Copyright

First published in paperback by Collins in 2004

This electronic edition published by HarperCollins Children’s Books 2015

HarperCollins Children’s Books is an imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers 1 London Bridge Street, London SE1 9GF

The HarperCollins website address is www.harpercollins.co.uk

Text copyright © Ian Whybrow 2004

Illustrations copyright © Tony Ross 2004

Ian Whybrow and Tony Ross assert the moral right to be identified as the author and illustrator of the work.

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

HarperCollinsPublishers has made every reasonable effort to ensure that any picture content and written content in this ebook has been included or removed in accordance with the contractual and technological constraints in operation at the time of publication.

Source ISBN: 9780007157181

Ebook Edition © MAY 2015 ISBN: 9780008140151

Version: 2015-06-19

Map

For my faithful readers, Marcus and Michael Powell

and for their grandad, Tom, who looks after

the lot of us.

Contents

Cover

Title Page

Copyright

Map

Dedication

Little Wolf: Terror of the Shivery Sea

Other Books By Ian Whybrow

About the Author

About the Publisher

My Desk

Dear Mum and Dad,

Please please PLEEEEEZ take Smells back to Murkshire to stay with you at the Lair. Go on, just for a short while, like ten years maybe, hint hint. You know he is your darling baby pet. Plus you are a lot fiercer than me, so you can stop him messing up your stuff.

Yeller wants me do Trick Practiss with him. Tricks is 1 of my best things, I love them, kiss kiss. BUT (big but) Smells keeps messing us about. Like if you are trying to have a private conservash condensayshun chat about fake bat poo or itchy powder, Smells keeps butting in hummingly.

Also, he pulls down his sailor suit bottoms saying, “Look at my pants, they got Stooffer the Steam Engine on them, nar nar!” Just because he is jealous of my pants saying Wiggly World, I bet.

So cubbish.

I wish wish you would take him back, because now he has got a habit of going in a loud way till you play Doctor Monster with him. He makes you be ill in bed so he can do harsh operations on you that really hurt.

You have him for a bit, go on, he is your cub. I am only his big bruv, so not fair, eh?

Yours snugglupply,

L Wolf, son Numero Un (french)

Kitchen Table

Dear Mum and Dad,

You have not replied to my letter about taking Smells back. I know you have been having a nice long winter hibernate, so maybe it is best to say my chums’ names for you in a xplainy way. (Just in case of your branes being shut down still, OK?)

Now (xplainy voice) my best friend and cuz is Yeller Wolf, hmmm? He has got loads of BIG IDEAS and shouts a lot.

My next best friends are Normus Bear (wopping mussels)

plus Stubbs Crow (clever beak, says “ARK!” a lot).

These are some adventures we have done before, OK?

turn over

Daring Deeds at Adventure Academy.

Haunting at Haunted Hall with dead Uncle Bigbad as our Top Ghost. (He died of eating 2 many bakebeans 2 fast and went off bang, remember?)

Being Frettnin Forest Detective Agency, that was good.

Camping out, tracking ect. with me being Pack Leader.

Now we are trying to think up another fine adventure to have, but Smells is spoiling it for us, NOT FAIR.

Yours remindingly,

L Wolf, son

Down The Coalhole

Dear Mud and Dam,

Thank you for your sharp note saying pack up reminding people. Also you do not like me saying about your brane being shut down, so I must lock myself in the coalhole for cheek. OK, but serve you right if this writing is on the wonk (dark in here) .

About saying “Yes?” and “Hmmm? ” and all that. You say that is a big sauce, talking to you in a xplainy way. Because you are big parents, not small weaky fluffballs, so now I must suck a bar of soap, OR ELSE. Plus I must pack in whining and saying not fair.

OK, I will count myself lucky being able to spend time with my baby bruv, but can you check your clock to see how long that time is? I think it has got stuck.

Yours punishedly,

Little Filth (coaldust)

PS I have not done the soapsucking part yet. Sorry, but I cannot do my best writing plus spitting out bubbles at the same time.

PPS I am doing it now, spit spit, bluck.

Drawer Number 3 (ahh cosy),

Chester Draws, My Room

Dear Mum and Dad,

Shame about Dad catching a touch of the Mange, so now he is all germy. You say Smellybreff cannot come near Dad for ages, in case he might catch it. His fur will go itchy and drop off in rugsize lumps, oo-er.

Yes, I understand Dad is being noble in a wolfly way. (If he is not telling a wopping FAT FIB, hint hint.) By the way, is the Mange like blancMange? Because you never get fur on that either, funny, eh? Only if you leave it out of the fridge for a week.

Yours askingly,

Son wun

My Room

Dear M and D,

You know when I was down the coalyhole sucking soap for getting on your nerves? Well I found a dusty old pic chucked out by Uncle Bigbad, a big 1 with a posh frame.

I thought, I know, give it a bit of a soapy lick, see who is under the dust. Then I found out. It is a fearsum old wolf plus beard, scar ect., all covered in guns and daggers! He has got a funny hat on with a mutton bones badge made out of jewels, all sparkly like his earring. He has got a crool, teasy look on his face, plus he is sitting on a big strong old chest. In his paw he is holding a long twisty stick, looks like coff candy, only made of elephant tusks, maybe.

I gave the notice underneath a good shine up on my fur so you can see some words, they are:

I wonder who that Blackfur was. I bet he was an olden day park-keeper that was all snarl and snappish, yes?

Yours surmisingly,

Detective Inspectickles Wolf (get it?)

PS Clue: no it is me wearing spectickles really.

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