A Man of His Time
ALAN SILLITOE

Contents

Cover

Title Page

Part One

One

Two

Three

Four

Part Two

Five

Six

Seven

Eight

Nine

Ten

Eleven

Twelve

Thirteen

Fourteen

Fifteen

Sixteen

Seventeen

Eighteen

Nineteen

Part Three

Twenty

Twenty-One

Twenty-Two

Twenty-Three

Twenty-Four

Twenty-Five

Twenty-Six

Twenty-Seven

Twenty-Eight

Twenty-Nine

Thirty

Thirty-One

Thirty-Two

Thirty-Three

P.S. Ideas, Interviews & Features …

About the Author

Interview with Alan Sillitoe

Life at a Glance

Top Ten Favourite Books

Q & A

About the Book

Sillitoe and the Smith

Sillitoe on Screen

Read On

Alan Sillitoe on Reading

The Nottingham Books

Have You Read?

If You Loved This You’ll Like …

The Web Detective

About the Author

Other Works

Copyright

About the Publisher

Part One 1887–1889

ONE

A tin alarm clock shattering the first glimpse of daylight broke into Ernest Burton’s dreamless sleep. At half-past five on May 2nd 1887 he strode to the mantelshelf in his nightshirt and turned the noise off so as not to wake his brother Edward in the same bed. The ironed striped shirt pulled over his head was followed by his second-best suit. Travelling in working clothes wasn’t for him. Finished at the end of the day with the world of fire and iron in the forge, you threw off the leather apron and washed sweat away with strong carbolic to spruce up for the alehouse. Or you walked into the garden to get a whiff of fresh air and bent your back to do some weeding. But on a journey you must look your best.

He arranged the watch and chain into his waistcoat, synchronized to the minute by the church clock. Time meant little to a blacksmith. You started work at six and if trade was good didn’t notice the hours till it got dark, but every minute away from the forge was for you to enjoy, not caring what the next hour would bring.

A sluice of the head from a bucket filled at the garden pump sharpened him further after last night in the White Hart supping a pint while talking to his mates and saying goodbye to the barmaid Mary Ann. He trawled fingers through short wet hair and, drying off, opened the curtains to let in light. At twenty-one, with his lines as a journeyman blacksmith, he was off to work for his brother George in South Wales, to get experience and earn his bread – as their father had said.

He’d been to Derby and Matlock, but now he was going to an unfamiliar place, and George who was eighteen years older had drilled him on how not to reach the wrong town by mistake. You had to go where the work was, blacksmiths being as common around here as houseflies in summer, but if the pay wasn’t good where he was going he’d come back even if he had to walk, though if all went well, which he expected, it would be better than putting up with the snipe-nosed lot in this area whose horses he shoed, like that preachifying lickspittle Bayley who spent all his spare hours on church business. Once when I fixed his nag he threw sixpence at me for a tip, so I looked him straight in the eye and left it for the striker. I don’t take tips, and only touch my cap to a personable woman.

In Wales I’ll be working for George, and he doesn’t stand for any cap-touching either. People who want their horses shod spout all the penny-pinching notions to save a farthing or two but make no bigger mistake because it isn’t economy in the end. They’d come back a lot sooner if I didn’t tackle the job my way. A badly shod horse is like a house with rotten foundations.

He took sticks from the warm oven to lay over last night’s embers and, when flames stopped chasing each other up the chimney, put the kettle on. Stropping his razor till the water turned hot, he filled a mug for as careful a shave as could be without leaving nicks of blood. You never knew what handsome woman might be met with on your travels.

A slice of pork fat over the piece of bread turned crisp at the heat. Normally it was a crust and a drop of water, before a proper breakfast in the forge at eight, but he was setting out on a journey, and didn’t want to get famished.

He checked his bag of tools by the door: hammer, buffer, rasp, drawing-knife, long pliers – everything in place. George told him he didn’t need to bring any. They were there already, he said, and they were a weight to carry. Well, George could think what he liked. You worked best with your own tools. You knew their balance. You kept them sharpened to your taste. They were always clean. And as for carrying them, what did you have arms for?

Ernest, at six-feet-five the tallest in the family, overlooked his father’s balding head when he came down dressed for work. ‘You must have been through those tools a dozen times already. They won’t run away.’

Ernest tied the string. ‘They wouldn’t get far if they did.’

‘Tell George when you see him he ought to send Sarah a bit more money.’

Ernest ignored him. You couldn’t tell George anything.

‘Did you hear me?’

He went through the other cloth bag to make sure of his best suit, spare shirts, razor, boots for walking out, a couple of ironed handkerchiefs, socks, a piece of towel, and some soap in an old tobacco tin. ‘I did.’

‘Tell him, then,’ but knowing he would get no more words from such a stiffnecked son.

His mother came in, a shawl over her nightgown, long grey hair not yet pinned. ‘You’re off, Ernest?’

‘I might as well be.’

He was her tenth child, and the youngest. ‘I’ve put bread and cheese in your bag, and some eggs.’

