg filled the iced tea glasses. “The committee is meeting at seven-thirty. Was that Kelsey on the phone a moment ago?”

“Mmm…” Meg answered, concentrating.

“Poor man. He hasn’t been the same since Dee Dee died, y’know,” Mrs. Yoder continued, shaking her head. “Too bad he hasn’t any folks to help with that brood he’s got. They need a mother.”

“I suppose so,” Meg answered automatically.

“He should get on with marrying Linda Burroughs and be done with it. Linda’s good at managing a household, y’know, and she’d put some discipline back into those children.”

Kathy made a quick pass through the kitchen, picked up the bowl of corn and basket of bread rolls, slanted Meg a speaking glance and headed once more for the dining room.

“Oh?” Meg murmured. “I didn’t think they were so badly behaved. Just kids.”

“And Linda’s girl—can’t think of the child’s name—but she’s Lissa’s age. They make a matched pair, I’m thinking.”

Meg had forgotten that Linda had a girl Lissa’s age, and she wondered why Lissa hadn’t bothered to mention it on Sunday. If she and the girl were friends, wouldn’t she have said so? But Lissa hadn’t appeared at all eager to go to the Burroughs’s house, Meg thought.

“I hear you’re taking Lissa and Aimee for a day out tomorrow.”

“Yes, I am.” Now how did Sandy Yoder hear that? From her mother, no doubt.

“That’s very sweet of you, Meg. I’m sure Kelsey will appreciate it as much as the girls. But do you…well, do you honestly think it the best thing? You came home to take care of your mother, after all, and you’ve been home only a week.”

Meg almost laughed aloud at both the sweet patronizing and the gentle reproof. Her mother’s friend meant well, but she still thought of Meg as a youngster who needed a guiding hand. Meg guessed that in the face of her mother’s illness, Sandy Yoder thought she should be the one to offer it.

“Thanks for worrying about Mom, Mrs. Yoder.” She went back to stir the bubbling gravy, then turned off the stove. “But Kathy and Jack are staying till Saturday. Mom won’t miss me tomorrow.”

“Well, if you really think so, I suppose. But Meg, dear, don’t let yourself get too, y’know…involved with Kelsey Jamison. He…well, he’s the kind of man who’s totally self-involved, if you know what I mean. And that farm of his needs so much—”

“Mrs. Yoder…” Meg drew a long breath to keep her temper from rising like the simmering gravy. Her thought of Sandy Yoder being sweet in giving her unsolicited advice just burned to a crisp. The woman wasn’t sweet at all, Meg decided—she was just an old-fashioned busybody.

“Sis, we’re ready.” Jack stuck his head around the old-fashioned swinging kitchen door and threw an unrepentant, pointed grin toward Mrs. Yoder. “Are you?”

“Yes. Yes. Everything’s done in here,” Meg answered in gratitude; another moment and she’d have been very rude indeed. Everyone accepted Jack’s occasional mild rudeness with a shrug, but if she’d cut the woman short, her mother never would’ve heard the end of it, and then Meg in turn would’ve had to hear about it for days.

“Oh, dear. Well, you run along. I’ll pop in again in a few days.”

“Sure, Mrs. Yoder. See you then.” Meg decided she would be very busy the next time her mother’s friend called in to say hello. It would be the truth, anyway. On Monday she had to make contact with her office in London; she’d left two clients in the air about investments She just hoped Clive had been watching their accounts. And she’d postponed a decision on recommending a resort compound for the Neels, her firm’s oldest client. Also, she’d turned over to Clive a new client, an important European hotel chain that sought investors. Another wanted her services in expanding their holdings, wanting to include a strategic piece of real estate in Hawaii.

At eight-thirty Meg tucked her tired mother into bed, and Jack and Kathy did the same for their children before sneaking off to the front porch swing. By nine-thirty Meg looked at her watch and wondered what to do with herself for the next hour. She was restless. The house was quiet.

She might as well pull out some work; she hadn’t touched her briefcase since arriving home. At the very least she could review that real estate proposal and the report on the financial stability of the firm making the offer.

Instead, she walked into the kitchen and dialed Kelsey.

It rang five times. Six. He wasn’t there, and neither were the children. Seven. No answering machine, even. She chewed her lip with unreasonable disappointment.

But she shouldn’t feel so, she chastised herself. Kelsey was a busy man. He had a life of his own, and his children—

“Hello.”

The receiver was an inch from the disconnect button when she heard his voice. She yanked it back to her ear.

“Kelsey?”

“Yeah?” He sounded preoccupied. Almost short-tempered. Maybe she shouldn’t have called.

“It’s Meg.”

“Meg?” A curious relief entered his tone. “Oh, hello.”

She relaxed “I called because…” Why had she? She couldn’t very well say she’d phoned simply because she wanted to hear his voice. “I’m sorry, Kels, about earlier. About rushing you off the phone.”

“That’s okay, Meg. I understand. Sometimes things are in total chaos here, too. I should’ve picked a better time to call than suppertime, myself.”

“No, you’re welcome to call anytime.” In the background she heard laughter and what sounded like a bleat. “Now it sounds as if you’re the one who’s busy.”

“Not really. We’re out in the barn. Thad and Phillip have a young Hereford bull they’ve been raising for two-year-old class in 4-H this year. Fair’s coming up, and they’re counting their chances at winning the Grand Champion.”

“Oh. Do they really have one?”

“Mmm. They might.”

“Well, I wish them luck. Did the girls raise anything?”

“Lissa didn’t seem to want to do it this year. Aimee has a lamb she’s babying, but I don’t think she’s put her best into the effort. Too impatient, I guess.” His voice suddenly grew quiet.

Too impatient. Like Dee Dee. Quick, vivacious, passionate-about-life Dee Dee.

Nostalgia waved over Meg, and she wondered if Kelsey’s thoughts centered on remembering, too.

It was almost her undoing.

“I guess I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Yeah. I was about to shoo the kids to bed.”

“No, Daddy,” she heard Heather in the background. “I don’t wanna.”

“Lissa,” she heard Kelsey order in a muffled aside. Lissa answered, but Meg couldn’t hear what was said.

“I’m keeping you,” she said apologetically.

“No, it’s okay. I shouldn’t have let them stay out this late, anyway, since tomorrow’s a big day for ‘em. Lissa can get Heather to bed, and the rest of the kids are on their own.”

Meg frowned. It seemed to her that Lissa was doing a lot of mothering. Did Kelsey depend on her too much? Who did Lissa have to turn to?

“Kelsey, was there something else you wanted when you called earlier? I had the feeling you were about to ask me something when we had to end our conversation.”

“Um, as a matter of fact, I wanted to ask a favor.”

“Ask,” she prompted, when she heard the hesitation in his voice. “I can only bite your head off through the phone lines if I don’t like it. Tearing you limb from limb would have to wait for personal contact. And then again, I might just say yes.”

His rich, deep chuckle shot through her like a sugar high. Oh, how she’d missed hearing it. She craved more.

“You’ve taken to biting off heads while out in the big bad world, have you Meg? Like the Queen of Hearts?”

His amusement delighted her. “That’s it. Cross me, buddy, and I’ll send out my black knights. Now what’s the favor?”

She heard his sigh. Kelsey didn’t like to ask for anything, she recalled.

“Would it be possible for you to take Heather with you tomorrow? I know it’s a lot to ask.”

“No, it’s not. I intended the invitation to include Heather, anyway. I’m sorry if I didn’t make myself clear.”

“Great!” The relief in his voice was substantial. “Really great. I have to run up to K. C. to pick up new tractor parts. I’ll take the boys with me, but it’s not the kind of thing the girls—well, you know. Anyway, there’s no need for you to run all the way out here. I’ll drop the girls off on my way, if that’s all right with you?”

“Sure, Kels, that’ll be fine. At ten.”

They said good-night, as longtime friends would, neatly and with the warmth of long association.

She wouldn’t wish for more. No…it would be foolish.

“Boys, stay in the car,” Kelsey instructed as they pulled up in front of the Lawrences’ white two-story house. “We’ll only be a minute.”

Aimee was out of the car before he’d opened his own door, and Lissa quickly followed.

“C’mon, Heather,” Lissa urged.

“I wanna go with Daddy.”

Kelsey held his impatience down. Heather, even though excited to be going on the shopping trip just five minutes before, liked to indulge in possessive streaks. This one had been brewing all morning. He didn’t always know what to do about them; he didn’t remember the other kids acting so dependently. But the other four’d had their mother, too.

“No games this morning, little sprout,” Kelsey said, holding her door wide, insistently. Heather reluctantly unbuckled her seat belt and slid out of the car.

“Why can’t I go with you?”

“You’d be bored in two min—”

Meg stepped out onto the front porch dressed in a black-and-white swingy-skirted outfit that stopped inches above her knees. Kelsey couldn’t help himself. His attention was caught in how attractive her long legs looked—and he looked all the way down her well-shaped calves to her feet, elegantly encased in black sandals, and back up again. The sight of those long limbs hit him squarely in the middle and with a force to equal a tightfisted punch.

It surprised him. A lot.

