He Never Stopped Loving Her

This handsome football coach cannot be little Jonny Turner, Neely Andrews’s best friend’s kid brother. Back in high school, Jonny was nothing but a pest. When family troubles bring Neely back to her hometown, Jon is there to offer friendship and support...and maybe something more. Turns out that Jon has adored her from afar all these years. Neely has to admit he’s become the kind of man who’d make any woman proud. But will a terrible secret from her past scare him off? Or will Jon make her feel free enough to share everything with him?

“Jonny, I can’t believe you remembered that crazy pumpkin top I wore that day, back in high school.”

Her gaping mouth drew into a smile. “I think I blocked that gaudy thing from my memory.”

But he hadn’t. When she’d hoisted the carton of food from the trunk, the sunlight hit her auburn hair and streaked it with gold, the color of leaves at the height of autumn. It had taken his breath away. He’d just turned fourteen, and Neely had become his first secret love.

Neely shook her head as a soft chuckle escaped her. “Why would you remember something like that?”

Talk about reality. The truth smacked him in the head and slipped to his tongue. “Because I had the biggest crush on you.”

Her hand flew up. “What are you saying? You had a crush on me?” She searched his eyes before she burst into a laugh. “You were a pesky kid.”

To her maybe, but to him, he was a man in love....

GAIL GAYMER MARTIN

is an award-winning author, writing women’s fiction, romance and romance suspense with over three million books in print. Gail is the author of twenty-eight worship resource books and Writing the Christian Romance released by Writer’s Digest Books. She is a cofounder of American Christian Fiction Writers, a member of the ACFW Great Lakes Chapter, member of RWA and three RWA chapters.

A former counselor and educator, Gail has enjoyed this career since her first book in 1998. This book is her fiftieth novel. When not writing, she enjoys traveling, speaking at churches and libraries and presenting writing workshops across the country. Music is another love, and she spends many hours involved in singing as a soloist, praise leader and choir member at her church, where she also plays handbells and hand chimes. She sings with one of the finest Christian chorales in Michigan, the Detroit Lutheran Singers. A lifelong resident of Michigan, she lives with her husband, Bob, in the Detroit suburbs. Visit her website at www.gailmartin.com, write to her at P.O. Box 760063, Lathrup Village, MI 48076, or at authorgailmartin@aol.com.

Her Valentine Hero

Gail Gaymer Martin

www.millsandboon.co.uk

“I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord,

“plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future.”

—Jeremiah 29:11

Thanks to writer friend and E.R. doctor Mel Hodde, who provided me with medical information and validated information I’d already collected.

Thanks to Gary Lowry, who read my sports scenes and gave me an A-okay. Again, thanks to my Facebook group, Readers of Gail Gaymer Martin’s Books, for their support, ideas, helpful comments and wonderful reviews. If authors didn’t have readers, what good would a book be? Thanks to my agent, Pam Hopkins, and as always,

my deepest thanks and love to my husband, Bob. Without his support and patience (especially that),

I wouldn’t be the writer I am today.

Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Recipe from Gail's Kitchen

Dear Reader

Questions for Discussion

Excerpt

Chapter One

Neely Andrews forced her legs to keep moving. One more lap and she’d take a break. Her tendency to add pounds to her five foot six frame provided perfect motivation to exercise. But since she’d been back in Ferndale for nearly seven weeks, she hadn’t exercised at all except for running up and down her father’s staircase. In Indianapolis, she’d joined a gym. Now she was worried about her dad’s recovery from a serious heart attack. Fitness had gone out the window, and weight had flown in. Running the high school track wasn’t the answer to her total workout needs, but it was better than nothing.

Although staying in Indianapolis might have been wiser, since she had the lead on another job, she couldn’t ignore her need to be closer to her father and widowed sister. Each time she thought about Ashley’s loss, Neely’s layoff became as unimportant as a lost penny, and though home brought back some darker thoughts, she focused on the brighter memories of friendships and happy times that still made her smile.

Fighting the desire to give her body a rest, Neely steeled herself and pushed forward, her lungs burning. Short of her goal, she nearly tripped over a shoelace splayed at her feet. She came to a stop, propped her hands on her thighs and braced her winded body to catch her breath. When she grasped the lace to retie her shoe, perspiration rolled down her forehead and stung her eyes. She lifted the bottom of her T-shirt and brushed the dampness away.

A wolf whistle jerked her upward, and she dropped the hem of her shirt. Across the field, boys were spilling from the school, wearing shoulder pads and carrying helmets. Two faced her, gawking. She let out a groan. Football practice. Another wolf whistle spurred her to turn away and ignore the silliness. She lowered her eyes to her plump legs, bare beneath a pair of running shorts. Who knew football practice began in August?

Her mind drifted back to the years she’d spent at this high school, but time fogged her mind. Memories of special occasions—some good, some bad—had glided or stumbled through her thoughts once in a while, but football practice hadn’t made an impact. Didn’t matter anyway. After fifteen years, school procedures had probably changed. Everything had changed.

A shrill whistle caught her attention. She looked toward the team and saw a man strutting onto the field. He glanced her way, said something to the boys, and before she could move, he headed in her direction. She focused on her lace. No doubt she would get a lecture from the coach for being on his turf. While she hurried to retie her shoe, his voice reached her. “Ma’am.”

What happened to Ms.? She tilted her head sideways noticing his long stride toward her. His build looked trimmer than a football player’s, but beneath his T-shirt she recognized a solid swell of muscles. His frame would look appropriate on a basketball court.

“Ma’am, would you mind leaving the field?”

What happened to please?

“You’re distracting the boys.”

She what? She straightened, embarrassed at his comment but, more so, irritated. “Sorry, I would have run the track this morning when I drove here earlier, but then I had to fight off the band. Apparently that’s when they practice.” When he drew close enough for to her to see his face, her heart tripped.

His squint grew to a wide-eyed stare. “Whoa! This can’t be Steely Neely?”

She couldn’t believe this good-looking specimen was her friend Rainie’s pesky kid brother. The only person she knew who would call her the concocted name was Jonny Turner. In the past, she would have shot out her typical insult, but “If it isn’t the conehead” faded from her mind. When she looked into his handsome face, she had all she could do to keep her mouth from gaping as widely as his.

“Jonny Turner. You’re kidding me.” She gazed upward at the six-foot-plus hunk of man with the blue eyes she could never forget. Blue like a crystal lake. It had been Jonny’s saving attribute, and she’d told him so years earlier.

“How about Jonathan or Jon.” He grinned, obviously enjoying her startled expression. “Jonny’s long gone.”

“Jon not Jonny? I don’t know.” She gave him a dubious look. “But here’s a deal—only if you drop the ridiculous Steely Neely. It’s stupid.”

“No, it’s accurate.” He sent her a crooked smile. “Even when we were kids, I’d never known a person as determined as you are. You were as strong-willed as steel.”

She rolled her eyes, hoping he got the point, but showing her usual disdain with him was losing the battle.

His grin remained as if he hadn’t noticed her eye-rolls. “Sis told me you were back in town. And I hear you’re her maid of honor.”

Neely managed an agreeable nod, though she was still in a tailspin. Maid of honor seemed a sad title for a thirty-two-year-old woman. Most of her high school friends would expect her to be dubbed the matron of honor by now. But finding Mr. Right hadn’t happened, not since her days with Erik Cross. She cringed. He’d been Mr. Wrong.

Jonny’s eyes brightened. “And if I’m right, maid of honor means you’re still—”

“Right again.” She rolled her eyes for a second time, not happy with the gleam in his. He’d always rebutted her verbal jabs with “you’ll never find a man with that attitude.” He’d been way too accurate.

“What are you doing here?” She waved her hand toward the gawking teens watching them.

“I was going to ask you the same question.” He motioned to the strip of track. “I teach phys ed and coach football and basketball.” This time he rolled his eyes. “That’s obvious, isn’t it? But you again, that’s a different story. Why are you running on my track?”

“It’s a long story.” And not a story she wanted to tell him. The more she looked at him the more tongue-tied she became. “Rainie didn’t mention you were teaching now.” Or that you’d turned into a great-looking man.

“Why would Lorraine talk to you about me?” He chuckled. “Or have you forgotten your lovable animosity?” He shifted to face his gawking team, and blew his whistle.

She pressed her hands over her ears, blocking the shrill assault on her eardrums.

He cupped his hands around his mouth like a megaphone. “Push-ups. Twenty.” He held up both hands, fingers spread and acted out his order. Their groans sounded across the distance.

She lowered her hands. “Can you warn me when you’re going to blow that thing?”

“Sorry.” He dropped the whistle, and it bounced against his chest before hanging in place. His eyes shifted from the team to her. “I need to get back to my boys, but...” He touched her arm. “I wanted to say I’m sorry about your dad. I heard it was a bad one.”

His sincere turn-about caught her off-guard. “It was. Really bad. He lost a lot of his heart function. Now that Mom’s gone I need to keep him healthy.” Watching her dad trudging up and down the stairs for something he’d forgotten wasn’t part of her health plan for him. On the other hand, convincing him to use the guest room on the first floor was. Yet so far her attempt had failed. Maybe that’s where she’d inherited her determination. He stood as firm as a rock. She sighed. “Running the stairs for him is the only exercise I’ve gotten since I came home. That’s why I’m jogging around the track.”