‘So I noticed.’

‘You’ll spoil him,’ his father said.

‘No, I won’t. He’ll not go hungry. It’s a long way.’

‘A couple of hundred miles, bar an inch or two, so George said.’ Ernest smiled. ‘I’ll be all right, Mother. I expect I’ll be back in six months.’

He might meet a girl and marry, stay away for good. Or there’d be an accident and he’d get killed. Or he’d catch a disease and die. Things happened to a young man of twenty-one. You could tell what she was thinking. ‘If you meet a nice girl who can write, ask her to send a letter and let me know how you are.’

A cold idea: if he found a girl it wouldn’t matter whether or not she could read and write. That wasn’t what he’d want her for.

‘Do you have enough handkerchiefs and shirts?’

‘All I’m likely to.’

She poured tea for his father, then for herself. ‘We should have sent you to the Board School. I always knew you’d have to go away.’

‘I don’t care about such things.’ He could tell time, and reckon the numbers for cash. When he was ten George saw him playing by the forge, and decided that nobody was too young to learn the trade. He would have started him earlier if his arms had been long enough and strong enough, and if their father had agreed. ‘Don’t worry about me, Mother. I can look after myself. And I’m not going to the other side of the world.’

His father, on a second cup of tea, looked up at Ernest. ‘It’s time you were off. You’ll need every bit of daylight to get there. The earlier the better.’

He took his jacket from the back of the door, put on his cap, folded the light raincoat over his arm, picked up both bags with one hand, and said nothing as he walked out.

Air fresh and pleasing, the birds whistled their hot little hearts out after a wormy breakfast. He lifted his cap to the windows of the White Hart hoping Mary Ann would wave back, but she’d be laying fires in the kitchen so couldn’t.

Long strides took him towards the hooting train and grey-black smoke over Lenton station. He could have saved a penny or two by walking to Beeston, more in the Derby direction, but the tool bag wasn’t light so he would put wheels under him as soon as possible. A young brewer, Harry Hughes, set out on foot last year to a promised job in Sunderland. Men did that, but no Burton was such a pauper he couldn’t afford twenty-one shillings for the workman’s fare. He’d put a bob or two by for a few months, denying himself the odd pint at times, to avoid the indignity of walking. He could have borrowed the money from his father, but wouldn’t owe anything to anybody.

Some come by good fortune easily. A bloke in the pub the other night said that a gang of labourers knocking a house down in the middle of town found what looked like pieces of tin or bottletops. They pelted each other till realizing they were ancient coins, when they ran to get a good price at the silversmith’s.

The five-minute ride into Nottingham took him by the castle, squat and bleak on its high rock, thunderclouds piling above he hoped wouldn’t follow him to Wales. Fifty or so years ago it was set on fire, an old codger told him who’d seen it as a youth, one of thousands cheering the rioters, the sky all flame when not blotted out by smoke. ‘I watched the fire till it started to rain, then walked home. Some of those who stayed were caught, and hanged.’ The Duke of Newcastle got twenty-one thousand pounds to have it built up again, so the poor paid for the bonfire out of their own pockets. All the same, it must have been a treat to see it go up.

Smoke in his throat at Derby station, he asked a porter which platform to stand on for Worcester. ‘You’ve got half an hour yet, sir, time for a cup of tea in the refreshment room.’

No reply to that. Time to go outside to the Midland Hotel as well, but he wasn’t thirsty, boots clattering on the ironwork of the footbridge, light in the head at belonging to nobody for a day, everything he owned on his back or in his hands, and not caring who was left behind – not even Mary Ann, if it came to that – or what he would find on getting where he had never been.

Tea urns steamed in the refreshment room but he stood outside watching engines and wagons shunting through, footplate men shovelling coal to keep the pistons moving, all the doing of that clever chap Stephenson who’d invented the things, though they’d taken some of the blacksmith’s trade.

Two young women went by – he’d bet a guinea they were sisters – the handsome one a year or two older but with the same small nose, pale high forehead, and cherry-rich lips a man would give a fortune to kiss, or stake his life to do even more. The older one wore a tall hat with embroidered flowers along the brim, but the other had a swathe of fair hair roped into a coil and pinned under a sort of yachting cap. Near the edge of the platform, halfway facing him, he fixed them with his eyes so that one or the other would sooner or later turn, and once they became aware of him they might want to make sure of what they had seen, and look again.

A goods train went to the shunting yards, another belched from the engine sheds. When the women moved from getting splashed at sudden rain the younger caught the fire of his grey-blue eyes, took in his tallness, and stare – firm but without being offensive – the trim moustache, and thin features. Premature speech was the mark of someone unsure of himself, though he didn’t want to lose an opportunity by such an attitude. If they got on a train before his at least he’d had the pleasure of being noticed. He could afford a look yet keep his dignity as a blacksmith.

Her smile was the best present he could wish for. If they were going in the Birmingham direction he would find himself by chance in the same carriage. ‘Are you travelling far?’