He yanked his gaze back to her face. Meg’s skirt wasn’t any shorter than most women’s shorts, so it must be the sophisticated combination of garments, he guessed. Meg always did have pretty legs—he just hadn’t imagined those curves would ever cause him such a disturbance.

“All ready?” Meg sang out, aiming her comment toward the girls as she came toward them.

“Oh, yes,” Lissa said, enraptured.

“Uh-huh,” Aimee agreed, already three steps up the drive.

“I wanna go with Daddy,” Heather began again, her eyes tearing.

“Don’t be such a baby,” Lissa said with a long sigh.

“I’m not a baby,” Heather protested, the pooling in her eyes growing by the second. She edged against Kelsey’s leg, locking her knees as though she didn’t plan to budge.

“Heather, we don’t have time for this.” Kelsey held his impatience under a tight lid. He gave in to his youngest child too often, according to Linda, but it was easier sometimes to make life run smoother. “If you don’t want to go with the girls, then just get back into the car. But I don’t want any gripes later. Understand?”

“Troubles?” Meg asked as she came up to them

“Only the usual kind,” he told her in a resigned tone.

“Hmm,” she acknowledged in sympathy.

As Meg crouched down to look into the little girl’s face, her chin-length hair swung forward. Kelsey noticed the honey streaks mingling with the sunny gold and light brown, all shiny like a shampoo ad.

“I’m sorry you don’t want to go with us today, Heather,” Meg said with sincerity. “We’re going to shop and have lunch and shop some more. Who knows, maybe we’ll find the latest Disney video somewhere to bring home.”

Meg glanced up at him, gave him a lightning grin, then pushed a strand of hair behind an ear as she turned back to his youngest child. He thought her actions were designed to lift Heather’s mood. Her smile certainly lightened his own.

“But that’s okay,” Meg continued. “We can pick it out without you.”

Meg rose and turned her back. “C’mon, girls.” She hung an arm around each of the older girls’ shoulders as she steered them toward a late-model brown compact car. “Lissa, I think you’d look fabulous in something green to match your eyes.”

Lissa looked back at him as though to ask, Is it okay to leave Heather? He nodded her on.

Meg captured the exchange, then turned a quizzical gaze his way. The expression smote his conscience; he guessed he did ask too much of his oldest girl. She’d been stuck taking care of Heather for most of the summer.

Meg resumed her escort. “And, Aimee, you’d look darling in one of those denim outfits. The boys, now—What’ll we get the boys?”

Meg tossed her hair and looked at him over her shoulder with a conspiratorial smile. “See you whenever, Kels Don’t expect us early.”

“Bye, Dad,” Lissa barely remembered to say. Aimee didn’t bother to look back at all.

“No-o-o…” Heather cried. “Lissa…don’t leave me.” Heather launched herself forward.

Lissa stopped and turned just in time to catch her little sister. “Dad?”

Her gaze entreated him to do something. Kelsey thrust out his chin in guilt. He’d really been careless to let too much responsibility land on Lissa’s shoulders. She was losing her childhood altogether too soon. “Don’t worry, Lissa. Heather can go with me.”

“I wanna go with Lissa,” Heather protested.

“Does that mean you want to go shopping with us?” Meg asked, emphasizing us so the child would understand who was in charge of the outing.

“Uh-huh.”

“All right. We’d love for you to join us.” Meg tipped her head, engaging the child’s full attention. “But, Heather, this is a grown-up girls day. We’re going to have lots of fun, but not the kind of fun that babies like. So what do you think?”

Heather considered her for a long moment. “I’m not a baby!”

“Oh, I’m so glad to hear that. You had me worried there for a minute. I really didn’t want to leave you behind. Shall we go now?”

The girls scrambled to get into the brown compact Meg gave him a last wave. And a wink.

She’d handled his daughter very well—certainly better than he did sometimes. Linda Burroughs would have advocated a spanking with tight-lipped disapproval.

“Okay, I reckon that’s settled,” Kelsey said, hoping his relief was well hidden. Somehow, though, he expected Meg knew all about it. Her smile was too angelic.

## Chapter Three

“Where are we going, Aunt Meg?” Lissa asked from the adjoining front seat as they left the outskirts of Sedalia. Heather had been remarkably quiet next to Aimee in the back.

“Well, I hear there’s an outlet mall near Odessa now. Ever been there?”

“Uh-uh,” Lissa replied.

“Let’s check it out, then. Okay?”

“Whoopee,” squealed Aimee. “Sydney Burroughs thinks she’s so cool ‘cause she’s been there three times this year.”

The Burroughs family again. Meg wondered just how close Linda and Kelsey had grown. But if they were, why hadn’t Linda taken Lissa and Aimee along with her sometime?

“Some people like shopping a lot more than others,” Meg commented. “It’s like a hobby. And with only two people in the family, they probably have more time for it. Perhaps Sydney and her mom shop because they haven’t much else to do. Did you ever think that maybe Sydney is really lonely without her Dad? I’m sure her mother is.”

“Yeah, but that’s no excuse for Sydney to act so dorky. We lost our mom…” Lissa’s voice held a well of sadness. “That’s just as bad.”

Meg felt her throat clog, and she reached out to pat Lissa’s hand. “Yes…yes, it is. But Sydney has only herself and her mother. The five of you children are so lucky, so blessed—you have each other. And your dad is super special.”

“D’you really think Dad’s special, Aunt Meg?”

Meg glanced at Lissa. Lissa’s bright gaze held hope and a subdued excitement, wiping out the sadness Meg’d heard in her voice a moment before.

“I certainly do.” Meg was so used to hiding behind a friend-ship-only facade where Kelsey was concerned that the words came naturally. “Why, we’ve been friends for eons, and I missed both your parents a whole bunch when I moved abroad.”

That was the unvarnished truth Meg had missed both Dee Dee and Kelsey like crazy, yet she’d missed Kelsey more. Much, much more. But she’d never confessed her deepest feelings to anyone but God, trusting Him to help her through her heartbreak, and in those first months alone in a foreign country she’d done so regularly. Slowly, she’d felt better knowing she’d made the right choice in leaving her hometown. Leaving behind a love she could never see fulfilled.

Yet even while content that she’d done what she must, the idea of never seeing Kelsey again, even as a friend, had left a hole in her the size of the Grand Canyon. She’d filled that hole with long hours of study and hard work. Her business success had been very rewarding. Still, it had taken her a long time not to yearn after Kelsey daily.

After all this time she felt as though she might be suffering a setback. A huge one. She was in the strange position of comforting Kelsey’s children, and she found the exercise satisfying. Very happily satisfying.

“Anyway, I suspect your friend Sydney is very lonely being an only child,” she told the girls.

“Yeah, and Sydney was really jealous last Christmas when we got your package from England, Aunt Meg,” Aimee said with a touch of glee

Meg cleared her throat of the laughter that threatened. “Aimee, I don’t think we’re aiming to put Sydney’s nose out of joint, are we?”

“I guess not. It’s just that I get tired of Sydney being a pest about how much she gets to do,” Aimee said with a sigh. “Shopping, movies, doing stuff in Kansas City. The lake, too. Her uncle owns a place and invites them down all the time.”

“Well, after today, you can tell her you’ve been to the shopping mall, as well,” Meg remarked by way of consolation.

“What’s a nose out of—that word—what do you mean?” Heather asked, at last indicating she didn’t plan to sulk all day. Thank goodness, Meg thought.

“Oh, it’s just an old expression my grandmother used to use.” Meg glanced into the rearview mirror at the back seat, but all she could see was the top of the child’s curly hair. “Heather, did you know your mom and I had the same grandmother?”

“You did?”

“Yep. Grandma Hicks. She and Grandpa had a farm, too, when I was little. Dee Dee and I loved visiting her. She always made us laugh.”

During the rest of the drive, Meg told the girls stories about Dee Dee and herself at their age, painting pictures of their mother and other family members long gone. They shopped until very late before driving home, happily tired.

A field of black walnut trees came almost to the edge of the long gravel drive to the farmhouse. Meg recalled that Kelsey had planted them the year Lissa was born, claiming they’d help to pay for college one day. Soybeans occupied the opposite field.

They passed the once-white weathered barn before they reached the old cottage-style house in a small, grassy clearing. Separate garages lined up in the rear, having been built at different times and connected by a roofed enclosure which held the lawn tractor and other tools.

Two dogs ran up barking, as Meg shut off the engine.

“Hush, Charlie Brown,” Lissa instructed what appeared to be a mixed breed as she got out of the car, scolding and pushing the brown nose away. The small golden spaniel investigated Meg’s door.

At the commotion, Thad and Phillip spilled out of the house with Kelsey right behind them.

“Daddy,” Heather called. “See my new sneakers? And I got Sunday shoes, too.”

“Phillip. Thad. Wait till you see what we brought you,” Aimee crowed. “Royal’s shirts and caps. Aunt Meg spent a fortune.”

Lissa gathered two big shopping bags from the back seat. “I’ll take these in and be right back, Aunt Meg.”

“All right, hon.”

Following Aimee into the house, Lissa called, “Heather, come on and put your stuff away right now and change out your new things. I don’t want to see them all stained.”