He wrapped his arm around her and gave her shoulder a hug. “Exercise is good.” He squeezed her again before dropping his arm. “We have a new gym in town, Tone and Trim Fitness Center. I go there. You might want to give it a try.”

“Are you telling me I can’t run your track?” She arched a brow, a little irked at his suggestion.

He grinned. “You can run anytime you want except when my boys are on the field. You’re a real distraction.”

His expression caused heat to rise up her neck. “I’ll take your suggestion into advisement.” But a fitness center cost money, and right now she was jobless.

He gave her a wink. “I need to get back to my team. I wish we had more time to talk.” His eyes captured hers, and a tender expression washed over his face. “I can’t believe it’s you.” He took off running backward, his eyes still on her, but when he spun around, he came to a halt.

Neely winced, thinking he might trip with the abrupt stop, but he didn’t, he turned back to her again.

“I’ll be done here in an hour or so. How about coffee or even dinner. Will you join me?”

Ten years ago the idea would have been ludicrous, but at the moment, looking at those eyes had roused her interest even though she still couldn’t accept he was the new improved Jonny. A crazy memory popped into her mind, and she jabbed her fist into her hip. “You poured sand in my hair when I was twelve.”

His jaw dropped before a glint sprang to his eyes. “Accident, or maybe I wanted you to appreciate my new dump truck.” He gave her a wink. “Whichever, I promise I’ll never do it again.”

The wink sent prickles down her arm, and a witty retaliation failed her.

He started his backward walk toward his team. “So what about joining me?”

His easy spirit and charm made her head spin while curiosity got the better of her. “Sounds nice, Jonny. I’m staying at my dad’s. You remember where it is?”

“How could I forget?” His backward jog picked up. “Give me a couple hours. Let’s call it dinner.”

He darted off, and she watched him go, still trying to turn that good-looking man into Rainie’s brother who’d been the bane of her teen years. And if that didn’t confuse her, her heartbeat, flitting like a bird in spring, did.

* * *

Jon strode along the sidewalk beside Neely, amazed that she’d agreed to have dinner with him. When they were growing up, she avoided him every chance she had. But he couldn’t blame her. He was four years younger than she, and obnoxious. Boys who’d just learned about girls and had to deal with the first twitches of testosterone failed to make wise decisions when it came to falling in love. Neely had hung in his mind forever. And today, Neely, the woman, tightened the noose without knowing. He’d thought about her all these years, never suspecting the Lord would bring her back into his life. But here she was.

In his peripheral vision, he drank in her profile, the tilt of her well-shaped nose, the fullness of her lips, the rounded shape of her cheek molding into her defined jaw. His hopes lifted knowing he would see her around town—maybe even back on the track—but he wanted so much more, and most important, he needed to test the waters. “Are you looking forward to seeing Erik at Rainie and Ty’s engagement party?”

Her eyes darkened. “Erik? You mean Erik Cross? Don’t tell me he’s still in town.” A look of panic filled her face.

Though her expression heightened his confidence, it confused him. “Erik joined his dad’s company after college so he’s still in the area.” He studied her, trying to make sense out of what had just happened. Panic didn’t seem appropriate. “Sorry I mentioned him. I didn’t realize you had bad—”

Her distraught look remained. “Maybe you didn’t know—you were so young—but I broke off our relationship.” She shrugged. “He started talking marriage, and I realized I had a whole life in front of me.”

He’d known about her breakup with Erik. Rainie and she had talked about it, and he’d overheard some of their conversations, but Neely had been the one to end it so why did it still hold a sting? Her attitude turned him upside down. It didn’t quite make sense. To him real love meant he would have a whole world in front of him to be with the woman he loved. “You two were a thing back in high school.”

“I know. We broke up just before he left for college.”

Her comment seemed an afterthought, yet he struggled with her strained expression. “Sorry, Neely. I knew you weren’t together because I knew you hadn’t married him. But I didn’t know you had bad feelings.”

She shook her head. “I need to get over it.” She averted her eyes and kicked at a stone on the sidewalk. “Where is this restaurant, anyway?”

“Right up ahead.” He pointed to the purple-and-green-striped awning a block away. “It’s called Pronto.” He slipped his hand to her shoulder, wanting to ease her edginess. “Can we forget my earlier reference and cheer up?”

She tilted her head toward him. “I am cheery, but I’m not happy to hear Erik’s coming to the party. Why was he invited?”

“He’s a friend of Ty’s.”

She drew up her shoulders. “I’ll just steer clear of him. I’m not in the mood for auld lang syne.” Her lips curved to a faint grin. “You know what I mean?”

He agreed, but he really didn’t know what she meant unless her reference hinted at Erik’s problem. Cheating on his wife had ended Erik’s marriage. Maybe it ended Neely’s relationship with him, too.

They walked the rest of the way in silence, and he was grateful when they’d reached the restaurant. He opened the door, wishing he could start their visit again. “How about over there?” He motioned to the empty table.

She nodded and followed his direction without comment, and once seated, she studied the menu while he studied her. Being with Neely seemed like a dream. Years ago he’d been Rainie’s brother. Today he’d become an equal. At least an equal in his mind. “Does having dinner with me seem strange?” He lowered his menu to the table.

Her head jerked upward as color tinted her face. “You must have read my mind.”

He wished he could. “No, but I’m a good guesser.”

A grin flickered on her lips. “I’m trying to acclimate myself to the situation. If it weren’t for your gorgeous eyes, I’d think you were an imposter.”

Her resolute gaze nearly caused his undoing. “I hope that’s a compliment.”

“It is.” She turned her attention to the menu.

Aware that he’d reaped a compliment from Steely Neely sent his pulse racing. But then reality brought it to a halt. A compliment was only that. He wanted so much more. “Rainie said you’re home to stay.”

She inched her head upward as if in thought. “Not sure about the ‘to stay’ part, but right now I’m home without other plans. I was laid off from Zigman’s, and with the economy so bad, I read the writing on the wall. The layoff would be permanent.”

“You didn’t read the writing well enough, I’m afraid.” He hated being the bearer of bad news, but she needed to know.

She tilted her head as if puzzled.

“Michigan’s economy is rotten, too.”

“I know. It’s the pits.” Her face shadowed. “It doesn’t matter, I guess. I really came back for Dad and my sister. It’s been tough for Ashley.”

Those feelings were ones he understood. “Losing a husband with a newborn baby is something I can’t even wrap my mind around.” Neely’s expression deepened his sadness.

“Jonny.” She gave his arm a pat. “Thanks for caring.”

Her hand didn’t move, and the warmth radiated to his chest. He looked into her eyes, wishing he could resolve her problems for her.

Something seemed to distract her, and she sat a moment in silence. Finally her face brightened. “Enough about me. Tell me about you.”

“What do you want to know?”

“I don’t remember your being involved in sports. What made you go into coaching?”

He picked up on her evasion. Talking about him got her off the hook. “Remember what you said. You were older than I was so you probably wouldn’t have known what I enjoyed.” He twisted the knife a bit. He could play the age game, too.

“I’m not that old.” She arched a brow.

He arched his back. “And I’m not that young.”

Her face broke into a full smile. “You got me.” She rested her cheek on her fist and studied him.

“And I remember a lot of things about you...even at my very young age.” He gave the knife another playful thrust.

She didn’t flinch. “Go on. You’ve captured my interest. What do you remember?” She leaned closer and grasped his hand. “This is fun, Jonny.”

Fun for her, but serious for him. He wasn’t that boy any longer, not by a long shot. He was a man—a football coach with respect from his team and the community—not an irritating kid. And he wanted her to know it. “How about calling me Jon?”

She drew back, releasing his hand. “Jon? That sounds weird.” She shook her head. “I’ll work on it. That’s all I can promise.”

Wishing he hadn’t jumped at her, he managed a smile. “That’s good enough.” He grasped the menu, and raked his eyes over the choices, needing time to get his thoughts together.

The tension faded from her face. “No matter what I call you, you’ll always be Jonny to me.” She rested her hand on his again. “And no more digs.”

Relief. He nodded, but his attention had shot to the touch of her hand. Heat from her fingers swam up his arm and into his chest. “Sounds good to me.”

Her gaze drifted to the tabletop a moment as a fresh frown sneaked to her lips.

“Neely?”

Her head jerked up, and it took a minute for her eyes to clear. “One more question, and I even hate to ask it.”

His pulse skipped as he waited.

She looked away. “This is about Erik.”

He figured.

“I’d feel better knowing he’s married. He is, isn’t he?”

Jon’s chest constricted, but the truth needed to be heard. “He was married but not anymore. Erik’s divorced.”

Her frown deepened. “Divorced?”

He nodded, and slipped his hand from beneath hers to grasp the menu. “We’d better order. I have some errands to run tonight.” He could have told her the truth about Erik, but he avoided anything that reeked of gossip, and he saw in her eyes she wanted details.

Neely glanced at her watch before she perused the menu, though her questioning gaze flashed toward him more than once.