She must have liked the way he touched his cap, not to know he only ever did so for a woman. ‘We’re waiting to meet someone.’

It should have been obvious they weren’t going anywhere, without hatboxes and portmanteaux. ‘You live in Derby, I suppose?’

The glare from her sister deserved a smack in the mouth, but he touched his cap to her as well. She buttoned her mauve gloves, as if he might try to shake her hand. ‘Maud!’

‘We live at Spondon,’ Maud told him, ignoring her sister.

‘Do you ever go into Nottingham?’

‘Sometimes, to the shops.’

With such a smile the other would have trouble keeping her on the rein. ‘We might cross each other’s path, then.’

Most unlikely, her look said, nor had he thought so, but you never got anywhere unless you tried it on. He recalled delivering a piece of iron grating to a house in Nottingham, a bit of fancy work his father had done. The woman was a parson’s wife, but after a bit of joshing he’d had her on a couch in the summer-house.

The elder girl tilted her head. ‘Here’s the train, Maud. And they’ll be coming first-class.’

Pleased at the encounter, he hoped for better luck in Wales. A crowd along the platform, he pushed through before the train stopped, to find a seat.

Blossom from the trees came down like confetti at a wedding, as if earth and sky thought a meeting might do some good. The Trent flashed steely water now and again, meandered its merry way through the meadows. If the girls at Derby had got on the train he would have helped them into the carriage, a bit of a climb for such dainties, and if they hadn’t wanted to talk to him – though he couldn’t see why not – he’d have kept an eye on Maud for a mile or two. With the glint in her eyes she looked as if she’d spend marvellously, though he didn’t doubt that the one with the sour face would bring the house down as well when she came.

Forgetting them for a moment, he pictured Mary Ann at the White Hart, a well-built girl the same age as himself, worth twenty of them. The blue and white striped high-necked shirt with a lapis lazuli brooch at the throat told him she was no common sort of barmaid, as she assiduously filled the pint pots, or dispensed stronger stuff from a high façade of bottles behind the bar, responding with a flick of her auburn hair if anyone made the kind of remark she didn’t care to hear. He wasn’t daft enough to talk like that to any young woman.

On first seeing her and asking where she came from her soft though decisive voice had a different twang to the neighbourhood accent. She stood back to answer. ‘I was born at St Neots.’

‘Where might that be?’

‘In Huntingdonshire. I was a milliner’s apprentice’ – which showed in the neat dress fitting the slim waist so nicely, noticed as she walked into another room at the call of her mistress.

‘How did you come to find this situation?’ he asked another time.

‘My father saw an advertisement in the newspaper, and thought I’d be better off in service than looking for work as a milliner.’

She could read and write, so belonged to a decent family. ‘Are there many girls at home like you?’

‘I’m the fourteenth child out of fifteen,’ she told him, ‘but seven died when they were babies.’

‘That was a shame. I’m the youngest of ten, and we’re all still alive. Will you come out with me on Sunday afternoon? We can walk to the Trent. It’s pretty in the meadows.’

‘I only have one day off a month.’

He already knew, but the more words from her the better. ‘Come on that day.’

‘I can’t. I go to church. Mrs Lewin sees me there, and fetches me after the service. Then I have other things to do.’

He disliked being denied. ‘Such as what?’

‘I must write to let my parents know how I am. And then I have to see to my clothes.’

‘If that’s the way it is.’ Men at his elbow were calling for ale. ‘Pump me another before you go back to your work.’

He ignored her for a few weeks, though noticed her look in his direction when he asked Ada the other barmaid to fill his tankard. He could have had her for tuppence. Her mouth always open, he called her the Flycatcher, not that he had ever seen a fly go in, and she wasn’t bad-looking, but would have been prettier if she closed her mouth. Mrs Lewin the landlady told her about it once, but it didn’t get through. Even when she smiled her lips barely met but, gormless or not, she’d have done all right under a bush, though to try and get her there would have spoiled his chances with Mary Ann.

Hard to keep his glance from whatever part of the bar she was in, and enjoy the modest way she served, wondering how she could favour anybody more than him as she went quietly about her work. When not at the bar it was because Mrs Lewin had her attending to household matters in the back, or busy on a millinery job. She’d be a useful wife, though he wouldn’t tackle wedlock yet, there being so many willing girls in Nottingham.

He had gone home a few weeks ago with a woman called Leah who worked in a lace factory, her husband doing shifts as a railway shunter, and had the sort of time that showed no need to marry for what he wanted. A lovely robust woman ten years older, he seasoned her till she was greedy for all he could give, asking him to call any time he liked, as long as nobody else was in the house.

The only way of getting Mary Ann into bed, and he wouldn’t think anything of her otherwise, was with a marriage certificate pinned on the wall behind. So maybe he should ask her hand before anybody else did, though if she turned him down there were plenty of others to keep him busy.