“Meg, tell me you didn’t!” Kelsey both laughed and protested as he hung an arm over the half-opened driver’s door. “You’ll spoil them for sure.”

“Occasional spoiling won’t hurt them, Kels. Besides, I think the girls were long overdue for a little shopping spree.” She didn’t mention how awed Lissa and Aimee had been at her letting them pick out a whole outfit apiece, including shoes and under things, or that she’d bought Lissa a few cosmetics.

“Well, I hope you didn’t deplete your savings.”

“Hardly.” She smiled into his green eyes and wanted to melt. “And I loved every minute of it.”

“Generous as always.” He straightened, bringing the door completely open, and dropped into a falsely aggrieved tone. “Get out and come in, ma’am. We fellahs cooked up a mess of beans and hot dogs out in the backyard while you girls have been rompin’ through the stores. We’re hot and starved, waitin’ for our women folk to wander on home.”

Meg climbed out, laughing, and matched his tone. “You mean you men folk’ve been slavin’ all day while we was out galavantin’?”

“You got the picture, lady,” he said, in a mock growl. “You’ll stay, won’t you?”

“Please, Aunt Meg,” Lissa urged, returning to the car for the last shopping bag. Then in a near whisper, she said, “I need to talk to you, anyway.”

Kelsey raised a brow at his oldest daughter. “Seems to me you girls have had Meg to yourselves all day. Aren’t you all talked out?”

“But, Dad, that’s different. I wanted. oh, never mind.”

As Lissa turned away, Meg noted the shy mixture of emotions shining from her lowered eyes, her lashes blinking as though to keep sudden tears at bay.

“What is it, Lissa?”

“I just wanted a chance to talk to you alone, Aunt Meg. You know, girl talk. Not kid talk.”

Hadn’t there been anyone at all for the child to share her feelings with? A woman with whom she felt comfortable? Meg remembered all too well her own emotional roller-coaster adolescence and imagined Lissa was facing the usual uncertainties. Without a mother

Meg glanced at Kelsey and caught an expression of arrested curiosity, a glimmer of pain and guilt. And a touch of helplessness.

It was a different side of Kelsey, she’d never seen him helpless before. He glanced her way, drew a deep breath and held it, his lips pursed, before saying low, “Stay…please.”

Meg’s heartstrings definitely felt a tug. More than one, actually, and more like sharp little jerks. “I think we can manage that. Let me call Mom and Kathy and see how things are at home, all right?”

“Super. I’ll be back in a sec, okay, Aunt Meg?”

“Sure, honey. Take your time.”

Kelsey watched Lissa walk away, his eyes thoughtful. “Are you sure you want to, Meg? Get more involved, I mean. My youngsters are a demanding lot.”

“Girl talk is a favorite indulgence for the females of the species, don’t you remember, Kels?” she said, making light of the situation. “I don’t mind.”

“All right. At least you’ve been warned. Now come on round back.”

Meg had been to the small farmhouse many times, but it seemed a lifetime ago now—when Dee Dee had been a part of it all. The old house had taken on a personality of its own, she decided, and lost some of Dee Dee’s precise touch Children’s clutter decorated the tiny front porch and straggly ivy and begonias peeked from a huge overgrown pot on the step. Beyond the screen door, she spotted the edge of a TV set crowding the opened living room door.

Kelsey, however, guided her to the backyard. An old charcoal grill smoked gently near the weathered picnic table under the oak tree, the smell of wieners and beans permeated the air.

The back screen opened and all five kids ran out.

“Dad, Thad’s hogging the last of the dill pickles,” Aimee complained “Make him share ”

“I called ‘em the other day.” Thad hugged a jar close against his chest.

“That’s enough, Thad. Put the pickles on the table and get the cordless phone for Meg.”

“Dad, that’s not fair. I called—”

“No arguments tonight, and do as I asked. We have a guest,” Kelsey reminded.

Thad opened his mouth to protest; at his Dad’s expression, he changed his mind. But not before he sent Meg a silent glance of resentment. It hurt just a little. Meg wondered what she’d done to trouble the boy. But how could he be upset with her when they barely knew each other?

Maybe that was it; she’d made a fuss over the girls but not the boys. Something she’d have to remedy

Meg made her call and relaxed when Kathy told her that Audrey had a couple of friends visiting and assured her she wasn’t needed at home Audrey, though a little petulant, accepted her explanation, and Meg promised to look in on her mother before retiring

The children urged her to the barn to see the 4-H projects.

Meg oohed over the boys’ bull, Fred, and listened to all his finer points and did the same for the girls’ sheep, Betsy Ross, dutifully patting and admiring.

“I’ll be the first to admit I don’t know much about farm animals,” Meg said for Kelsey’s ears only as they trooped back to the house.

Kelsey chuckled. “And you actually admit to such shame after growing up in America’s heartland?”

“Well, I have only a cat. Besides, I’m a town girl. I didn’t grow up with farm animals if you recall.”

Meg’s father had been an unassuming man content to be a small-town lawyer, never expanding his practice beyond himself and one clerk But when he died just after she’d graduated college, he surprisingly left her mother well enough provided for, and she and her brother Jack each had a small nest egg for their futures.

“What of those visits to your grandparents’ farm you and Dee Dee used to talk about? They had animals, surely. And all those state fairs you attended with Dee Dee and me, visiting the animal exhibits? I seem to remember you loved the fair.”

“Oh, I did. It was one of summer’s highlights. But then, it would be, in a small town, wouldn’t it?”

“Big-city girl now, huh? Only a cat?”

“Umm-hmm. Jasper. The only four-legged animal in my life.”

“Well, back then, you sure made the rounds of the animal pens and sat through endless hours of judging as if you knew a thing or two.”

“Fooled you, didn’t we?”

“We?”

“Dee Dee and I only sat through all that to please you. We really liked the carnival rides best. And the lop-eared rabbits. They always resembled story book creatures from Winnie the Pooh.”

“You insult me, Meggie! How could you lead me on so?”

Meg couldn’t help it She giggled as though she were Lissa’s age.

“It was easy You were always so excited about everything to do with farming and working the land. The newest animal breeds, the newest machinery, the latest methods.”

“Now wait a minute. Didn’t you even like the homemaking stuff? The cooking and sewing and all that? You won something or other one year, didn’t you?”

Meg grinned. “You got me there. Yes, I did get a blue ribbon for my fudge. Grandma Hicks’s recipe. But I haven’t made it in years ”

“The big city has ruined you!” he said in mock horror.

“That’s right. I’ve forgotten any rural connections I once might’ve yearned for.”

“Poor baby!” He threw an arm around her shoulders, hugging her to his side in a display of fondness she’d long missed. Funny…no other man had ever affected her the way Kelsey did. She loved his banter, felt young and appreciated under his bigbrother attitude. Yet she’d always hungered to know what his lips felt like in a lover’s embrace.

“Did you hear that, kids?” he called as they reached the back porch, letting his arm drop. “Aunt Meg is suffering from malnutrition.”

“What’s that?” Heather asked, piling chips on her plate.

“It’s starving till you die,” replied Phillip, already munching on a hot dog. “Dad, can we get the marshmallows?”

“Lissa’s getting them,” said Aimee, handing Meg a paper plate filled with a hot dog and beans. “C’mon, Aunt Meg. After we eat, we’ll teach you how to roast marshmallows on the grill.”

“Starving? Didn’t anybody feed you supper before?” Heather asked, her feathery brows drawn with perplexity.

“Your Dad’s just teasing, honey. I’ve been taking care of myself perfectly well.” Meg slid onto the picnic bench, and Kelsey followed.

“Uh-huh,” Kelsey said with a snort as he squirted mustard from a squeeze bottle onto her wiener before doing his own. “Taking care of yourself? All you’ve had for nurturing are tall buildings, harsh concrete and high fashion with nothing to keep you company but that dry, lifeless stuff of crunching numbers. You’ve been deprived of your roots, Meggie. How have you survived without a little earthy visit now and again to feel alive?”

“Oh…I’ve managed.” She bit into her dog. More than managed, if he only knew. She had a side to her that he’d never known.

True, Meg had missed considerably Missouri’s rolling hills, Ozark Mountains, the rivers and easy accessibility to green open spaces, but she’d discovered in herself a rare talent for growing a different kind of crop than what Kelsey produced. Money. Lots of it. Heaps of it.

As she silently munched, listening to the children’s exchanges, observing Kelsey’s gentle rule over the table, she thought about her career. It did surprise her.…

Meg had a gift for investment banking. She understood it, the industry talked to her. Her ability to recognize good—even fabulous—investments could only have come from the good Lord, Himself, she thought, because she seemed to be the only one in her family to have it. Jack, following their father’s lead, had gone into law, but rather than settle for a small-town existence, he’d taken his degree into the St. Louis corporate world. He did fine for himself and his family, but Meg knew her brother wasn’t into making a fortune.