He didn’t bite. “I’m ready to order. Are you? They have a great Mediterranean platter—grilled chicken, peppers, hummus, orzo or how about Chicken Quesadillas?”

She lowered her eyes to the menu, then closed it, but he could see food wasn’t on her mind. Erik was, and she longed to dig deeper. If she learned any more, it wouldn’t be from him. He had no interest in discussing Erik’s dirty laundry. None at all. His attention remained on her—the girl he’d always sensed was his soul mate.

Chapter Two

Neely stood in the bridal salon dressing room, her gaze on the icy-green silk chiffon fabric shirred at the bodice and falling in soft draping to her feet. She craned over her shoulder to look in the mirror at the back of the gown. In the past week, she’d lost a couple pounds, but that didn’t make a dent in where she wanted to be. Running the track at the school had become a problem between the football team and the band. By the time football season was over, she’d have to run in snow.

She gave another glance at the gown from behind, pleased that her additional pounds didn’t show from that view. Jonny had mentioned the new fitness center, and if it weren’t for the money, she would rush over and sign up, but first she wanted to see what she could manage on her own. So far, she’d pretty much failed.

“Can I come in?” Rainie’s voice swept in from behind the curtain.

“Sure.” She turned to face the doorway. None of her friends in Indianapolis knew her as well as Rainie. “I love the dress. You made a great choice.” She raised her arms at her side, and swished the skirt with a sway. “What do you think?”

Rainie pressed her hand to her heart. “It’s gorgeous, and you look amazing.” She motioned for her to twirl around.

Neely did as she asked, feeling the soft fabric brush against her legs. She hadn’t been in a gown since the senior prom when Erik was at her side. The breakup occurred during the summer before college. She hadn’t planned it. It just happened despite her guilt. The image that clung in her mind was his persistence for getting her in his bed. Prove your love. His words still rang in her head. She’d been strong until her senior year when they were preparing for college. He would head for an Ivy League university and she, to a nearby community college for two years. She’d thought giving in would keep him faithful, but she’d been wrong. He’d cheated on her anyway.

Coming home and hearing Erik’s name had dredged up the bad feelings and her guilt. Now she had to work at disposing of them and forgiving herself for her pitiful decision. One thing she’d learned about maturing. Strength and wisdom came with age and experience. At least it had for her, all except one thing. Though she knew the Lord forgave her for her mistake, she hadn’t forgiven herself. But that was years ago, and now she’d learned even more about herself and about men in general. She had her fill of them. Nothing would make her change her—

“Hell-o.”

The singsong greeting jarred her thoughts. She gave Rainie a guilty smile. “I was on a little time travel.”

Rainie tilted her head. “Any place interesting?”

“Not really.” She didn’t want to get into her mental mess even if Rainie was her best friend and her confidant. Her intimate relationship with Erik was the one thing she’d never shared.

“Come on. What were you thinking?”

Her friend’s persistence could drive her loco. “High school. The prom.” She ran her hands along the soft fabric. “That’s the last time I wore a formal.”

Rainie’s grin sank. “You and Erik.” She shook her head. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to bring that up, but then that should be water over the dam as they say.” Her grin returned.

“Lots of water.” She managed to grin back. “Jonny told me Erik’s divorced.”

“Right. He is.” Her eyes widened. “When did you see Jon?”

Neely’s pulse skipped. “You call him Jon, too.”

“What else? Now that he’s six foot two and built like an athlete, Jonny doesn’t fit him.” She curled up her nose. “Don’t you think?”

“I suppose, but he’ll always be Jonny to me.” Her chest tingled, and the reaction jarred her. She pushed the feeling away and gazed down at the gown.

Rainie nodded. “I’m so glad you like the choice. Do you think the bridesmaids will?”

Neely ran her hand down the bodice of the silky fabric. “What’s not to like? I think it will flatter most figures.”

“I thought so, too.”

She turned toward Rainie. “Why didn’t you tell me what a great-looking guy Jonny turned out to be?” Another sensation trilled along her skin, like a wisp of hair she tried to brush from her face but could never find.

Her eyes widened. “He’s my brother. Why would I tell you about his looks? I don’t think about it.” She drew back. “Anyway you always called him a pest and ignored him, so why would I mention him?”

Jonny had said the same, and she still didn’t have an answer that made sense. Rather than trying to sort it out, she eyed herself in the mirror again. “I can take the gown off, can’t I? We both love the style.” She turned her back to Rainie, and motioned her to unzip the dress.

When she stepped out of it, Rainie hung it on the hanger and then faced her. “The bridesmaid dresses are just like yours except they’ll be a deeper shade of spring green.”

“Sounds pretty.” Neely stepped into her jeans and pulled them up.

Rainie eyed her a moment. “You still didn’t answer my question about Jon. When did you see—”

Neely waved her words away. “On the high school track.” As she dressed, she gave her a short summary, anxious to change the topic.

“And you had dinner?” Rainie’s eyebrows touched her hairline. “That’s interesting.”

Her expression roused Neely’s curiosity. “Why?”

“I think you’re the first girl he’s taken to dinner in a long time.”

She waited for more, but Rainie just looked at her. “Doesn’t he date?”

“A guy that good-looking would, but he never seemed to get serious about any of them until a year or so ago, and then I expected to hear wedding bells.”

Her chest constricted, picturing Jonny with a wife.

“He dated Jeannie longer than anyone else.”

Neely drew air into her depleted lungs. “Jeannie? Anyone I’d know?”

“I suppose you do. Jeannie Hunt.”

“Jeannie Hunt?” The question shot out of her like a bark. “The cutesy little cheerleader from the tenth grade?”

“The same.”

That knocked the wind out of her. Now that she thought about it, Jonny hadn’t told her anything about himself when they’d talked. She faced the mirror again, eyeing her dark hair, a face that could be lost in a crowd, and a figure that she hid beneath loose fitting apparel like her jogging pants. Jeannie had been a petite blond with curves in the right places and a face that could have been on a Barbie doll. She spun around again. “What happened between them?”

Rainie shrugged. “I don’t know. He stopped talking about her, and when I asked, he just blew it off.” Rainie slid the curtain aside, and stepped into the alteration room as if the subject had ended.

Neely’s mind was stuck with the image of Jonny and the Barbie doll.

Rainie spun around. “Before we leave, would you like a peek at my wedding dress?”

Though her thoughts lingered on other things, she couldn’t ignore Rainie’s excitement. “I’d love to see it.”

Rainie darted away, and as she vanished through the doorway, Neely kept fixating on Jonny. He’d grown into a hunk—a really nice hunk—but what did that have to do with her? No way could she turn her relationship with him into a romance no matter how good-looking or sweet he’d become.

When Rainie returned, Neely slammed the door on her pondering. Seeing her friend’s glinting eyes made her focus on the moment. A saleswoman appeared behind her, carrying the wedding dress.

Neely’s heart stood still. The soft white gown floated in the woman’s arms, organza flanges and tulle swirls of fabric skirt sweeping into a cathedral train. “You’ll be the most beautiful bride in the world.”

Tears flooded Rainie’s eyes, and she wrapped her arm around her friend’s shoulders. “One day I’ll be your matron of honor, and then it will be your turn to be the most beautiful bride in the world.”

The idea warmed her, and she closed her eyes, envisioning her father—healthy and happy—walking her down the aisle. Ahead of her, she gazed at the groom, his eyes tethered to hers, and her heart stopped. She drew in an urgent breath.

“Neely, what’s wrong?”

She gathered her wits. “Nothing. I only hope my dad is still alive to see that day.”

“Oh, sweetie.” Rainie folder her into an embrace, but Neely struggled to clear her mind of the vision she had seen beside the altar. It was Jonny’s spectacular blue eyes that drew her down the aisle.

* * *

Jon peddled faster, his thoughts keeping up with the bike’s speed. Exercise provided therapeutic release to his struggling emotions. He’d always prayed Neely would come back in his life now that age and success were on his side. But he never expected the Lord to answer his far-fetched request.

He gripped the metallic bar, and in a moment eyed his pulse rate. Excellent. He upped the resistance and dug in to the pedals giving the bike another five minutes to deepen the burn. The old motto, no pain no gain, flashed through his thoughts but not nearly as often as Neely’s image. Since he’d talked with her, his emotions roller-coastered through his chest until he wanted to rip up the tracks.

With her back in Ferndale his hope rose again. Maybe her return was part of God’s plan. Knowing Erik was out of the picture cheered him, too. Now he needed to spend time with her so she could know Jon Turner the man, not Jonny Turner the boy who hung out in the shadows and tripped her up with his attempts to watch her every move. He ran errands for her and Rainie just to spend time with Neely.

In his early twenties, he finally understood what about her mesmerized him. First, she was pretty, like sunshine on dew. He cringed at the poetic thought, but that’s what she was like—fresh and open to newness. Even when she put him down, her smile softened the blow, and it felt more playful than serious. And sometimes he had deserved it.

But it wasn’t her good looks that interested him. Lots of girls were pretty. Neely showed a depth of spirit that captured him. He admired her determination and her self-reliance. Most of all her generosity. She’d demonstrated the same trait by leaving her life in Indianapolis to come home to her family who needed her.