He smiled when his name was called, on realizing it was that of the place they were stopping at, a smell of beer and hops wafting in from the breweries. The train went puffing its way by foundries and forges, workshops and coalpits, wholesome beer fumes replaced by a sulphurous stink. Laden drays trundled up to their axles in mud along lanes and tracks, but even if he got off here he would find work as a trained blacksmith, though he couldn’t because George was expecting him in Wales, and George didn’t wait for any man, brother or not.

It was George who had tutored him in the basics of the trade from the day he could swing bellows, shoulder pieces of iron, hump bags of coke to the fire, or hold a hammer with a firm hand, and any mishap on the uptake, or slowness in obedience, he got a blow across the shoulder with a bar of iron. George had a temper when it came to doing your work properly.

Filling the unfamiliar idleness Ernest recalled George’s fury after setting him to polish a pile of horse brasses. At eleven Ernest hadn’t brought out a sufficient shine so George held him against the wall and banged his head until stars prettier than any from the anvil followed him into blackness.

A few moments later Ernest ran into the street, George shouting him back, but Ernest was ashamed at having failed in his work, though knew he hadn’t deserved such a knocking-about either.

Thinking it better to do himself in rather than go back, he walked and ran through the streets and across fields, bitterness and anger holding the pain down, no one wondering why he moved with such speed and purpose. Beyond Old Engine Cottages and into the scrubland of the Cherry Orchard, he slowed down but kept on.

In Robin’s Wood he pushed through the undergrowth and stopped on seeing an older boy on his belly drinking from the brook. Ernest drew some into his stomach as well, splashed his head to cool the pain.

‘What’s up, surry?’ He was a farm youth, smart in his smock and leggings.

‘Nothing.’

‘Somebody been knocking you about, have they? Lost your tongue, eh? Well, next time somebody hits you, hit the devil back.’

The wood was peaceful, but he couldn’t stay, walked on, along a bridlepath to the canal, not much caring where he was going, ran across the lock gates for fear he would fall if he went too slowly. Maybe someone on the puffballs of cloud looked down at him running in his working clothes, exhausted, scruffy, his heart breaking.

Darkness chased him home, everyone gathering for supper. George was washed, and smoking his pipe, silent on their mother asking Ernest how he had got his bruises. He said nothing, so was told to wash himself and sit at the table to eat. It wouldn’t happen again. But it did, often enough, till he was fourteen when, as tall as George, he picked up a hammer and told him to do no more.

Now he could more than hold his own with George, who had turned him into as hard a man as himself, which was something to thank him for. George could still be surly and distant, but believed you had to help one another in the same family, it was human nature, if you didn’t you went under, like many who trod the smooth cobbles to the workhouse with their wives and children, too downhearted to look back.

Passengers getting on and off looked as if they had clinker sandwiches for their dinners every day. Dirty cottages, as dreary as he’d ever seen, squatted between heaps of slag and refuse, and if this was what people called the Black Country, he thought, they could shove it up their backsides; he was glad when the last of Birmingham went, and green fields turned up again.

A middle-aged grey-bearded titchbum of a chap came on board with two workmen in their aprons. Titchbum, who wore a pepper- and-salt suit, waistcoat, cravat, and watch chain with two sovereigns dangling, stabbed the air with opinionated snuff-stained fingers, pontificating thick and fast to the others about some poor bloke called Disraeli, for reasons Ernest couldn’t fathom. Then he went on about the price he could get for a bag of nails at his workshop, the other two men nodding like a couple of donkeys at the Goose Fair.

Titchbum ran out of topics, and turned to Ernest. ‘Where are you going, then?’

Ernest waited till asked again, Titchbum adding ‘sir’ as politeness called for, hardly a gold-plated sir, but Ernest told him: ‘Wales,’ and resumed his looking out of the window.

‘I expect you heard the first time.’ Titchbum’s finger came towards him. ‘Some people don’t know their place,’ he said to his companions. ‘Not like when I was young. And why might you be going to Wales?’

A word not spoken was a word saved, which might later be used with more effect on somebody else, if you were in the mood to let it. One of the few luxuries in life was the right to be silent, and you couldn’t let anybody take it away.

Titchbum’s friends looked at Ernest as if, since they had to truckle to their gaffer, so ought he. ‘I suppose he’s lost his tongue.’ Titchbum had a dry annoying I’m-the-cock-of-the-walk laugh. ‘Like a lot of young men who don’t have one to lose.’

Titchbum’s finger came too close. Words could be stopped from invading the mind, but the finger in his direction was different. Titchbum, as a ‘self-made man’ too much like Ernest’s father to tolerate for long, made him wonder why the fool had taken against him.

‘He must be a country bumpkin.’ Titchbum couldn’t leave well alone, as if he’d got worms, or a canker was eating his stomach. Maybe he’d drunk too much whisky with his breakfast, in which case Ernest would have understood, and ignored him.

‘I’d be quiet, if I was you.’ One of his men had caught Ernest’s stare. ‘He doesn’t work at our place.’

‘Neither will you, for much longer, if you don’t keep your opinion to yourself. Somebody like him doesn’t know when one of his betters is talking to him. I only asked a civil question.’