No one knew just how large her own investment portfolio and bank accounts had grown, either. It wasn’t something her family discussed as a rule, other than her mother occasionally asking if she was making ends meet all right. Meg hadn’t flaunted her ability, Clive knew, but only because they worked so closely together

But as for a connection with the land, the kind her grandparents had known, and as Kelsey did…no, that hadn’t been her path. It might have been if Kelsey—

Meg drew a sharp breath and let it out slowly. It was time to go home! Spending time with Kelsey and the kids was making her loopy. Wonderful and miserable at the same tume.

Meg stared at the children, now shuffling for a space around the charcoal embers, with marshmallows stuck onto the long ends of their sticks. It would be so easy to become too attached to them. To suffer heartbreak all over again when she had to leave.

“Lissa,” she said suddenly, “why don’t you walk me to the car. I really need to get going.”

“Sure, Aunt Meg.”

“So soon?” Kelsey said. “I’d hoped we could talk after the kids went to bed.”

“Some other time, Kelsey. I promised I’d be home to tuck Mom in.”

“Of course.” Did she detect real disappointment in her refusal to stay longer?

“Well, thanks,” he said. “Thanks for spending the day hauling my daughters around—and for all the clothes and things. Kids?”

Five young voices made a chorus of various responses.

“You’re very welcome. We did have fun, didn’t we, girls?” Meg said, smiling. “We shall do it again sometime.”

She said good-night, and Lissa fell into step as they walked to her car. The fourteen-year-old was quiet.

“Was there something in particular you wanted to discuss with me, Lissa?”

“No, not really…”

“Mmm…”

“It’s just that I don’t have anyone to talk to about grown-up stuff.”

The night sounds had begun; crickets chirped and mosquitos buzzed. A soft breeze whispered through the oaks by the house.

“There’s always your Dad.”

“Yeah, I know. But sometimes he’s too busy and he doesn’t…well, he tries, but—”

“A girl needs another woman, I suppose Is that it?”

“Uh-huh. But not just any woman! Once he suggested I should talk to Sydney’s mom, can you imagine?”

Meg hesitated a moment before answering. If Kelsey were thinking of Linda in those terms, it wouldn’t help matters if she fostered more dissatisfaction in the girls. “Lissa, I don’t remember Linda Burroughs very well. What is it you don’t like about her?”

“Only everything!”

“Oh-oh. That bad, huh?”

“Yeah. She criticizes all the time and thinks she knows all about how I feel when she doesn’t. And she thinks I should wear the same kind of dorky clothes Sydney wears I couldn’t stand it if Dad got, you know, seriously serious about her ”

“Well, perhaps you should tell your dad how you feel about Linda.”

“I ‘spose so, but it’s hard to find time without the other kids around. And sometimes Dad’s just not in the mood, you know? Then there’s always so much to do! I mean—” Lissa bit her lip. “I’m sorry, Aunt Meg. I don’t mean to complain so much, but—”

Meg made a shocked sound. “Oh, my, my, my! Here I thought I’d met the perfect teenager.”

Lissa erupted in the desired giggles, and Meg joined her.

“I’m serious, Aunt Meg.”

“It’s all right, Lissa. I’m not kidding, either. No one expects you to be perfect. Even though I thought you were when you were little.”

“Maybe that’s why I’m so glad you’re home. I always remember good times with you. And Mom and Dad always talked about you with lots of love and stuff—you know?”

“Yeah…” Meg’s heart turned over She remembered, all right.

“So, Aunt Meg, I was wondering if—that is, Aimee and I talked it over, and we thought maybe you might be tired of—of living on your own?”

“What do you mean, on my own?”

“Well, maybe you’ve come home to stay?”

“Oh, I don’t know about that, Lissa. I have a great job that I like very much, and I don’t think my mother will need me after a few weeks. I’d just get in her way and make her nervous.”

“Not that. I mean. .Aimee and I thought…we’d hoped—”

Lissa stood very still and held her breath, a peculiar expression fluttering over her face.

“Lissa? What is it, hon?”

“Aunt Meg, would you marry my dad?”

## Chapter Four

Meg sucked in air, wondering if the fragrance of the honeysuckle vines resting against the old board fence next to her car could cause hallucinations. Surely she hadn’t heard right.

“Um, Lissa…”

“Please, Aunt Meg, just listen. Please? I’m seriously serious.”

“Well, I—” She swallowed hard.

“You said you like Daddy, didn’t you? You did say it! You think he’s really special, remember?”

“Yes, I do think he’s special, and yes, I like him very much.” Meg’s heart raced at the vast understatement. If only Lissa knew…“But, Lissa, there’s a lot more to marriage than merely liking each other.”

“But that’s a start, isn’t it? Dad likes you, too. He was all excited when he found out you were coming home. I could tell.”

Kelsey excited about her homecoming? Her mouth went dry as her mind whirled with the thought.

“And you like us kids, don’t you?” Lissa nudged.

“Oh, I do…yes, indeed I do. But Lissa—” Her mind tumbled over what to say. “I think Thad and Phillip might not return the regard. And Heather…”

“Don’t worry about Thad and Phillip, Aunt Meg. They’ll love you just as much as Aimee and I do, once they get to know you better.”

Aimee skidded to a stop in front of them, out of breath and flushed. “Did you ask her?”

“Aimee! What are you doing here?” Lissa questioned in an urgent whisper. “I told you to keep the rest of the family busy. Where’s Dad?”

“Keep your shorts on, will ya?” Aimee hissed back. “The boys went to the barn, and Dad said he had some calls to make. Heather’s playing with her new doll we bought today. That’ll keep her busy till bedtime. Anyway, how about it, Aunt Meg?”

Meg studied the eager young faces in the growing dusk. She had the silliest feeling of wanting to laugh and cry at the same time, remembering her own earnestness at their age. But sometimes a girl of a certain age could be just as earnest about something completely different a week later. “You girls can’t be, um—”

“Uh-huh, yes, we are. Majorly serious,” Aimee insisted.

“You don’t want to marry anybody else, do you?” Lissa asked in a suddenly alarmed tone. “I mean, Aunt Audrey said you were dating that English guy, but—”

“Well, no. No, I don’t plan on marrying anyone.”

“Whew! I thought for a minute—” Lissa sighed.

“Well?” Aimee pushed. “What do you think? Isn’t it a great idea?”

“I don’t think you know what you’re asking,” Meg began slowly, staving off hysterical laughter with gritty determination. “You can’t just ask someone to marry your dad out of the blue. He has to do that for himself.”

“But we want you to be our new mother, Aunt Meg,” Aimee pleaded. “And it isn’t out of the blue. We’ve been thinking about it for a long time. You were Mom’s best friend and she wouldn’t mind. Honestly. And Dad needs you, too.”

“Aunt Meg doesn’t think the boys like her,” Lissa said.

“But they just don’t know you very well, not like we do. And I know Heather can be a pain sometimes.” Aimee made a face, admitting, “She’s spoiled.”

Then Aimee’s face brightened, her brown eyes glimmered with a new thought. “That should tell you how much we all need you, Aunt Meg. You can unspoil Heather for us. And if you marry Dad, you can move back to Missouri! You want to, don’t you?”

Meg nearly gurgled her laughter. “I’m not so sure about that one.”

“Aunt Meg, you’re absolutely, positively the only right woman to marry Dad,” Lissa said in a no-nonsense tone. “Please, please, just think about it.”

“Why do you say that, Lissa? What makes you think I’d make your dad a good wife? And mother for you all?”

“Because Aimee and I prayed for you, don’t you see? The minute we heard you were coming home, we went to The Boss. We asked Him for you. I mean…Aimee and I don’t want that Linda Burroughs, for heaven’s sake. If Dad married her, everybody would be seriously miserable.” She tucked in her chin and shook her head. “I mean seriously miserable.”

“Your dad might not think so” Meg suddenly felt exhausted. Her emotions had run amok all day and in the last few moments they’d been through hoops. She didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

She had to consider that Kelsey might be in love with Linda. Though he hadn’t said anything or even hinted at it. But then why would he? And when would he have had time?

“Dad doesn’t want her either, really,” Lissa assured. “It’s just that she keeps calling him and stuff like that.”

“Besides,” Aimee airily enthused, “now you’re home, there’s no reason for him to go out with her anymore.”

From the house’s open windows she heard a telephone ring. Insistently. Where was Kelsey? He’d gone inside to make calls, Aimee had said. Yet no one answered, and although Meg couldn’t hear what the answering machine said, she heard the low murmur of Kelsey’s recorded voice.

Her nerves went on overload. Perhaps one of his calls was to Linda Just maybe he’d waited for her to leave to speak to the woman who was now in his life.

“I really have to go, girls.” Opening the car door, she slid into the seat. “My mother will be in a tizzy if I’m not there soon.”

“You’ll think about it, won’t you, Aunt Meg?” Lissa begged.

“Please?” asked Aimee.

“Umm…” was all she could manage. How could she not think about Lissa and Aimee’s wild, improbable proposal?

Think? Or dream? And wonder what Kelsey wanted, or who?

Meg made her escape quickly, feeling if she remained one minute longer she’d be signed on the dotted line of a marriage contract—even a motherhood contract—before she could breathe out the words I love you.

She just wished Kelsey’s daughters weren’t so completely charming. Her enchantment with the kids only added to the fanciful possibilities her overworked longings had already created. Never mind the drawback of needing to win over the boys; it wouldn’t keep her dreams from soaring.