Slowing the pedals, he let his muscles cool as his mind reverted back to his plan. Somehow he had to get her back into his life. If she bought a gym membership, he could see her here. If not, maybe the church could be their connection. Or maybe a charitable activity. Even as a teenager, Neely involved herself in more charity events than he could count. The idea sent his pulse surging far beyond what registered on the heart rate monitor. He grinned as he slowed, and then stopped. Now to put his plan to work.

While he showered and slipped back into street clothes, he devised his approach. If he wanted to involve Neely in an activity that connected them, he needed a plan, short range and long range.

Plan A would involve fun times. Time to talk. Since exercising seemed one of her goals, he could begin there. When he stepped from the locker room, he eyed the desk, and Cindy flashed him a grin.

He sauntered over, hoping to look casual. “I have a question.”

“Anything you want, Jon.”

Calling him by his first name tickled him. No one at the center seemed to know who he was, but Cindy always did. “An old friend of mine moved home for a while, and I told her about the fitness center. I wondered if she’d joined.”

She tilted her head. “A friend?”

He shrugged. “She’s my sister’s friend. Neely Andrews. Do you know if she’s a member?”

She studied him a minute as if he’d asked for Neely’s address or phone number.

“I’ve known her for years. I’m just curious.”

Without a comment, she opened a file on her computer. “She joined three days ago. She hit us on a good day. We were running a special.”

“Great.” He stepped back, weighing the ogling grin on her face. “Thanks for the information.”

“Anything else I can do for you?” She closed the file with a click and rested her cheek on her fist. “Anything. Just ask.” She flashed him another smile.

Feeling uneasy, he slipped his hands in his pockets and backed away. “Nothing else today.” He spun around and headed out the door, wondering what was up with Cindy.

His uneasiness vanished when he hit the sidewalk. Neely had a membership, and he hoped he’d run into her there, but he feared she’d come during the day when he was at work. Then he’d have to revert to plan B. As yet, he didn’t have a solid one. But he’d work on it.

* * *

Neely stretched back her shoulders to release the strain. Being away from the gym the past weeks had taken its toll, and though she’d tried running the school track, she didn’t have the commitment that investing money motivated. She’d joined the gym a week ago, and already she saw a difference on her scale.

Her legs burning, she forged ahead, determined to focus on the stair machine. She’d jumped from treadmill to bike to weights and now the steps. She hated them, but her personal trainer in Indianapolis explained the importance, for both toning and for general good health. Having someone guide her worked better than wandering from machine to machine with no method.

Although a trainer would be best, it was expensive. She had to be sensible now that her only income was workers’ compensation, and she wanted no part in depleting her savings. She longed to buy a house of her own.

The exercise accomplished something else important. It cleared her mind. At home with only her dad to talk with, she’d let herself bog down with thoughts of Erik and her history with him. The memories swelled like an abscess. Instead of the fun memories of their earlier time together, she remembered only the bad ones. After she’d started college, the situation struck her hard. She fought the desire to contact him, but as more time passed, when she finally arrived home, she learned through friends that he’d been dating, and she was frustrated that he’d used her with promises of commitment, and then moved on without making an attempt to win her back.

Since the night she gave in to his pressure, she’d never been the same. Instead of beautiful memories of an intimate relationship between husband and wife, her mind was bogged down with shame and a sense of being soiled. She wondered what Jonny would think if he knew. She could only guess he’d be disappointed since he seemed to think she was so great.

Burying the thoughts for now, she studied her surroundings. Since arriving, her eyes kept shifting to the doorway, and the involuntary reaction irked her. She’d wondered if she would see Jonny one late afternoon, but he hadn’t appeared. Disappointment zapped her each time a tall, masculine frame strode through the entrance, and when she focused on the man, she’d see it wasn’t Jonny. Then she spent the next few minutes chastising herself for caring who came through the door. Jonny could be a friend. Nothing more.

She eyed her watch and settled on another fifteen minutes, ten to exercise and five to cool down. She tackled the stair machine, keeping her eyes on the digital screen and holding back a groan with each step.

“You’ve worked up a sweat.”

Her heart skipped. Amazed, she lifted her eyes to Jonny’s. “I like to call it glowing.”

He stood beside the machine, a grin on his face.

“You won’t believe this but I was just thinking of—” She caught herself. Jonny would want to know what she was thinking, and when she told him, he would ask, “Why were you thinking of me?” And she didn’t know why.

“Thinking of what?”

“Winding down.” Saved. She didn’t want to lie, but that was also the truth.

“I was doing laps in the pool.” He gave a head toss in that direction. “I decided to do something different today.” He flexed his shoulders. “Swimming gives different muscles a workout.”

She nodded, her concentration failing.

He stood still, watching her as she slowed her steps for the cool down, but her mind slowed, too, and all she could do is gaze at the new Jonny. His gaunt jaw had strengthened and molded into a square chin, today with the hint of dark bristles. She’d never thought of him as rugged, but that’s what he’d become—strong features, classically handsome, with well-shaped lips, cheeks with the glint of a dimple, short dark wavy hair contrasting with his amazing blue eyes.

She managed to find her voice. “I took your advice and here I am.” She gestured to the workout room. “No personal trainer, but I’m trying to follow the advice from the one I had in Indianapolis.”

“They’re helpful.” He looked thoughtful. “I think you get a free hour of personal training with your membership, don’t you?”

“Yes, but I haven’t scheduled it yet.” She slowed to a stop and stepped off. “I’m finished for today. My muscles can’t take another step.”

“I know a lot about exercise so if you have any questions, just ask. I keep my boys pretty fit back at school.” He dragged the towel from the bar where she’d hung it and daubed her cheeks and forehead before handing it to her.

Her heart skipped, and it irked her. Those unexpected sensations threw her off balance. This was Jonny. She had to remember that. He looked at her as if waiting for a response. “Thanks for the offer and your assistance.” She dangled the towel in front of him. “You were very gallant.”

“I wouldn’t call it ‘gallant.’ ‘Practical’ is better. Glow can burn your eyes.” He sent her a coy look. “If you’re heading for the locker room, I’ll walk with you.”

She gathered her towel and water bottle, took a long swig, and trudged beside him to the locker room. Her legs trembled with each step, and she wasn’t sure if the sensation was her muscles groaning or her unexplained reaction when she was with him.

When she reached the women’s locker room, he kept going but before she was out of earshot, he called over his shoulder. “By the way I have a proposition for you.”

Talk about a heart skip. She dragged air into her lungs. “What kind of proposition?”

He motioned down the hallway. “I’ll wait for you near the door.” And he was gone.

Proposition. The word piqued her interest. While the shower splashed against her skin, easing her aches, nothing eased her mind. She stood in the spray, sorting through her foolish reaction to Jonny. If she’d met him on the street as a stranger, her resistance would have vanished, but their past relationship ruined that.

Her body humming with warmth and the apprehension of hearing Jonny’s proposition, she turned off the water, toweled down and donned her street clothes. She ran a comb through her hair and peered at her unadorned face in the mirror. Usually after exercising she didn’t bother with makeup, and even today, reality reminded her that Jonny had seen her looking worse than she did today, but the more she gazed at her drab face, the more the image of Jeannie Hunt’s turned-up nose filled her mind.

Releasing a sigh, she drew out her makeup bag, brushed blush on her cheeks, dragged the mascara brush over her lashes, and guided lipstick over her mouth. She couldn’t fool him with cosmetics, but at least she felt better. She dropped her towel and damp clothes into her duffle bag, then slipped her makeup and comb into the little zipper compartment and strode toward the exit.

Jonny smiled as she approached, and pushed open the outside door.

“Did you wait long?”

His eyes captured hers. “Seems like a lifetime.”

The comment held a lilt of humor, but she sensed something deeper in his words. She walked beside him, her tight muscles sending messages to her brain that she’d overdone her exercise today, but she didn’t care. She kept pace with Jonny’s long legs, waiting to hear what he had to say.

“Which is your car?”

She pointed to her sport sedan, wondering if he’d forgotten about his proposition.

“Nice. I like the copper color.” He strode beside her in silence.

When they reached her car, she hit the unlock button and gave up wondering. “I thought you had something you wanted to propose.”

He rested his back against the side of her car. “Right. I do.” He tucked his hands into his jacket pocket. “When we were talking about Rainie’s engagement party, I meant to ask if you’d like me to pick you up. No sense in both of us driving.”

Proposition had held more promise than the offer of a ride. “You don’t have a date?”

“Me? No.” His smile faded. “Unless you’ve already made plans.”

“No plans. I thought I’d go alone.”

His face darkened.

Her pulse skipped. “But I don’t need to go alone. I’d be happy to have you pick me up if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind at all.” He gazed at her a moment, and then extended his hand.

She eyed it, realizing he was waiting for a shake. She slipped her hand in his, feeling the heat roll up her arm to her chest.

He squeezed her fingers, gave a faint nod and released her hand. “I should have asked the other day, but I know you were dealing with little Jonny the pest, and I didn’t know if—”

“I’m sorry, Jonny. I don’t mean to make such a big deal out of it, but those memories seem to stay in my mind.” Along with the other dark ones she couldn’t get rid of, either.