Ernest got up, fingers spread against the ceiling to steady himself. Titchbum couldn’t have realized his height, and remained sitting as a graven fist came close to his face. ‘Leave me alone, or I’ll throw you off the train.’

He sat to look at a pair of fine cavalry mounts running across a field – a tall trooper standing with a saddle over his arm.

‘It’s Droitwich in a minute,’ Titchbum said. ‘We get off there.’

At least one of them deserved a pasting, though none was worth hanging for. He laid a red-spotted handkerchief across his knees, opened a clasp knife, took cheese, bread, and two hard-boiled eggs from a paper bag, thanking his mother for a hungry man’s banquet, while the train rattled, and puffed its constant whistle. He could talk to other men in the pub for hours and not feel hungry, but on his own he ate as if reluctant to waste time, however much there was to spare in a train. A man who came in at Droitwich tipped his cap and wished him good morning. He received a nod in response; and then silence to Shrub Hill station in Worcester.

TWO

George had drilled in the procedure to get to the Great Western depot on Foregate Street. ‘You should be able to keep everything in your noddle and find the way, but be careful not to get drunk on Lea and Perrins Sauce! If you do, and you’re lost, don’t be too proud to ask. I know what you’re like. You’re a stuck-up young bogger. People enjoy it if you ask directions. Gives ’em a chance to do a good turn. So if you aren’t sure, open your haybox.’

Every landmark stood out as clear as the items of steel his father sent him to get from the wholesale merchants as a boy, and woe betide him if he came back with measurements that didn’t tally. He scoffed at George doubting his ability to keep all instructions in mind. George said that Ernest, being so tall, found it hard to see the ground when walking, yet always avoided treading in horse and dog muck. ‘I can’t think how you do it.’ Ernest did, had trained himself to notice what was everywhere with little or no swivel of the eyes.

After the church his usual striding walk carried him up Shrub Hill, across the canal, and forking left into a road called Lowesmoor. No station was hard to find, coal in the nose and smoke above the sheds, always a flow of traffic towards it, shunting noises to pull you the right way, a jumble of carriages and carts on getting there. The smile wasn’t entirely hidden by his moustache: George didn’t know everything, was a bit of an old man at times, too set at forty in the path of their father, something to pity him for.

His throat was as dry as the day, so he ordered a fourpenny pint in the crowded taproom of the Star Hotel, an elbow at ninety degrees so as not to be put off his drink by a nudge from the dinnertime riff-raff who, he supposed, were common labourers from some building job. Near enough to the wall clock, he took out his watch and reminded himself not to be late for the half-past two to Pontypool. The taste of his ale was swill compared to the Nottingham stuff, but he pushed his tankard forward for refilling, which would last him until Wales, where George had promised a very fine bitter – though we’ll see how right he is.

He settled himself into a window seat looking left, as know-all George had advised. When a woman who was sixty if she was a day pushed into the crowded carriage carrying a large basket with a lid, he stood to put it on the rack for her. ‘Are you going far?’

The train was crossing the Severn. ‘Only to Ledbury.’

The poor drab looked worn out, a bonnet lopsided on her grey hair. Must have been in Worcester selling her wares, for the basket was almost empty. ‘How far’s that?’

‘About forty minutes.’ A toothless smile told him she must live on gristle and baby food. ‘I’ve done it twice a week for the last twenty years, my son.’

‘Take my seat, then.’ Nobody else looked like getting up, as if she was beneath them because of whisky on her breath. ‘I’ve got legs to stand on,’ bending his head only to see more fields.

The train stopped at what looked like the side of a mountain, heavy cloud almost hiding big houses on the lower slopes. Trees and bushes shrouded a summit half-hidden by rainy mist, scenery reminding him of Derbyshire. The air was close, though he only ever sweated in the forge, where it ran off you like drink.

Most of the people got out, and a tunnel later the sky was blue. He seemed to have been travelling days instead of hours, Lenton far behind, glad to be away from working under the grudging eye of a father never satisfied with anything he did, though what Master Blacksmith would be?

Nothing to think about, he fancied another drink sooner than expected. Travelling put salt in your windpipe, and then he was diverted by a youngish woman in all-mourning black getting on at Hereford. He couldn’t show breeding by giving up his seat, because the carriage was empty, but the leather portmanteau he lifted onto the rack for her strained his arms as if filled with lead. Observing it, she told him it contained her devotional books.

Bibles and hymnals, it serves me right, but I couldn’t let her break such pretty little hands – rewarded in any case by the lift and fall of her bosom as she settled herself.

She didn’t thank him, not strictly needed, a good sign because if he talked to her later she might recall her lapse of courtesy and make it easier for him than otherwise. He took in everything without seeming to stare.

She wore a mantle and muffs, pale lips sighing as she took off her bonnet and laid it on her knees. The lifted veil showed a face so porcelain-fine he knew he wouldn’t deny himself a word or two later. Auburn hair, roping down her back to contrast with deep mourning, recalled Mary Ann’s at home, though he saw good reason to put her out of mind for a while.