Sleep? Not much of it tonight, Meg suspected.

As the compact’s taillights disappeared down the drive, Kelsey remained still as a statue near the dark living room window. He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, hadn’t intended to horn in on his daughters’ adolescent desire to talk with a mother figure.

He just hadn’t figured on his children asking Meg to be their mother.

He felt caught between sheer dumb shock and the need for bellyaching laughter. He’d had no idea his children wanted another woman in their lives so much. But not just any woman, he reminded himself. Meg.

He did know they didn’t much care for Linda, though. But how had they become so desperate about it all?

Had he been so casual in accepting Linda’s invitations that he hadn’t given the entire matter his proper attention? He’d only thought of Linda as another lonely adult looking beyond their children for occasional company. He’d never felt romantic toward Linda, never indicated he had anything but friendship on his mind. The question of marriage had never come up. Or even hinted at, from his end of things.

His two oldest children astonished him. Imagine, suggesting to Meg…! Telling her not only of their own need, but his. Asking…

And then he did imagine. Meg!

His Meg, cousin by marriage, pretty and sweet-tempered in a way that was seldom seen in this day and age. Yet a nineties woman for all that, smartly intelligent, efficient and seemingly tireless.

It hit him somewhere between his heart and his gut.

How impossible was it? His kids needed a mother, all right, all five of them. A full-time ever-present big-hearted woman. Who better than Meg? Meg, whom he knew, liked—even loved as a friend.

He wouldn’t give a thought to how badly he needed a wife. Someone to offer warmth and love. Some nights—Well, it was just as well he didn’t dwell on how empty he sometimes felt, how lonely his bed. But he wasn’t about to marry just anyone in order to fill it.

As needy as his body sometimes felt, Kelsey couldn’t bring himself to engage in a casual affair, either. He didn’t want to, couldn’t think of making love in a careless, meaningless fashion with someone who meant little to him—something he’d be ashamed for his kids to know.

But Meg Lawrence wasn’t just anybody. She was…

Well, she was Meg!

Kelsey made a turn around the darkened room before finally lowering himself into the big chair. He leaned his head back, his thoughts and emotions in a swirl.

Dee Dee had been the love of his youth, and he wasn’t ready to leave her memory behind yet. Or ever.

Besides that, any woman who came into his life would have to realize he was already on overflow as he tried to balance his and his children’s lives right now. Who—what woman in her right mind—would want to marry him with five little rowdies to curtail?

And what would she get out of it? His affection? He wasn’t sure, other than his own physical needs, if he had any love left to offer a woman.

But Meg would know all that without any explanation, his heart murmured. She had been so much a part of them all those first years. Asking Meg to marry him would be like asking a part of himself to come home.

Stunned at that sudden thought, he rose to pace the room once more. The children’s voices drifted to him through the open windows; he should call them in to bed. Instead, he leaned on the window sash and listened to the night sounds, wondering about the new thoughts and growing excitement noting through his system.

Slow down, he told himself. Just because Lissa and Aimee want it to happen doesn’t mean it will. Or should.

He had to think about this logically. Why would Meg even consider giving up her career? A highly successful one, according to Audrey Lawrence. If Audrey could be entirely believed, Meg was the star player in her firm. Audrey exaggerated sometimes, but still—

Could he ask Meg to give that up? Where would he find the unmitigated gall?

He circled the room again, picking up and putting down an industry magazine on raising beef cattle, finally turned on the corner lamp over his computer, knowing he had to update his files, stared at the pile of unfolded laundry on the couch and once more listened to the distant voices of his children. He should urge them to bed soon.

Yet he couldn’t bring himself to rob them of all their childhood; he’d let them stay up a little longer and sleep late tomorrow. Even though he couldn’t

He’d have to leave Lissa in charge again while he worked. He’d tried part-time housekeepers, which was all he could afford. At the beginning of the summer he’d let go of the last one.

Yes, and the house showed constant neglect, with the laundry always behind, and too many meals of hot dogs, macaroni and cheese, and frozen pizza. And Lissa and Aimee had less freedom to be teens all the time. Though he thought he could hold off his worry about Aimee a little while longer, Lissa already talked of the school’s homecoming dance this fall, and he hadn’t a clue how to parent a girl child who’d reached the age of raging hormones and daily temptations.

Furthermore the house needed a coat of paint, his south fence should’ve been replaced last year, and Thad had barely passed fifth grade math. He hadn’t the time to coach him no matter how he stretched his day. Phillip…he felt decidedly guilty about his second son; Phillip was so quiet most of the time he was scarcely noticed. That couldn’t be good.

The children cried out for a mother. He wanted a wife.

The more Kelsey tried to shake the idea of asking Meg to marry him, to come and make harmony from his chaotic days, to share with him the raising of his needful children, the more the idea mushroomed.

And he knew he’d likely get little rest until he had an answer from Meg.

He finally rang the back door cowbell, three shakes, signaling the kids that it was bedtime, and set his mind to catch up with his accounting before midnight.

But he knew he was going to do it. Ask Meg.

Lord, where do I find the courage? he prayed.

He laughed, suddenly, a little harshly. Why he even bothered the Lord, Kelsey didn’t know. God had better things to do than to listen to Kelsey’s grumbles or hopes and desires. He’d found that out a long time ago. He’d have to figure out where to find courage on his own.

But where?

On Saturday, Jack, Kathy and their kids left. Meg had enjoyed their company, enjoyed her brother’s banter and her sister-in-law’s practical approach to Audrey’s sometimes unreasonable demands, but she understood their need to return home.

Audrey saved her obvious relief at their leaving until the last goodbye had been waved.

“How wonderful to have a little peace and quiet restored,” she uttered, sinking into her favorite wing chair. “I just don’t know how much longer I could have stood the daily racket.”

“Now, Mom, you said yourself you enjoyed teaching Sara and Andy how to play those simple piano songs. And you liked having Jack hovering about.”

“Yes, but children are so tiring nonetheless.”

Meg grinned at her mother as she fluffed up a cross-stitched pillow. “And you thrive on telling them stories of when you were their age, and about Jack and me.”

“I suppose. But they’re so hard on my antiques.”

“Think of it as giving your furniture more character,” Meg teased, picking up a dust cloth. “Three generations on Grandma Hicks’s dining chairs becoming four.”

“Sara did show a remarkable interest in my old china, didn’t she? And the cut glass bowls from Aunt Katherine.”

“Yep.” Meg held one of her mother’s favorite china figurines up to the light, dusting it lightly. She’d seen dozens of collections in England and had added to her mother’s each Christmas. “You might just have found your next heir to the family treasures, Mom.”

“I guess I should think about it.” Audrey rose and gazed tenderly at the things in her curio cabinet. “What with my weak heart, I should think about a will, too. To decide what Sara might want and little Andrew. I don’t suppose you’ll ever have children now.”

A quick sharp jab invaded Meg’s dreamy state. Why couldn’t she? Thirty-two wasn’t too old.

Thirty-two. How long was she going to wait before putting that dream forever on the shelf? If she’d wanted only a child, she could’ve married Clive.

She’d been steadfastly refusing to think about the discussion with Lissa and Aimee the whole morning. Refusing to want what they’d offered. Or rather, overriding the surge of hope it gave her. It wasn’t…wise…to entertain such hope. Her heart might prove to be more fragile than her mother’s.

Meg carefully replaced all the figurines in the curio cabinet, closed the door, folded the dust cloth and turned her teasing back on high.

“Weak heart, phooey Dr Collins says you’re stronger than you know, if you’ll only give up the invalid act. You just need to eat properly and get more exercise.”

“Oh, Dr. Collins. He doesn’t know everything,” Audrey said with a sniff. She pointed to a figurine on a corner table. “Don’t miss that one, Meg.”

“Don’t avoid the issue, Mom.”

“Oh, exercise.” Her mother dismissed the thought with a wave of her hand. “I can’t imagine myself joining one of those public gym clubs.”

“Well, think of joining the walking club, then. I hear there’s a group of older people from the various churches that make the half-mile circle around the downtown shops every morning,” she said, reminding her mother of the growing popularity of the activity. “Then they have morning coffee together.

“Some of those people even make the round four or five times. Paul Lumbar—” Meg casually threw in the name of the handsome older man all the single church women over fifty had been buzzing about lately “—mentioned it the other day when he called.”

“Mmm…Well, yes, it was nice of Paul to call. Perhaps I might give it some thought when I regain my strength.”

“You do that, Mom.” Meg changed the subject. “I have to go into town and find a fax machine to send Clive some information before tomorrow. Can I call Sandy to come spend the afternoon with you?”

“I suppose. I might even enjoy a little quiet bridge game if the circumstances were right.”

A smile caught up with Meg. If her mother wanted to play bridge, she couldn’t deny her own improvement any longer.

“I’ll call Sandy before I change clothes,” Meg told her mother as she sailed from the room. “I’ll leave it to her to call whomever else you want.”