“It’s okay, Neely. Maybe in time.”

In time. Maybe. She studied his classic good looks, his dark hair with those crystal-blue eyes. Maybe one day she’d even remember to call him Jon.

Chapter Three

“Auntie.”

Joey’s squeal made Neely smile before she climbed from her sedan. She opened her arms as he leaped forward, and held him against her, his legs kicking in delight. The feel of her nephew’s cheek against hers, the tightness of the two-year-old’s arms, warmed her inside and out. “Where’s your mama?”

“In.” He swung his chunky arm toward the house, and she balanced his weight on her hip as she trudged to the screen door and pulled it open. “Ashley?”

Her sister darted into the kitchen, and when she saw Joey, surprise lit her face. “Was he outside?”

“Looks like it.” She gave the toddler a bounce, and set him on the floor.

Ashley knelt in front of him and shook her head. “Joey. You can’t go outside without Mama. You know that.”

He pointed to the heavens. “Birdies.”

She gave Neely a helpless look. “Yes, birdies, but ask Mama to go out with you, okay?”

Joey studied her a moment, as if he wanted to digest her request.

She shifted his chin so he faced her. “Do you want a time out?”

His head swung back and forth like a flag in the wind.

“Then you ask Mama so we can go outside together. Okay?”

“’kay.” His decisive response rang with agreement. Apparently the time out did the trick.

Neely glowed, seeing again the intelligence of her nephew. His speech and abilities seemed ahead of his age. He had his daddy’s smarts and his mama’s loving ways.

Ashley shook her head, her expression wearing the look of defeat as Joey ran into the next room. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with him. He’s already a handful at two.”

Neely chuckled “The terrible twos. But he’s verging on three. Hopefully it won’t be long.” She wrapped her arm around her sister’s shoulder, and guided her through the doorway where Joey had settled on the living room floor with a pile of blocks and miniature cars. “How are you?”

Ashley sank onto the sofa and motioned her to an easy chair. Moisture shone in her eyes and twisted Neely’s heart. Almost two years had passed since Ashley’s husband died for his country in the Middle East, but the pain of losing a soul mate couldn’t be marked by years. The sorrow lasted a lifetime.

Her sister brushed away her tears. “Sorry, it still hits hard once in a while, especially days when Joey’s antics are involved. I wish Adam could have known him, even for a little while.”

Neely rose and settled beside her sister, grasping her hand. “Ash, he knew Joey. He knew him from the photos and all that you shared in your letters.” Her words sounded empty. “You want more than that. I understand. But they’ll meet one day, and what a glorious reunion they’ll have.”

Ashley rested her head on Neely’s shoulder. “In heaven, you mean.”

She could only nod, struggling to swallow the lump in her throat.

“You’re right, sis.” She raised her head followed by a ragged breath. “God gave me part of Adam when he blessed us with a son. I can be grateful for that, and for the time I had with Adam. I have to remember he died doing what he thought was right.” She lowered her head with an easy wag. “Think of the many men and women who died in Afghanistan and left no children behind.”

Her own lack of a family tinged her mind. “You’re right, Ash. God gave you a wonderful gift.” She motioned to Joey, absorbed with his cars and the block structure he’d devised. “And he’s so bright. His hand-eye coordination is amazing.”

Ashley smiled. “He takes after Adam.”

Neely’s purpose for stopping by became trivial in the midst of their conversation. She longed to say so many things that were brilliant and helpful, but she was lost. At this point in her life, she had no husband, no children, no way to deeply relate to her sister’s sorrow.

Ashley’s grieved expression smoothed away. “Let’s talk about you. I haven’t heard from you for a few days.”

The reference to her absence made her feel enveloped in failure. She’d come home to spend time with her father and sister, but for the past few days her mind had been on running into Jonny and jolted by his reference to Erik. “I’ve been trying to get Dad settled. He needs to accept his condition and take better care of himself.” Her excuse sounded feeble. A phone call took minutes.

“If anyone can do it, you can.” Ashley nudged her. “Determination.”

Neely grinned but didn’t bother to respond since she had no rebuttal. Ashley’s point was too true. “Another thing I’ve done is started to exercise, and I’ve joined a gym.” She gave her rounded hip a couple of pats. “I need to get back in shape.” She gazed at her slender sister, aware that grief had taken off her pounds. “You remember my friend Lorraine Turner. Her brother Jonny told me about a new place called Tone and Trim Fitness Center. Remember him? He was such a pest?”

Ashley’s chuckle lifted her spirit. “Not anymore, I bet. That was thirteen or fourteen years ago. Boys grow into men.”

Jonny’s image bolted into her mind, and warmth rolled up her neck. “Right. He’s not a boy anymore. You should see him. If he weren’t so young, and if I could forget the past, I’d be batting my eyes at him.” A wince of reality shivered down her back. She probably had battered her eyes at him without wanting to.

“How much younger is he?”

“Four years.” She shrugged, ignoring her escalating pulse. “He was such a—”

“Four years. That’s nothing. The older you get age issues fade away. The guy’s twenty-eight. If that’s not a man, I don’t know what is.”

His tapered frame, broad shoulders trimming to a tight waist and long legs filled her mind. And those eyes.

Ashley shook her head as if Neely were an idiot. “I’m sure he’s changed...besides looks, I mean?”

“Obviously. He’s older. He makes me laugh. He’s thoughtful. He showed concern about Dad and you, Ash. Very sincere. It touched me.” The conversation hedged on danger. Ashley’s expression already hinted at a comment brewing in her mind. “One thing for sure, I was impressed he doesn’t hate me.” She managed a grin. “You know he could with the way I treated him.”

“So what’s the downside of this guy?”

The question hung on the air. Downside? Her memory replayed their recent conversation, and she came up empty.

Ashley released a puff of air. “No downside?”

“I’m sure he has some.” Age, but Ashley already pooh-poohed that one. “I just can’t come up with any right now.” The reality of her answer threw her. “He’d be a catch for anyone.” Anyone but her. She couldn’t get past their previous relationship. But she couldn’t say it. Ashley had already negated that.

A fresh idea popped into her head. If Ashley were ready for a relationship, she would be blessed with Jonny as a husband. “Are you getting out at all, Ash?”

Her sister gave her a blank look.

“You need to socialize. How about a different job?” She loved the turn of the conversation. It got her sister off her back. “Maybe I should take care of Joey, and let you have a chance to meet some—”

“Stop.” Ashley’s hand flexed upward. “I’m working. I’m typing letters, addressing envelopes and creating some promotional materials for a few small businesses, and I can do that at home. Joey needs a parent, and I’m it.” She arched a brow. “And I suspect you have more on you mind than my socializing with women. Men? I don’t know, Neely. I’m waiting for that special someone.” Her gaze drifted out the window and the same gloom filled her face. “Adam and I had an amazing relationship. I won’t settle for anything less.”

“You’ll never know until you give someone a chance, Ash. You’re pushing me to find a relationship, and yet you’re—”

“It’ll happen.” Ashley’s gaze penetrated hers. “But it has to be natural. It’s something that can’t be planned.” She shook her head, the hint of a grin on her lips. “No blind dates.”

With her matchmaking efforts thwarted, Neely dropped the subject. “Speaking of men. I didn’t tell you everything.”

“Everything about Jonny?

“No, Erik.”

Ashley drew back. “Erik. You mean ‘the’ Erik. I thought that ended long ago.”

“It did, and that’s how I want it.”

Ashley’s expression fell askew. “Is there a problem? Why is he an issue now?”

“Jonny told me he would be at Rainie’s engagement party. I didn’t realize Erik was still in town.” Her skin prickled with memories. “I want to steer clear of him. How can I do that now?”

Ashley’s brow arched. “Say hi and walk away. It’s no big deal, Neely. Find a date. Do you know anyone who would—”

“Jonny told me he’d be happy to drive me there.” She brightened as a new idea struck her. “Maybe he can pretend that I’m his date.” The possibility dampened, and she faltered. “But I’m not sure that would make a difference with Erik. He knows how to add pressure.”

Memories spewed in her mind. His persistence to prove her love had been unending until she’d given in, and he didn’t stop there. When he managed to get her somewhere alone, he’d laugh if she said no. “What difference does it make now,” he’d ask, and he’d knock down every reason she named. Giving in had been a horrible mistake. After that experience she felt as if the men she’d dated had the same motive in mind, and that’s why she’d decided sticking to God’s will was her answer.

Instead of smiling, Ashley sat in silence, a frown growing on her face. “Did I hear you right? You want to use Jonny?”

“It’s not exactly using him.” Her pulse kicked. “He offered to pick me up and—”

“He offered a ride.” Ash shook her head. “You treated him awfully when he was a kid, and now you plan to use him for your purpose again. You’re using him as a battering ram.”

She winced at her sister’s comment. Though Ashley didn’t know about her intimacy with Erik, she’d expected her to understand why she wanted to hide behind Jonny’s presence.

“How does Jonny feel about this?” Ashley’s thoughtful look unsettled her.