Boots buttoned to the hem of her skirt shone black like his own, but a maid hadn’t buffed them up or she wouldn’t have been on the same class of train. She absorbed the landscape as if to draw out colour that might lighten her blackest of garbs. One hand lapped over the other didn’t hide her wedding ring, yet he thought it time to divert her from whatever tragedy soaked her through and through, and who better than himself to give such a service?

With the flicker of a smile he said: ‘I started out from Nottingham this morning’ – a remark which could bring no response, as he well knew, but you had to begin somewhere, though she didn’t even turn her head from a family of sheep on the hillside. Words he hadn’t used that day welled up for spending, could now let her know that someone in the world had worse troubles than her own. ‘A couple of miles before we got to Derby a chap threw himself out of the train.’

She was as much disturbed at being spoken to as by his shocking revelation. ‘Oh dear!’

‘It nearly made me late for the change to Worcester.’ Time to keep quiet, even if she said no more, and look at birds on telegraph wires, blocked by a cutting. He wondered what the label on her portmanteau said, but the wheels of her curiosity turned sooner: ‘Why did he commit such a terrible act?’

George had given an imitation of the Welsh lilt one night after a few pints in the White Hart. ‘Now you have me. I can’t think why. He was sitting next to me one minute, then the handle rattled and out he went. He was too quick for anybody to save.’

Her mouth showed small white teeth. ‘What a terrible sin,’ she repeated.

He wanted to hear more from her, so went on: ‘He wore a good suit, so it wasn’t poverty or debt that drove him to it, though you can’t always tell. Perhaps he’d got himself up specially this morning knowing what he was going to do. Some people only do a thing like that when they’re smartly dressed, as if they like to look formal as they float into hell. Or maybe he thought to do himself in only at that moment.’

‘But why?’ Not much colour came into her cheek, but it was a start. ‘My goodness, why?’

He wondered whether he hadn’t overdone it, though her question called for an answer. ‘Perhaps something in the newspaper upset him. Just before he jumped he’d been reading one, and when he went out it was still in his hand, as if he might want to finish what was in it when he got to where he thought he was going. You can never tell much about a chap like that.’

Her lips parted again, as if a smile was somewhere in her after all, though it was far too early. ‘Was the poor man dead?’

‘He could have been. He wasn’t moving when he was on the ground among the nettles.’ He liked the nettles part, amazed at what his lips came out with when he got going. ‘But just as the train was starting two constables lifted him on a cart and took him away to the infirmary. Unless the morgue was the place they had in mind.’

It was wrong to tell lies, but a plain tale to console was something else, and he waited for more words from her, though if they didn’t come it would be no loss to him. George always said there was a time to speak and a time to keep quiet, and you should always know when. If you let others speak it saved you bothering, and you might get to know something. Only talk when you knew what you wanted to say before opening your mouth. Then close it when you’d finished. On the other hand words could be like tadpoles. You might have them by the tail but they often slipped out.

Land rose mountainously to either side, the train spindling a river whose name he didn’t know, fields and rivers much the same everywhere. The lovely woman was so shy he forgot, his intention not to speak till she did. In any case he wondered about the wedding ring. ‘Are you travelling far, miss?’

She stared numbly. ‘I’m a married woman.’ A young and handsome man was only trying to be kind. ‘Not very far. I shall be alighting at Newbridge.’

George had mentioned it as two stops before his, so she would need his help at Pontypool on changing to the Swansea line. ‘My name’s Ernest Burton,’ he said, now that the waters of her speech had been broken. ‘But call me plain Burton. Everybody does. I’m going a bit beyond Newbridge, where my brother has a smithy. He tells me it’s a dirty little hole, though good for business.’

‘You could say the same about most settlements in the coalfields.’ She flushed, as if not sure her judgement was reasonable.

‘You’re in black, I see.’ Hardly possible not to, but what could you say? Her ability to speak seemed an accomplishment, so he had to come out with something. ‘You have my condolences,’ hoping that whatever happened had been long enough ago.

‘Thank you.’ Tears shone like pearls on her pale cheeks, and the ironed handkerchief from his pocket was there before she could pull hers from the muff, which she accepted as one was entitled to do in the land of mourning, so that if nothing else happened he’d kiss the memory of her cheeks on soft cotton as long as the imprint lasted.

‘My husband died three weeks ago.’ She looked towards the luggage rack, as if his image might appear by Ernest’s shoulder or as if, he thought, his body might be in the portmanteau.

Killed by a horse? Sunk with delirium tremens? Bludgeoned to death by a footpad? Got consumption and coughed himself to death? Suffered a growth? Had a seizure? He tried to guess. ‘That’s a terrible thing to have happened.’

The young man was as if sent by Our Lord to comfort her. ‘He was an engineer at a coalmine in Staffordshire.’

‘Such places are dangerous. I’ve never been down one.’