In old downtown twenty minutes later, Meg found a small store front that listed “Computer, Postal and Office Assistance” on the door just below the name “Justine’s,” and parked in the curb-front parking. A moment later she stood at the counter waiting for the pretty brunette, the only clerk in sight, to finish her phone conversation, and glanced about. Two copy machines, three computer booths, a counter holding a fax machine and weighing equipment, all drastically contrasted with the high ceilinged, brick-walled old building.

“Can I help?” The brunette broke into a welcoming smile. “Oh, Meg! I heard you were home. How are you?”

“Fine, Justine. When I saw the name on your door, I just knew the business had to be yours You’re the only Justine in town.”

They’d been classmates from the first grade, although never more than casual friends. Still, Meg enjoyed renewing the friendship every time she was home. “So when did you open?”

“A couple of years back, after my youngest entered first grade. Since Dad owned the building, but couldn’t keep paying tenants for long, I decided to give my idea a try. Don’t make much here in the old part of town, but—” she shrugged and laughed “—it keeps me off the streets. And I fill a few business needs.”

“That’s great, Justine. You’re just the person I need.”

“You mean you came in for something besides to say hello?”

“You bet. I’ve got several faxes to send, and—” Meg glanced at the computer booths. A nearby sign gave a list of services and prices, including the hourly charge for computer use. “You wouldn’t by any chance be on the web, would you?”

Justine raised her eyebrows in mock insult. “Sure am, missy. No backward little town or lack of the latest equipment for us.”

“Wonderful Terrific. Where do I plunk my money?” Meg responded, laughing.

At Justine’s invitation, Meg moved behind the front counter and sent her faxes. Then she inspected the computer booths, screened to give privacy, and decided on which one she would use.

As usual whenever she immersed herself in whatever was happening around the banking and investment world, Meg was lost to her surroundings for long moments of time. An occasional bell, signaling a customer, or a ringing phone didn’t even register with Meg for the following hour. Finally, though, three noisy kids made their presence felt and Meg looked up.

“Sorry, Meg,” Justine said apologetically. “My kid, Mark, and his buddies usually hit me two or three afternoons a week for the computer games. At least I know where they are, you know? And summer hours are hard to fill.”

“It’s okay, Justine. I’m about to wrap up here, anyway, and I imagine Mom is wondering where I’ve got to.”

Meg hit the Print keys on something she wanted to save and stacked papers back into her briefcase neatly while waiting for the printout.

The door swung wide, and she heard Justine greet someone, then move to one of the copy machines. Meg collected her printout and walked from behind the booth.

Fashionably dressed in a blue summer suit, Linda Burroughs stood on the customer side of the counter. She didn’t look as though she’d gained a pound over a size eight, and her blond hair was highlighted perfectly

“Why if it isn’t our globe-hopping traveler,” Linda said. “My, my, Meg, you do look wonderful ”

“Doesn’t she, though?” Justine chimed

“Thanks, Linda.” She could kick herself for wearing her old cutoff jeans she’d found in the back of her closet. She hadn’t taken time to change as she’d wanted to do “You, too.”

“Kelsey’s children were full of you being back home when they came to dinner the other day. They could hardly talk of anything else.”

Meg smiled, murmuring, “Lissa and Aimee remember me from the old days.”

“So Kelsey said,” Linda commented a little dryly. Her dark blue eyes studied Meg with curiosity. “You’ve been home for a couple of weeks, now, haven’t you? I heard your mother is doing just fine.

“She is, and thank you for asking ”

“From what Kelsey tells me, Meg, you have a very demanding job. When do you go back?”

“Oh, I left my return open,” Meg answered smoothly. Small towns always wanted to know everything; they thought of themselves as extended family, entitled to the truth about everyone. “I didn’t know how long Mom would need me.”

“And your boss is okay with that? My, my, aren’t you lucky? I couldn’t leave my real estate business for so long without a substantial loss.”

“Yes, I am lucky. But thank goodness I’ve discovered Justine’s business. She’s a find.” Meg searched the bottom of her purse for her wallet, then pulled out her credit card. “I’ve arranged to use her computers part-time for the rest of my stay.”

“Ah, yes,” Linda agreed as she accepted her copy work from Justine and collected her purse from the counter. “This girl keeps us all in the nineties. She sometimes saves my hide, actually. Like today when our copy machine is on the blink.”

“Please, please You’ll have me blushing,” Justine protested with a preen. “And I plan on taking you all into the next millennium. Maybe I should take my bow now.”

They chuckled at Justine’s sally before Linda said, “Well, good to see you, Meg I imagine you’re eager to get back to England soon. Hope I see you again before you leave I’ll tell Kelsey I ran into you when I see him tonight.”

Linda breezed out of the door without looking back, her proprietary air floating behind her.

Kelsey and Linda had a date tonight? Startled, Meg simply murmured, “You do that.”

“Hmm,” Justine said, gazing at the retreating woman with a puzzled frown. “It’s a little like saying ‘here’s your hat, what’s your hurry’ isn’t it? Didn’t you hang out a lot with Kelsey and Dee Dee a long time ago?”

Meg drew a deep breath. Whatever had possessed her to even think of the possibilities of marrying Kelsey? Or that he might want her when Linda was available? The girls were simply living in a dream.

“Yes. We were all close, once,” she answered slowly

Stuffing her wallet back in her purse, she handed over her credit card

“How much do I owe you, Justine?” she asked, willing the other woman to hurry the transaction. She had to leave before she gave away her crumbling heart How foolish of her to once again pin her hopes in a childish dream Lissa and Aimee were entitled to their dreams However, she was a grown woman. She knew the difference between dreams and reality.

Kelsey, of all people, did as well. She could only hope the girls hadn’t mentioned their idea to their dad

## Chapter Five

The two unknown cars in the drive told Meg her mother’s bridge game was most likely still in progress. But who of Audrey’s friends owned that cherry red fifties Ford Thunderbird?

Meg glanced at her watch. Four-thirty. Surely they couldn’t mean to stay much longer. Perhaps she could hurry her mother’s friends out with a mention that Audrey’s strength wasn’t up for marathons yet. She really didn’t relish the idea of making polite conversation.

All the way home she’d had Kelsey on her mind, but there seemed no way around what Linda had implied; Linda wanted everyone to think she and Kelsey were a set. And in spite of what the girls had said or wanted to believe, Meg thought things might be rather serious between Kelsey and Linda.

Well, why not? Why wouldn’t Kelsey have moved on to a new love after Dee Dee died? Meg’d been gone from her hometown for a long time Long enough not to know exactly whom Kelsey might be interested in anymore But her heart sank with the thought of it being supercilious Linda Burroughs.

Oh, my! That was small-minded of her. She sounded as bad as Lissa and Aimee. And to even fret over it meant she’d allowed too much hope from the girls’ proposal into her thinking.

Meg let the screen door slap shut behind her as she entered the kitchen with her arms full of groceries and her thoughts swirling. How could she have let herself in for this kind of hurt all over again? Her heart shrank a little more with each passing moment, until she thought it no bigger than a lemon.

“Meg, is that you?” Audrey called, out of the murmuring voices from the living room, as Meg stepped through the back door. “What kept you? I thought you’d be back long before now.”

“Yes, Mom, it’s me.” Meg set her bag of groceries down on the kitchen counter. Spotting several of her mother’s best iced tea goblets beside the fridge, she wondered about how much bother Audrey had gone to in entertaining the bridge set. Probably, though, Sandy Yoder had taken care of serving the tea and cookies. “We needed a few things from the grocery store, and I picked up the cleaning.”

“Well, come along in, dear. I’d like you to meet someone.”

“Be right there, Mom.” The phone rang. Automatically Meg lifted the kitchen extension. “Hello.”

“Meg?”

Her heart lurched into her ribs as she recognized the low voice. Maybe it hadn’t shrunk so much after all.

“Hi, Kelsey.” She made a huge effort at keeping her tone casual.

“Hi.” Hesitation followed.

“Everything all right with the kids?”

“Yeah. They’re fine. In fact, I wanted to thank you again for all the clothes and stuff you bought ‘em. The girls have preened over them every day since you took them shopping.”

“You don’t object to the makeup for Lissa, do you?”

“Uh, well, yes and no.” Humor laced his voice. “I guess I’m a typical daddy. If you’d asked me beforehand, I would’ve said she’s way too young yet. But then, since I know you wouldn’t have bought it if that were true, I guess I have to face the fact that she’s no longer Heather’s age.”

“Well, get your boots out, Kels. Lissa will be knee-deep in boys before another year passes.”

“That’s what scares the daylights out of me.” He paused, and Meg could hear him breathe for a moment She wasn’t used to an uncertain Kelsey, and her senses sharpened. What was it? “Meg, I’m in town and I thought maybe—”

“Who is it, Meg?” Audrey called. “Can’t you hurry it along?”

He was in town before meeting Linda, Meg assumed. Linda had said—strongly implied, anyway—they had a date tonight. Yet he’d called her. Something was on his mind. She put her hand over the receiver and called, “I’ll be there in a sec, Mom.”

A sudden girlish giggle trilled out from the living room, followed by a masculine chuckle. She turned toward the sound, wondering who was there besides the usual card-playing crowd.

“I’m sorry,” Kelsey murmured. “Have I called at a bad time again?”