Neely swallowed, already knowing what her sister would say. “I didn’t explain it to him yet.”

“You think he’ll want to be your pawn. You think he’s not good enough for a real date.” Ashley drew in a lengthy breath while Neely waited for her to continue. “I see.”

She didn’t, and she never would understand until Neely told her the truth about letting Erik take advantage of her, and her pride wouldn’t do that.

“He’s four years younger than me. He poured sand in my hair when he was a kid. I’m not going to date him for real. And I’m not playing a game with him.” Neely held her breath.

“You don’t think so?” A grim look slipped over her face. “It’s more than that, Neely. It’s something I’ve noticed and—”

“More than what? I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Ashley’s expression made her uneasy.

“You remind me of Mother.”

Neely’s head jerked back. “Mother? Never.” Ice ran through her veins. “Why would you say that?”

“Do you recall problems you had with Mom?” She gave her head a sharp shake. “That we had?”

“She was self-focused.” But that wasn’t all, and Ashley knew it.

“And critical. No matter how hard Daddy tried to please her, he didn’t do it the right way. He didn’t say the right thing. He didn’t wear the right tie. He didn’t drive slow enough or fast enough.”

The words bit through Neely’s defense, but she toughened her guard. “I’m not critical like Mom. Not at all.”

“It’s not identical, but you find fault with people when you become vulnerable.”

She opened her mouth to rebut, but Ashley flexed her palm.

“Don’t stop me, sis. I’m saying this because I love you.”

Neely had heard it before. She could hear her mother’s nitpicking voice ring in her ears. “What are you talking about? How am I vulnerable?”

“When Erik got too close, you backed away, looking for greener grass as they say. You thought maybe the future held something better.”

“And it did.” Her voice split the air, and Joey let out a whimper. She winced at her lack of control.

“Maybe so, but you walked in here and told me how Jonny was kind and good-looking and someone you could be interested in, but then you attacked his age.” Ashley looked heavenward and shook her head. “His age? Is that not stupid? I wouldn’t have cared if Adam had been six years younger than me. I noticed him first for his looks, but I fell in love with him for his wonderful qualities. You need to value people for what’s important.”

Neely cringed. She’d made a mistake talking with Ashley about anything related to men. She’d lost her husband, and that had skewed her attitude.

Ashley rose and lifted Joey in her arms, giving him a hug. He eyed her a moment, and then squirmed down toward the floor. She settled him back amid the cars and blocks, and then dug into his toy box for a couple new distractions.

Looking at two people she loved, Neely felt an ache in her chest. Why had Ashley thrown their mother in her face? Her sister knew her motivation for leaving town was her mother’s constant criticism, and she’d just grown more determined to get away. And while duty had motivated her homecoming, once she’d arrived, love and hope overpowered her need to make retribution for her absence.

“I know you’re being like a big sister, Ash, but you’re confusing me. Why do you say I didn’t find something better? I had a good job—”

“Wait a minute. You walked away from your life in Indianapolis. If it was so great, why would you leave your apartment, your friends, and more job opportunities than you’ll find here in Michigan. Positions aren’t easy to come by.” Instead of returning to the sofa, she sank into an easy chair. “Now you’re worried about Erik, and that doesn’t make sense. Brush him off. If you’re not interested in Jonny, don’t lead him on for your own purpose. Jonny sounds like a nice guy, and maybe someone who could make you happy, but you won’t give him a chance. Or any guy for that matter, it seems. When I fell in love with Adam, I married him for better or worse, sis. I didn’t expect worse, but it happened. Still, I wouldn’t give up one moment of our time together and the love we shared.” Her gaze drifted to Joey.

Ashley’s words jolted her. “Maybe I wasn’t in love with Erik, but I thought I was. I certainly never loved Jonny although I will admit as much as I bad-mouthed him, I found his attentiveness cute. I don’t want to hurt Jonny now. I planned to be honest with him. No games.”

“There’s no harm, I suppose, if you’re honest and he agrees.” She closed her eyes with the look of exasperation. “But you’ve told me he’s a great guy. Don’t slough him off. See where your friendship goes.” She rested her hands on her knees, and leaned forward. “Real love is wonderful, Neely. I want love to find me again. No one will ever replace Adam, but I miss feeling complete. Part of me feels empty as if something is missing. I want to feel whole again, but it will take someone special.”

Drawing her shoulders back, Ashley straightened. “I want you to know that kind of love. When you described Jonny, I sensed that he could be a special person, and for once in your life, you couldn’t find one thing wrong with him.” She gave Neely a pointed look. “Except he’s a couple years younger.”

“Four.”

Ashley rolled her eyes. “Four years. Open your eyes to opportunities, Neely. Mom criticized her way through life never really seeing the man who loved her so much.”

“Dad.” The word caught in her throat.

“He forgave her...always, and he tolerated her constant badgering not because he wasn’t strong, but because he loved her. Love is a power beyond understanding. When you find it, it will glue itself to your thoughts and your heart.”

“Maybe, Ash, but I don’t know if I will ever feel that kind of love.”

Her sister grinned. “One of these days, I’ll be able to say ‘I told you so.’” She rose and settled beside Neely. “My advice, sis, is keep your eyes and heart open, and love will find you, and then knock your socks off.”

Ashley grinned and opened her arms while Neely molded into her embrace. If anyone knew about love, it was Ashley.

Chapter Four

Neely looked out her bedroom window, anticipating Jonny’s arrival to take her to Rainie and Ty’s engagement party. She wished she would have talked with him first about pretending she was his date. She’d never had a chance, and when she saw him at the gym, others were around and it didn’t seem the right place.

The more she planned to ask him, the more her sister’s comments stopped her. Using him as a battering ram—her sister’s words—made her flinch, and though she thought Ashley’s analogy was a poor one, she still got the idea. She wanted to use him as a buffer between her and Erik. The problem might not arise, but if so, she hoped Jonny would understand.

How did she expect anyone to understand without knowing the details? The question nudged her so often, but being honest about the situation meant soiling her reputation and making her vulnerable. She couldn’t handle that.

She checked her dress in the long mirror. The A-line style in deep teal hung in soft folds and camouflaged her less-than-perfect figure, although she’d already lost a few pounds at the gym. She’d come home to be a support to her dad and sister, but she faced her other motive. She wanted to remake herself as well as her body. Though she disagreed with Ashley again on being like her mother, she had to admit that she did tend to run from problems. Her issues with Erik and her mother had been prime examples, but now she’d returned and had to deal with the same conflict unless Erik had changed. She could only hope.

The doorbell rang, and she looked down from the upper window. Jonny’s car had rolled into the driveway while she’d been preoccupied. Her dad’s voice sounded from the foyer, followed by Jonny’s greeting. She grasped her small handbag and hurried down the steps. Before she reached the bottom, she faltered, her heartbeat skipping as she eyed Jonny in a dark-colored suit with a white shirt and conservative dark tie.

He took her breath away. She hadn’t realized the width of his shoulders until now. As she opened her mouth to compliment him, Jonny cut her off with his own comment.

“You look beautiful, Neely.” He reached for her hand as she left the last step, and squeezed her fingers. “I’ll bring her home safe and sound, Mr. Andrews.”

Her father chuckled, and rested his hand on Jonny’s shoulder. “I know I can trust you, Jon. You’re a good man.”

She grinned at her dad, agreeing that Jonny had grown into a wonderful man. The more the truth hit her the worse she felt using him as protection. She hoped it didn’t come to that.

“Daddy, I want you to stay downstairs until I get back. You have everything you need down here, and when I get home, I’ll be with you when you walk upstairs.”

Her father shook his head as if she were a blithering idiot. “What can I do with this girl, Jon? She thinks I’m an invalid.”

“She loves you, Mr. Andrews.”

She grinned at Jonny who’d backed toward the door, grateful he hadn’t agreed that she’d been overreacting. She drew closer and kissed her father’s cheek. “Do as I say, Daddy, and I’ll be home no later than midnight—probably earlier.” She eyed Jonny for validation, but he only grinned.

“Good night, sir.” He turned the knob, and pulled the door open, then held it for her to step outside.

Neely gave a final wave at her dad standing in the doorway as he’d done when she was a teenager. She grinned, thinking about those years when she felt protected and supported. This time it was her turn to protect her father, a kind of reversal of roles she’d never anticipated but one she accepted.

Jonny opened the passenger door of his car, and she slipped inside, admiring his tall frame as he rounded the hood to the driver side. When he settled beside her, a woodsy scent enveloped her, and she drew it in, admiring the man who wore it.

“Your dad looks pretty good.” He started the car, and shifted into Reverse.

“You should have seen him a few weeks ago.” She shook her head with the memory. “I think it was the fear in his eyes that bothered me the most. I’ve never seen Daddy vulnerable, but that’s exactly what he was.”

“Severe illnesses remind us of our finite nature.” He guided the car onto the street and pulled away. “Heart attacks, accidents, diseases can attack us at any time. Even when we’re fit.”

She agreed, sorry that the topic came up. No one wanted to think of life ending so soon. But it did, and that meant each person had to be ready. She closed her eyes, wishing she didn’t feel the weight of her sins.