Another dab at her left eye. ‘I wish my husband hadn’t. It took all day to find his body under the coal, but the undertaker did a beautiful job.’

And so he should. Every man must know his trade. One of them would already be working on the chap who had jumped from the train near Derby – if it had happened – which he was about to mention but was glad he didn’t, because she said: ‘I’m going to live with my sister. My other possessions will go on by carrier.’

Church books in the portmanteau were too precious to be trusted to the road. Her grief was tempered by an air of tenderness in a compartment growing smaller by the minute, a loosening in her, as if she didn’t know where she was, or what she was doing or, what was better, wasn’t able to know – like the effect of a tot of whisky.

He felt as if alone with a woman in a meadow on a warm spring day, knowing there was only one thing to do before dusk came on. The unexpected sense of levity and opportunity was more than welcome, though he wondered whether it was only in him, at the same time sure a good measure came from her, pious as a dormouse or not.

He held her cold hands to give comfort, as a man should, his as ever hot, large compared to hers, a sheltering stove she couldn’t refuse. ‘What about your children?’

‘There aren’t any, which I suppose has turned out for the best, though I’m sorry the Good Lord didn’t bless me with some.’

Her husband’s spunk had been no good. ‘Was he a great age?’

‘He was twenty years older, a good and upright man.’

He would be, at that age. ‘I’m sure he was.’ Breath and body heat thickened the air between them. If this goes on we’ll need to be prised apart with a chisel. Time to get going, though not sure how she would take it. Moving to her side was a better place to console, seeing as how she needed him, but the goodness of his heart brought on more weeping, which wasn’t the ticket at all.

A passenger looked in for a seat but, unwilling to intrude on mutual and private grief, stepped down. A chink in the blind showed the train steaming along a valley, its whistle permitting them to do what they would, his only hope that no one else would try to get into the carriage.

He secured the blinds, and put his lips to her warm forehead. Hers were moist with a kiss no man could resist, or care what was behind it. A hand around her neck, the other at her well-covered bosom, he took in the rich clean odour of hair, yet held back from going like a bull at a gate, the urge to be fast a sure sign that you must go slowly.

She turned away, but a kiss at the nape of the neck always got them on the melt, Bible books in the portmanteau no defence for a woman’s flesh whose gander was up. A sudden leaning forward told him she knew it was too late to hold back, though any sign and he would have stepped up and asked her pardon. Men were rightly prosecuted for bothering women in trains, and the treadmill wasn’t for him.

A sudden jerk and she crushed herself to him, saying softly: ‘Oh, do take me, then.’

Not to accept her would be unmanly. He lifted her, a free hand drawing his raincoat from the rack to lay on the seat, using all his strength to let her down as if onto a bed of feathers. Clothed arms rustled around his neck, till the seat vibrated under her, carmine features contrasting with the black of mourning as she held out her arms.

No more waiting, he bundled up the complication of skirts, and she drew him through smells of lavender and sweat to the greed of that vital place. All control was given up as if only now able to allow it after her husband’s death. He held back to match her eagerness but she was determined not to let him (which couldn’t be held against her) and spent more quickly even than Leah.

An hour ago they hadn’t known each other, but she must have been half in death for it, the stars fixed that he would be the one to be drawn by her so completely. Glad that she had reason to be pleased with taking him as much as he had taken her, he was also amazed at a coupling of so few words, when with others he’d used many in his persuasions, Nottingham girls brazenly expecting them so as to save, he supposed, what they thought of as their modesty.

Her smile could only be for the ironic twist to his lips while she went back to her status of bereaved woman. The handkerchief that had dried her tears was used to wipe between her legs, as he stood away to fix his buttons. She held out her hand when he moved to put the soiled handkerchief into his bag of tools, demanding it for her reticule, then arranged her dress and sat down. He fetched out a clean one, blessing his mother who had ironed it so well. He looked into her eyes to let her know she deserved more than had been given. Flicking up the blind he was surprised that the world was still the same, yet thinking that if this was travelling by train he wouldn’t mind doing a bit more.

She shaded her eyes as if daylight was too much for them. ‘We’re close to Pontypool.’

Needing to smoke, he took out a packet of Robins, lit one, and dropped the spent match on the floor. He moved to touch her, at the flush knew she wanted him to, but there was only time for a press of hands. ‘I’ll see you walking the street at Newbridge, if I can get out a bit from my work.’

‘My sister’s husband is a Methodist minister, which is why I came third-class. The Good Lord doesn’t like waste.’

‘They’ll keep you locked up, I shouldn’t wonder.’

She arranged her mantle. ‘I’m a widow, so I can walk out on my own.’

‘I shall look for you.’ I could marry her, if I wanted the bother of courting, take an armful of blooms to meet her in-laws, and make them think I’m somebody I’m not. ‘What’s your name?’

She tied the strings of her bonnet. ‘I’m Mrs Dyslin.’

That wasn’t good enough. ‘And who’s she when she’s at table?’

‘Minnie.’