“Not for me, Kelsey.” Never “But Mom’s bridge group is here, so I suspect she needs me to fetch something for her. I just came in five minutes ago from errands and things.”

“Oh.” He honestly sounded disappointed. “Ah, that’s good, then. I mean that she’s up to that much excitement. Audrey must be feeling more herself.”

“Yes, she is.” What had he been about to say? “She’s even considering taking up walking for exercise.”

“I hear walking is great. And she won’t need you around much longer.” A sudden lighthearted note entered his voice. Now why would he be especially happy about that?

“No, I suppose not.” But while the thought seemed to brighten his outlook, it suddenly depressed her more than she would have imagined. If her mother no longer needed her, there went her excuse to delay her return to England. And until that moment she hadn’t realized she’d wanted one.

“Meg—” Her mother stood in the kitchen door frame.

“Be right there, Mom. Sorry, Kels, but—”

“It’s all right, Meg, I heard. You need to go. Just tell me something.”

“Uh-huh?”

“Can you meet me for coffee at Betty Jean’s Café before church in the morning? I can drop off the kids early for Sunday school and there’s something…um, ah, a matter I’d really like to discuss with you.”

“Sure, Kelsey. What—oh, never mind. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She hung up the phone and headed toward the living room, ready with a smile for her mother’s friends. To her surprise, Sandy Yoder, Ginny Hames and Babs Dunning acknowledged her presence with all the eagerness one might a piece of used furniture. Instead, their attention focused on the tall slender man who rose with old-fashioned politeness, pushing his glasses onto the top of his thick gray hair.

“Meg,” her mother spoke with a gentle warmth in her voice, “I’d like you to meet Paul Lumbar.”

So this was the new man in town who was currently turning all the over-fifty feminine heads. “Hello.” She offered her hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice meeting you at last, Meg. Your mother speaks of you so often.” He proved to be as charming as rumor had claimed, Meg thought thirty minutes later as she saw the collected company out. And he’d invited them to dinner after church the next day. Her mother had accepted for both of them before Meg could make an excuse.

“Mom, are you sure you’re up to a long day tomorrow?” Meg asked as she carried the remains of the snack tray back to the kitchen. “Church and dinner out?”

“Oh, I think I’ll be all right. Especially if I have an early night tonight.”

“Okay, just checking. But don’t plan on doing anything else afterward but coming right back home.”

“All right, dear. Just as you say. Now I think I’ll rest a bit before supper if you don’t mind.”

Meg turned to stare after her mother. What was in that charm potion Paul dished out, anyway? Audrey had been all sweetness and light the whole afternoon.

At ten minutes to ten, Clive called, catching Meg just after she’d finished her shower. Her mother had dutifully gone to bed at around nine.

“Clive, what are you doing calling on a Saturday night?” she said as she pushed her wet hair from her face. “It must be—” she glanced at the clock on her bedside table “—nearly five in the morning there. Sunday. Is there an emergency?”

“It’s lovely to hear your voice, too, Meg, luv.” Clive’s teasing chuckle rippled over the line “No, it’s not an emergency. Why can’t I call you on a Saturday night? You weren’t planning to be out, were you?”

“No, but you usually are. I’m surprised you’re still awake, but I am glad to hear from you. I don’t suppose you went into the office today—er, yesterday—did you? I faxed you with some thoughts on the Half Moon connection.”

“Well, as it happens, I’m not up before dawn. I’m not even in London. I’m still in the Virgin Islands.”

“You are?” She sat on the bed and reached for her comb. “I thought you planned to fly home yesterday.”

“I did, but I changed my mind. Thought I might fly to New York to have a meeting with Lansing and Jonas.” He mentioned another of their clients. “Just wanted to touch base with you before morning.”

“I see.” She plumped another pillow behind her back. “What’s wrong, Clive? Isn’t Serenity as nice as the photos?” She spoke of the private resort property on an outer island that Clive had gone to investigate for the Neels Corporation, one of their oldest clients. She’d planned make the trip a month ago before her mother’s illness had sprung up.

“Nothing like that, Meg. The place is even lovelier, though it’s a little overpriced and needs a bit of updating.”

“No hidden swamps, sink holes, big-time hotels falling over the property line or anything?”

“No, that isn’t it.” He laughed at her penchant for looking for the worst possible feature of a location before working up to the best. “Serenity passes muster on all the check points. Flowers, sun and sea from all sides, just as promised.”

He launched into a discussion of the finer points of the conference resort he and Meg were recommending to the Neels corporation. “The only problem is the place is really too large for their needs at present and Lazarus Neels is jumpy about the price being over their heads. You know how he hates long-term debt”

“Old Lazarus putting on the breaks, is he?”

“A bit. Wish you’d talk to him, Meg. He seems to listen more closely to the positives when you do the presenting.”

“Did you remind him of the climb their company has made over the past three years?”

“Yes. And his daughter Jane did, too. She’s excited about buying Serenity and sees all the possibilities. But the old man remains overcautious. I tell you, Meg, if we don’t wrap this baby up in the next month, Lazarus will back out of the buy altogether.”

“But if they continue to go forward at their current rate, they’ll grow into it within the next three to five years without breaking a sweat. In which case, they’ll be very grateful to us for finding it for them.”

“I know, I know. Said all that. Sounds better coming from you.”

“Hmm. Perhaps we could suggest offering something to ease him into it.”

“Like what?”

“Like a time share for the first five years.”

“You’re kidding.”

Meg didn’t answer as she thought rapidly, tapping a pencil against a discarded magazine.

“You are kidding, aren’t you Meg? He’d never go for it. Times shares…” He sounded as though she’d said something disreputable with a nasty smell to it.

“Not the old kind where a corporation holds the strings, Clive. I’m thinking of time shares with another company—one, or at most, two other companies Neels would retain control over the property.”

“Something more like a lease?”

“Something in between, I think. If we find someone Lazarus respects, someone reliable, of course, with whom he’ll be comfortable. A mid-sized company, though smaller than Neels, would do it. It would give Neels all the right buttons. Prestige and all that.”

A long silence followed. “Just might work. Jane understands the potential of owning Serenity,” Clive enthused. “The idea of having their own conference and training center located where there’s sun, sand and water in a continually warm climate makes her feel they’ll have something, a place for learning and for holidays to entice their employees and clients alike to stay loyal to them.”

“Her instincts are right. Overall, a good choice I should think,” Meg agreed.

“But we have to convince the old man…”

Meg sighed. “All right. Will a phone call do it?”

“It may. But Lazarus plans to be in New York for the Lansing and Jonas meeting, and I thought—You know he likes you, Meg. Thinks you’re a ‘fine piece of womanhood.’”

“That old flirt,” Meg responded with a laugh. Then she pursed her mouth in thought while her usual excitement rose. This had been her package from the beginning, and she wanted to see it through. The best part of any deal was tracking it to a successful conclusion. Besides, it was unfair to put the Neels off any longer, or Clive, for that matter. He had his own accounts to see to.

Clive was still talking. “And since your mother is so much better, I’d hoped you might fly in for a face-to-face. It would only take a couple of days, Meg. I’m convinced you’re the one to cinch the deal.”

Meg rolled off her bed, reaching for a pad of paper from the side table, already thinking of a company in the north of England that might be interested in joining Neels in an island venture “Well, give me a day to make some arrangements here, okay? I’ll call you when I know I’ll be coming.”

Meg hung up, wondering how her mother would react to her leaving for a few days after promising her a whole month. Perhaps Sandy or one of her mother’s other friends would spend a few days with Audrey while she was gone. Two days should do it. Three at the most.

But there was a larger problem looming than what a mere two days could cover, and Meg hadn’t yet given much thought to the answers. She couldn’t stretch her leave of absence from work much longer than the month she’d asked for, yet the idea of leaving her mother to live entirely on her own again concerned her. She and Jack were Audrey’s only living relatives, and neither of them were within easy distance. Besides friends, who would be close by for her mother when she returned to England?

Perhaps it was time they found someone to share her mother’s house or else suggest her mother move in with Jack or Meg. Although Audrey wouldn’t welcome either suggestion, Meg was sure. Audrey loved her independence.

She made a note to talk with Jack and Kathy about the matter and closed her notebook.

But it wasn’t the problems surrounding her mother’s care or the usual excitement of finding all the components necessary to complete a business agreement that crowded her mind as she fell asleep later. No, she had no doubt those solutions would work themselves out with a little extra finesse on her part What made her heart flutter was the knowledge she would see Kelsey again in only a few hours. She wondered why that was still true after all these years, why she hadn’t fallen out of love with him. Or why she’d never found a man to supplant Kelsey’s place in her heart.

But she hadn’t, and that was that. Now she wondered what bothered him, what was on his mind. What did Kelsey need from her?

What if Lissa and Aimee had told him of their proposal?

She sat straight up in bed, wide-eyed, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with—not anxiety. Of course not. She was a grown woman and experienced in worldly attitudes. Such a small thing to cause a tizzy.

Her hands flew to her flushed cheeks, and she jerked them away, then dropped them into her lap.

Oh, what if they had. How mortifying! For her and for Kelsey.