“Speaking of fit.”

Jonny’s voice drew her back. “You’re looking great, Neely. I’ve noticed the weight you lost although you’ve always looked good.”

She grinned, using his compliment to give a lift to her spirit. “Thanks, but that would be in the eye of the beholder, as they say. I behold pounds.”

“You’re too hard on yourself.”

Maybe she was.

“If the weather stays this nice, we should take advantage it and enjoy the outdoors. Wilson Park has an in-line skating rink. I use it sometimes for running.”

“Fresh air and sunshine. Sounds good.”

“Next week. I’ll call you.”

She nodded, asking herself why she had gotten herself so involved in Jonny. She needed motivation to exercise and doing it with someone added fun to the job, but Jonny? Sometimes she thought of herself as a fly caught in a spider web and tempting fate. She gazed at him again, and grinned. Jonny was the best-looking web weaver she’d ever run into.

When they reached the steak house, Jonny slipped from behind the wheel and was at her door before she could unhook her seat belt. When she stepped onto the asphalt, he closed and locked the door, and clasped her arm as they headed to the entrance. Though he had no idea that she’d considered asking him to pretend the outing was a date, he gave the illusion with his attentiveness. Grateful she hadn’t asked, she accepted the attention as they went inside.

The maître d’ guided them to the banquet room, and when they stepped inside, a good feeling washed over her. She and Rainie had dreamed of the day when they would walk down the aisle, each promising to ask the other to be their maid or matron of honor. In a few months, she would fulfill her part of the promise. Rainie’s part of the promise seemed like a faraway dream.

“Neely.” Rainie stood with a group of women and waved her over.

She slipped her arm from Jonny’s grasp. “Your sister calls.”

He gave a nod, and headed for Ty without looking back.

She stood a moment to watch him cross the room, part of her wondering how it might be to really be on a date with Jonny.

When she turned toward Rainie, someone caught her arm. Glancing over her shoulder, she cringed and then pulled herself together before facing him. “Erik, how are you?”

“Neely.” He stared at her, his jaw loose as if it had a broken hinge. “Wow! You’re the last person in the world I expected to run into.”

His gaze swept over her, and her discomfort increased. Words were lost in the jumble of thoughts running through her head. He’d grown more handsome. His boyish features had matured and strengthened. His sandy-colored hair had darkened to saddle brown, worn in a typical executive style with a fresh-cut look. He wore a sport coat with his shirt open at the neck and had the air of a man who’d just come from a business meeting.

Erik’s eyes searched hers. “You look healthy.”

Did he mean fat? Flushed? She probably was. Her face burned, as their past reeled into her mind. “Thanks. You look well, too, Erik.” Though her pulse raged, she managed to keep an even tone. Why did he have to approach her when she was alone?

A waitress shifted beside Erik with a tray. “Would you like a drink?”

Erik grasped a wineglass while she eyed the tray for a soft drink. “Is that cola?”

“It is.” The woman smiled and handed her the glass, then moved away to offer drinks to other guests.

Neely watched her go, wishing the woman would stay and chat. She scanned the guests hoping to catch Jonny’s attention but he’d vanished. She wished Erik would. She sipped her drink before focusing on him.

He swirled the red wine in the stemware, and sniffed the scent before he spoke. “Sorry about your dad. I heard he had quite a time.”

Surprised he’d mentioned her father, she took a second to respond. “Thanks. His health is one reason I came home. I knew he’d need watching, and Ashley has her hands full.”

“Yes, I heard about your sister’s loss, too.” He rested his hand on hers. “So you’re here to stay?”

“That depends.” She pressed her lips together and stepped back, hoping he’d withdraw his hand. He didn’t.

A grin stole to his mouth. “Depends on what?”

“On my dad’s health and the job market.”

His gaze slipped to her left hand. “You’re still single?”

Her chest constricted, and a response clung to her throat. Finally she found her words. “Yes, and very happy about that.”

“Really?” His head flew back so hard, she feared he gave himself a whiplash. “I always pictured you with the country-club crowd. Remember our plans.”

“Country club? I don’t think so. The lady said she’s happy.”

Jonny’s voice rolled through her, and she sent a thank-you to heaven. “Jonny, where have you been?”

“I was trapped by a football fan.” He shifted his attention to Erik. “How’s business?” Jonny’s question salved the uncomfortable situation, and she relaxed, grateful he’d come to her rescue.

She listened to them talk about their work while her mind weighed the burden of having Erik come back into her life. She’d hoped he’d moved away to a big city somewhere. At the moment, she wanted to move away from him. She scanned the room until she spotted Rainie, remembering she’d flagged her down minutes earlier. She had her excuse to say goodbye, and leave the men with their conversation.

While she waited for a break to cut in, Jonny slipped his arm around her waist, and gave her a gorgeous smile. Her heart flew to her throat. She hadn’t asked him to protect her, but that’s what he was doing.

Erik didn’t miss the move. His face flickered with question as tension tightened his jaw. “What are you two doing together?”

She had no idea what to say, and searched Jonny’s face waiting for him to reply, but he didn’t. He only grinned.

Neely grinned, too, waiting.

Erik’s gaze dropped to Jonny’s arm around her waist, and when he looked up, he managed a chuckle tinged with sarcasm. “I assume you’ve let bygones be bygones.”

Jonny arched his brow. “We’re not kids anymore, Erik. We put childish behaviors behind us.”

Neely wondered if Erik recognized the scripture reference. He’d never talked about faith. She was a believer, and she cringed again, knowing that she’d allowed him to manipulate her into ignoring her morals and upbringing for his pleasure.

Erik appeared to have gotten grip of his emotions. He gave her a wink, and lifted his wineglass. “It’s good to see you again, Neely. Let’s toast a new beginning.”

She studied him wanting to walk away, but this wasn’t the time for a confrontation. She lifted her soda glass while Erik held his drink posed until Jonny joined the toast. They clinked their glasses together, and when Erik lowered his, he captured her gaze with a coy grin. “I’ll let you two enjoy yourselves, and, Neely, tell your sister I’m sorry about her loss. She’s way too attractive to be alone, isn’t she? That’s too bad.”

His comment seemed a little glib. She flinched as he turned away, but Jonny’s hold on her waist soothed her, and when she turned her focus to him, the sight of his beautiful eyes washed away the tension.

Jonny chucked her chin. “That’s over. Let’s have some fun.”

She tiptoed up, and kissed his cheek. “Thank you.”

As they walked toward Rainie, Jonny almost gave the impression that this was a date, and she didn’t care. His protective nature nestled around her, and tonight she tried to forget the old Jonny. As Erik had said, she would toast a new Jonny and a new beginning.

* * *

Jon listened to girl talk between his sister and Neely for a few minutes, and then ambled away, unnoticed. He stood closer to the hall entrance and surveyed the crowd, seeing a few high school friends of Rainie’s but also people he really didn’t know. He spotted Erik who seemed to be charming a young woman Jon didn’t recognize. He wondered if Neely fell for the new-beginning toast. He wanted to gag, but what right did he have to interfere? Dreams didn’t count in the scheme of things. To be a winner meant developing a game plan by setting up plays, and then moving into action. He taught his boys how to play on the field, and now he wondered if the same skills could be used in relationships.

The whole situation plagued him. The best parts of the evening were Neely’s kiss on his check and Erik’s expression when he slipped his arm around Neely’s waist. He would have never had the courage except he knew she wanted nothing to do with Erik. He figured a flash of possession might thwart his obvious plans to hook Neely back into his arms.

He still wasn’t sure what caused her to be turned off by Erik, but whatever it was, he was glad.

An appetizer table he hadn’t noticed earlier appeared, and he wandered closer, eyeing the tidbits of food that were on the menu. Shrimp, cheeses, crackers, a series of chaffing dishes that promised tiny kabobs of meat, mushrooms with filling, and some he couldn’t make out, but the scent of herbs and spices rose from the table. He forked a couple of unknowns on the plate and carried it and his soft drink to a small empty table.

He savored one of the mystery items, thinking he’d go back and try another—maybe even learn its name, and as he reached for a meatball in sauce, a hand swept a sausage wrapped in a dough from his plate. He recognized the bracelet and grinned. “You’re welcome, Neely.”

She settled into the chair beside him, and took a bite of the appetizer. “Yummy.” She licked her lips, and then slipped his napkin from beneath the plate to wipe her fingers. “Thanks.” She motioned to the table. “I suppose I could get my own.”

“Here, finish mine.” He slid the plate in front of her. “I’ll load up another plate for both of us.”

She chuckled and delved into the stuffed mushroom. He hurried back and selected hors d’oeuvres for two plates, checked to make sure Erik was still preoccupied and carried the dishes back to the table. Erik’s country-club comment bothered him. He didn’t understand how that reference had entered the conversation. Neely had never seemed interested in all of that.

He set the plates on the table and returned to his chair. “What was that reference to country-club crowd?”

She drew in a deep breath and shook her head. “That was one of Erik’s encouragers.”

“Encouragers?” He let the word bounce in his mind. “Encouragers for what?”

“For a girl to be his wife. He thought everyone valued having membership in a country club. That was far from my mind.”