A pretty name. He had given his already, but didn’t want her to forget. ‘I’m Ernest Burton, blacksmith. My brother has a forge near Tredegar Junction.’

‘That’s close to my sister’s.’

‘So I might see you.’

She sat as if never wanting to leave. ‘I feel better than I did an hour ago.’

‘I’m glad. And I’m sorry for your loss, but you’ve got to go on living, whatever happens, that’s all I know.’ He was surprised at offering so many words of consolation. Well, he could talk when he wanted to.

‘You’re a young man.’

‘I’m twenty-one, and that’s not young. Not in my line it isn’t.’ She must be a few years older, but it wasn’t right to ask a woman’s age. Not that it mattered, as long as you gave her what she wanted.

‘I’m going to be the housekeeper at my sister’s, because she’s ailing much of the time. That’s all I can do with my life from now on, though there is a small annuity in my name. My sister has been married ten years, and has four children. Two are young, so I can teach them their letters, make myself useful in whatever way I can. Frank, he’s the minister, will be grateful if I arrange everything to do with the household, I know, which will help me forget my troubles.’

Maybe she’d have a child after what they had done, people thinking that the last act of a dutiful husband had been to lie with her, the timing more or less right. His smile brought one back, a rose opening under the warmth of summer, happiness that would need concealing once she got to where she was going.

The train squeaked alongside the platform at Pontypool Road station, and he reached for her bag, noting how much livelier and more attractive she was after what they had done, back in the world of the much desired where he hoped she would stay, because a woman can look beautiful at any age as long as loving spunk is pumped into her which goes straight to the eyes and makes them glitter with the come-on of a peahen everybody likes to see. There’s only one way to please a woman, and if another woman guesses what it is, I’ll please her as well. Minnie’s brother-in-law expects her to look sad in her black, so I hope he doesn’t wonder what she’s been up to.

He set their bags on the platform, held a hand for her to step down. George would twit him half to death if he could see him acting the cavalier.

‘The platform’s over there,’ she said on seeing him hesitate. ‘The notice says so.’

‘Ah, so it does.’ He kept a footstep behind, something against his habit, since a woman’s place was to walk after the man. When the train set off she was blawting again. Her husband had died three weeks ago, and she was crying because things would seem strange at her sister’s, till she got used to it. Women often cried for less, so he spared another handkerchief to mop the salty waters, feeling in some way responsible for her.

Two long pools flashed by, furnaces and collieries scattered over the valley. A train puffed and billied up a hillside among scarves of smoke. ‘At least you’ve got a sister to go to, and you’ll be all right once you get there. A family is all a person needs.’

She stopped crying. ‘It’s not that.’

He leaned forward to touch her warm cheek. ‘If her husband gets on to you, and makes your life miserable, I’ll have a word with him.’ He showed his fist, hard and worn with work. ‘I’ll look after you.’

She was shocked. Didn’t all women want protection from bullies? ‘It’s not that,’ she said. ‘It’s that I would like to see you again sometime.’

‘And so you shall.’ He was gratified, though not sure it would be possible because George would have him slaving all the hours God sent. ‘Write your address so that I shall know where to find you.’

She took a silver pencil and small pad of paper from her reticule.

‘And if you want to find me, send a note to the post office at Pontllanfraith,’ where George called for his letters. ‘That’ll find me.’

He slipped the note into his lapel pocket, looked at woods to either side of the track. ‘It’ll be the second stop after this,’ she said. ‘My brother-in-law told me in his letter that he would meet me with his pony and trap.’

The departure kiss was as if they were married, or at any rate as if he ought to marry her, though he scoffed at the notion. Her embrace was so passionate because of the loss of her husband, and maybe even of him. It could not be prolonged, though the look of tenderness pleased him. ‘I’ll put your bag on the platform.’

His tall figure leaned from the carriage window watching the brother-in-law greet her with uplifted hat, a slender middle-aged man whose smile was nowhere close to his face, a Stephen Meagrim in a Bible-black garb almost as deep as her own.

Glad to be by himself, he sat opposite a man and woman who fixed him as if knowing he couldn’t be of the area. The man was probably a farmer, and the bedraggled woman one you might see on a winter’s day trudging towards the workhouse. But they smiled, and wished him good afternoon.

Another cutting of green and shale, and the train stopped. The first thought as he stepped down was to slake the windpipe, but he must let George know he had arrived. He looked north, east, south and west and along the lane wondering where the forge could be, feeling more alone than he liked now that Minnie had gone. Seeing a ragged man covered in coal dust, as if he had just crawled out of the earth, he asked the way to the forge.

Teeth showed white when he smiled, Ernest barely understanding the singsong response, but waving hands gave the direction, and he walked towards houses on the main road.

The sky was cloudless, air sweet, a sun still high enough to warm the ripening hedges, a couple of larks arguing as if their wings were lips. It was good to be alive and on his own in a foreign country. Coal smoke tangled faintly at a change of wind as he put down his bags to light a cigarette. He would have plenty of work from now on, knowing George.

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