Oh, Father, please, please don’t let either of us be embarrassed in this situation. The girls are so young and they haven’t a clue as to how I’ve felt all these years. Or Kelsey, either. Please, Lord, help me to think clearly in the morning and not hope for the impossible or…anything at all…or make an utter fool of myself.

She lay back down, curled on her side, with the sheet pulled up to her chin. Well, she’d just have to laugh it off. Surely she and Kelsey could share the joke together like the old friends they were.

They didn’t have to let it create a mountain of embarrassment.

Turning over, she punched her pillow. She’d wear her new buttercup yellow dress with the high waistline. It didn’t make her figure look much slimmer, but it went well with her coloring.

No—she’d wear the navy linen. She looked slimmer in it.

By eight the next morning, Meg had settled for a casual soft blue print skirt with a solid blue knit top to match her eyes. Betty Jean’s Café sat on a corner in the old part of town only two blocks from church. It boasted an old-fashioned family menu in a sixties setting Most of its customers came from long habit and loyalty. Meg slipped into the booth opposite Kelsey at exactly the appointed time.

Without his usual straw cowboy hat or his sometimes baseball cap, his gleaming auburn hair lay smoothly brushed against his head. He had dressed in a suit and tie, attire he seldom wore. He had little requirement for it, she knew; few farmers did. Granted, the outdated brown suit and solid green tie could never pass as anything more than very conservative, but he’d dressed up, just the same.

She’d caught him a second before he looked up. His downcast gaze appeared thoughtful, and his mouth had settled into a solemn expression. She blinked, wondering if he planned on going to a funeral

Then he smiled at her, and her heart went on its leapfrog game.

“Morning, Meg.”

“Hi, Kelsey.” She glanced at his almost empty coffee cup. “Have I kept you long?”

“No, not really. Lissa and Aimee needed to be at church early because the junior choir is singing for this morning’s service.”

“Oh, that’s nice.” She owned up to a tiny bite of disappointment. He hadn’t dressed up for her; he planned to attend church to hear his girls sing. “Where are the boys? And Heather?”

He signaled for the waitress to bring coffee. “Heather was invited to Miss Maybelle’s, her Bible teacher, for Sunday morning breakfast along with three other children entering kindergarten next year.”

“Ah, yes. I remember Miss Maybelle. She coached me in every Bible verse-and-fact contest while I was in grade school. I’m amazed at her faithfulness and tenacity.” She chuckled. “And longevity. Does she still own that property to the south of you?”

“Uh-huh. I’ve asked her if she wants to sell it several times, but she isn’t ready to let go of it yet. Been in her family too long. But she lives in town now.” He picked up his spoon, set it down again and glanced away. “The boys had pancakes already and now are riding their bikes in the park. I told them to check in with us in thirty minutes.” He glanced at his watch. “Twenty-five now.”

“With strict instructions not to get dirty before church, too, I bet.”

“You got it. I guess that kind of parenting never changes, does it?”

“No, I suspect not.”

The harried waitress finally came to their table, filled their coffee cups, left containers of fresh cream and rushed away. Kelsey stared after her with impatience. “Did you want something to eat? A donut or something?”

“No. I ate breakfast with Mom before I left.”

“It’s okay to leave her alone now?”

“Yes, she’ll do fine for a short period of time. In spite of her protests to the contrary, she likes her time alone. Anyway, she plans to attend church this morning.”

He nodded and stirred two creams into his cup and two sugars.

“My goodness, Kelsey,” she teased, trying to ease his unusual tension. “If I put all that in my coffee I’d be a butterball in no time at all. I have to watch all my calories as it is.”

“I wouldn’t worry too much about that, if I were you. You look good, Meg. Really good.” His expression remained earnest, though he tried for a smile, as though making fun of his own effort at complimenting her. “Didn’t I mention that the other day?”

“Um, I don’t recall hearing it. Thank you.” He’d paid her a few offhand compliments when they were younger, but she’d always thought them in the nature of a big brother. This was of another kind altogether

“Well, you look very nice this morning. All the time, really.”

She tipped her head and stared at him over her coffee cup.

“Thank you, Kelsey.”

“This is no good” He set his cup down suddenly, letting the liquid slosh over its rim. “If I drink any more of this stuff I’ll be so jittery with caffeine the kids’ll think they have a snapdragon for a dad.”

She laughed, the sound bubbling out of her spontaneously. He joined her, his lips spreading in a genuine smile, while his eyes took on their mossy look.

“What is it, what’s the matter, Kelsey? I’ve never seen you so…jittery. It’s not like you. Can I help?”

“Actually, you can. I mean…” He brushed back the neatly trimmed hair above his left ear, sighed and leaned back. His expression turned determined. “We’ve been friends for a long time, Meg. Good friends, I like to think. I’m just going to shoot straight, okay?”

“Sure, Kels. Fire away.”

“I overheard what Lissa and Aimee said to you the other night. Out on the drive. I’ve been thinking about it. About Linda…”

“Oh.” She swallowed hard and put down her cup, willing the rising blush to abate quickly, or better yet, wishing to hide it altogether. But it was no use, so she rushed into a response. “Oh, Kelsey, I wish—Don’t be angry with the girls. They mean well, you know, and they’ll get used to Linda in time. She’s really a good person, and she’ll make a wonderful effort to…”

She lost her momentum as he staunchly shook his head.

“No. Linda’s a nice woman, Meg, but she’s all wrong for the kids. She has no patience for them, and they don’t get along with her girl. Besides—” he looked at her with a growing realization, a frown puckering his brow “—I’d make her a lousy husband. No real respect between us, you see. While with you—”

“With me?” she squeaked out.

“Meg—” he held her gaze “—why haven’t you married by now?”

“I don’t know.” Clasping her cup hard to keep her hands still, she felt mesmerized with the intimacy of this conversation. “Just never found anyone I wanted to spend the rest of my life with when it came down to the nuts and bolts of a commitment, I guess.”

“Are you ever sorry?”

Dropping her gaze, she hesitated for a long moment.

“Sometimes.”

“Don’t you want to?”

How could she answer that? “Well, I always thought I would. Like most women, I suppose.”

“Would you consider it, Meg? Marrying me?”

Looking up, she could only blink at him, wondering if she’d hear her morning alarm go off at any moment

“The thing is, Meg—” he straightened and reached across the table to pry her fingers from her cup “—I think the girls are on to something. We could make a go at marriage. You and I.”

Meg looked at his callused hand holding hers, his fingers strong and steady, his nails clean and neatly pared. Her own hand trembled.

“The way I see it,” he continued, “we could form a kind of partnership. I haven’t much to give you but myself, but I’d be a faithful husband. And you’d be close to your mom, that’s something to consider.”

“Yes, I’ve been thinking about that,” she murmured absently.

“We have a lot of advantages on our side, Meg—we’ve known each other for years, respect each other. I don’t have to tell you anything about Dee Dee or question the fact you’ll be good to my children. You’re fond of them, and they love you.”

“I’m not sure about the boys. Or Heather.” She made her comment in jest because she didn’t know as yet how else to respond. But for once he answered seriously

“They’ll love you when they know you better. As much as the rest of us do. In God’s own time, you’ll see As you said a moment ago, they’ll adjust to a mother’s hand. And you understand how to handle Heather.” He grinned his old teasing grin. “As Aimee said, she need’s unspoiling. Maybe we all do.”

The boys would love her as much as the rest of them? Did that include him?

Even if it did, that didn’t necessarily mean Kelsey was in love with anyone but Dee Dee’s memory. Could he ever fall in love with another woman?

A sudden rapping on the window beside their booth brought their faces about like puppets, startling them from their concentrated attention on each other. Thad and Phillip. They beckoned eagerly, their muffled voices telling them to come see the old cars driving through town on their way to a car rally.

Meg’s usual sharp mental switches eluded her as she tried to take in what the boys wanted while a long-held breath whooshed from her lungs. Kelsey had just asked her to marry him. She’d heard the very words that had filled her thoughts and fueled her longings for days. Would it be wrong to marry Kelsey for her own selfish desires?

Oh, but she wasn’t kidding herself. He’d never have thought of asking without the kids’ prompting, and he wasn’t offering anything like a romance.

But did that matter? They were two rational adults who looked at life’s practical needs first. Kelsey thought they had a shot at building a good marriage. At a fulfilling, long-lasting relationship based on friendship.

Now it was up to her. Now she had to discover if she had the courage to chance getting her heart broken. Because if she married Kelsey and he never fell in love with her, that’s exactly what would happen

## Chapter Six

The moment Meg stepped into the church foyer where she’d promised to meet her mother, Sandy stood ready, waiting to pounce. Audrey was coming with Babs Dunning.

“Meg, dear, really! You should have a little talk with Aimee.”

“Aimee?” Meg blinked rapidly to bring her cloud-raptured thoughts back to the moment at hand. She’d barely been able to think in a straight line since leaving the café. Stalling, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Why? What’s wrong with Aimee?”

“Why, she’s making outrageous statements which are bound to upset your mother. You should put a stop to it right away.” Sandy pursed her lips. “That’s how rumors get started, y’know.”