He chuckled. “Very far. You were down to earth. Always giving.”

“Me?” A grin brightened her face. “Look what you just did. You gave me your plate, and then went to fill two more. I don’t know why I’m surprised, I remember, as much as you irked me year ago, you were always thoughtful. Helpful, really.”

“So were you. You’ve always focused on the needs of others. I’ve seen you give a needy woman a piece of clothing you were wearing.”

Her eyes capture his. “I what?” She shook her head. “I don’t remember that? “

Maybe he’d admitted too much. “I helped you and Rainie take the canned goods you’d collected to a food kitchen in Detroit somewhere. It was October. I remember there was a chilly breeze, and...” He caught himself again, letting his sentence fade.

“October? Come on. How would you remember that?”

Her eyes grew as large as the pumpkin on her shirt that day. He’d done it. Too much information. He might as well tell her he could remember everything she wore back then. “When you gave the woman your sweater, underneath you were wearing a knit shirt that had a big pumpkin on it, and—”

“Jonny, I can’t believe you remembered that crazy pumpkin top.” Her gaping mouth drew into a smile. “I think I blocked that gaudy thing from my memory.”

But he hadn’t. When she’d hoisted the carton of food from the trunk, the sunlight hit her auburn hair and streaked it with gold, the color of leaves at the height of autumn. It had taken his breath away. He’d just turned fourteen, and Neely had become his first secret love.

Neely shook her head as a soft chuckle escaped her. “Why would you remember something like that?”

Talk about reality, the truth smacked him in the head. “Because I had the biggest crush on you.”

Her hand flew up, and flipped the edge of the plate. Two appetizers skipped to the table. She dropped them back on the plate, though her eyes never left him. “What are you saying? You had a crush on me?” She burst into a laugh. “You were a pesky kid.”

To her maybe, but to him, he was a man in love.

She lifted her hand and pressed his arm. “I’m sorry. I’m sure, at the time, you thought you were in love. I guess I did that, too. I remember picturing me in the arms of Leonardo DiCaprio.” She lifted her brows. “Sometimes I can still picture that.”

A faint chuckle tittered from her as if she were a teenager again.

She broke eye contact and smiled. “So you had a crush on me.”

Not had—have. He managed to return the grin as he picked up his drink. His tongue adhered to the roof of his mouth as if he’d eaten glue. She’d already taken his confession as a joke, and he needed to let it go for now. In time, he hoped she would see who he was from his actions. A man’s actions had to mean more than his age. He gazed at her, his mind going back. “Another thing I remember.”

“You remember more?”

“Not really.” He let it drop. He’d said too much already. “Want to mingle?” He started to rise but she grabbed the hem of his jacket and tugged.

“No, I want to know what you remember.”

Her lighthearted tone urged him on, and though he knew he could be digging his own demise, he decided to be open. He could be Jonny for now if that’s what it took. “The country-club comment reminded me of this.”

She frowned at first before brightening again. “Go ahead.”

“I remember once you said, ‘Who needs sterling silver and fine china. I like paper plates and plastic forks. No dishes to wash.’ You wrinkled your nose and laughed. I remember.”

“Were you memorizing my conversations with your sister?” She arched an eyebrow, and he couldn’t tell if she were teasing or upset.

“Crushes do that. Can’t you remember everything about Leonardo DiCaprio’s face when he stood on the bow of the Titanic with Kate Winslet?”

Her expression turned to a grin. “I guess you’re right.” She reached over, and rested her hand on his again. “I think we should mingle, but first, I want to thank you again for coming to my aid with Erik. He really bothers me.”

Her expression validated what she’d said. Erik ground him, too. “What was that comment about Ashley?”

“That’s what I’d like to know.” This time she did frown.

So did he, because he could only guess that Ashley could become the pawn of another of Erik’s manipulations to get what he wanted.

He didn’t like it at all.

Chapter Five

Neely opened the back door and stopped, seeing her father with his nose in the refrigerator. She eyed the clock. “It’s a little early for dinner, Dad. Are you hungry?”

“Can’t I eat a snack if I want to?”

His head remained behind the fridge door, and when he straightened, he backed away with a hunk of cheese and piece of ham. “I thought I’d have a sandwich.”

The clock read three-thirty. Neely shook her head. “Then that will be your dinner, I guess.”

“Dinner? I said it’s a snack.”

She jammed her fists into her waist. “A snack is an apple or a cookie, not a sandwich. That’s dinner.”

“Who said?” He ignored her by facing the counter as he built a sandwich.

“Your doctor. He said you needed to eat healthy and take off a little weight.”

Her dad waved his hand over his shoulder. “Pooh. What does he know?”

Her shoulders slumped. “You frustrate me, Dad.” She walked to his side, and touched his arm. “I don’t want to see you sick again. You need to take care of yourself.”

He gave her a half glance. “I am. I’m making a sandwich.”

Her hand slipped from his arm, and she shook her head. “Fine.” She headed toward the doorway, and then paused. Having a tiff with her dad would serve no purpose. “I had a nice visit with Ashley. We talked about going out to dinner tonight. Want to join us?”

“No. I’m happy at home.”

That was his problem. Since her mother died, he had lost motivation to live. He ate wrong, got no exercise, and stared at the TV. But his determination was stronger than hers and getting him to make changes seemed hopeless. She needed someone to prompt him to alter his choices, but it had to be someone he’d listen to. Apparently that person wasn’t her.

“Would you like to take a ride to Ash’s to see Joey? He’s getting cuter every day.”

He took a bite of his sandwich, and didn’t respond.

She guessed his answer. No. Not even Joey excited him. Though she didn’t want to stir up trouble, she knew she had to do something. “Dad.”

The telephone’s ring stopped her. Maybe it was for the best. She crossed the room and grabbed the receiver. Jonny’s voice caught her by surprise.

“How about running at the park today? You can’t count on another September day being so warm.”

Neely glanced at her father and figured he’d be glad to get rid of her for a couple of hours.

“What time?”

“I’ll pick you up at four.

“That works. I’ll be ready.” But she detested the excitement she felt.

“How about dinner afterward?”

Her pulse did a double flip, and then she remembered. “I made plans to eat out with Ashley, but you’d be welcome. She’d love to see you.” And maybe this could be the beginning of something wonderful for her sister, and that way, her pulse would tick at a normal rate. She’d never mess around with her sister’s boyfriend.

“Are you positive?”

She chuckled. “Yes, and you could meet Joey, too. He’s a charmer.”

“If you’re sure.”

She assured him, and then hung up. “I’m going for a run at Wilson Park, Dad, but I’ll be home to change before dinner. Think about it, please. Dinner with Ash and Joey would get you out of this house.”

He shook his head, and brushed her words away. “Stop worrying about me. You’re worse than your mother.” He grinned. “Besides, I already had dinner, remember?”

* * *

Neely braced her hands on her knees and caught her breath. Her legs burned from running, but the fresh air and sunshine made it worthwhile. She tilted her head upward and looked at Jonny who didn’t seem to be winded at all. “How many times did we run around the in-line skating track?”

“Too many.” He motioned toward the car. “We can walk to the car from here—no more running.

She chuckled at his playful comment, still rattled by her good feeling with him. “I had a great time today.”

“So did I. We can do this anytime.” He rested his hand on her shoulder. “You’re glowing, you know.”

“Do you mean sweat or a red face?”

He leaned back and laughed. “A real glow, healthy pink cheeks.”

The way he looked at her sent her pulse charging up her arm, and she cautioned her wayward thoughts. Ogling Rainie’s younger brother made no sense. She would be a cradle snatcher. And worse yet, how could she tell him the truth about her relationship with Erik? She couldn’t get involved with that mistake between them. He deserved a pure, wholesome wife. Jonny would always be...Jonny.

Though she told herself it was for the best, part of her fought the reality. She jerked her mind back to her resent plan. Jonny and Ashley. “What did you have in mind for dinner? I like to get my thoughts primed.”

He chucked and shrugged. “It’s your pick. Howe’s Bayou has a mean po’boy.”

“Crispy French bread filled with meat or fish.” She shook her head and grinned. “Fatten me up, will you?”

He slipped his arm around her shoulder, and squeezed. “Okay no po’boy. They have salads.”

“Is it quiet there? Good for talking?”

He drew back and eyed her. “I thought we were eating.”

She’d bungled. He and Ashley needed time to get to know each other if anything might happen, but playing matchmaker was against Ashley’s wishes and probably not on Jonny’s agenda, either. She faced it. The matchmaking idea had become her own self-defense against her crazy emotions. “I suppose you’re right.” She managed a playful expression. “Can we stop by and pick up Ashley on the way back to my house?” Then he could drop her off home after dinner. Her plan had taken a turn, but a good one.

He nodded, his mind seemingly focused on something else.

She pulled out her cell phone to warn Ashley of the new plan and to her surprise, Jonny headed in the right direction, as if he knew where Ashley lived. When he turned down the street, she pointed, but he’d already aimed the nose the car into the driveway. A frown tugged at her forehead but she managed to grin it away. Why he knew where Ashley lived was none of her business, and except for the tug of her heart, it didn’t matter.

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